# What do you say?



## Deb (Nov 20, 2010)

I understand employees asking what service your dog does for you. But what do you say to the general public? That's still kind of personal information. Are you required to answer them with what the dog does for you?


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## eddie1976E (Nov 7, 2010)

I thought that they can't ask. Which results in people who don't have true service dogs claiming they are service dogs.


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## Chip18 (Jan 11, 2014)

Deb said:


> I understand employees asking what service your dog does for you. But what do you say to the general public? That's still kind of personal information. Are you required to answer them with what the dog does for you?


 My answer ... only as a a member of the "community of responsible dog owners" ... would be that depends on you. If you feel it's "worthwhile" to help educate a given individual then you should feel free to share as much or as little personal information as you see fit.


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## Deb (Nov 20, 2010)

Employees can ask. I have no problem with them asking, that's their job. But it's the general public. Some dogs are trained if their handler is about to have a panic attack, or PTSD dogs who if the handler starts to have a flashback will guide the handler out of the store or where they are. Generally if I have Demi out for training I say for balance, which she does. I have to have a buggy with me otherwise if the aisles are crowded and tall. But my son shouldn't have to say what she is to the general public. I was the one who trained Demi to separate - the command- once at the commissary when I suddenly was starting to black out. I'm told it was amazing to watch her pull me through the crowd to the door and out. Two vets came with me and made sure I was all right. It's embarrassing. No way to say it isn't. But that's not something you want to say you have, nor should you to the general public. I rarely have a problem, the separate command was not for me, even though I needed it that day. But if the general public asks, what do you say? If you don't answer then it does look like you have a fake service dog. I've been saying I don't have to answer, only to store employees, and as politely as I can. It doesn't go over well.


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## Deb (Nov 20, 2010)

_I was the one who trained Demi to separate - the command- once at the commissary when I suddenly was starting to black out. I'm told it was amazing to watch her pull me through the crowd to the door and out. Two vets came with me and made sure I was all right. It's embarrassing._

Sorry, wrote that wrong. I trained her to the command to separate. But I once had to use it for real.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

I don't have a disability, other than a variety of health concerns, that no one can see and for which I do not use a dog. So I don't get this question. 

People will ask things that are none of their business, and while you can ignore them or tell them flat out that it is none of your business, I don't think it is helpful to service dogs and their owners in general to promote animosity. 

You can use it as a teaching moment, by saying something like, "I'm sorry, the service the dog performs is personal, like health is personal." 

I mean, one of the reasons dogs are great for emotional support, is because people can accept complements or converse with perfect strangers when it is about the dog. There is a freedom associated with dogs. You would pet someone's dog much quicker than giving a friendly pat to their kid's head. 

Dogs are amazing, and seeing a service dog in person when we have seen them on specials on tv and such, well, they are an attractive nuisance. I saw a special on dogs that sniff out cancer, and I've seen other dogs used for cadavers. Yeah, I would probably ask if I saw a dog in the exam room, is that a medical dog? What does he do? Does he sniff out cancer? 

For stangers who have a service dog vest on their dogs, or have a dog in a grocery store, I think most of us have been taught to not pet, and try not to notice, so we don't make people uncomfortable. The thing is, not seeing disabled people is just another way of noticing them and making them uncomfortable. So I don't know.


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## Chip18 (Jan 11, 2014)

Deb said:


> Employees can ask. I have no problem with them asking, that's their job. But it's the general public. Some dogs are trained if their handler is about to have a panic attack, or PTSD dogs who if the handler starts to have a flashback will guide the handler out of the store or where they are. Generally if I have Demi out for training I say for balance, which she does. I have to have a buggy with me otherwise if the aisles are crowded and tall. But my son shouldn't have to say what she is to the general public. I was the one who trained Demi to :hug: - the command- once at the commissary when I suddenly was starting to black out. I'm told it was amazing to watch her pull me through the crowd to the door and out. Two vets came with me and made sure I was all right. It's embarrassing. No way to say it isn't. But that's not something you want to say you have, nor should you to the general public. I rarely have a problem, the separate command was not for me, even though I needed it that day. But if the general public asks, what do you say? If you don't answer then it does look like you have a fake service dog. I've been saying I don't have to answer, only to store employees, and as politely as I can. It doesn't go over well.


 Well first let me say ... "sorry you have this issue." 

But "separate command??" That is freaking awesome!!! :laugh2:

So the dog was doing that with two "Strangers accompanying the two of you???" Color me freaking impressed!!!!!!!! Man .... that is a "Dog/GSD" to be proud of!! 

OK well this info helps to better frame your question. Your dog's demeanor would speak for itself (apparently) and if you feel the need to answer it need not go beyond "PTSD." On a case by case basis if you care to answer. Beyond that your engaging in a futile battle ... kinda like this:









Yes it's easy for me to say "disregard the haters" ...but that is what you need to do. As they say ... "You can't fix stupid!" Some people aren't worth wasting your time on. :smile2:


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## newlie (Feb 12, 2013)

I don't think there is anything wrong with saying politely "It's something personal that I really can't discuss, but thanks for your concern." Personally, I would not dream of asking someone why they have a service dog because it's none of my business. The same goes for people who park in handicapped parking spaces. I've seen several things on Facebook lately where people feel entitled to leave nasty notes on cars addressed to people that don't "look" handicapped. People who do this kind of thing are nothing but cowards and you can believe me that I would say it to their face if I ever caught one in the act. Who died and made these people watchdogs for service dog trickery or parking lot police? It's none of their business. (I would underline this if I knew how.) Just assume that the person in question has some disability that you can't see and be done with it.

However, I do think anyone would be perfectly within their rights to complain if a so-called service dog is out of control, endangering other people or being allowed to do things that are not hygienic. That's a completely different story. I also see nothing wrong with asking a business if a dog is in an exam room what the purpose is.


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## Fodder (Oct 21, 2007)

"Is that a service dog"
"What task is the dog trained to perform"

Those are the only questions that are allowed to be asked.... that said, if you cannot explain the dogs training without revealing your disability then you do have that right of privacy but the expectation is that you say so "it's personal and I cannot say without revealing my condition" or "s/he alerts me to a medical condition that I prefer not to reveal" or something like that...


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

People are so clueless. Would you walk up to someone and ask "why are you in a wheelchair?"

My response is "that's personal and I prefer not to discuss it", at which time people are generally appropriately embarassed and apologetic.

I had a guy walk up to me in a library once, wave his hand in front of my face and say "you're not blind", then to someone ekse "she's not blind!" My husband had words with him lol.


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## Fodder (Oct 21, 2007)

My apologies... "expectation" was a poor choice of words in this context. I was thinking of buisiness owners and the like. If it were the general public, personally I'd probably leave it at "that's private".


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

If the person seems nice and I am in a good mood I do have a PR version of my dog's job that I can say without revealing too much about myself. Sometimes I will even answer with a general statement like "service dogs can be trained to assist with many medical conditions, such as....."

Lots of times people have assumed I am training her for someone else and I just smile. They say "it must be so hard to let her go when training is over" smile.


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## Chip18 (Jan 11, 2014)

newlie said:


> I don't think there is anything wrong with saying politely "It's something personal that I really can't discuss, but thanks for your concern." Personally, I would not dream of asking someone why they have a service dog because it's none of my business. The same goes for people who park in handicapped parking spaces. I've seen several things on Facebook lately where people feel entitled to leave nasty notes on cars addressed to people that don't "look" handicapped. People who do this kind of thing are nothing but cowards and you can believe me that I would say it to their face if I ever caught one in the act. Who died and made these people watchdogs for service dog trickery or parking lot police? It's none of their business.* (I would underline this if I knew how.)* Right above the text box are formating options. *You highlight the text you want turns blue and click your choices and release.  *You Just assume that the person in question has some disability that you can't see and be done with it.


I'm not so presumption as to tag someone cars. But yes your are correct not all disabilities are visible. The vehicle should have a window tag visible on the inside or a disability symbol on the licence plate for the obsessively thorough busybodies! p


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## Chip18 (Jan 11, 2014)

Thecowboysgirl said:


> People are so clueless. Would you walk up to someone and ask "why are you in a wheelchair?"
> 
> My response is "that's personal and I prefer not to discuss it", at which time people are generally appropriately embarrassed and apologetic.
> 
> I had a guy walk up to me in a library once, wave his hand in front of my face and say "you're not blind", then to someone else "she's not blind!" My husband had words with him lol.


The phrase that comes to mind ... "is what the heck is wrong with people???" 

I suppose it speaks well for my parents that I am still actually surprised at how heartless, ignorant and flat clueless some people can be??? 

SMH and yeah sorry that happened.


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## newlie (Feb 12, 2013)

Chip18 said:


> I'm not so presumption as to tag someone cars. But yes your are correct not all disabilities are visible. The vehicle should have a window tag visible on the inside or a disability symbol on the licence plate for the obsessively thorough busybodies! p


Thanks for the tip on underlining, Chip!

In the several that I have seen, the handicapped sticker was displayed, but because the folks did not "look" handicapped, these geniuses decided that they must be beating the system. (Really, how dare they make me take two more steps than them! I will write a nasty note calling them all kinds of names and stick it on their car for everyone to see, that will show them! Of course, it goes without saying that I won't leave my name, address or phone number...)


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## WembleyDogsUK (Jul 13, 2016)

I don;t think such question is kind, though could be asked politely, it is designed to alienate. And, the rule is? To turn your face away.


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## Chip18 (Jan 11, 2014)

newlie said:


> Thanks for the tip on underlining, Chip!


 Aww you should have showed your new found skill off! 




newlie said:


> *In the several that I have seen, the handicapped sticker was displayed, but because the folks did not "look" handicapped,* these geniuses decided that they must be beating the system. (Really, how dare they make me take two more steps than them! I will write a nasty note calling them all kinds of names and stick it on their car for everyone to see, that will show them! Of course, it goes without saying that I won't leave my name, address or phone number...)


Sign the part in bold ... so they actually went out of there way to verify the vehical is legally parked ... and yet still chose to act like tools. 

Sigh ... yeah I'm doing what I can in the battle against ignorance but that pig ain't singing.


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## carmspack (Feb 2, 2011)

dog? what dog? are you calling my assistant a dog?

--- I truly value the ability of a dog to improve a persons life . I am proud to have produced medical alert dogs, emotional support and assistance dogs for Vets, provided five youngsters which certified guide dogs and more.

In general I think people admire these dogs and are curious about them . 

there are still issues about acceptance into cabs or uber vehicles , still battles to be won.

however ----- lately there are a lot of faux service dogs, poorly or inappropriately selected , self trained , or rushed through training by an organization.

I have seen an unruly black lab who was marking vegetable bins in the local grocery. He was wearing the insignia of a guide/seeing eye (words used in generic definition - I know both are trademarked names and they are NOT the institutions involved) .

what do you do when you take a flight to some destination and you sit beside a therapy - TURKEY , or Tarantula spider, or a boa constrictor. 

I would be apt to ask the question.

The best thing you can say is that the dog allows you to be a full member of society. That's pretty big .


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## ILGHAUS (Nov 25, 2002)

Deb said:


> Employees can ask. I have no problem with them asking, that's their job. ... But if the general public asks, what do you say? If you don't answer then it does look like you have a fake service dog. I've been saying I don't have to answer, only to store employees, and as politely as I can. It doesn't go over well.


To clarify in the U.S. -- you don't have to answer each employee in a business. If you are at a store such as Target, Wal-Mart etc. it is the employee at the front "the greeter" who normally is assigned to this duty. In a restaurant it is usually the person who seats patrons or in a larger restaurant it may be the host or hostess. 

Someone from the general public asks? What would you say to someone who questioned you about any other private matter? What if someone asks in the middle of a store how much you earn? It is none of their business and you have the right to tell them that. Decide what you are going to say and go over it in your mind. Nothing wrong in simply saying, "Excuse me? That is really none of your business." 

As to how it looks to the general public? Show them a well-behaved dog and that is all they need to see. 

On the other hand, if you are chatting with someone and they remark on how beautifully you dog is behaving you also can bring up something that your dog does for you. If you are waiting in line to enter somewhere and a conversation starts then it could be a pleasant way to pass some time if someone asks a general question about SDs. But if you are shopping or trying to enjoy your meal with a group of friends someone disturbing you is just being rude. You decide who you speak with and what the subject is about.

This is one reason that I do not recommend that people put all types of patches on their dog's vest (if the dog wears a vest). Nothing wrong with a patch simply stating *Service Dog* or *Please Do Not Disturb*.


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## ILGHAUS (Nov 25, 2002)

In the U.S., a handler of a SD out in the general public is under Title III of the ADA which is under the authority of the Department of Justice (DOJ). 

Q 7. What questions can a covered entity’s employees ask to determine if a dog is a service
animal?
A: In situations where it is not obvious that the dog is a service animal, staff may ask only
two specific questions: (1) is the dog a service animal required because of a disability? and
(2) what work or task has the dog been trained to perform? Staff are not allowed to request
any documentation for the dog, require that the dog demonstrate its task, or inquire about
the nature of the person’s disability.

_*Frequently Asked Questions about Service Animals and the ADA*
*U.S. Department of Justice*
Civil Rights Division
Disability Rights Section_


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

Ha ha patches....

I have head people read patches out loud as they pet my dog they might begin to stop petting at they finish saying "do not pet". I switched to Do Not Distract patches because people would so often make eye contact with her and say "I wish I could pet you, wudgy wudgy wudgy" another topic that if I have the energy I will explain to people that talking to a service dog distracts it from its handler and could put the handler at risk.

This is one area where if he makes it the male is going to do better than her because he just isn't as interested in people as she has always been. She genuinely likes and enjoys people, strangers included and if she had her choice when they look at her and tell her she is pretty (and believe me she knows what that word means), she would like to go say hi and get petted and hopefully be told more about how pretty she is. One of the joys of her retirement has been getting go go meet people more. If someone talks to him he seems to be thinking "why are you talking to me? I don't know you" 

For the record I have encountered quite a few respectful and knowledgeable parents, whose kids are invariably talking about the dog, wanting to approach the dog ect ect ect, and I hear the parent saying "No, Johnny, that's a helper dog and you can't touch it," and firmly requiring their kids to stay back. These I usually always at least say thank you to as I pass.


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## WembleyDogsUK (Jul 13, 2016)

> You decide who you speak with and what the subject is about


What if the only thing that person wants is you opening your mouth? To hook you? And, telling him off is the very thing he wants?
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blo...-types-emotional-vampires-and-how-escape-them


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## Deb (Nov 20, 2010)

Thank you, everyone. I like the idea of the 'Do Not Disturb' patch. Demi is very friendly and it's one of the things I'm needing to do some retraining on her, to ignore the people who try to call her over or just walk up and want to pet her. My son can't handle the people crowding in on him. They don't realize they're doing it. She does an excellent 'cover me', which is when he stops and she faces the opposite direction he is facing and alerts him to someone coming up to him. But people don't realize she's working when she does this, with the exception of Veterans.


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## Thecowboysgirl (Nov 30, 2006)

I am not 100 percent convinced that any patches really do much good, but I have a big one that says

Service Dog
No Touch
No Talk
No Eye Contact

Except that it is a Cesar quote I like it because it covers basically everything with as few words as possible.

Onr thing about too many patches is it encourages people to stand there and "read" your dog which can then sort of cause its own headaches lol.

Maybe us SD people need to start asking all our local news to do a quick infirmational piece on service dog ettiquette. I have been meaning to make a pamphlet to hand out to whoever almost as long as I have had the dog so I guess it is safe to say at this point I will never get that done lol


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## WateryTart (Sep 25, 2013)

I assumed that certain employees are allowed to ask only the two questions.

For the general public - like another customer - I'd assume it's not illegal but it is definitely rude.


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## Chip18 (Jan 11, 2014)

Deb said:


> Thank you, everyone. I like the idea of the 'Do Not Disturb' patch. Demi is very friendly and it's one of the things I'm needing to do some retraining on her, to ignore the people who try to call her over or just walk up and want to pet her. My son can't handle the people crowding in on him. They don't realize they're doing it. She does an excellent 'cover me', which is when he stops and she faces the opposite direction he is facing and alerts him to someone coming up to him. But people don't realize she's working when she does this, with the exception of Veterans.


And .... I've never see that either but now I know!


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## angelas (Aug 23, 2003)

WembleyDogsUK said:


> What if the only thing that person wants is you opening your mouth? To hook you? And, telling him off is the very thing he wants?
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/blo...-types-emotional-vampires-and-how-escape-them


You don't have to respond to someone just because they want to speak with you. Look through them and walk on.


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