# 14.5 is tooo old!



## Stevenzachsmom (Mar 3, 2008)

We all love the senior GSDs. I used to say that "Seniors are no trouble." That was true when Annie was 9, 10 and 11. She was mellow and regal. The past three years have not been fun - 12, 13 and 14. It's been a downward spiral. The slow progression into degenerating. It has been difficult and sad.

Anyone else ever take care of their grandma? We took care of mine, the last 5 years of her life. The thing we prayed most for was that we would never have to put Grandma in a nursing home. If we had to do that, after taking care of her for so long, it would have been the ultimate defeat.

Well, Annie, has become Granny in a nursing home. At 14.5, there is no enjoyment for us and I can't imagine any for her. She has DM and sometimes just falls over. I often have to pick her up and stand her on her feet. She seems confused. She can lay, stand, or pace. She cannot sit. She just about always poops on the floor. Her vision and hearing are poor. She keeps us up at night with her pacing. I wake up to poop and come home to poop. We don't go on vacation. I lift her rear up the few steps to the front porch. I am always pulling, pushing, and lifting. I get frustrated and lose patience with her. I know it isn't her fault and I feel like pond scum.

On August 17th, I am having surgery. I absolutely cannot lift Annie. My recovery time is 12 weeks. Sure, other family members will do for her - but they aren't here. I am here. I am the primary care giver. Tomorrow, the vet is coming to put Annie to sleep. It is the equivalent of putting Grandma in a nursing home. I have failed. All I can give Annie now, is the chance to go in peace, at home. But I am heartbroken. I prayed so hard that I wouldn't have to do this. Tomorrow is going to be a really bad day.


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## kiya (May 3, 2010)

I am so sorry you have to make that decission. I have been in your shoes too many times myself. I always pray "please dear Lord peacefully in thier sleep, is all I ask". My heart goes out to you, be strong.


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## cassadee7 (Nov 26, 2009)

I am so sorry. I had to let my senior go at 13.5 years. I prayed and prayed he would go in his sleep but I had to give him the gift of freedom from his old mind and body. I think it is a kindness, to let them run free when it is time. I pray for your peace.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

You did not fail. You did not fail yourself. You did not fail her. You gave her 14.5 wonderful years and are freeing her from her failing body. I wish we could be so kind to humans. While I am not a Christian, I do have no doubts there is more to this life than what we have here, and that it is a much larger picture.


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## Caledon (Nov 10, 2008)

I know how you feel. 

Our 14 year old senior was in the same place 6 years ago. Falling, difficulty getting up, losing weight, pooping on the floor. It's a hard decision to reach, but we just know when it is time. They tell us.

You did not fail Annie. 

Sadly, today, we are making the final visit for our 13 year old cat who has been in poor health for a while now and a complete change a few days ago. He is very confused and wanders the house aimlessly.

I will have many tears for my dear Caledon. I will shed tears for Annie too. We do the best for our beloved pets and letting them exit in peace is the hardest and most heartbreaking of them all.


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## rooandtree (May 13, 2012)

you did not fail..you did more than most ever would! i too was in your situation...when the vet looked at me and asked me..how would you feel if you had no control over your BMs and your kids had to clean up after you constantly,thats how he is feeling now...and thats when it hit me that it is actually a blessing to be able to let them go peacefully. you are doing the right thing.


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## Stevenzachsmom (Mar 3, 2008)

Thanks guys. I guess the thing is, Annie could probably go on indefinitely, if I was able to continue her care. I would be willing, if I could. I just can't. 

Annie was 2 years old, when we got her from the pound. My kids were 2, 6, and 10. Now the kids are 14, 18, and 22. They are old enough to make the decision to be here or not. The 22 year old is saying her "good-byes" today. She said she can't do it. The 18 year old will be here. She won't cry. She never does. She will hurt in silence. I wish she wouldn't. I think it will be hardest on my son. He and Annie are the same age. He does not know life without her. He has already had a few meltdowns.

I know in my head, this is the right thing to do. It isn't even about choice. I have no choice. My heart is just in such strong disagreement with my head and my heart hurts. Going to go cry now.


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## Whiteshepherds (Aug 21, 2010)

If Annie could talk she'd probably thank you for making the ultimate unselfish decision. When we had Dakota put down (at home also) the look she gave us really did seem to say "thank you". You've done the best you could and that's more than a lot of people do, don't be too hard on yourself.


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## LoveEcho (Mar 4, 2011)

Oh Jan, I'm so sorry :hugs: I hope the many, many wonderful years you guys had together brings you some comfort. You are NOT doing the wrong thing... you're giving her a graceful, peaceful end rather than pain for both of you. So many good vibes going your way.


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## GatorDog (Aug 17, 2011)

LoveEcho said:


> Oh Jan, I'm so sorry :hugs: I hope the many, many wonderful years you guys had together brings you some comfort. *You are NOT doing the wrong thing... you're giving her a graceful, peaceful end rather than pain for both of you. * So many good vibes going your way.


This is exactly what I would say. You are doing the right thing, and she has had a long and love filled life with you. You will be in my thoughts. :hugs:


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## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

Oh hun, I'm so sorry to see you hurting so. If I knew of some magical way to make you feel better, I'd certainly stop at nothing to do so. 

Never feel you've failed your Annie-girl. 14.5 years of sharing your home, family...life with her could not ever equal failure in any way. 

You've given her everything in life. Now you're providing her dignity with death. 

Super big hugs to you.


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## jang (May 1, 2011)

Dear Jan, I am so sorry you are hurting so badly..Please know you are doing the right thing for Annie and for your family..This time comes to those blessed enough to have a dog for so long..You have given her a good life and if she could talk she would tell you she is tired and wants to go "home'"..Blessings and prayers for your upcoming surgery..please keep in touch with us and let us know how you are..jan


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## Zeeva (Aug 10, 2010)

Bless you. My prayers go out to you and your Annie. You're doing the right thing for her. A long long long LONG time from now she will tell you herself.


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom (Apr 24, 2011)

Stevenand Zach's mom ,my heart goes out to you and your family. It is the last gift we give them even though it hurts like H for us.But it frees them. My thoughts and prayers are w/ you.
Maggi


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## huntergreen (Jun 28, 2012)

op, i haven't the words to help you. if you search for my post "journey is ending" you will see we are going through the same thing. our gsd proudly gave us all they could. now we have to good bye as best and peacefully as we can.


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## cassadee7 (Nov 26, 2009)

Yes, it is hardest on the kids. My kids grew up with mine too. It is so sad to let them go. My youngest made a little basket of dog treats and attached it to balloons a few days after he was gone, and sent the treat basket up to the rainbow bridge for Speedy. We are also going to plant a tree in the yard for him, with his ashes there. Maybe planting something would help your kids too. Hugs.


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## Stosh (Jun 26, 2010)

Annie trusts you to do what's best for her and that's what you're doing. She's a well-loved girl


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

Jan i'm so sorry you've had to make this decision. Annie has had a good life full of love with you. You haven't failed her. You've given her so much. 

I'm here. 

Hugs.


I hope your surgery goes well and you have a smooth recovery.


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## Loneforce (Feb 12, 2012)

You definitely did not fail her shes had a long life with her favorite people. What you are doing is probably the most sincere thing you could do for her. Never second guess yourself on your decision. I know I went through the second guessing and everything, but believe it or not. These people on this site helped me get through tough times. we have all been through it, and know what you are going through.....Run free at the bridge annie.....God Bless :halogsd:


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## Remo (Sep 8, 2004)

There are tears in my eyes just thinking of what you are going through. But please don't be so hard on yourself - you are in no way, shape or form failing her. You are giving her the kind release from a body that is worn out. I agree with Michelle - we should be so kind to our fellow human beings when life comes to the point that there is no joy left and the future will only bring greater pain or suffering than today. 

You have done an amazing thing by just getting her up into that age range. You are setting her free from her earthly aches, pains and indignities. Don't you beat yourself up, even for a single second. You love her enough to do the right thing. It takes great strength, and love, to make that most difficult of decisions. 

Please know that you are in my heart and thoughts.


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## blehmannwa (Jan 11, 2011)

This is such a heartbreak but it is the right thing and the last loving thing that you can do for your dog. I had to put two down last year. I almost felt like they didn't want to hurt me by leaving me and would just keep going. It was up to me to let them go.


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## GatorBytes (Jul 16, 2012)

_"When you come to die may it be after a long life. _
_May you be peaceful and happy and in the presence of those who really care for you. _
_May your going be sheltered and your welcome assured. _
_May your soul smile in the embrace of your anam cara (soul friend)."_

Hugs for you and your doggie at this difficult time.


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## Ilovealldogs (Nov 17, 2006)

A friend once told me in my times of grief to focus on all the happy years that were spent instead of the last moments of life. In some ways, that advice really helped.

I understand what you have been going through especially comparing it to "Granny." My grandmother was in a nursing home in her final years and my father would visit her daily. It was very stressful for him because she was suffering with Alzheimers. She would sometimes forget who he was or would think that he was still a little boy. She became very frail and it was very sad. When she died, my father said he felt a sense of relief; not from obligation, but that she was no longer suffering.

My dog is 15 and I am fortunate that she seems to be doing pretty good. She has a great appetite, still chases squirrels, and her sight is still with her. I look at her every day though almost with a sense of dread because I know that there will be a day when her health will fail and even though I know that, I will still fall apart.

Prayers are with you through this trying time and keep us posted on how you and your family are doing.


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