# Lost my Girl about 3 months ago...



## eric83 (Jun 28, 2011)

I haven't been that much of an active poster on the boards, but I found it to be quite the resource for information in raising my pup. 

I haven't been here much as of late because of the pain of her loss. We had to put her down in February and I have been utterly broken about it since. 

Piper started displaying some really heavy reactivity issues around 4 months old and we started working hard to battle them. It didn't make much sense to us because the breeder we went through was recommended to me by someone through our agility club. Little time later told us that the breeder was less than scrupulous I could kick myself for not realizing it sooner but when you've trusted someone for years and they had yet to steer you wrong I suppose trust just continues until they do. 

We had her in puppy kindergarten from 10 weeks when we brought her home, level 1 obedience after that. An every weekend meet up that would let her socialize and proof her manners, but the genetics I guess was the overriding factor. 

For the last year we went through a couple of different behaviorists, and eventually went through a veterinary behaviorist that had an interest in neurology because we had to have images taken and blood work drawn etc to rule out medical conditions like thyroid. 

We were set to just manage her behavior when she started to just seemingly forget who we were...the first instance happened with my mother who had been staying with us. She went into the kitchen to wash a dish and Piper, who had known her from 10 weeks old, leapt onto her back and bit her. The second instance happened to me when I came home from class, she ran at me and I had to shield my face in order to push her off of me. The third instance happened to my fiancee, she had been cooking for about 30 minutes and Piper had been laying in the kitchen watching her cook when she turned around from the oven Piper lunged from across the kitchen and my fiancee had to call me into the kitchen to put her in the crate. It was odd because they didn't happen all at once she seem to regain herself for a couple of weeks and then it would happen again.

The neurologist said it was probably genetic. Something hardwired that was very wrong. It still killed us, we decided to try to stick it out and manage but then she did it again, and this time hit a 4 year old little girl one she had known and been completely fine with for a long time. She leapt over the couch and bit her under the eye (the little girl had been playing back there quietly for about an hour she hadn't even made eye-contact with Piper)...three days after we made the decision to have her put down. That final attack came a little after neurosis started to kick in, chasing shadows and her reflection constantly.

I'm still dealing with the grief from it. It still hurts like ****. I hope to do more research and in about two years bring a GSD pup home who will be balanced and solid nerved. I still love the breed, it still gives me a pang in my stomach to see them on the street. I still love Piper, I'm just devastated by what she had to go through. Everyone has told us it was the right the decision...she was living in constant fear of living due the breeding she came from...and it made her dangerous even to us...

I guess this was more for closure for me than for you guys since we weren't much of a presence here, but here we will remain using the wonderful resources here to hopefully find a breeder who will produce for us a stable dog that we can offer a good life for in the next couple of years. 

Rest in Peace Girly


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## kiya (May 3, 2010)

Very sorry to read your story, unfortunately sometimes in life we have no controll over things. We do the best we can and all you can do is hope for is the best.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

I"m so very sorry for all you have been through. Sometimes it is kinder to release them from their demons. RIP Piper. May you run free with peace.


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## fuzzybunny (Apr 29, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss and all you had to deal with.


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## jakes mom (Feb 29, 2012)

Eric

I am so sorry - and I understand the terrible heartache you've gone through - we have the same problem and we are managing it - it's going well at the moment because our dog is being treated with epilepsy drugs.
But the worry hangs over our heads.

You made a very brave decision - I so admire you.
_______________
Sue


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## Shade (Feb 20, 2012)

I'm so sorry  

My family had to put down a golden retriever with FA due to genetics as well, she was only 3  We tried everything with her, including ruling out physical issues as you did with our vet. She was fine with our family but anyone else it was a risk and we realized her quality of life was so poor with having to be confined we made the decision to let her go. It really hurt to let such a young promising dog go but knowing she's at peace finally made it worth it


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## eric83 (Jun 28, 2011)

Thank you everyone for your words, it helps to hear from others who can understand. 

Sue - I feel for you in that. Managing can be difficult and it's such a precarious line to tow, with Piper we were always afraid we would be lulled into a false sense of security during her "good" phases, the unpredictability is so painful especially when it happens to you, its very difficult. Piper was briefly on a couple of different drugs, one I believe was an anti-depressant mood stabilizer and it really didn't help at all, the other caused her to pretty much be a zombie, and we weren't willing to let her live that way. I hope the medications and treatment goes better for you and yours.


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## jakes mom (Feb 29, 2012)

Thanks Eric,

That's the problem - the false sense of security - but Jake is so lovely and we're keeping our fingers crossed that the medication, coupled with us making sure we keep his stress levels as low as possible will keep us all safe. 

I hope you have more success with your next GSD. It's amazing how a new dog to love eases the pain. I know when we lost our previous GSD suddenly, we couldn't face having another dog but we had Jake from the rescue 8 months later. We already had a Dalmation who had shared her life with our GSD and she was so depressed without her mate - it did her good as well to have Jake - even though Jake was scared of her to start with. 
_________________
Sue


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## Stosh (Jun 26, 2010)

May Piper's demons be her angels now.


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## elsie (Aug 22, 2001)

:hug::hug::hug:


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## Beau (Feb 12, 2012)

Stosh said:


> May Piper's demons be her angels now.


Very well said! 

Thoughts and prayers are with you as you deal with this loss.


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## OriginalWacky (Dec 21, 2011)

Reading your story reminds me very much of what we went through with our Missy. We also had to make the tough choice to euth her, and it doesn't get easier per se, but it does ease up somewhat. I'm very sorry for your loss, and hope that you find peace with your decision sooner rather than later.


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