# Getting a puppy. . . feeling guilty and conflicted



## Emoore (Oct 9, 2002)

I've been a rescuer since 2003 and have fostered many, many GSDs and helped them find new forever homes. Something inside me broke when Cash died. Honestly I think people on this board are some of the only people on earth who can understand how much I love that dog. I've had 3 fosters since then and I'm finding that whatever I had that allowed me to do this well, I just don't have anymore, not to mention that Rocky at 8 1/2 doesn't think it's nearly as fun as he did when he was 4. 

I can't stop thinking about puppies. I think about them during the day and dream about them at night. A lot of times I'll dream that I have Cash as a puppy, which of course I never got to see because he came from the shelter. Sometimes I dream that he's playing with a puppy in my yard. 

So we've pretty much decided to get a well-bred working-line pup from a reputable breeder, but now I feel guilty. Is this ok? Does the karma I've accumulated through my rescue work give me a pass to buy a puppy? Or am I going to feel guilty every time I look at my new dog?


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## ba1614 (Feb 17, 2010)

I'd say you get whatever pup you want, and love that sucker like it sounds you will.


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## GSDBESTK9 (Mar 26, 2002)

I would not feel guilty, you have helped many dogs and probably will continue to do so even if you get a puppy.


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## Emoore (Oct 9, 2002)

GSDBESTK9 said:


> I would not feel guilty, you have helped many dogs and probably will continue to do so even if you get a puppy.


Yes, I probably won't foster while the pup is young but will continue to support the rescue financially and with home visits, running applications, etc.


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## clearcreekranch (Mar 18, 2010)

Don't feel guilty....you have and I am sure will continue to do more than most people do in their lifetime. I have rescues and always have purebred animals too. Smile and be happy to give another puppy a home.


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

I think getting a puppy is a fantastic idea. 

Thank you for all of the work you do, thank you for helping all of those dogs, thank you for showing them love while they were with you.

Get your puppy, raise him/her, train him/her, enjoy him/her, love him/her, and when your ready you can always foster again.

:hugs:


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## Cassidy's Mom (Mar 30, 2003)

Emoore said:


> So we've pretty much decided to get a well-bred working-line pup from a reputable breeder, but now I feel guilty. Is this ok? Does the karma I've accumulated through my rescue work give me a pass to buy a puppy? Or am I going to feel guilty every time I look at my new dog?


I hope that you can find a way to let the guilt go. There's nothing wrong with buying a puppy from a reputable breeder - it's not like you're supporting a BYB or a puppy mill. There is something special about having a dog that you raised from puppyhood, from being involved through all stages of development and training. If that's what you want, you should go for it, and you don't need to apologize to anyone for that.


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## Courtney (Feb 12, 2010)

I'm really sorry to hear about your boy Cash-it's obvious how much you loved him.

I think it's normal to feel the way you do about purchasing a puppy from a breeder vs adopting from a rescue or shelter. It's very obvious that you are very passionate about rescuing-not only do "you talk the talk, you walk the walk" by fostering, etc.

So yes it normal to feel guilty BUT absolutley fine to find the line of dog your looking for from a great breeder.

Good luck on your search and puppy fever is powerful!!!


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## MIGSD (Aug 10, 2010)

I think you're GREAT. We do foster work, but purchased a puppy. :wub: we wanted to pick from the litter, get our family dog as a pup. We wanted to bond very closely with our pup, not to say that you can't do that with a shelter/rescue dog but for us we WANTED a puppy, and its ok


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## Stosh (Jun 26, 2010)

I agree 100%- get a puppy! Nothing will help heal your heart better than a little fuzz ball with puppy breath. The dream of Cash playing with a puppy in the yard seems like a message from him and he will be out there playing with both of you.


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## Castlemaid (Jun 29, 2006)

Stosh said:


> I agree 100%- get a puppy! Nothing will help heal your heart better than a little fuzz ball with puppy breath. The dream of Cash playing with a puppy in the yard seems like a message from him and he will be out there playing with both of you.



I think Stosh is right! And everyone else is right too!

I've only had two dogs before Gryff - both adopted from a local shelter. Never would I have thought that I would EVER _buy_ a dog, and thus create a void for more "breeders" (of the Back Yard and Commercial variety) to fill with more puppies. 

But it is okay to change. It is okay to have different wants and goals for yourself and for your new dog. And it is okay to just go for what you would like, and going about it responsibly, as you are doing. 

The karma is, that all the dogs that you saved and helped find peace, happiness, love? They are giving that peace, happiness, love back to you with the very special pup you dream about.


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## Stogey (Jun 29, 2010)

Puppy ! Puppy ! Puppy !


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## JazzNScout (Aug 2, 2008)

Emoore said:


> So we've pretty much decided to get a well-bred working-line pup from a reputable breeder, but now I feel guilty. Is this ok? Does the karma I've accumulated through my rescue work give me a pass to buy a puppy? Or am I going to feel guilty every time I look at my new dog?


Yes, I think your karma quotient is good 

Another alternative you have is to adopt a puppy. I lucked out with Layla -- I "saved" her off of Craigslist as she was heading out to some buyer who had called the owner and didn't ask a question about her. Layla, from 8 - 12 weeks, was living in 1/2 crate about 20 hours a day, soiling her crate and herself, and then clearly getting whacked for it. Dumb people.

BUT ... there are also puppies at rescues.

Whatever you decide, you've done enough good work. :hug:


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## Emoore (Oct 9, 2002)

Yeah, I know there are puppies in rescue, I've fostered one myself. BUT, I want a well-bred, working-line pup and the odds of one of _those_ turning up in rescue are slim. Not to mention that rescue pups are neutered at 12-14 weeks and I'd rather wait until a year old or so.


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## Samba (Apr 23, 2001)

I really think you should get the puppy. You will love him and not abandon him and that is the main thing! 

I have had several rescues over the years. Great dogs many of them. Some have gone on to homes and three live here currently.

I also have carefully purchased dogs. I can not imagine life without them either. I love my latest working line male and he appears to carry some affection for me! 

Guilt is probably not serving you well in this matter at all!


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## Jason L (Mar 20, 2009)

My two older ones are from the local shelters and my youngest one was purchased from a breeder. My preference will always be to adopt a dog than to buy one but I don't think there is anything necessarily wrong or unethical about buying a dog - as long as the decision is carefully thought out and the dog is properly cared for and love, like Samba said. 

I think in your case a puppy will do you good. Besides, I am sucker for working line GSDs!!


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

There is nothing wrong with having rescue dogs *and* well bred dogs.

I have a co worker, they love the Keeshond breed, they always have 2 dogs at a time, they get their Keeshond puppy from a reputable breeder and then they adopt a puppy or an adult mixed breed dog from a shelter. They've done this for over 30 years!


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## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

Consider this; perhaps "Karma" is trying to tell you through your dreams that there is the perfect puppy out there for you...from a breeder just waiting for you to find him/her. Follow your heart.....find him/her, they are waiting......


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## lizzkatris (Apr 29, 2010)

I don't think you need to "justify" getting a puppy. If that's what you want then you should do it. Especially from a reputable breeder. You are supporting a responsible breeding program where their dogs aren't the ones ending up in shelters. I think there are a lot of people who foster, but have also purchased a dog for themselves. We understand!! Good luck deciding what's best for you!


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## JakodaCD OA (May 14, 2000)

I also think everyone is right on here, I have/had rescues, but the majority of my dogs were /are bought from breeders. 

Sometimes I to, feel guilty thinking about all those wonderful dogs that "need" a home vs me "wanting" one from a breeder. In the end, I know I've done my part for rescue (as you have MORE than done yours), don't feel guilty, get that puppy of your dreams and everything else will fall into place


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## vat (Jul 23, 2010)

I do not think I can say it better than everyone else here has done. It sounds like you have been an angel to many and now karma is paying you back. Your dreams are telling you what your heart really wants. Do it, do not feel guilty you are not buying from a puppy mill.

I do not doubt that fosters will come back into your life but it sounds like for right this minute you need to do something for you and you deserve it.


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## chicagojosh (Jun 22, 2010)

Emoore,

Look at it this way...You getting a GSD as a pup will prevent a GSD from having to go through the fostering, rehoming, rescue kennel stuff. 

Whether your "rescuing" him at 8 weeks or after someone else has messed him up, you are still rescuing to a good life.


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## Jessiewessie99 (Mar 6, 2009)

Don't worry your not alone on feeling guilty about going to a breeder. Even though I am not getting a puppy for a while I am still nervous about doing it. I volunteer at a shelter and know all those dogs I want.

But in the end you supporting a good breeder, so you know you are doing good. You are going to get good karma for what you have done. Who said you can't continue rescuing/adopting dogs and buy from a reptuable breeder?


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## Stosh (Jun 26, 2010)

Sounds unanimous! Think of all the puppy stuff you were never able to do with Cash that you'll be able to do with this new pup. After all the good you've done, and will continue to do, you deserve this chance. You deserve all that puppy love and for once give yourself the opportunity to receive it instead of being the one always giving. Let Cash send one your way. It took me so long to get a puppy after I lost our last gsd but I put Omy's little red puppy collar that I had saved on the new one and we went out for a walk on the property. The new pup found an old toy that Omy had buried at the base of a tree and had been there for years, almost as though she left it for the next one. It was just great! Sad but sweet


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## Elaine (Sep 10, 2006)

I've been fostering dogs for a lot of years now and I went to a breeder for my last dog because I wanted a very specific dog for competition sports and I wanted to improve my chances of a long term healthy dog. I've had four pre-owned dogs over the years, in addition to new puppies, but I wanted such a specific dog that I couldn't get from rescue. I don't feel at all bad and still foster.

If you want a puppy from a good breeder, get one. You can return to rescue at another time if you choose.


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## AgileGSD (Jan 17, 2006)

Not sure what is wrong with wanting a well bred puppy. Without breeders selecting for proper breed characteristics, the essence of what the GSD has always been would eventually end up being totally lost. There is a lot to be said for getting a puppy from a known background and being able to raise the puppy to fit into your life from the start. I'm all for getting rescue dogs too but IMO there is no right or wrong when one is considering a rescue or a well bred puppy.


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## Taylor (Apr 7, 2009)

Emily, I think its a great idea. I know how much you loved Cash. Whatever pup you get will be one lucky pup!! Good luck to you!


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

It sounds like the shelter/rescue movement can effectively manipulate people and give them guilt trips. 

Ok, here is the question, have you EVER guilted someone into rescuing who was set on going to a good breeder? (pet stores do not count.)

Ok, here is another question, have you ever dissed someone for going to a breeder instead of rescuing? 

If you have said yes to either of these questions, maybe you should reconsider the breeder thing. 

If not, I cannot see any reason you should not choose where to get youre next puppy.


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## Emoore (Oct 9, 2002)

No. I've worked to get people to consider rescue if it didn't seem like they'd given it thought or consideration and I've tried hard to steer people away from bybs and pet shops. I'm not above showing pictures of the horrible conditions in some puppy mills or guilt tripping someone who wants to breed their pretty shepherd to the one down the street, but I've never dissed anyone who was going to a reputable breeder. I have a lot of respect for good breeders.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

you have no reason to feel quilty! none whatsoever!!! You've put in time helping other animals, getting a puppy for YOU is not a bad idea. They still need homes rescues or not right? You'll love him just as much as a rescue.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

No guilt! Go get your puppy. 

Just because we rescue doesn't mean we can't go pick out what we want once in awhile.  You aren't the reason we have to rescue so you have no reason to feel guilty.


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## bianca (Mar 28, 2010)

I totally agree with everyone else here, after all you have done and may at some stage continue to do for rescues, there should be no guilt in wanting a pup. I hope you can find a way to ease your uncertainty :hugs:


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

bianca said:


> I totally agree with everyone else here, after all you have done and may at some stage continue to do for rescues, there should be no guilt in wanting a pup. I hope you can find a way to ease your uncertainty :hugs:


:thumbup:


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## JakodaCD OA (May 14, 2000)

and now that we have hopefully convinced you to go for that puppy of your dreams! When are you getting him?


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## Jason L (Mar 20, 2009)

And where are you getting him?


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## Emoore (Oct 9, 2002)

I dunno, I'm looking at some breeders with litters either just born or coming soon. I'll keep you posted.


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

Emoore said:


> I dunno, I'm looking at some breeders with litters either just born or coming soon. I'll keep you posted.


Congrats and good luck!


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## Stosh (Jun 26, 2010)

When you get one, we'll come and visit! Happy hunting


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## Jason L (Mar 20, 2009)

I'm in the same town as you so if you ever want to try Schutzhund with your new pup, let me know. Good luck with your puppy search!!


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## G-burg (Nov 10, 2002)

> So we've pretty much decided to get a well-bred working-line pup from a reputable breeder, but now I feel guilty. Is this ok?


I think that sounds like a wonderful idea!! Everyone "once in a while" we have to do things for ourselves.. And if getting a puppy from a decent breeder is that "once in a while thing" then I say you owe it to yourself! No need to feel guilty.


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## Liesje (Mar 4, 2007)

I've had the same feelings, mostly it's others that make me feel guilty. But then I think of all the cats and my heart dog that were rescues. My Schutzhund/sport dogs...I would not have other dogs if not them, if that makes sense. It's not like a shelter dog died when I got Nikon, it was Nikon or bust. Likewise with my working line puppy. That's really all I'm interested in, a working line with a specific temperament. If I hadn't found one, I just wouldn't be getting another dog. I don't feel guilty anymore because most of the people making me feel guilty are not actively involved in rescue themselves. I walked dogs at the shelter, did home visit for the GSD rescue, pulled some GSDs for rescue, I always advocate for rescue first, I've rescued cats and fostered cats. I have done and will continue to do my share regardless of where my sport dogs come from.


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## Navah (Aug 10, 2010)

Don’t feel guilty. I went through the exact same situation as you except I never wanted a puppy. Rescuing and fostering many animals through two decades of my life had left me mentally and financially drained. The health issues of the rescues from backyard breeder and the mental issues from being abused had taken a toll on me. I needed a little break. So it took a year before I finally decided to purchase a dog that I could raise mentally sound and came from a healthy bloodline. It was a year of pure guilt for even thinking the thought, but I have never regretted my decision.

Do I still feel guilty? Yes.. Sometimes. But when I do my boyfriend always reminds me that I am just one person, I can’t save the world and I have done more than most. That’s makes me feel better. I love my unrescued dog but I still have three rescued cats and a rescued Shepherd/Dobie. I’ll go back to rescuing one day, but like you, I needed to do something for me. 

Go and get your puppy, you deserve it for being such a wondering and caring person. And thank you for being so kind.


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## Shadow's mum (Mar 13, 2010)

Perhaps it should be called Karma


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## shannonrae (Sep 9, 2010)

I have owned 5 dogs in my life. Four were rescues, one is from a breeder. For some reason I felt I had to get my Pomeranian from a breeder. I think it a because while I love little dogs their personality sometimes leaves much to be desired! By getting a pup from a breeder I made sure both parents had a temperament I was looking for and the little guy (Kobie) was raised with big dogs and behaves a such. When I take my dogs to the boat dock to go swimming you can bet Kobie jumps off into the water just like the big dogs.
He is not "yappy" nor does he have a mean bone in his body. Absolutely the sweetest and best natured dog you ill ever meet. Its not a bad idea to go to a breeder if you are looking or something specific.


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## CaseysGSD (Oct 15, 2010)

I think a puppy is a great idea, it sounds like you have a lot of love in your heart to give and maybe your current feelings about the fosters and about adopting one of them are due to the fact that your Cash who you loved so dearly was a foster and you think in the back of your mind that the reason you may have not had him longer was due to the fact of not being "well bred"

I think what ever you chose is a GREAT choice and you are a wonderful person with a beautiful heart!


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## codmaster (Aug 5, 2009)

Emoore said:


> Yes, I probably won't foster while the pup is young but will continue to support the rescue financially and with home visits, running applications, etc.


 
Go for the puppy! 

Sounds like the new pup will be one lucky little guy (or girl!). You have done way more than most and it sounds like you will continue to aid rescues!


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## mroutdoorsman (Oct 4, 2010)

Cassidy's Mom said:


> I hope that you can find a way to let the guilt go. There's nothing wrong with buying a puppy from a reputable breeder - it's not like you're supporting a BYB or a puppy mill. There is something special about having a dog that you raised from puppyhood, from being involved through all stages of development and training. If that's what you want, you should go for it, and you don't need to apologize to anyone for that.


So true on letting that guilt go. You need to try on letting that go before you get the puppy so you can be that calm assertive and happy pack leader that your puppy will be looking for in you. If you still feel that guilt with the puppy the puppy will feed off of how you feel and not be a balanced and calm and submissive dog.


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## Larien (Sep 26, 2010)

I was in the same situation. My beloved Great Dane died on August 9th, and I was completely and utterly devastated, my world was over, I didn't want to go on. When people would say, "just get another one," I got angry. When I went to pick up Scout's ashes at the ER vet clinic, there was a cardboard sign on the counter for the ASPCA - featuring a picture of a GSD puppy. I remember in my heartache, it's cute face made me smile, and remember how I've always said I'd love to have a GSD "one day."

But actually getting there was harder, it was about a month before I started casually browsing paper ads. And when I did, I felt guilty: would I be betraying Scout by getting a puppy? Would I be disrespectful to his memory if some new dog slept on his side of the bed or drank from his water bowl? At first, I really wrestled with this and went back and forth. I was still on the fence when I was casually emailing breeders for pictures of any available males, having done my research I knew what I wanted in a GSD. But when I got the email back from Remi's breeder, with that pic of his little face seeming to smile, I knew he was mine. Perhaps Scout had sent him to me to bring me happiness again (Remi was born very shortly after Scout passed).

I still miss Scout terribly, and I think about him all the time. But Remi brought some light back into my life, and it will be fun raising up another big boy again, having years of adventure together. It's a beautiful thing, dog rearing.. It goes by far too fast, but the unconditional love and joy they bring is worth it, always. Do what your heart tells you and if it has room for another baby, bring one home. Best of luck to you!


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## Katey (Aug 11, 2010)

It's clear how much you love your boy, and I am so sad that you lost him. And I am so glad there are people like you who have been dedicated to rescues! Sounds to me like it's definitely time for you to get a pup. 

I'm no expert, but I think of acquiring a puppy from a breeder as actually doing a great thing for the breed; by going through a reputable breeder, you are working with that breeder to improve the quality and richness of the German Shepherd Dog breed. Without homes for these pups, and people interested in owning and raising a pup, the GSD would not be the strong breed it is today. It's a different sort of way to help the breed than rescuing, but it is still important. 

Now go get yourself a puppy, love him up good, and post lots of pictures!!


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## Wolfenstein (Feb 26, 2009)

I'm definitely feeling some of the same things these days, and I've been struggling with getting a GSD puppy myself. I always said I'd only get a dog from a breeder if I were planning on starting a kennel of my own and needed foundation stock. Until then, I'd get my rescues. However, that dream of starting a kennel has been pushed back and looks like it won't happen for possibly another decade. In the mean time, we're at the point where we can take on a second dog. I started by looking at rescues, but I know specifically we want a GSD this go around, and I keep going back to the health issues. I have seen far too many GSDs suffering early on in life, including my in-laws' dog, and I know I can avoid this by going with a great breeder. I also would like to try out competitive obedience, tracking, and possibly Schutzhund with my next dog, and I know (with good reason) there are rules in our local GSD rescues that their dogs can't be used for Schutzhund training. Besides, you never know what you're going to get with a rescue as opposed to a well established and tracked line of dogs.

I'm not going to lie, I still feel guilty at times about the decision to go with a breeder. However, like you said, we're still going to contribute to rescues whenever and however we can.


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## IllinoisNative (Feb 2, 2010)

Don't feel guilty. I know, easier said than done.

I'm also in rescue. My last two dogs were rescued puppies. But I still dream of owing my very own Black Sable working-line pup. He's my "dream dog." I don't feel guilty about that because I continue to rescue, own rescues, do home checks, fostering, volunteering, etc. Having my own GSD doesn't take away all the good I do in terms of my rescue work. I can do both...and so can you.

I think we're all prone to guilt. I felt guilty getting my new puppy after my last dog died. And they were both rescues...lol. I also feel guilty because I'm a better dog owner with the dogs I have now than I was back then. I'm just a chronic guilt sufferer. Such is my lot in life. LOL.


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## gypsyrose (Nov 22, 2010)

i had the same problems deciding in the end i wanted a puppy and who is to say that Gypsy was'nt rescued from some unscruplous puppy mill when i bought her. the price i paid for her i consider rescue money because i know she'll not be miss treated or alowed to get under a car tire and she will always have a warm place to sleep which she dident have last winter.


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