# Crazy Poo Stories!



## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

Let's hear about your crazy poop stories!


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## Heagler870 (Jun 27, 2009)

Them eating poop or actually pooping? Or both? Lol


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

Heagler870 said:


> Them eating poop or actually pooping? Or both? Lol


Any and everything about poop!


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## Heagler870 (Jun 27, 2009)

I stepped barefoot in Rileys poop when he was a puppy. I woke up and he had escaped his crate and I went to find him and "smoosh smooth, slide......" and fell on my butt because the floors were all concrete. That was Riley's way of saying "How dare you crate me!" Lol


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## Josie/Zeus (Nov 6, 2000)

My 2 year old son picked one up this weekend and tried to give it back to Odin- he said "here Odin". Gross.


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## JustMeLeslie (Sep 15, 2010)

Josie/Zeus said:


> My 2 year old son picked one up this weekend and tried to give it back to Odin- he said "here Odin". Gross.


That is too funny!:laugh: Gross but funny!


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

Josie/Zeus said:


> My 2 year old son picked one up this weekend and tried to give it back to Odin- he said "here Odin". Gross.


:spittingcoffee:


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## pyratemom (Jan 10, 2011)

I learned never to ignore Raina when she whines in her crate during the night. She never whines for no reason and I was too tired to fully wake up. Next thing I heard was her having diarrhea in her crate - so dog bath and crate cleaning in the middle of the night. Not fun. She is coated and has very long fluffy hair to clean. It takes a long time to dry - do not want to do this in the middle of the night ever again. :hammer:


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## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

Hubby had a JTR that was his dog. They were two peas on a pod. One evening hubby ticked off the JTR, I don't recall why. In the middle of the night I heard hubby, "What the  is this? What the  is this?" I turned on the light to see hubby holding a piece of poop in his hands. The dog had gone UNDER the blanket, backed up to hubby and pooped on his leg. 

Everytime we tell this story it cracks me up. Just to picture the little dog pitching a tent under the blankets, using careful aim.....and hubby having no idea what he had in his hand was poop till I turned on the light. The dog, stayed curled up pretending to be asleep.


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

Lilie said:


> Hubby had a JTR that was his dog. They were two peas on a pod. One evening hubby ticked off the JTR, I don't recall why. In the middle of the night I heard hubby, "What the  is this? What the  is this?" I turned on the light to see hubby holding a piece of poop in his hands. The dog had gone UNDER the blanket, backed up to hubby and pooped on his leg.
> 
> Everytime we tell this story it cracks me up. Just to picture the little dog pitching a tent under the blankets, using careful aim.....and hubby having no idea what he had in his hand was poop till I turned on the light. The dog, stayed curled up pretending to be asleep.


:rofl::spittingcoffee::rofl::spittingcoffee::rofl:


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## Wolfiesmom (Apr 10, 2010)

We all know ow my Wolfie loves his logs. He was on top of the log pile the other day, picking out which one to use. I could see him twirling around on top of the pile, and I thought he was going to poop right on the logs. He finally perched himself so that his butt was over the edge of the pile, and pooped over the edge, then went back to what he was doing. I thought for sure he was going to fall off the edge.


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## JustMeLeslie (Sep 15, 2010)

Well my story is non GSD it involves my min pin. This is when I had my other min pin Kato. He had a bad habit of eating mushrooms out in the yard. Well it was late at night we were already in bed. Apparently he jumped out of bed and had explosive diarrhea right by the bed. The smell was so bad it woke me from my sleep at like 3 in the morning. I woke up to the most horrible smell ever. I jumped out of bed thankfully missing the poop. He was still projectile pooping I mean it was explosive. He didn't feel so good let's just say that. It took everything I could not to vomit. That was the most nastiest case of diarrhea I had ever had to clean. Thank goodness for my steam cleaner. He never went around another mushroom after that. I didn't have to teach him to stay away from them after that he avoided them from there on out.


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## GSDGunner (Feb 22, 2011)

You've heard the old saying "**** roles down hill"? 
I've seen it!
We were at our park one day and there's a place in the back that's all wooded. There are baseball and football fields on either side. There's a huge parking lot in the middle and you have to go up this hilly area to get to the one field.

I was on the concrete, Gunner was walking on the grassy incline when he decides it's THAT time. How he was able to keep his balance while pooping is beyond me. He was teetering back and forth trying to keep his balance on the hill. As he was pooping, it was literally rolling down the hill. I couldn't help but laugh thinking of that old saying.


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## Good_Karma (Jun 28, 2009)

Every now and then, not very often, Niko will assume the poop stance...and* pee *instead! All over his belly and legs!!! So gross...


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## Powie (Mar 29, 2011)

GSD no. 1 (Max) crapped on the ex-wifes pillow right next to her head once. I could feel the dog fidgeting and suddenly x says "I smell dog crap!" I turned the light on and laughed uncontrollably at the sight.

Had a beagle that used to root thru the cat's litter box for the perfect morsel and then parade around with it like she'd won a prize. She also like to dine on and roll in deer crap.

Powie was a turd eater but seems to have lost this fine trait...


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## DCluver33 (May 27, 2010)

omg this thread is hilarious. Lilie and Powie :rofl: I'm still laughing at those stories.

I don't have any poop stories....yet I'm sure I'll come home to explosive diarriah now that I've said that.


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## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

When Hondo poos, he cranks his tail up and down with each turd. Like he is pumping them out. Great source of amusment when company is sitting outside.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

Having a troop of dogs means that every morning and every evening, I go on Poo patrol. I have a No Poo Left Behind Policy, because I could literally be up to my butt in poo if I let it get away from me. 

My neighbors must think I am crazy because while doing the dooty, I often sing songs adjusted to the subject on hand. Every morning, I try to get everyone to poo before putting them in their kennels for the day so I can pick it up out of the yard. 

Recently, my poo-song has been:
Oh you can't hurry poo --
You just have to wait
They say poo don't come easy
It's a game of give and take

How much poo can they make?
How much more can I take [this is actually pretty important as it refers to my shovel]
Just trust -- give it time
No matter how long it takes...

Anyhow, in my job, I deal with a lot of Poo. I am a Poo Manager, Poo handler, Poo critic.
the only thing worse than runny poo is NO POO. No Poo always makes me more worried.

Also, the girls are like two year olds. They get distracted and do not poo. They will walk around, and I will KNOW they have to poo. And sure enough I am always right. 

People do not give me credit for all the poo I deal with. 

It is a poopy job in some ways.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

My haunch up, and bend their tail so that it is pointing to the ground, like "I am going to put it.... there!"


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## GSDGunner (Feb 22, 2011)

Well, it's not a cute story, but lets just say that poop isn't supposed to look like that so I ran a sample over to the vet just now. 
He's had SIBO before and had a bad bout with irritated intestines as well.

Sorry, didn't mean to hijack the fun.


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## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

That is so funny Selzer! "No poo left behind..." cracks me up!


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## gsdraven (Jul 8, 2009)

selzer said:


> People do not give me credit for all the poo I deal with.
> 
> It is a poopy job in some ways.


Maybe you can get Mike Rowe to do a special "Dirty Jobs" episode about your Poo job.


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

I have 2 poop stories

One day I am rushing to get ready for work and I go to leave and my cat Chaos is sitting by her litterbox but she looked weird, I wasn't sure what she was doing so I stopped to watch. I kept saying "What are you doing?" "What's wrong with you?" Then she looked at me and pooped in my shoe! WHAT THE HECK! I was late to work because I had to clean the poop out of my shoe!


The other day my cousin had her friend Dave over. My cousin went outside to smoke so she left Dave in the house to harrass my cats (he loves cats). I am sitting in my room with when I look up and see a GIANT spider on my ceiling! I opened the door and screamed "Anaconda! Anaconda! Anaconda!" Dave looked looked at me like I was insane. I told him to come in my room and kill it and he said he's scared of snakes and I should call animal control! I said "What the heck are you talking about Dave, it's a freaking spider, not a snake!" He goes into my room and takes off his shoe to kill it and I smell the worst smell ever and at that moment my cousin walks in wondering what's going on and I said "I dont know but Dave's feet smell like poop (not the word I used)" and he said "That's not my feet, I thought you farted!" I said "Dave, I'd admit to a fart that bad, that's gotta be a record". We both look at my cousin and she's like it wasn't me. Then we notice a trail of brown crap under her foot! She stepped in poop outside and dragged it through the house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I never laughed so hard! :laugh:


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## Powell (Oct 13, 2006)

No funny stories, but when Mickey my Silly Siberian poops he pees at the same time.

I call it the dual download...

Powell


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## ChancetheGSD (Dec 19, 2007)

Good_Karma said:


> Every now and then, not very often, Niko will assume the poop stance...and* pee *instead! All over his belly and legs!!! So gross...


Chance does the opposite, he will lift his leg to pee and end up pooping. 

One of the funniest poop stories I've ever heard came from my manager at the last kennel I worked for. We had these two super old (like 18) Toy Poodles named Joshua and Daisy who used to come in. They were blind, deaf, had no control over their urine/bowels, had no teeth, were walking skeletons and just really bad off but the owner refused to put them down. :crazy: Anyways, Joshua's "thing" was to pace the kennel wall and Daisy's was to turn circles all.day.along. Well, occasionally Joshua would get caught on top of Daisy so Daisy would be spinning circles and Joshua would be moving his paws trying to walk while he's caught over Daisy's back. Well apparently, this happened one day and Joshua got explosive diarrhea. The scene was explained to me like a little poop merry-go-around. :rofl: I couldn't stop laughing and even now thinking about it makes me giggle despite how gross it is.


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## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

LaRen616 said:


> The other day my cousin had her friend Dave over. My cousin went outside to smoke so she left Dave in the house to harrass my cats (he loves cats). I am sitting in my room with when I look up and see a GIANT spider on my ceiling! I opened the door and screamed "Anaconda! Anaconda! Anaconda!" Dave looked looked at me like I was insane. I told him to come in my room and kill it and he said he's scared of snakes and I should call animal control! I said "What the heck are you talking about Dave, it's a freaking spider, not a snake!" He goes into my room and takes off his shoe to kill it and I smell the worst smell ever and at that moment my cousin walks in wondering what's going on and I said "I dont know but Dave's feet smell like poop (not the word I used)" and he said "That's not my feet, I thought you farted!" I said "Dave, I'd admit to a fart that bad, that's gotta be a record". We both look at my cousin and she's like it wasn't me. Then we notice a trail of brown crap under her foot! She stepped in poop outside and dragged it through the house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> I never laughed so hard! :laugh:


I thought you scared the poop out of the spider!


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## GSD_Xander (Nov 27, 2010)

OMG these are all hilarious! 

:rofl:

Between revenge poos, stepping in poo, and poo songs! LMAO!!!


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## krystyne73 (Oct 13, 2010)

OMG! I have a funny story!!
My friend had a young standard poodle.
One day he came in my office telling me to shut the door, he had a story....

Apparently he had taken his dog to the park in his new car. 
He said the dog was pacing around the car seat next to him. He told me that he could tell the dog had to poop but he was in traffic, so instead of pulling over or stopping the car... he held out his hand and caught the fresh dog poop in his hand!! 

I never get tired of telling that story hahahah


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## Good_Karma (Jun 28, 2009)

Oh, I remembered one that my husband told me. Someone at the company he works for brought a puppy to work on a day when the boss was out of town. This guy didn't keep a super close eye on the pup, and it wandered away from him. My husband had to go into the boss's office for something, and discovered that the puppy had been in there and left a "gift."

I guess they managed to get the stain out of the carpet and the boss never found out.


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## Ellie (Jun 26, 2009)

Ellie comes to work with me and we used to have a dog walker come and take them on walks. One day, she comes back with Ellie saying "she rolled in poop". 

(Ellie is not known to roll in anything, let alone poop, but this dog walker was questionable with her skills anyway...)

I look to see, and there is a HUGE smear of very soft poop all over the side of her face and neck and collar. The trainer and I spent the next 20 minutes in the bathroom wetting paper towels and wiping. I literally gagged from the smell and the lady laughed at me. Ohhh it was SOOO gross!


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## Good_Karma (Jun 28, 2009)

Eeeeew! Rosa rolled in poop a couple of weeks ago! ONE HOUR before Niko's new trainer was coming to the house to meet him for the first time. I can't imagine if I had to try and use wet paper towels to clean her up! I was lucky I was able to give her a quick bath before the trainer came.

It was only the second time she'd rolled in poop. She managed to do it last summer too. Some kind of animal poop, no idea what animal though. But it was definitely poop.


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## x0emiroxy0x (Nov 29, 2010)

I go out drinking with my friends once a month or less due to a heavy school and work load...
The *one* night I went out drinking two months ago, I wake up around 9am to the most disgusting smell I have ever encountered...
I hadn't gotten home until around 3:30, so I was still pretty drunk when I lifted the cover over Rocky's kennel...

He had SPRAYED diahrea on :

1. the new blanket that covered the left side of his kennel
2. The wall and carpet behind his kennel
3. The bed and comforter on the right of his kennel
4. the entire bottom of his kennel

and had ROLLED all in it. He seriously was brown from the neck down. 
How did I get him to the shower?? I CARRIED him and got covered in CRAP!!

((But I did get out of cleaning the kennel...hehehe. I gave him a super long minute shower and massage in the shower so that when we got out, my boyfriend had finished hosing it off))


The worst part wasn't that I was already sick from the vodka I had earlier....It was that he had diarhea the same way the next night and it was my turn to clean the kennel


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## lisgje (Sep 3, 2010)

chance is the only dog I have every had that seems to intentionally run through his own poop. All over his feet and then wants to jump on me! Ick. Even when I am trying to clean up the yard, he goes running right into it! Think he does it to see my horrified reaction and seems to laugh at me! LOL


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## Zoeys mom (Jan 23, 2010)

I pulled my favorite undies out of Zoe's butt the other day because she was straining so hard to pass them...not very funny to me at least but the dh loved watching


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

Your favorite pair?

So what do you do, pitch them or put them in the washer???? 

I have never had a dog eat a clothing article yet, I hope I did not just jinx myself.


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## Zoeys mom (Jan 23, 2010)

Oh their trash lol but I was sad to see them go. Come on you don't have a favorite pair of drawers? I know I'm not alone here,lol and if I am oh well I love my underwear The real bummer was Victoria's Secret doesn't carry the particular print anymore....devastating,lol 

And yes just imagine me in the yard with latex gloves on gently pulling my undies out of her tush while yelling dammit Zoe those are my favorite what is wrong with you? I came in to a red faced hysterical hubby and 2 laughing kids making all sorts of jokes about mommy


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## DCluver33 (May 27, 2010)

Zoeys mom said:


> Oh their trash lol but I was sad to see them go. Come on you don't have a favorite pair of drawers? I know I'm not alone here,lol and if I am oh well I love my underwear The real bummer was Victoria's Secret doesn't carry the particular print anymore....devastating,lol
> 
> And yes just imagine me in the yard with latex gloves on gently pulling my undies out of her tush while yelling dammit Zoe those are my favorite what is wrong with you? I came in to a red faced hysterical hubby and 2 laughing kids making all sorts of jokes about mommy


:rofl: :spittingcoffee: that's really funny. at least she passed them and didn't get a blockage


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

No. My momma taught me that if you find something you like, you go out and buy a dozen of them, LOL! (because the next time you try to find them, they will be gone)


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## Luke.a (Feb 25, 2011)

My friend has a Jack russell and one day he was changing his child's nappy and some poo rolled out onto the floor and the dog ran over and ate it .

He said there was nothing he could do the dog was too fast :laugh: and he nearly threw up Im guessing the dog would of ate that too.


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## Lin (Jul 3, 2007)

A few weeks back during my training class one of the dogs pooped. The trainer (who owns the facility) grabbed the pooper scooper to take care of it. As he was doing so he stopped and turned to the kids sitting in the chairs while their parents trained, and said "stay in school kids, or you'll grow up to be a pooper scooper like me"

Years ago... My foster dog Molly and my boy Logan both got explosive diarrhea at the same time. And all over my living room floor... So I was on my hands and knees cleaning the floor and using my spot bot to clean the carpet when Tessa walks in, and PUKES all over the carpet. Now I don't know if she was sick too, or it was a comment on the smell in the room... I threw out all the defrosted meat in my fridge just in case, but I'm leaning towards it having been a comment on the smell in the room.


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## Lin (Jul 3, 2007)

I just thought of some more stories... Not poop ones but they're close! 

One time I had to take a foster dog to the ER vet for vomiting blood. So I was on the phone with the rescue coordinator, who was trying to make me feel better. And she told me this story about one of the foster dogs... It was in severe pain, to the point where if it was touched or walked it was screaming and crying... So they rushed the dog to the vet, and the vet was running tests and xrays and trying to figure out what was wrong with the poor dog... While waiting, they took the dog outside to see if it needed to potty, and it let out the longest fart they had ever heard... Said it seemed like it went on for 5 minutes straight. Then the dog was fine, the pain and screaming was gas pain :crazy:

This ones a vomit story. One time I was out, and my roommate calls me to tell me Logan threw up. And he's not cleaning it up, so I'll have to when I get back. I said fine I'm nearly home anyway. So I get home, and say hey where's the vomit? By the couch. I walk over... I don't see it. Hey show me exactly where it is? He walks over... Looks around for a minute... And goes "hey, you've got a self cleaning dog" I nearly threw up myself. 

One time I was sick, and Tessa was sitting there watching me throw up into the garbage can... Then she throws up on the floor. Sympathy vomit?

Oh and here's one thats actual poop story. My ex told me his dog had an obsession with qtips. The dog was a small chihuahua/terrier mix, and one time pooped a bunch of qtips all at once coming out together and he had to help pull them out


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## Kris10 (Aug 26, 2010)

Okay I have a fairly recent one. We had a particularly cold winter for here and Max loved it. I saw him outside throwing something up in the air and catching it in his mouth like it was the greatest thing ever! There was snow and ice on the ground, but this didn't look like any of that. The last time I saw him doing this with an unknown item it was part of the pressed concrete patio...so I immediately reached into his mouth to pull out the dark colored item and after further inspection (and getting hit by the smell) I realized it was a frozen turd.


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## Good_Karma (Jun 28, 2009)

The "pulling stuff out of your dog's butt" stories are soooo nasty! Niko is a grass eater. I've pulled foot long pieces of grass out of his butt. And gotten poop on my hands in the process. Two miles from home. Armed with just a kleenex.


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## Powie (Mar 29, 2011)

I used to have a beagle that would eat the tinsel off the Christmas tree. Nothing quite like a pudgy beagle parading around the house with a turd bouncing along behind her attached to her butt by a piece of tinsel. It was quite festive!


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

Tinsel Poo -- I have to add that to my list of poos.


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## webzpinner (Mar 7, 2011)

The other day, I ate some REALLY spicy mexican food, and... oh wait... these are dog poo stories... my bad...


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

webzpinner said:


> The other day, I ate some REALLY spicy mexican food, and... oh wait... these are dog poo stories... my bad...


:spittingcoffee:


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## webzpinner (Mar 7, 2011)

Zoeys mom said:


> Oh their trash lol but I was sad to see them go. Come on you don't have a favorite pair of drawers? I know I'm not alone here,lol and if I am oh well I love my underwear The real bummer was Victoria's Secret doesn't carry the particular print anymore....devastating,lol
> 
> And yes just imagine me in the yard with latex gloves on gently pulling my undies out of her tush while yelling dammit Zoe those are my favorite what is wrong with you? I came in to a red faced hysterical hubby and 2 laughing kids making all sorts of jokes about mommy


LOL... Victoria Secret's new line: "Dog digestible underwear!" with the tagline: "Our new thongs are so small, it goes right through even the smallest chihuahua!" hehehe


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