# Want GS but have anxiety



## evansfam2010 (Nov 17, 2016)

Hi! I have longed for a GS since I was about 5. I'm now 27, with 3 boys ages 5 and under and I am beginning to search for a family dog. Unfortunately I have extremely high anxiety and both my mom and sister say a GS would not be a good dog from me because of my anxiety. They think the dog will recognize my anxiety and try to protect me when protection is not needed...possibly leading to one of my kids being attacked. We have never had a GS in the family, but since they are bread for guarding and police work, the assumption is it would not be a good fit for me. But before I give up my dream of owning one, I thought I would ask people who know the breed a bit better. So, with small kids and my anxiety being what it is, should I steer clear of this beautiful breed? TIA


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## Julian G (Apr 4, 2016)

Well, this breed needs a strong and confident and most importantly a calm leader. I wouldn't recommend one for a first time dog owner. Raising a puppy is one of the hardest thing I ever did. It's a roller coaster ride, they bite, they act wild, they seem vicious, they tear things, they chase anything that moves, they jump on you. Throughout all of this you have to stay in control and be calm and KNOW that this is completely normal, something that many first time owners simply can't do and end up giving them away to the pound. Having said all that, once you raise them right they are the best and most loyal friend you can have. I'm just concerned that with your anxiety and young kids running around you will have a lot of trouble raising or keeping one properly. It's not fair for the dog.


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## Spetzio (Oct 8, 2015)

I'm a long time lurker and viewer of these forums, but I can certainly speak to the anxiety aspect. I also have pretty severe anxiety, to the point where I was unable to leave my house for a time, ended up in the ER one night, was miserable every moment of the day, etc. etc. I've attempted therapy and medication, and while both have certainly helped me to a great degree, it's still here. I'm also in the same boat in that I'll be getting my first GSD, though not my first dog, within a few months. My situation is different, of course. I'm 24, no kids of my own. Just me and my family (mom, dad, and 22yr old brother), so I don't have to worry about younger kids. And I've done my research - over a year's worth, both online and out in the field, so to speak. But dogs have always calmed me down. In fact, my anxiety didn't start until I lost my previous dog of 14 years. Dogs can make me relax, smile, laugh, and run around and play for hours without a care in the world. They can be great for both physical and mental health. While I know how much work a puppy can be, I also know that that kind of focus is exactly what I need. 

I've also had the advantage of having close relatives whose puppies I've been able to puppy-sit and train each week, as well as experienced firsthand the whirlwind that is the GSD puppy, and the GSD adult at local IPO trials and just day-to-day out in public. I know what I'm getting into, and I wouldn't have it any other way. But that's definitely a question to ask yourself. If you've never had dogs before, much less a puppy, it can be a huge shock. It can cause even more stress, frustration, and worry. I'm not sure what type of anxiety you experience - for me, it's panic attacks that include shortness of breath, racing heart - essentially, the "I feel like I'm dying," type. Adding all those previous stressors on top if you're not equipped to handle them will definitely elevate your anxiety. 

On the other hand, if you've always taken comfort in dogs and the focus required to care for one calms you down, it might be worth researching more about the breed to see if it truly is right for you. Sure, they're beautiful, expressive, loyal, intelligent, and diligent. But there's much more to them than that. And there are quite a few other breeds that can fit that bill without... uh, so much teeth, haha. My hands may or may not have many little needle puncture marks in them from my relative's new rambunctious (and adorable... and terrible) GSD puppy. He's as much a pushy, painfully mouthy, constantly moving turd as he is a sweet, cuddly (sometimes), velcro lovebug. But I love him anyway. It's important to consider all aspects of a puppy, how your kids will respond, and how you'll respond to what may occur to your kids - puppies are cute, but their teeth, little as they are, can still draw blood! 

This is literally the longest and most pointless post ever that ultimately can be summarized in me saying that there are quite a few factors to consider, not just your anxiety. I'm terrible, sorry.


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## cloudpump (Oct 20, 2015)

Dogs have been known to help reduce anxiety. Talk to a reputable breeder that breeds balanced dogs.


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

German shepherds are not recommended as psychiatric service dogs for this reason. Particularly for people with PTSD because the theory is: say the person has a panic attack or flashback and believes they are in imminent danger (which happens with PTSD), the dog senses the person's terror and mistakenly assumes it is directed toward the good samaritan who is now trying to approach and help so the dog tries to scare off the "threat"

Or say the person is afraid fo going out after dark and when they walk the dog at night they are afraid constantly so the dog starts trying to identify the threat again and just becomes reactive to every little thing on night time walks.

One question I would have and you don't need to answer it publicly but what is your anxiety directed at or what is it about. I think people with PTSD who fear another attack are probably more likely to wind up with a confused dog because they may literally feel like a neutral person is going to attack them. I would think generalized anxiety, or anxiety not related to safety, would be less confusing to the dog.

Shepherds are extremely sensitive to stuff like this and you might do well to ask yourself what kind of dog would be better for you to live with. I have had all kinds, and I must say the dopey non shepherd personalities were sometimes just a huge relief. As an example I have a very troubled step daughter who has caused quite a bit of family drama and emotional upset. My one dog would just about literally roll his eyes and be like "I'll be in the other room, let me know when this is over" where my shepherd was trying to go from person to person to fix everything, which she couldn't do, which was upsetting to her, and frankly upsetting to me to see her so upset and I almost wished she could have just rolled her eyes and left, too.

The reason they recommend labs and golden type dogs for PTSD dogs is because they are much more like "never met a stranger" type dogs and less likely to get suspicious of people because their owner is. Once they start getting suspicious together it is like a feedback loop. 

What I will say though, is that I can't really see how no matter what the dog misinterpereted, that it would become aggressive toward your kids as a result? That would just be an unstable dog, period. What I could imagine is the dog becoming overprotective of your kids, depending on what you are like as a person and again what your anxiety is about.

Have you tried to get any treatment for yourself? You don't have the dog yet so maybe take the time to work on yourself? There are lots of good treatments available. 

Besides that if you do get a GSD vet your breeder carefully and make sure you are getting the most mentally stable dog you can possibly get and read some of the puppy threads on here....would GSD puppy antics make your anxiety worse? If so, there are easier puppies to raise than a gsd.

And if you do get a GSD enlist someone who doesn't have anxiety to help with socialization/exposure to the world so your puppy does not develop a flawed world view


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## astrovan2487 (May 29, 2014)

I would not say that having anxiety would make a GSD a bad dog for you, it's all about finding the right dog and having time and energy to put into training. Find a breeder that specializes in therapy or service dogs and explain to them your situation and the kind of dog you want. Do not get a cheap, backyard bred "pet" dog. A calm, confident, handler focused dog could do wonders for you, that being said, if you get a high strung, nervy dog with no off switch it could make your anxiety worse and the dog could cause problems like your family mentioned. If you don't have much time to spend training the dog, it would not be a good idea to get a GSD. Training builds confidence for both you and your dog and is a continual thing, training is not ever "complete" really. I have anxiety and my dog has really helped me a lot. I used to avoid any kind of social stuff outside of work but now we go to dog training and dog related events all the time and enjoy interacting with people. Situations that used to be stressful are now enjoyable with her around. It takes a lot of the pressure and focus off you and you can focus on the dog if things get to be uncomfortable. Honestly with 3 kids under 5 I would not consider a GSD, even if you have time to dedicate to training. Young boys are unpredictable and very physical, not many dogs like that, I would wait till your kids are older.


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## DutchKarin (Nov 23, 2013)

Here are my thoughts for what it is worth.

You have 3 kids under 5, that is going to create enough chaos and anxiety for you for awhile. Adding a puppy to that mix is going to be very hard and very anxiety provoking and very distracting. I personally think the puppy will suffer because puppies bite, pee, bark, etc... and your kids are going to hear you yell, cry, and be anxious. Focus on your kids, teach them about animals, all that is good but wow, unless you don't work and are there to manage a very busy situation and changing constantly with the ages of your kids, I would really wait. Think about you modeling for your kids. Do you want to model chaos and uncontrolled situations. Or thoughtful ones.

Regarding a service dog. They just don't magically become service dogs. It takes finding the right dog and have a very good trainer (typically expensive) to help train a dog as an anxiety assist dog. I personally think many GSDs could do that job but many also do not have the nerves for it. So in the ideal, you find the trainer first and they help you find the right dog. 

I wish you well but I would create the ideal situation for your 3 kids and for managing your anxiety and enjoy other people's dogs right now until those kids are all in school.


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

For the record I don't think the OP is even looking for a service dog? I only brought it up because so many service dog trainers say no GSDs for PTSD because of the issue he stated.


I have never heard of anyone say a person shouldn't have a pet GSD due to anxiety but have been part of quite a few discussions of GSDs as PTSD service dogs.


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## Elsieb (Apr 9, 2014)

Maybe consider a young dog but not a puppy. We got Z when he was 13 months old, old enough for the trainer/importer to see the temperament and trained enough to be easily brought into our life. At that age he was certainly puppyish enough for another year. Good luck finding your perfect friend!


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## Deb (Nov 20, 2010)

Personally, with three children under five and anxiety problems I wouldn't recommend a puppy at this time. And sadly, not a GSD puppy. Puppies bite, they go the bathroom on the floor where you're toddlers are likely to play. If you have a baby and it's at the age where everything goes in the mouth.... Puppies chases, they grad pants legs, socks and shirts that are still on the children. If the kids run, the puppy thinks is play and chases, often nipping. Puppies steal food out of children's hands, not always gently. Especially not gently with a German Shepherd puppy. Children will ramp up a puppy and the puppy will ramp up the children and that equals chaos at times. I've been there and done that. All of this is likely to ramp up your anxieties. 


My suggestion would be to go to a Lab rescue and rescue an adult Lab that is known for loving children and being patient. You will find that just sitting and petting him or her will help you to calm down. I wouldn't be surprised to find out your Lab began to pick up on when you were feeling anxious and automatically come to you and help you calm yourself. Later on when your children are older and able to help you, no longer dependent on you for everything, then start looking into getting a German Shepherd. I think at that time you will be able to bond easier and be able to train your Shepherd to be what you want him to be. 


The best of luck to you and even if you don't get a Shepherd, please do tell us what you get and how it's working for you! And of course pictures!


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## LuvShepherds (May 27, 2012)

There are calm GSDs that don't run to type. I had a WGSL from a puppy with young children, who was solid as a rock. We lucked into finding a good breeder who understood dogs and children. Mine were older than yours, though, and it was not my first GSD. I would suggest meeting with a rescue group. They will send someone to your house to meet your family and look it over. They could look for a dog that would fit your needs. I suggest a dog over three years old because they calm down by then if they are going to. If they have a dog with a known history that was raised with children, has good nerves and temperament and has been socialized to people and dogs, see if you can take the dog home and try it out. A good rescue will take a dog back if it's not a match. You won't want an extremely protective dog, or high drive. If you are willing to wait for the right dog, you could find one. Learn the breed and once your children are school age then consider adding a puppy. In my personal experience, those little lap dogs people recommend for children are less tolerant of being poked and prodded by children and are more likely to snap.


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

We adopted a GSD mix when he was about age 3. He was the one who couldn't care less about emotionally charged situations. He was a rock. Was exactly who and what he was no matter what was going on.

He had some other issues but...what the OP is concerned about was definitely not one of them. I couldn't say for sure what he was mixed with. Maybe some lab.


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## Dnr2d09 (Oct 12, 2016)

Rescues are excellent resources in finding a dog best suited for you. I have a golden retriever and would recommend the breed to anyone. These dogs require basic training and structure like all dogs do, but they are trainable, loving, and all around fantastic dogs. 

Like you, I've always been taken with GSDs and very much wanted one. I adopted an 11 month old from a local rescue and though I loved him dearly, he had no off switch whatsoever. He was rowdy, he was anxious (especially about lights, once he figured out our phones had flashlights, you could just be holding the phone and he'd run up and snap at it. Not aggressively, but annoying nonetheless.) He wasn't a bad dog by any stretch of the imagination, in fact he was loving and loyal and I don't regret having him, but he was work with a capital W. He eventually developed a habit of bolting and was hit by a car which all but destroyed me. 

That was almost a year ago. I recently started looking into breeders in and around my area and found a good one. I had intended to get a younger dog, but when I told the breeder what I was looking for, he offered to let me meet an 8 month old he had (the buyer backed out at 10 weeks old so he had decided to keep him) and it was love at first sight. He's everything I could've asked for and then some. The breeder definitely picked well for me. That's just to say there's no reason to abandon what you really want, just be very honest about your thresholds and expectations. Had I known my first boy would be so difficult to train and ultimately how it would end, I might have thought twice about keeping him only because I feel I failed him by not keeping him safe.

Research, research, research. Not sure of your location, but look into Cher Car Kennels. I wasn't able to afford one of their puppies but the co owner of that kennel is a wealth of knowledge and has great resources on her website.


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