# Sticky  Looking for Support (lost dog to hemangiosarcoma)



## Klaus My Love

Hello to the forum. I registered in hopes that there may be more loving pet owners with a similar situation and who may be able to direct me to the latest sources of information regarding Hemangiosarcoma. I lost my boy Klaus on Sunday evening to this horrible disease. I brought him into the vet for what I believed to be a stomach issue, only to be told that he was dying of a large tumor that had ruptured in his spleen - and the cause was most certainly HSA. Given the severity and intensity of the bleed, I was forced to decide then and there to opt for surgery or euthanasia. Given how bad the bleed had become, and the poor prognosis, I opted for the later in hopes I spared him any more pain and discomfort. It was the most painful experience I could have been faced with. I have done a considerable amount of research online, in between my moments of complete grief, to comprehend how something like this could have occurred so quickly as he was already being treated regularly for arthritis with blood tests and x-rays - which showed no tumor a month ago. While it appears that this form of cancer is prevalent among shepherds and golden retrievers, it is of little comfort given the lack of time that I was given to say goodbye to the one thing I held most dear in my life. 

Klaus was a rescue dog, who experienced a traumatic first year and a half of his life before we found each other. I was fortunate enough to have had him for six years - though at this time I do believe that it was he who rescued me. It is believed he was a german shepherd/golden mix. One day, when I recover from this major loss, I fully intend to adopt a shepherd or shepherd golden mix once again as he was truly the best of both breeds and a kind loving soul. But, before I do, I was hopeful to gain as much knowledge as I can about this cancer if I am expected to face it again.

Any thoughts or sources of information/stories would be most appreciated.


----------



## JeanKBBMMMAAN

I am going to move this to the health section of the board. I am sorry to welcome you under these circumstances and I am very sorry that you lost Klaus, but so glad you found him in the first case (for both of you). 

I talked to a vet at Cornell about hemangiosarcomas - just to ask - can you generally predict/find them early. He said no.


----------



## Klaus My Love

I appreciate you posting this in the correct location. I also appreciate you providing me with the update from such a reputable source.


----------



## RebelGSD

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost two of mine to HSA.

I was blessed with 4 wonderful months with my boy after diagnosis and emergency surgery. This is our story.

http://www.germanshepherds.com/forum/loving-memory/105191-please-say-prayer-my-boy-hs.html


----------



## Myamom

Actually...Jean asked the vet at Cornell on my behalf......due to my grief...my agony over "could I have changed things"..."did I miss something"...etc..

I lost Mya the same way....great one day....collapsed the next. Upon arriving at the ER...we got the same news...she coded before we could even make any decisions...and despite CPR...could not be revived. 

In the end...it's a silent, deadly, fast, aggressive cancer....in most cases...there are no signs. I am so sorry for your loss. I understand the grief all too well. Prayers for peace for you.


----------



## Jax's Mom

I sorry for your loss. I lost my girl from this almost 2 years ago. I don't think they feel any pain from it, we had just come in from a walk where she ran around and played, she had never had a health concern in her life until 20 minutes before she died 
I too asked the vet if there was anything we could have done, he said even if you noticed it in the beginning, the prognosis isn't good and the treatment just causes more pain than good, and if the treatment is "successful", you only get an extra few months. He said with this disease, it really is best not to know. You get to enjoy each day with your dog, not knowing it's your last.


----------



## Klaus My Love

Thank you both for your messages. I have read "RebelGSD"'s reply and story - and that was a heartbreaking, and all too familiar story. Thank you so much for sharing. Klaus was suffering and on meds for severe arthritis (even at age 7.5), and I confused his lethargy and lack of appetite with what I was already experiencing in dealing with his prior collapses due to his prior diagnosis. Under all other conditions, if his symptoms occurred even three months ago, I would have rushed him to the vet much sooner. He had been through surgery a few years ago for bladder stones so I would have been prepared to help him once again through any issue. But, at this late point, the prognosis made by all three vets on staff was that if he made it through surgery I could only expect one day to four months as you both pointed out. I didn't know what to do. I am struggling with that same question of "Did I make the right decision?" I can only hope that I did. It was hard to put down my boy who was still alert and confused. It appears as if this is what many owners have dealt with.


----------



## holland

Just wanted to say so sorry for your loss-so glad you rescued her


----------



## kr16

I just went threw the same thing 4 weeks ago. Its a shock and horrible, do not blame yourself, its not your fault. With animals, they cannot talk and tell you something is wrong. When you finally notice a sign its usually to late.

Love the memories and get a new pup it does wonders. I have lost 8 great sheps already and its never a good thing but its something I expect and accept, its just worse when they go to early.

I feel your pain.


----------



## RebelGSD

I disagree that the treatment does more pain than good. My boy had excellent quality of life during the 4 months and every moment we were given was precious. It was definitely worth it and I would do it again. Other owners that treated their dog felt the same way. And there is a small fraction of dogs for whom surgery means full recovery, according to the experience of the oncologists at the University of Pennsylvania who treated my dog. 4 months in a dog life are equivalent to 3 human years. I know many people who put themselves through much more difficult treatments for a chance of getting an extra year or two.


----------



## RebelGSD

I opted for the surgery and treatment because my dog was perfectly healthy and strong otherwise and the ultrasound showed no visible metastases in other organs so I knew that he had chances of gaining months of good quality life. He was definitely nowhere ready to go. 
If a dog has other health issues and metastases, surgery does not really make sense. You made the right decision and there was nothing you could have done. We do not have x- ray vision to see what's going on inside the body.




Klaus My Love said:


> Thank you both for your messages. I have read "RebelGSD"'s reply and story - and that was a heartbreaking, and all too familiar story. Thank you so much for sharing. Klaus was suffering and on meds for severe arthritis (even at age 7.5), and I confused his lethargy and lack of appetite with what I was already experiencing in dealing with his prior collapses due to his prior diagnosis. Under all other conditions, if his symptoms occurred even three months ago, I would have rushed him to the vet much sooner. He had been through surgery a few years ago for bladder stones so I would have been prepared to help him once again through any issue. But, at this late point, the prognosis made by all three vets on staff was that if he made it through surgery I could only expect one day to four months as you both pointed out. I didn't know what to do. I am struggling with that same question of "Did I make the right decision?" I can only hope that I did. It was hard to put down my boy who was still alert and confused. It appears as if this is what many owners have dealt with.


----------



## kiya

I'm so sorry for your loss. 
I lost my first GSD this way, it was next to his heart. Cheyenne was about 9, never sick a day in his life. He went into cardiac arrest when it ruptured. There was nothing we could do to save him.


----------



## Jax's Mom

RebelGSD said:


> I disagree that the treatment does more pain than good. My boy had excellent quality of life during the 4 months and every moment we were given was precious. It was definitely worth it and I would do it again. Other owners that treated their dog felt the same way. And there is a small fraction of dogs for whom surgery means full recovery, according to the experience of the oncologists at the University of Pennsylvania who treated my dog. 4 months in a dog life are equivalent to 3 human years. I know many people who put themselves through much more difficult treatments for a chance of getting an extra year or two.


Well, good for you  
...I know that sound snarky, and it kind of is, but I'm happy for you and your family that you got what the rest of didn't.


----------



## Klaus My Love

RebelGSD said:


> I opted for the surgery and treatment because my dog was perfectly healthy and strong otherwise and the ultrasound showed no visible metastases in other organs so I knew that he had chances of gaining months of good quality life. He was definitely nowhere ready to go.
> If a dog has other health issues and metastases, surgery does not really make sense. You made the right decision and there was nothing you could have done. We do not have x- ray vision to see what's going on inside the body.


I guess that is why I am struggling so much now. I always took Klaus to this large vet hospital that I used for all this check-ups and treatments even though it was an hour away from my home because they saved him the first time so I trusted their opinion. Three different vets looked at his ultrasound - and all said that the tumor was so large and abnormal, spleen so damaged and there was no indication that the liver was intact either. I asked for three opinions and no one could give me hope. They said there was a only a 5% chance it was benign. They said that if they could give me hope they would - so I did what my instinct told me to do. I asked the same questions thirty different times hoping for a new answer. I was completely lost.


----------



## JeanKBBMMMAAN

You know, I don't know what kind of tumor my old dog had on his liver - the first one he had we found by chance and it was not really cancerous - just a big ugly tumor. A little less than a year later, he had a bleed like they talk about here (graphic picture warning) Canine Hemangiosarcoma . An ultrasound showed it was in a location where you could not operate (and even though he was almost 16 I would have given it a shot) and he was given hours to live. He lasted 5 weeks and when it broke open into a large bleed that was it. HOWEVER, I still feel guilty - despite the information I got that was pretty definitive, that I let him go. Two years later! Even when I logic it out, the heart stays sad. So while your brain knows you were right, the love that we have for them always makes us second guess everything we do.

Kramer....(posting for Jean) (







1 2 3 4 5 ... Last Page)


----------



## RebelGSD

While I was doing the treatment, I had "friends" attack me fo treating my dog and giving him a chance. It certainly helped with weeding out true friends from "friends" who knew it all better without ever seeing my dog and how well he was doing. I can only feel sorry for them. So I can certainly handle very well strangers on the Internet being snarky and nasty and judging me for giving my dog a chance. I can say the same to the snarky ones, good for you for putting down your dog if that is what you wanted.


----------



## Klaus My Love

I certainly didn't mean to start a debate right from wrong. That wasn't my intention at all!! I know everyone does what they can and what they feel is right for their own loves. I just am dealing with grief and guilt and was looking for knowledge and experiences so that I am arm myself with as much information as I can. I wasn't given much information at all when I walked out of the vet after this horrific experience. I do find extreme comfort in everyone's stories - all outcomes and options - as it is helping me understand what I was up against.


----------



## JeanKBBMMMAAN

You didn't start a debate - no worries. And when it hits that acute, big bleed like with Klaus and Mya, Kramer at the end...I don't think there are many options, the tumor has basically taken over our choices.


----------



## Jax's Mom

RebelGSD said:


> good for you for putting down your dog if that is what you wanted.


Very nice. I think I'm the one your comment was directed at, but I'm not the one that put my dog down it was the OP.

Klaus My Love, I hope we didn't ruin the thread for you, and you can take what is constructive from it, in this difficult time. :hugs:


----------



## Remo

I have lost two dogs to this hideous disease. 

Remo was chasing deer on a Sunday, and dead on Thursday of the same week. If he had been a candidate for surgery, I would have done it. He was only six years old. I would have spent every dime I had if it would have saved him. I still cry for him every single day. Something inside of me died when he did and I don't think it will ever be the same. 

No one can know or guess how things will go. A guy who adopted a foster of mine had her spleen removed when she was 12 1/2. She is almost 15 now and doing really well for an old, old girl. I thought he was crazy when he had the surgery done, because of her advanced age, but he thought otherwise. You just never know. 

If you need someone to talk to, please shoot me a PM and I will be happy to give you a call. I am also in VA, close to Dulles Airport. Our rescue group has lots of volunteers who have also lost dogs to this horrible, horrible disease. Perhaps we can be of some comfort to you. 

Please know you are in my thoughts.


----------



## selzer

While it is silent and deadly, I do not think it is all that hideous. I am really sorry for your loss. Shepherds worm their ways into our very souls and losing them is always losing a part of ourselves. 

But God created people with much longer lifespans than dogs, and they have to go someway. But 7.5 years is way too early. That is awful. They do have to go someway, and hemangiosarcoma seems like one of the better ways to go. 

I had a hemangiosarcoma scare with Arwen when she was just under seven and pregnant with her last litter. My vet had palpated her and felt her spleen was enlarged. He did x-rays and said that it was. He said hemangiosarcoma, and then told me with a surgery, she would probably live 6 - 12 months, without it 3 months. I let them do some bloodwork, and when he called me back, (bloodwork showed nothing) he said I should take her for an ultrasound. 

So off to the Akron Veterinary Referral. In the mean time, I looked up some information, and found that normally, when they bleed out, they get very sleepy and then fall asleep, and never wake up again. I made the decision that if she did have it, I would take her home and make her last few months happy ones, and not subject her to surgery. 

The vet at Akron palpated her, and agreed with my vet, and told me that after the ultrasound, the next step would be to see if it had masethesized (sp?) in the lungs. I let them do the ultrasound, and guess what, no tumors, no hematomas, she was pregnant. I did tell them all that, and Arwen was dancing around like she knew what it was all about. But whatever. 

The pregnancy was problematic and I had them spay her. 

At eight and a half, she had a urinary tract infection and was not keeping herself as clean as usual, we did some bloodwork and she was a point low on thyroid, we fixed the infection and started some thyroxine, and I switched her food, and she got better. With the change in foods and with collaberating with the vet, we decided to discontinue the thyroxine.

When she was almost nine years old, I let her out in the morning, she was running in the field, happy. When I came home that night, I found her on her cot, peaceful, she looked so good, healthy, peaceful, just dead. The day before she had left some kibble in her dish -- that was the ONLY symptom she had. 

But it did not seem like she suffered. And I can take some comfort in that. I say that I would have not opted for surgery, but Arwen was my heart dog. I do not know if my emotional self would have been able to follow through with what my logical self had determined. The choice was not given me. I am actually glad for that. 

I wish I could have been there when she passed, to say goodbye. But I would have probably rushed her to someone and maybe agreed to something painful or invasive. 

Tell your dogs how much you love them every day, so you will not regret losing them without telling them what a good and special girl they are. We do not always get to know when they will pass. Hemangiosarcoma takes them quickly, they do not suffer or at least they do not linger with a terrible, painful illness. But it is hard on us to lose them when they appear healthy, and are too young.


----------



## Jax's Mom

Well put


----------



## Klaus My Love

Selzer - thank you for your story. I am so sorry for your loss as well. It sounds as if you went through such a sorrowful experience - but it seems that you have been able to come to terms with what happened and your insight is very wise. 

Everyone who posted today has given me much comfort in knowing I am not alone in having dealt with such a scary experience. That it was beyond my control. And that guilt will get me nowhere. And the choices we each have made given our own personal experiences with our best friends was done to the best of our ability given the knowledge and instinct we were provided at that time. 

You all were so kind to have added to my thread today. So begins the healing process .... I know that life goes on. And I must believe that Klaus knew how much I loved him - and that I did the best that I knew how. He was happy boy and loved by so many. I can only hope that I will see him again one day.


----------



## n2gsds

I am so sorry to hear of your loss! You gave him a great home for six years. I think we always second guess ourselves. My Carleigh passed away in December of hemangiosarcoma at the age of 12 1/2. Before that, I had never heard of it. Up until the night she died, she played like a puppy. In time your grief will lessen and you can open up your heart to another furbaby!


----------



## shadow mum

I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my 12yr old Smokey Joe to this in 2008. He seemed fine, just a bit slow. One day he just didn't seem "right". We called and made an appt for the vet the next day. Smoke passed that night in my husbands' arms. We didn't have a clue that anything was wrong. The vet said that all signs pointed to hemangiosarcoma. I'm almost glad we didn't know. There was no worrying or sad thoughts until the day he passed, and he passed in my husbands arms and knew he was loved.


----------



## middleofnowhere

The late Barker the Younger came down with this. I remarked about her abdomen when I left her for boarding but they failed to ask the vet to look at her. I, too, thought her lethargy was related to another issue - her recovery from ACL surgery. When I got back, she had a bleed significant enough to demand immediate attention. I opted to operate & since the margins were clear & no apparent liver involvement, we thought she had something of a chance. With chemo I got another three months with her. With the next bleed, the ultra sound showed significant liver involvement. As she would only feel significantly poorly if she were allowed to die on her own over the next day or so, that time I opted to put her down. Surgery was not an option.

There's a real catch 22 with the disease - if they bleed out, the cancer will probably spread through the blood - if they don't, you will not get any notice that they have it.

It stinks.


----------



## LisaT

JeanKBBMMMAAN said:


> ..... So while your brain knows you were right, the love that we have for them always makes us second guess everything we do.


How true...


----------



## Klaus My Love

I was directed to the poem "A Living Love" by Martin Scot Kosins by a member of this forum ….you know who you are and I thank you.  No doubt many of you are familiar with this poem …. but there is one line that I love - and that I believe we all may be able to relate to:

_“….there will come a realization that belongs only to you. It will be as unique and strong as our relationship with each animal we have loved, and lost. This realization takes the form of a Living Love -- like the heavenly scent of a rose that remains after the petals have wilted, this Love will remain and grow -- and be there for us to remember. It is a love we have earned. It is the legacy our pets leave us when they go. And it is a gift we may keep with us as long as we live.”_


----------



## natalie559

I am so sorry for your loss!


----------



## raysmom

We believe our Ray probably died of hemangiosarcoma also. He was fine on Friday and on Saturday he wouldn't eat and seemed a little under the weather, but nothing that would make us rush him to the vet. By Sunday he could barely get up. Our then vet came to the house and said we should take him in to the office for a chest x-ray, thinking it might be congestive heart failure, but his heart was not enlarged and his lungs were clear. We took him home and the vet made arrangements for him to be seen at a specialty clinic the next day. 

My husband was driving him to the clinic about an hour and a half away, and he looked in the rearview mirror once and Ray had lifted his head up. Rick thought maybe he was uncomfortable, so he stopped along the highway and made sure everything was ok. He started driving again, looked back at him once more and he had passed away. He was only 8 years old. 

We questioned and doubted ourselves for a very long time that we hadn't noticed something, done something sooner, differently, etc. But in the end, we followed our vet's advice and did what we thought was best at the time. 

I know the pain you are going through. It just doesn't seem fair that these magnificent creatures are only with us for such a short time. I don't know if you've ever read "The Journey", but this it one of my favorites by Crystal Ward Kent and I must have read it a million times after Ray died:

Crystal Ward Kent - The Journey

Take care.


----------



## 1sttimeforgsd

You will see Klaus again some day, he will be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge where he is running free now. So untill then you have your precious memories to hold on to and maybe someday you will be able to welcome a new little member to your family. So sorry for your loss, we have all been there and it is never easy, the GSD family here on the forum are pretty good to share help and support, so Welcome and please make yourself at home.


----------



## arycrest

I'm so sorry for your loss, my condolences!!!

I've lost several of the Hooligans to this silent killer ... like others have said, all is sunshine and roses until they have a bleedout and suddenly they're dead. 

My mutt Bo had hemangiosarcoma of the spleen and I opted to have the surgery ... when they opened him up he was riddled with cancer ... per our pre-surgical agreement, the vet put him down on the table.

Echo and Ringer were diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma of the heart ... as far as I know nothing can be done for this type.

Kelly was ill with a few extremely serious health issues and I had an ultrasound done before making up my mind if he should be put down or not. In addition to the other issues, they discovered he also had hemangiosarcoma of the heart ... I called his breeder, we talked about an hour and both of us agreed it was in his best interest to be put down. If he hadn't had so many other health issues I'm not sure what I would have done since I don't know how much time the hemangiosarcoma will take to kill them.

*Echo*









*Bo*









*Ringer*









*Kelly*


----------



## Otus

*living in the moment*

I am a new member who joined last friday ( 13th). Otus had a ultrasound that showed multiple tumors of the spleen & other diagnostics that indicated a very poor prognosis. It seems that many GSD owners find their way here when searching for answers/support & common bond through as I did.
I've spent some time reading members stories of final days with their dogs. It is so very sad. 
I am now having that same experience with my dog who is reminding me on this day that, he's still very much here. 
Last week my sons prepared a burial site as death seemed imminent.......instead he roused to eat roast turkey & has currently rebounded. Yesterday was a play in the pond day. We are going outside once I finish this post. We will play if he wants to otherwise it's the hammock for me. Worry has worn me out & bothers him too........he thinks life is good right now.
Thank you all for being out there & sharing your stories.


----------



## RebelGSD

Otus said:


> I am a new member who joined last friday ( 13th). Otus had a ultrasound that showed multiple tumors of the spleen & other diagnostics that indicated a very poor prognosis. It seems that many GSD owners find their way here when searching for answers/support & common bond through as I did.
> I've spent some time reading members stories of final days with their dogs. It is so very sad.
> I am now having that same experience with my dog who is reminding me on this day that, he's still very much here.
> Last week my sons prepared a burial site as death seemed imminent.......instead he roused to eat roast turkey & has currently rebounded. Yesterday was a play in the pond day. We are going outside once I finish this post. We will play if he wants to otherwise it's the hammock for me. Worry has worn me out & bothers him too........he thinks life is good right now.
> Thank you all for being out there & sharing your stories.


A couple of times they can rebound from a bleed. Usually they are very weak and tired first. Dogs can reabsorb blood from the abdomen. It takes, 5-6 hours to reabsorb and they can act normal for a week or a couple of days afterwards. 
One day they can have a major bleed and they don't recover from it. The good thing is that this cancer is not painful, they just become very weak.

Prayers going your way, try to enjoy whatever time you have with your pup...


----------



## LisaT

Here is a thread of a mixed breed that was diagnosed in Dec 2010, and has been using diet and supplements to treat for the remainder of his time here. 

Raggs has been dx'd with Hemangioma or Hemangiosarcoma - Pet forum for dogs cats and humans - Pets.ca


----------



## DharmasMom

I am so very sorry for your loss. I personally think it is a very personal decision on whether on not to treat this horrible disease and no one should be have to tolerate snarky comments either way. We all do what we feel is best for the dogs that we love dearly.

That said, I have not lost a dog to this so while I don't know your pain, I can give you my deepest sympathy. I can not imagine the grief I will feel when I lose Dharma ( no matter what the cause) and especially if it happens at such a young age. I want to thank you though for saving him. You gave him a wonderful life and made up for his very rough start. I have little doubt your love was returned in full. I hope that soon you will open your heart to another 4 legged friend and give another deserving dog a home that needs one. 

RIP Klaus. Run free at the bridge. He is waiting there for you and one day you will see him again.


----------



## CaliBoy

Klaus and Otus' Family: Welcome to the forum. Please accept my feelings of sympathy and condolence as you deal with Klaus' death, and with Otus' illness.

I lost my female GSD to hemangiosarcoma in 2008, and her death introduced me to a nightmare of unspeakable grief from which I thought I could not recover. But eventually I have come around, and as you can see from fellow posters, there is a way out of the grief eventually. For me, it was a time of sleepness nights, sobbing at all hours, shock, and practically an obsession to find out everything I could about hemangiosarcoma. 

A week before she died, she couldn't clot and her back leg began to swell with a real ugly hematoma. The vet saw the tumors on the spleen with an ultrasound, and said she only had about a week left. A week later, when she started to bleed from the tumors, my parents' vet came to their house, where I was visiting, and put her down. 

There are some owners who are able to render medical treatment for their dogs with hemangio. I envy them with perfect envy, because I would have done anything just to have one more week with my princess. The guilt that I should have done something, and didn't, before she died, was so searing on my conscience. I felt this guilt for the longest time, and was often angry with myself for not having done something more for her, an anger which unfortunately surfaced and was taken out on those around me. 

I wondered, and tortured myself with the thought, that perhaps my dog did not forgive me for not having taken better care of her. As I read more about this disease, that guilt and doubt began to subside, because I learned that in most dogs, it is an unbelievably aggressive cancer. I once corresponded with a vet, in fact, who had lost his dog to this disease. 

He told me that if he, a vet, who regularly could check up on his own pets with medical knowledge and sophisticated equipment, and still could not catch the cancer in his own dog, I should no longer worry that I was somehow supposed to detect it in my dog. This vet called hemangio the "silent and merciless killer" of many beloved pets. It can come out of nowhere and deprive many people of quality end of life time with their dog. Many hemangio sufferers die when their owners are at work, or in town shopping.

I am a person of faith. I picture my German Shepherd with the Lord, happy in heaven, free from pain, and waiting for me. That picture of her, in a place where she runs around with my loved ones who have crossed over already, brings some comfort. The photos of her and her old collar also are a comfort. My present dog, who I got right after she passed, brought great comfort. And finally, her resting place, at my parents home, is a comfort, because I can visit and see how my parents have honored her in that part of their yard.

Again, please accept my sincere sypathies and know that in the others here who have gone through this trial, you will find many kindred spirits.


----------



## vat

I am so very sorry for your loss, it is heartbreaking to loose our dogs. While I have never had to deal with this awful illness I did have to put down a 16 month old due to kidney failure. I am not sure which is worse, a silent killer or knowing that you have a ticking clock. When Rio crashed (a term we use in kidney failure) it was worse than I expected it to be. Watching your pup suffer will rip your heart out.

I do believe our past dogs send us our current dogs. Rio sent me Max who I tell every day I love him. Rio taught me allot about life. Your wonderful boy will send you another to fill your heart when the time is right. :hugs:


----------



## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

My thoughts and prayer are with you and your family.


----------



## Klaus My Love

Otus said:


> I am a new member who joined last friday ( 13th). Otus had a ultrasound that showed multiple tumors of the spleen & other diagnostics that indicated a very poor prognosis. It seems that many GSD owners find their way here when searching for answers/support & common bond through as I did.
> I've spent some time reading members stories of final days with their dogs. It is so very sad.
> I am now having that same experience with my dog who is reminding me on this day that, he's still very much here.
> Last week my sons prepared a burial site as death seemed imminent.......instead he roused to eat roast turkey & has currently rebounded. Yesterday was a play in the pond day. We are going outside once I finish this post. We will play if he wants to otherwise it's the hammock for me. Worry has worn me out & bothers him too........he thinks life is good right now.
> Thank you all for being out there & sharing your stories.


My thoughts and prayers are with you at this very moment. I hope this community is able to bring you comfort as it did me. You are going through such a rough time .... I can only imagine how sad you are right now ....please enjoy your time with your boy. Turkey and swims in the pond?! You know he is a happy boy and so lucky to have you.


----------



## sondraham

I am crying my eyes out reading about this horrible disease that took my 8yr old GSD less then 10 hours ago. I am a bit angry that when I had the GDV surgery 8months ago that they did not notice a tumor, and they convinced me that everything was normal, So now I am eating myself up about it. Did they overlook it or is it possible that this tumor could have grown after the surgery? A month ago my dog was acting really anemic, pale gums, not eating, diarrhea, loosing weight, and breathing hard etc. SO I rushed him to my vet and they did x-rays, but since the machine is not digital it is harder to find tumors on film x-rays. Anyway the vet did not find anything and we did a complete blood count and a pancreatitis test, everything came back normal except his WBC has high, so we did three days of fluid therapy, and she sent me home with antibiotics suggesting he must of had a bacterial infection. He got better for a couple weeks and then his symptoms came back and I took him to the ER where the vet just gave him gas x and palpated his abdomen. After this he was better for two days and then I decided to take him to a internal specialist on Tuesday, where the vet decided to do more blood work and put him on tylan powder and low residue food, so there I was hanging with no answers and angry that no one could figure out why his gums were so pale and he could barely walk he was so weak. Between Tuesday and last night I knew his time was near, I was having dreams that he died in my house and he was starting to sleep downstairs, he also started to give me intense death stares that I can not explain, but he was trying to tell me something was wrong. Yesterday I woke up and he ate breakfast and lunch and he even got a little spunk, enough to where we went on a walk and he wanted to stalk the squirrels. This was his last walk, I left for work and came home at 11pm to a dog that was so weak he was stumbling down the stairs and he was breathing heavy and his gums were pale. I rushed him to the ER where a amazing compassionate vet new exactly what it was a bleeding tumor (hemangiosarcoma). They shaved his stomach and did a flash ultrasound and she was able to see the bleeding. I did everything I could and he had an amazing life, but how do I move on from such pain?


----------



## Klaus My Love

Sondraham - I completely understand what you are going through. I wish I was able to give you advice on how to get past your grief, but it is a very personal thing. I hope you have read all of the posts and links that the other forum members have posted this week, and maybe that will help you in taking comfort in knowing you are definitely not alone in your experience with HSA and the sadness of a sudden loss. You did the best you could. What is helping me is trying to remember that I to did the best that I could, and nothing can take away the memories I had with my boy. Not even his passing. We will always have those memories. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Thank you again to you ALL for posting your stories ... I can't tell you how grateful I am to have found such a supportive and kind group. I have read each posting. Your stories, links, poems and thoughts have helped me get through a very tough week. Finding this site was a real blessing.


----------



## Carryingon

Peace and comfort to you, and to all those who have posted here about their losses. I too lost my Opa, six years old, to this horrible cancer and still struggle with feelings of guilt - how didn't I realize he was that ill?! Because he never exhibited serious symptoms until the very end, and even then he was diligently doing his job as a family companion and protector. My family and friends are still in disbelief. But it is immensely healing to read others sharing stories and understanding that validates their love and care for their dogs.


----------



## Kim Cassavino

*Peace*

So sorry for your loss Last Sunday my 7 year old girl was in the hospital with GI issues and facing a potential exploratory surgery.. we were lucky and she has settled down and is on the road to recovery. This all came on very suddenly too at a vet appt on Saturday regarding stomach issues. We have such a unique bond with our dogs and when they are sick it is the worst feeling knowing sometimes there is so little we can do. I joined last week this forum to talk to those who love the breed like me. Their words provided me with strength and comfort. Please know many good thoughts coming your way and your boy Klaus is never far away. Peace~


----------



## asja

My dog Boris passed away from hemangiosarcoma October 18, 2008, aged almost 12. A few weeks before, I noticed his abdomen was distended, and took him that day for a checkup. My vet just grimaced, and examined him with ultrasound, and there was a big tumor on his spleen. The next day she removed his spleen, and told me his liver was riddled with cancer and asked me for permission to put him down. I just couldn't do it. My older dog Asja had died a few months previously, and I wasn't ready to lose Boris too. He recovered from that surgery, but only lived three more weeks, and passed away a few days after my birthday. On my actual birthday, he perked up that day and was playful and energetic, but the next day crashed, and never recovered again,and died a few days later. I was devastated. But I knew I did everything I could for him, there was nothing more I could do. There was no warning.

Sondraham, your dog was likely sick the past month or so, but doubtful longer than that. Eight months ago when your dog had GDV surgery, I highly doubt the tumors were there. Hemangiosarcoma is fast growing aggressive cancer with few symptoms. My dog also had surgery five months before he passed away, and all tests were normal and nothing obviously wrong with him. I'm sorry. I know how hard it is to lose a beloved dog. 

Klaus, and all the other responders, it's so sad to lose our dog to such a horrid cancer. I wish there was more hopeful treatment, or an explanation of why this cancer happens. In my dog's case, the year before, he had a very bad infection with Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever, a tick-borne infection. It took him months to recover. Two vets I saw for his hemangiosarcoma thought the severity of the RMSF infection likely led to hemangiosarcoma, both spread through blood. But this isn't proven, but it seem likely the two illnesses are related.


----------



## Otus

Hemangiosarcoma wasn't something I knew anything about before 5/13. Searching info about it brought me to GSD Forums and this thread started by Klaus.
The support is very helpful here. It is also very sad to read and feel the deep hurt shared by those who are here with past or present grief.
I count myself lucky to have almost 9 years with Otus and the chance to really focus on my time with him the last few days. He has not behaved like a dog with a life-stealing illness.......until yesterday. I had to be away for 5 hours. I left a energetic, alert, happy dog and returned to find him near death. I knew something was wrong when he didn't greet me at the gate. I found him in the yard. Glassy eyed, pale gums, cold extremities. He was able with major assist to get in to the house. I did my best to hold myself together and care for him. It was fortunate that he did not exhibit anything that I could read as pain. Temp went from 102 to 105. I spritzed water on his gums. His abdomen wasn't distended. I thought I'd be watching him die. Instead he was able to drink water after a bit. When I went over to my bed.......I don't know how he had the strength.......he got up & stagger/wobbled his way next to my bed. His spot.
This morning he continued extremely weak and walked/wobbled as if his front & hind were disconnected. He managed to go out to pee and would eats only the extra smelly salmon dog treats. His tummy has distension today.
One last day. 
The quote I've read here is , "better a day early, then a day late". How utterly awful it is to have to even consider euthanasia for a beloved pet.
I of course think there is no better dog then a good GSD although I love my greyhound Vincent too. Otus hears me sniffling and gives me that cocked head, quizzical look with his beautiful amber eyes. He is alert & present at this moment. 
We've spent part of this sunny day outside. He wanted to go in the (shallow) pond today; I told him "no" as I thought of the possibility of a collapsed dog in the pond rescue....he stopped and gave me that, "do you really mean that?" look. I relented as this has been a last day for him to do whatever he wants.
Tomorrow is one last car ride. I kinda wish he goes tonight instead. I must buck up and try not to trouble him with my emotions.....which in his doggy way he tries to fix me whenever I've been broken.
The normally docile greyhound has snapped at Otus and I wonder if there is some ancient dog pack instinct behind his behavior.
And, I must thank you all for being there & sharing


----------



## shadow mum

Otus, sounds like you gave him a wonderful day today. Enjoy the time you have left. :hug:


----------



## Otus

I have NEVER done anything harder then I did today. The house seems empty now except for a whimpering greyhound. Otus thought the ride to the vet was fun. He loved to ride in the truck and wasn't scared to of anything....even the vet. Now I can scream/cry & not trouble him.........but it doesn't help Vincent to see me fall apart. The hardest part is now over & a kind of numbness sets in.
The vet was excellent in his compassion/knowledge & reassurance that I was indeed doing what was right for Otus with this awful cancer. I held it together for my dog.
My sons have helped to bury him. I'm an artist by trade and have made molds of his paw prints for a special sculpture that I will dedicate to his brave shepherd spirit. My guardian, my friend. 
The neighbors (english bulldog lovers) loved him too & would often "borrow" Otus for walks that their dogs weren't physically up to. I am really going to miss him as I keep looking for him in the spaces he used to be. Nearly nine years with him always by my side. When my elderly Father moved in with me I was afraid Otus would knock my frail parent over......not so, this big dog was ever so gentle & would go to my Father's room every morning to check on him.
I'm sharing my story as it helps me to speak it. It has helped me here to not feel so alone as I've read what others have written here about their wonderful dogs & sad good byes.


----------



## babylicky

Hello. As I read your story I can feel your grief and loss. I am sooo sorry. I know what it is like to suddenly lose a beloved best friend. I lost my Jake in 2005 suddenly, though I don't know what of. He was playful, happy and full of energy until one day when I came home from work and found him. It takes a long time to get over. I now have 2 gsd who fill my life with lots of love and joy. 
I have never heard of this kind of cancer but I now will definitely be researching this. 

-Again, so sorry for you loss-


----------



## NancyJ

I lost Toby to hemangiosarcoma a few years ago at the age of 11. Sudden onset and he was gone within a few months. When he got to where he would not eat and was getting weak we took him in for that final trip.

He was a trooper with a life full of allergies, fighting loose stools, and successful surgery for perianal fistulas. 

I understand your pain and wish I knew why so many dogs get this cancer nowadays.


----------



## LisaT

Asja, you wrote above:

**In my dog's case, the year before, he had a very bad infection with Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever, a tick-borne infection. It took him months to recover. Two vets I saw for his hemangiosarcoma thought the severity of the RMSF infection likely led to hemangiosarcoma, both spread through blood. But this isn't proven, but it seem likely the two illnesses are related.**

I read a study once where dogs on flea and tick preventative had less occurrence of hemangio. I do believe that these blood infections can lead to these blood cancers. 
My deepest sympathies for the loss of Otus and all the other victims of this terrible cancer.


----------



## CaliBoy

LisaT said:


> I read a study once where dogs on flea and tick preventative had less occurrence of hemangio.


That is interesting. I haven't read the studies, but in my case, my GSD was on flea and tick preventative her whole life, and still came down with hemangio. She was pretty pampered and spoiled her whole life, so everyone called her my princess LOL. 

Then there are dogs I have heard of who passed from hemangio and had a pretty rough life. My anecdotal take is that those dogs who were poor boys and suffered deprivations and those who were given the life of comfort and plenty both fall victim to this cancer.

The mystery with cancer is that it strikes the healthy and the unhealthy. As I compare notes between my dog and other hemangiosarcoma victims, there are such disparities that the only thing that was held in common is that they were all dogs that died.


----------



## Nigel's Best Friend

I came across this forum today while searching for some inner comfort. I lost my GSD Nigel on Monday morning at 3:06am to this terrible illness. He was my best friend and I have been devastated by his loss. I still have my other GSD Isabelle and she has also lost her best buddy.

There are no warnings with this cancer. Until Sunday night I had never even heard of this. Nigel was fine Sunday until 6pm when he started breathing heavy and I noticed his stomach had become distended. I rushed him to the vet and was told that his prognosis was not good. I did elect to have surgery in the hope that I would be able to take him home. When the DVM called me and told me he had several tumors on his spleen that had ruptured as well has other masses that had attached to the stomach wall and had ruputured, I lost it. Nigel's prognosis was a week at best. My husband had to call back to get the details and we had to make the very very difficult decision to let him go. 

I have not gone to work all week. The grief and loss that I feel is overwhelming. I can only tell people on this forum that you need to treasure what you have because you don't know when it will be taken from you.

Nigel was only 6 1/2 years old when he passed. I take comfort in the fact that he had a very pampered life, one that most people don't have. I read a peom that mentioned that if love alone could have saved him, he never would have died. That is so true.

My heart aches for Klaus and all the other pet parents who have lost thier friends to this awful illness.


----------



## CaliBoy

Nigel's Best Friend:

I am glad you found this forum, where the testimony of many GSD owners will indeed bring some comfort in the midst of the sorrow. In the meantime please accept my condolences on the loss of your Nigel.


----------



## Otus

I'm so sorry that you are having this experience of grief. It is so hard to lose a beloved pet. Just eight days ago I had to say goodbye to my dog. He was my constant companion, my buddy. There's an emptiness without him now.
I hope you can take the time off that you need to grieve your loss of Nigel. Sending you kind thoughts & condolances


----------



## asja

Nigel, Otus, Klaus, and everyone who lost a dog, I'm sorry for your loss. It's a dreadful illness that gives little warning. 

My dog Boris died two and a half years ago and I still miss him every day and wish he was here.


----------



## CarrieJ

I share your grief. I lost my Loki to this in 2007. 
He was a eight month old rescue running out of time when he came to live with me; and was 12 when he passed. I'll never stop missing my big dorky guy.
Peaceful thoughts to help ease your pain through this devasting loss.


----------



## Nigel's Best Friend

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. This forum has been a huge help to me. It has let me know that I am not alone in my grief and that others have gone through this.

There will come a time when I will get not one but two puppies. I know that Nigel will be with me to help me pick out those. The love and compassion that these wonderful friends give is like no other. I feel blessed to have been a part of his short life.


----------



## klramper

I lost Lucien my 8 year old shepherd in May. He wasn't himself, took him to the vet and I knew it wasn't going to be good, it was a gut feeling. Lucien live for 3 weeks after the diagnosis. I was able to work from home and I spent every minute with him. He was that special dog and my best friend. I miss him tremendously. I still cry and will never forget him. He was the best!


----------



## beaderdog

I'm so sorry you lost your boy. I lost my Dobie to HSA.


----------



## NinaM

Nigel's Best Friend said:


> I came across this forum today while searching for some inner comfort. I lost my GSD Nigel on Monday morning at 3:06am to this terrible illness. He was my best friend and I have been devastated by his loss. I still have my other GSD Isabelle and she has also lost her best buddy.
> 
> There are no warnings with this cancer. Until Sunday night I had never even heard of this. Nigel was fine Sunday until 6pm when he started breathing heavy and I noticed his stomach had become distended. I rushed him to the vet and was told that his prognosis was not good. I did elect to have surgery in the hope that I would be able to take him home. When the DVM called me and told me he had several tumors on his spleen that had ruptured as well has other masses that had attached to the stomach wall and had ruputured, I lost it. Nigel's prognosis was a week at best. My husband had to call back to get the details and we had to make the very very difficult decision to let him go.
> 
> I have not gone to work all week. The grief and loss that I feel is overwhelming. I can only tell people on this forum that you need to treasure what you have because you don't know when it will be taken from you.
> 
> Nigel was only 6 1/2 years old when he passed. I take comfort in the fact that he had a very pampered life, one that most people don't have. I read a peom that mentioned that if love alone could have saved him, he never would have died. That is so true.
> 
> My heart aches for Klaus and all the other pet parents who have lost thier friends to this awful illness.



I just lost my dog also to Hemangiosarcoma.....she was 8 yrs old. I had never heard of this either.....my dog seemed to be showing fatigue for a couple of months. I thought maybe she was getting that "degenerative myopathy" or even hip dysplasia, even though she was not favoring her hips.
I am wondering why this is so common in German Shepherds.....does anyone know. 
I also weighed having the "Spleen" removal surgery and decided not to.

AGAIN....why is this type cancer so common in this breed.....will have more Shepherds in the future....I do not want to lose another dog to cancer.....thanks.....I am very sad also///// My dog was an angel.


----------



## BowWowMeow

NinaM--

I'm very sorry for your loss. I lost my Basu to hemangiosarcoma when he 10 years old. It's very common in bigger breeds and seems to affect other deep chested dogs like also rotties and labs. Cancer is becoming more and more common in all dogs.


----------



## ponyfarm

Feeling sad! Just lost my second dog tonight to this disease. We were treating him for hemalytic anemia..turned out this rotten cancer. The emergency clinic was great and I will forever have a lovely vision of my Ed-Dog lying on a gurney with a white fuzzy blanket and a pillow on his way to cross the bridge.


----------



## arycrest

ponyfarm said:


> Feeling sad! Just lost my second dog tonight to this disease. We were treating him for hemalytic anemia..turned out this rotten cancer. The emergency clinic was great and I will forever have a lovely vision of my Ed-Dog lying on a gurney with a white fuzzy blanket and a pillow on his way to cross the bridge.


I'm so sorry for you loss ... this is a horrendous disease.


----------



## Stosh

Oh no, I'm so sorry.


----------



## ponyfarm

Thanks guys! Having a hard time going to bed! I knew you all would understand.


----------



## GSDLoverII

*Casey's Killer*

Modiano Lab - Cancer Info - Hemangiosarcoma


----------



## GSDBESTK9

Very sorry for your loss.


----------



## GSDLoverII

Canine Hemangiosarcoma


----------



## Scarlettsmom

Klaus, your story sounds so sadly like ours. We opted for surgery, but it didn't buy our dog any more quality time. Faced with the same scenario now, we would have chosen as you did. My heart breaks for you. 

We were in VA when we lost Paige and immediately began the process of rescuing another GSD or GSD mix. We contacted Virginia German Shepherd Rescue and worked with them to find our lovely Scarlett. The compassion and support we received from them helped us deal with our grief. I highly recommend this outstanding organization if you are in VA and looking to rescue. I do know there are other wonderful rescue groups in VA (we have done transport for them a few times). 

No words can ease what you have been through, but the love and companionship of another GSD goes a long way in the healing process, in our experience.


----------



## skischool

I too have just lost my beloved companion of 10 1/2 years Jake. He was slowing down a little the last two months and then suddenly heavy breathing collapsing and weak. He had a black stool before we went to the vet, his breath smelled funny and his gums were white and he looked so tired.. I am still in shock and totally devastated by this. Angry, feeling guilty and thinking I failed him as an owner. Then I researched it and found this forum and I feel not so alone. I cried a little less today, its been 4 days since I put him down. The only clues now were increase in water consumption and lethargy. He was fine on Saturday and crashed Saturday night. Died sunday at 1:45 pm in my arms.. He spirit will be with me forever...


----------



## CaliBoy

skischool said:


> I too have just lost my beloved companion of 10 1/2 years Jake. He was slowing down a little the last two months and then suddenly heavy breathing collapsing and weak. He had a black stool before we went to the vet, his breath smelled funny and his gums were white and he looked so tired.. I am still in shock and totally devastated by this. Angry, feeling guilty and thinking I failed him as an owner. Then I researched it and found this forum and I feel not so alone. I cried a little less today, its been 4 days since I put him down. The only clues now were increase in water consumption and lethargy. He was fine on Saturday and crashed Saturday night. Died sunday at 1:45 pm in my arms.. He spirit will be with me forever...


So very, very sorry to read about your beloved Jake. My dog also drank lots and lots of water, and slept practically all day, before I lost her. Those last moments when they are in your arms--that is a killer. My girl looked up at me, stared me straight in the eyes, before her eyelids became droopy and then her soft, furry head laid gently against my arm. It's like something in you is dying also. May Jake rest in peace.


----------



## skischool

*My Beloved Jacob*

Thank you Caliboy, I am still so completely wiped out and its been 5 days. I go to his grave every day and talk to him. I am putting together a photo book of him but it just tears me up to see him.... He was so smart and loyal and gental and sweet... I am totally devestated! I am glad I didn't know of his condition as I would have slowly died along with him.. We had a wonderful summer playing in the river and at the beach, his favortite place!! Two months later I bury him... Not fair!!!!!


----------



## wolfstraum

I am sorry for your loss Skischool....I lost Kyra to this almost 2 years ago....we (her retirement family and I) opted for surgery - she died 10 days later. 

After watching, and hearing, of dogs suffering and progessively getting worse and worse from other illnesses and ailments, I do feel that a short time of illness/discomfort is far less traumatic for our furkids than a long drawn out losing battle - my male, Ghost dog  , had many relatives on his bottom side that were lost to this...and I am prepared that this may happen as he reaches nearly 11 years old....

<<hugs>>

Lee


----------



## lrodptl

We lost Shaeffer (11) last year to torsion 2 weeks after splenectomy for hemangiosarcoma. I buried him on his bed with his ball and covered him with a blanket on a piece of my wooded property. I still tear up when I think about it and I stood over him yesterday reminiscing. It's easier now but we have a 2 year old GSD who has helped fill in the void. It gets easier weekly,I wouldn't say daily.


----------



## skischool

*My sweet Jacob*

Thanks Irod and Wolf, The pain is starting to ease yet I find myself slipping into bouts of utter sadness at times. I go out to his grave all the time and talk to him. I tell him that I am sorry and tell him that he was such a good boy, he did his job, protector of my children and wife and my best friend. 
He presence is everywhere in our house, I had to move all his beds out the first thing, yet I still look for him wherever I am in the house..
I have a huge oil painting of him done at 1 yr and it is so Jake. Sweet, sensitive, caring, loyal. I speak to him thru that painting as well.
I really hope I can get thru this, I havent worked since I put him down, don't know if I can...
Michael


----------



## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet Jake. My heart goes out to you .Please take care.


----------



## corolla

I just lost my 8 year, 9 month old female Kali to hemangiosarcoma. 

When she was diagnosed in early August, it was because the mass on her spleen had burst, and we got her to the emergency clinic. They stabilized her, ultrasounded her and found no other masses. We discussed it thoroughly with the oncologist and the surgeon and went ahead with surgery to give her a chance at more time, with the understanding that if there were more masses found during surgery, we'd spare her the pain of recovery and euthanize her there.

The report came out to the waiting room that the surgeon found nothing else and surgery went well. She came home after two days, and we set up camp on the first floor for two weeks so she wouldn't have to climb stairs to go to bed. The biopsy of the mass came back as malignant, though the the liver sample was clear.

She went through 5 chemotherapy treatments, tolerating them very well. No nausea, diarrhea, good bloodwork, great energy levels. Her quality of life was GREAT. If you didn't know, you'd never know there was anything wrong with her.

Five weeks ago, her chest films and ultrasound showed no masses. Bloodwork normal. Everything normal. In the ensuing weeks, we'd spent time with her on the Chesapeake, down at the Outer Banks of NC twice and just enjoying this bonus time with her as much as possible. She was spoiled even more than ever before. She got to play in the snow one more time because of the freak storm in October.

Last Wednesday, she had a great day, complete with a walk on the beach. That evening she collapsed. Early Thanksgiving morning, we let her go. Even knowing it was coming, I'm still devastated.

We did get those three extra months with her. I can't overstate how important it was. We had great vets and techs caring for her and educating us. Her quality of life was excellent until the very end. When it wasn't possible for that to continue, we kept the promise we made to her that we would not prolong her pain to spare us some.

Every case has to be taken on its own. I guess I'm posting this story for people who are looking for information. It's just one more experience, but maybe it will help someone.


----------



## Kym

*my shepherd had this*

My shepherd had a hemangiosarcoma - diagnosed upon xray (prior to surgery for bloat). It was on the left atrium of her heart. She showed no abnormal ekg's and/or arrythmia's. She was 9 when they found it. I was told that it was a very slow growing tumor and that she probably had it from a young age-if not at birth. No medical treatment necessary because of no symptoms. She would probably die of "old age" or be eaten by a vampire before it would effect her life. The spleen can be removed and a dog can survive without it


----------



## LisaT

My boy, Max, lost to hemangiosarcoma 2/7/2012 :rip:

Abdominal u/s showed a large mass in his spleen, several in his liver, and diffuse spread in his omentum. This follows a long hard battle with illness over many months, in fact years.

VDI test in 11/2011 was 5.5. VDI test on 2/7/2012 was 18.5. He was on several antibiotics at the time (including doxycycline) and 2.5 mg of pred every other day, which may have affected some of the tests., or slowed the growth.

Bloodwork in Jan showed no signs. Ultrasounds, xrays, and cardiogram last summer showed no signs of hemangiosarcoma. The u/s then, and in 4/2010, showed an enlarged spleen, which did not look like hemangio. In fact, u/s last summer, the vet said it looked more like a lymphoma would look like, or a chronic inflammatory process.

I am very sad to add him to this thread. I miss my boy.


----------



## asja

I am so sorry to hear about Max, and all the other dogs. Having lost a dog to hemangiosarcoma, I know how hard it is that there were no signs, it just seems to show up with no warning. I hate hearing about so many dogs that have died from this. 

I'm so sorry.


----------



## LisaT

Thank you asja. I find it so sad that there are so many, that we have a sticky dedicated to their loss  A roll call in honor, of sorts. :rip:


----------



## RebelGSD

I am so sorry about Max. This seems to be turning into an epidemic. Take care of yourself...
Run free at the Bridge Max and watch over your mom...


----------



## GSDLoverII

Lisa,
I just saw this today.
I am so sorry about Max.
The list just keeps growing.
Has it always been like this with GSD's and hemangiosarcoma, or am I just noticing this now because it happened and is happening to my dogs?
It really is an epidemic.
How old was Max?
He will definitely be in good company up there.
I am so sorry. 
You have helped me and my dogs so many times over the years and I just want to say thank you.
I wish I could help you now.
{{{Hugs}}}
God speed Max.


----------



## NancyJ

I will add Cyra to the roll call. 8 years, 11 months. She passed away last Saturday. I don't need support now for that and I did post and many sent their good wishes. But it is a roll call of sorts in this thread. 

It is just so hard to see these dogs dying so young. Why does my neighbor have a 17 year old Husky who has eaeten nothing but Pedigree and goes for walks with her every ngiht? Why did my old GSD live to be 15 and now they are amazing if they make it to 12? What the heck is going on?


----------



## Loneforce

jocoyn said:


> I will add Cyra to the roll call. 8 years, 11 months. She passed away last Saturday. I don't need support now for that and I did post and many sent their good wishes. But it is a roll call of sorts in this thread.
> 
> It is just so hard to see these dogs dying so young. Why does my neighbor have a 17 year old Husky who has eaeten nothing but Pedigree and goes for walks with her every ngiht? Why did my old GSD live to be 15 and now they are amazing if they make it to 12? What the heck is going on?


 I agree 100% kinda makes you wonder whats going on with the food now. You may find this hard to believe, but I had a gsd live to be 19 yrs old and it dont make sense, because according to what we should be feeding them now, and what I fed him he shouldnt of lived near as long as he did. Right now all my dogs eat TOTW salmon. The dog that lived 19 yrs old ate Dads dog food.... 'kinda scary huh'


----------



## obxterra

Adding Jaz vom Johnson-Haus to the list. Passed away at 9 years, 9 months. This is the shortest of any of my dogs in the past. My GSD's from the 70's both lived 14 years, as well as, my Lab from the 80's. This was my first experience with HS and was a shock. Is it the food or what?


----------



## Loneforce

I doubt its the food, but I just brought that up as an example of hmmm makes you wonder.


----------



## GSDLoverII

Adding Casey to the list. She was 10.3 years young. 

Kaiser is fighting for his life with this dreaded disease now. He was diagnosed when he was 6 weeks shy of his 10th Bday.


----------



## GSDLoverII

*A retrospective study published in 1999 by Ware, et al, found a five times greater risk of cardiac hemangiosarcoma in spayed vs. intact female dogs and a 2.4 times greater risk of hemangiosarcoma in neutered dogs as compared to intact males.*

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hemangiosarcoma


----------



## obxterra

GSDLover:

Interesting, Jaz is the only GSD I've had that was spayed (or neutered, for that matter).


----------



## GSDLoverII

Just goes to show you that they just don't know.
But I truly believe that there is some common thread.....
JUST WHAT?


----------



## GSDLoverII

I was googling around and found this link.
Interesting...
Hemangiosarcoma in GSDs...Do you know of any particular lines it runs in? - Page 1 - German Shepherd Dog


----------



## GSDLoverII

And this linK:
Search Results


----------



## LisaT

Thank you Rebel and GSDLoverII :hugs:

Max was 3 1/2 months shy of 11, but he had an extended illness that hit him hard when he was about 9, 9 1/2. I found some reference to angiosarcoma in humans, some case studies where the humans did not feel well some time before the cancer was visible. This might have been the case with max. 

I continue to wonder, if the increased radiation releases (Fukushima) have weakened those that were the most weakest. Some human sites link angiosarcomas to radiation exposure and also some particular chemicals (one site said vinyl chloride, arsenic, and thorium dioxide), which certainly could be the case. 

The roll call continues to grow :tears: I miss my boy ver much, and I know everyone in this thread knows exactly how I feel


----------



## GSDLoverII

chipmenot-scientific-evidence

Maybe Micro-Chips???


----------



## GSDLoverII

The roll call continues to grow :tears: I miss my boy ver much, and I know everyone in this thread knows exactly how I feel  


I know how you feel. I am devastated. 
I am so sorry.


----------



## middleofnowhere

Sigh. No microchip in my HS girl. All but the current bitch have been spayed at under 1 yo. Only one died of hemangio. (5 total females)

Look at the environment - look at what we throw in the trash, what gets hauled in the trash trucks that our dogs then walk on the pavement afterward. (Tube TVs had all sorts of bad stuff in them, batteries, lawn care products, synthetic carpets, junk we polish the floors with, junk we wash bedding with, junk in their treats, junk in the air they breath. I strongly suspect that we are poisoning our pets along with everything else (including ourselves.) 

Before blaming current radiation accidents, look at the radiation intentionals (tests) of the 1940s & 1950s -


----------



## LisaT

middleofnowhere said:


> Before blaming current radiation accidents, look at the radiation intentionals (tests) of the 1940s & 1950s -


No doubt that's part of it. In radiation tests by Berekly after fukushima near here, they found radiation measurements down to 6" in the soil. They believe that was not recent radiation, but from weapons testing and, who knows, we have a dismantled nuclear power plant not far from here. Insult upon injury perhaps, I watched the radiation spikes as it moved through  . Lots of dogs on lots of forums lately 

I also agree with the environmental issues. The assaults are so many...

No chip in my boy, neutered at about 18 months.


----------



## IDEAS

I know this thread is a year old and I am so saddened to read of the loss of so many wonderful dogs to this horrible stealth cancer. I hadn't planned on making this my introduction to the group, but I had to stop and read the posts.

I lost my sweet baby boy, my beautiful, rescue gsd, Sammy, who was only 7 when he died of hemangiosarcoma on February 21st , just over a month ago. It was a sudden and completely unexpected loss, but the cancer had metastasized and was in his spleen, liver, lungs and possibly his heart, and he gave no sign of being ill. Like almost everyone else who posted, there were no signs and no chance to do anything for him. He seemed a little "off" so I took him to the vet thinking it might be the beginning of arthritis; they found nothing and 2 weeks later he passed a "wellness exam" though the vet remarked his gums seemed a bit pale. 

Ten hours later I was at the emergency vet with Sammy; he was found to be badly anemic with clotting/platelet problems and the vets were afraid to aspirate to determine if it was hemangiosarcoma or possibly lymphoma. Even with 3 transfusions over 3 days, his blood wouldn't start clotting properly; I would have done anything for him, anything, but I had to let him go. I never thought he wouldn't be here with me and his fursibs this spring and for years to come. He is in my heart forever, and I miss him terriby.


----------



## GSDBESTK9

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too lost my boy at 7 this past Nov. I miss him so much.


----------



## LisaT

IDEAS said:


> I know this thread is a year old and I am so saddened to read of the loss of so many wonderful dogs to this horrible stealth cancer. I hadn't planned on making this my introduction to the group, but I had to stop and read the posts.....


Welcome, and I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs: My boy was lost on 2/7/12 to the same.....the thread was started nearly a year ago, but the losses continue, and this is a thread to honor them, and remind us of this terrible beast.. It's an awful disease, usually striking w/o warning and nothing that we can do. 

We miss them terribly


----------



## Klaus My Love

LisaT said:


> Welcome, and I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs: My boy was lost on 2/7/12 to the same.....the thread was started nearly a year ago, but the losses continue, and this is a thread to honor them, and remind us of this terrible beast.. It's an awful disease, usually striking w/o warning and nothing that we can do.
> 
> We miss them terribly



First, I'd like to thank everyone for your posts. I started this thread almost a year ago after I loss my Klaus in hopes to find some relief for the sadness and confusion I felt having to say goodbye so quickly and having no idea what this cancer was really about. Over the year I have been following everyone's comments and stories, and this has helped tremendously to let me know that we are not alone, and to call attention to this dreadful disease. 

I agree - this thread is certainly an honor to them. My heart goes out to all of you who have shared your loss with the group. I think about Klaus every day - I still miss him terribly. I hope that this thread continues as a source for those who need this kind of support as well.


----------



## jetscarbie

My vet uttered this word yesterday "Hemangiosarcoma" 

I was so confused, I made him write the word down. When he did and I seen the word, I said "What? I've seen this word before on the German Shepherd board I read. It usually just effects GSD's, right?

He said that a few years ago he would agree with that statement, but things are changing. He said that he is seeing tons of different breeds, cats and dogs, dying quickly from this cancer. He says it's like a fast moving train and the animal is stuck on the track with hardly any way to get off.

My cat was put to sleep yesterday, diagnosed with Feline HSA. It happened very quickly. My cat's stomach swelled. I thought at first it was roundworms. Then I rushed him to the vet with the white gums. Then I worried for a few days (while cat was hooked up to IV's) that it was bloat. Then I was told "no"...cancer. But I wouldn't know for sure until the cancer vet looked at the test.

I opted for the exploratory surgery *hoping* it might be some kind of small mass that could be removed. It was widespread. 

My vet and the vet specialist talked to me for awhile yesterday afternoon. I ask if my GSD's could catch this or if maybe one had this and my cat caught it. I know....probably a stupid question but you do have to wonder. I was told that there no was no way nor any proof that suggested that this is a contiguous thing. They did say it was somewhat rare in cats but they are seeing an increased numbers. (things that make you go hummmmm?)

I don't know. I am feeling very worried.

How weird is that I have 3 GSD's.....but my cat ended up with cancer that is known to be a GSD thing?



> There appear to be four main types of hemangiosarcoma in cats:
> 
> Dermal (in the skin)
> Subcutaneous (under the skin)
> Visceral (involving internal organs)
> Oral (usually growing from the gums)
> Recent studies indicate that the dermal and subcutaneous forms are the most common. These forms have a predisposition to developing on the head, which suggests that sun exposure is a risk factor. For the dermal and subcutaneous forms of feline hemangiosarcoma, surgical removal is the chief form of therapy and is the most likely to be curative for dermal forms. Subcutaneous hemangiosarcomas are more difficult to remove completely and have a 60% recurrence rate after surgery. The visceral form is the most aggressive form with approximately 30% of cats being far gone enough to warrant euthanasia at the time of initial diagnosis (or having already died with the diagnosis being made on a post-mortem exam).


----------



## chloe'smom

*Cause for Splenetic Mass in Dogs?*

Hi Everyone,
I'm a new member as of maybe 30 mins ago. I lost my baby girl (about a month ago), Sophie, who had just turned 6 to this and I'm devasted. I miss her terribly.

Now I have Chloe, 12 weeks old, who is showing early signs of fear aggression and I really have my work cut out for me, trying to get her past this. I still have to wait 5 more weeks for full immunity to parvo and distemper before I can do much socializing, so am working on basic obedience for now.

I'm so sorry about your loss, jetscarbie.


----------



## chloe'smom

Klaus My Love said:


> Hello to the forum. I registered in hopes that there may be more loving pet owners with a similar situation and who may be able to direct me to the latest sources of information regarding Hemangiosarcoma. I lost my boy Klaus on Sunday evening to this horrible disease. I brought him into the vet for what I believed to be a stomach issue, only to be told that he was dying of a large tumor that had ruptured in his spleen - and the cause was most certainly HSA. Given the severity and intensity of the bleed, I was forced to decide then and there to opt for surgery or euthanasia. Given how bad the bleed had become, and the poor prognosis, I opted for the later in hopes I spared him any more pain and discomfort. It was the most painful experience I could have been faced with. I have done a considerable amount of research online, in between my moments of complete grief, to comprehend how something like this could have occurred so quickly as he was already being treated regularly for arthritis with blood tests and x-rays - which showed no tumor a month ago. While it appears that this form of cancer is prevalent among shepherds and golden retrievers, it is of little comfort given the lack of time that I was given to say goodbye to the one thing I held most dear in my life.
> 
> Klaus was a rescue dog, who experienced a traumatic first year and a half of his life before we found each other. I was fortunate enough to have had him for six years - though at this time I do believe that it was he who rescued me. It is believed he was a german shepherd/golden mix. One day, when I recover from this major loss, I fully intend to adopt a shepherd or shepherd golden mix once again as he was truly the best of both breeds and a kind loving soul. But, before I do, I was hopeful to gain as much knowledge as I can about this cancer if I am expected to face it again.
> 
> Any thoughts or sources of information/stories would be most appreciated.


My heart goes out to you and anyone who's gone through this.


----------



## craig j

I just lost my beloved Steffi to this terrible cancer. 10 yrs. old from Westside G.S. rescue as are our other two. Special vet hospital on June 7th made the diagnosis; by the 14th poor Steffi couldn't eat or move. Steffi also had some allergies (thinning hair) and had arthritis too but she was still a very, very special girl, I had been gently carrying her up the stairs for a long time. We hired a vet to come to our home to put her to sleep so her last moments would be at home. I told her over and over to go to sleep that it was all right and I was with her and I'd be looking for her on the other side but she didn't want to go. Now I'm basically done with life but I have to go on for my wife and our other two dogs. I've never had such a sensitive best friend as that dog.
My heart goes out too to all of you that have had to go through this terrible experience with our best buddies.


----------



## chloe'smom

I'm so sorry, Craig J. When I took my girl in, I saw a new vet first. She didn't tell me what she suspected and sent us back home with over $100 worth of medicine and the hope that she was going to be okay. A week later, I made an appt with a vet that I trust, in the same office and that was when I got the diagnosis. Four hours later she was put down. I didn't even know my last week with her was possibly our last week. I'll never forgive that vet for that!


----------



## Zeeva

reminds me of a magnet i have for my car. sorry for your loss. bless you.


----------



## juliejujubean

i am sorry for your loss


----------



## kindofabigdealsmom

So sorry, Craig j. We all know how the heartbreak feels. Just know that eventually it will grow less painful and that she is always with you in spirit. I don't know if you are a reader, but it might help to read "A Dog's Purpose." Quite popular right now--you can get it at Sam's, Walmart, etc.


----------



## craig j

Thanks very much; ordered the book, maybe it will help.
I'm afraid Steffi might have been a once in a lifetime dog; totally people oriented, super-sensitive to my every mood or even a change in my breathing; the most sensitive (and needy but I didn't mind!) dog I've ever known; I'm 52 and have been around dogs my whole life.
At the special vet's office when they brought out my little girl for me to take her home; frail and tired and legs trembling, she looked scared and lost in the unfamiliar vets office; it was around the corner so she didn't see me at first; I walked to her and knelt down and supported her and hugged her for a long time, she slowly wagged her tail while I hugged her. I brought her home and took time off from work to be with her and she only lasted another week.
I have a huge amount of sadness, depression, and anger over losing her but I have to keep it together for the other two; and the ones I'll rescue in the future.
I've been a consistent donator to Westside G.S. Rescue but I think i'll be doing even more for them now.


----------



## GSDLoverII

Kaiser's Thread
http://www.germanshepherds.com/forum/health-issues/174707-kaiser-has-hemangiosarcoma-heart.html
Maybe it can help somebody else out.
I miss Kaiser, Casey and Gypsy everyday.
I wish I could say it's getting easier, but it is not.
3 dogs dead in 6 months 
2 with hemangiosarcoma. 
R.I.P. until we meet again.


----------



## JazzyLuv

I am with you, Klaus...we lost our Jazzy to this awful disease in January, and I was so grateful to find this forum, its helped me so much, everyone has been wonderful, like I have my own circle of friends who understand exactly what Im going thru...It sucks being part of this 'club,' but at the same time its nice to know that Im not alone...You arent alone, Klaus, thats for sure! =)


----------



## Klaus My Love

JazzyLuv said:


> I am with you, Klaus...we lost our Jazzy to this awful disease in January, and I was so grateful to find this forum, its helped me so much, everyone has been wonderful, like I have my own circle of friends who understand exactly what Im going thru...It sucks being part of this 'club,' but at the same time its nice to know that Im not alone...You arent alone, Klaus, thats for sure! =)


jazzy luv - i am glad you were able to find the forum. it is amazing how many of us there are. i check back periodically - especially those times when i can't get the experience out of my mind - and it seems that the stories are relentless. i do understand what you went and are going through. thank you for sending a comment .... that was very kind of you.


----------



## YashasDad

*Yasha's Ordeal*

I have been reading your thread and thinking over my own situation. My boy was diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma this morning, and worst of all the prognosis is poor. He has mets to the liver, lungs, and spleen. The most cruel part of this - is that my champ is as happygolucky. When I visited him this morning he was yearning to leave, he was bumping his nose to me pointing out where the lock was. The ER doc tells me he is not a primary for surgery, he has had his 8 years and that I could have not known. I am searching my mind for a solution but I am betrayed by my grief. Do I take him home and have him die with me, spend what ever time giving him anything he wants. Do I opt in for this surgery...take out his spleen, part of his liver....and lymph nodes and put in then on chemo. If I choose not to proceed, am I doing this out of love for my dog, or am I taking away his only fighting chance? I am faced with a choosing the lesser of two evils..my heart is so heavy with guilt I just cant seem to make the "right" choice for my sweet, sweet boy.


----------



## Chicagocanine

I am sorry you have to make such a terrible decision. I am dealing with hemangiosarcoma with my dog right now and I have found this group to be very helpful: TheSumnerFoundation : The Sumner fnd fighting Hemangiosarcoma


They also have a loss support group: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/SumnerFoundationSupport/


----------



## RebelGSD

This is the link to our story and treatment history

http://www.germanshepherds.com/forum/loving-memory/105191-please-say-prayer-my-boy-hs.html


----------



## Klaus My Love

YashasDad said:


> I have been reading your thread and thinking over my own situation. My boy was diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma this morning, and worst of all the prognosis is poor. He has mets to the liver, lungs, and spleen. The most cruel part of this - is that my champ is as happygolucky. When I visited him this morning he was yearning to leave, he was bumping his nose to me pointing out where the lock was. The ER doc tells me he is not a primary for surgery, he has had his 8 years and that I could have not known. I am searching my mind for a solution but I am betrayed by my grief. Do I take him home and have him die with me, spend what ever time giving him anything he wants. Do I opt in for this surgery...take out his spleen, part of his liver....and lymph nodes and put in then on chemo. If I choose not to proceed, am I doing this out of love for my dog, or am I taking away his only fighting chance? I am faced with a choosing the lesser of two evils..my heart is so heavy with guilt I just cant seem to make the "right" choice for my sweet, sweet boy.


Dear YashasDad - I just wanted to let you know that you and especially your boy are in my thoughts. I know its hard and we know there is no easy way to work through this. Its a strange killer of a disease that is very unexpected. But, I hope it helps you to know you are not alone. And from the bottom of my heart, I truly believe that the decision that you make, whichever choice you make, will the the "right" one. I know this because it is a very personal decision, done with much thought and consideration, and it will be made with extreme love for him. I took a look at the Sumner Foundation and that is a great resource. I will look out on this forum for any further updates ... you both are in my prayers.


----------



## Zeus2004

*2nd GSD gone*

First GSD died suddenly at 11. Vet assumed it was hemangiosarcoma of the heart. We couldn't afford tests to verify. He died at home within 10 minutes of collapsing.
I was so depressed. I finally decided to visit his breeder. Waited about 2 months and adopted Zeus. 
He was a real healthy GSD. He just turned 8 on Oct 8, 2012. Got sick 4 days later and died Saturday of that week. 
We had him put down, as he had internal bleeding out of both ends. Vet could feel a mass on his spleen. Vet assumed it was hemangiosarcoma again.
Poor baby, he didn't know what hit him. He was awake, but so weak.
I had to take a week off work. I couldn't stop crying.
3 weeks. We called him 'Goofy' as he was a goofball. 'Zeus' when he was in trouble.
Don't know if I can bear loving another GSD and going through this again.
Sandy


----------



## Zeus2004

Updated Signature, but didn't work.

GSD Augie 7-1993 to 9-2004
GSD Zeus 10-2004 to 10-2012

Cats gone in past year:
Kiki Siamese 16
Daisy Calico 17
Jynx DLH black only 10 from CRF

Kitties now:
Blue, Gray, DLH, 12
Lily, Seal Point Siamese, 1
Luna, Liliac Point Siamese, 6 months (a rescue)
Cosmo, DHL jet black, 5 months (a rescue)


----------



## Chicagocanine

Zeus2004 said:


> Don't know if I can bear loving another GSD and going through this again.
> Sandy


I know how you feel, I feel the same after losing Bianca last month, she was my first GSD although I always loved the breed, and wanted one since I was a kid...but I just don't know if I could go through this again with another GSD.
I lost my previous two dogs to different types of cancer (within 3 months of each other in 2008), and it was very difficult but I think the toll of hemangiosarcoma has been even harder for me even though I had almost two months with Bianca after her splenectomy.


----------



## Saphire

I hear you both............I too love the GSD but having lost Floyd to Hemangiosarcoma was so devastating to my entire family that we are having a difficult time with the getting another GSD.
I have been searching all breeds that have simular traits minus many of the GSD health issues. This cancer is not something breeders can test for......yet. If there was a way I could feel confident I wouldn't run into this devastating disease again I would most definately get another GSD.


----------



## Lars1

*Lars*

Unfortunately we lost our beautiful boy Lars to this awful disease eight days ago. We had a similar experience to most. He was happy and playing on Sunday and on Tuesday afternoon we had to say goodbye. I too feel the crushing guilt like I should have known something was wrong. He woke me up in the middle of the night on Sunday which he rarely did, but I thought maybe he had an upset tummy and needed to go out. He came back in and went to bed. 
On Monday morning, he was slow but ate breakfast and went outside. I thought his arthritis was acting up so he didn't feel good. I checked on him at lunch and he was slow and didn't want to go out, but he met me at the door. I went back to work thinking he just needed to rest, but when my husband came home at 400, he was lying in the kitchen and didn't react to him at all. He had to carry him to the car. 
We took him to our vet who saw his spleen was enlarged in an xray, but didn't have an ultrasound to get further detail, so we went to an emergency vet. She had an ultrasound and could see fluid in his abdomen and around his heart. We then took him to Tufts near Boston for a more detailed exam, and were given this horrific diagnosis. 
He had a massive cancerous tumor on his heart which was in operable and had burst, filling his pericardium with blood restricting his heart from beating. They drained the blood and he felt a little better but we were told that he could go at anytime and likely would not make it overnight,so our decision was made for us, but it doesn't make it any easier. He was put to rest with his head in my husbands lap and me nose to nose with him. The hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I love my boy with all my being and money or distance were never a hindrance to treatment. He had several other conditions and we always did whatever it took even if it meant major debt. I am devastated that there was no coming back from this one.
I'm so sorry and my heart goes out to everyone in this thread who has lost their beloved angel. Our boy was a week short of his 10th birthday, but we are trying to be positive because he was such a silly, happy boy and we have his 8 year old sister to take care of. After all, we figure he wouldn't want us sitting around crying all the time when his sister needs to play. What a horrible disease this is.


----------



## Cassidy's Mom

I am SO sorry about your loss of Lars. He sounds like a very special dog. :hugs:


----------



## Lars1

Thank you so much. He was a special boy and is now our little angel.


----------



## Klaus My Love

In reading your story, it sounds extremely similar to my own. Klaus too dealt with bad arthritis at a young age so I assumed he was having complications. When I discovered what was really the cause, it was too late. I am so sorry for your loss. I truly am as I know it is tough, heart breaking and frustrating. I hope you take comfort in knowing you did all you could for your boy. 





Lars1 said:


> Thank you so much. He was a special boy and is now our little angel.


----------



## NancyJ

My sincere condolences. There are many of us in the HSA club I am sad to say. My Grim, Toby, and Cyra all died from HS before their time. ........ For those who have a diagnosis but have not said goodbye, please follow the links on the modiano labs website to submit samples ......... Broad Institute is trying to establish a genetic pattern in the GSD since there does seem to be more of a tendency in the breed. 

http://modianolab.org/Modiano%20Lab%20Wish%20List%20Template.pdf


----------



## Frannie

I have a dog that was just diagnosed with dermal HSA.
Does anyone here know if the supplement Fresh Factors would be beneficial
to her? It contains nutritional yeast (yeast culture).
I've read so many different opinions, I have no idea if I should give it to her or not.


----------



## AOlivera

*Lost my Jarko*

Lost my boy, Jarko (7), too fast too soon, yesterday (12/16/13) to hemangiosarcoma. Devastated, heartbroken, shocked...no symptoms, signs or any indication that his body was suffering internally until i went to play fetch with him. Threw the ball-he went after it and just stood there. i knew instantly something was wrong...i called him back and he didn't respond. I walked towards him and said "lets go home", he'll usually perk up and will start to trot, but got no response. I felt his legs in case of injury but felt nothing out of the ordinary. Felt his stomach and noticed it was really full. After a few steps he laid down on the snow not wanting to move. I carried him to the car and straight to the Vet. After ultrasound and x-ray, Dr suspected cancer on the spleen. Abdomen was full of fluid. The stress of the surgery was too much for his heart. Spleen, Liver and heart had clusters of cancer.


----------



## loulabelle23

Awk people stop im gonna cry we lost our lee to liver failure and his organs shut down broke my heart hard but it will be easier 

Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## FrankRSalatino

We lost our beloved GSD Pescha to this horrible disease in February of this year. She was 13 years old and we took her to Cornell where we made the painful decision to let her go. They are the most compassionate group of professionals that we ever met. Pescha died in my arms and I still miss her terribly. I feel your pain, believe me and I am so very sorry for your loss and pain. We have decided to get another GSD next year. Take care.

Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## fjrocktoy

I lost my girl, Chablis, to this yesterday. I am utterly heartbroken. 4.5 months ago, she lost her appetite, so I took her into the vet. They found an enlarged spleen. Rushed her 2 hours away for emergency splendectomy. They did not find spread to any other organs during the surgery. However, the results came back hemangiosarcoma. My vet said that it's very rare for them to not find spread at her stage (due to how large the spleen was), so I had hope that we may have longer than the general 3-6 months post-surgery prognosis given. I took her in every 2-4 weeks for blood workups and physical exams, as she also had kidney dysfunction. She had been doing awesome post-surgery. Tons of energy and so playful. Then, a couple of nights ago, she was having me kick her ball for her to chase, per usual. 2 hours later, she was walking very slow and it was clear to me she did not feel well. I had just given their monthly heartguard / frontline, so I was hoping that somehow she had a reaction to that, although she has been on the same brands her whole life. The next morning she was still walking very slowly, so I took her in. We finally got her kidney levels worked out, but she showed to be very anemic. Chest xray was clear, but abdominal ultrasound showed a mass on her liver that was bleeding out. They gave her IV's and a transfusion to get her feeling better, but I knew we couldn't do anything else for her. If we tried surgery again, it would just spread elsewhere and we'd be back in this position soon. It was time to let her go. 

I thought that by being prepared and knowing this was on the horizon would make it easier to let go. It has not. I work from home and was with her 24/7. I miss her smile. I miss her energy. I miss her super sweet disposition. I miss her beautiful eyes. I miss saying her name. 

She was only 7 3/4. I never considered NOT always having GSD's, but I don't know if I can do this again. Apparently her brother died of what is likely the same thing at age 5. 

My previous GSD had hip dysplasia. Chablis and her parents were certified to have good hips, so I thought I had dodged that bullet. I thought dysplasia was so terrible before, but at least my GSD, Nala, had been able to live to a ripe, old age. My Chablis still had so much life left, so much love to give, and so many squirrels to terrorize. I miss my girl.


----------



## fjrocktoy




----------



## fomas1

*most loveing , loveable fellow*

Sorry to say we lost our Casey Jones 11yr4mth boy on 2/4/14. Had a ruptured tumor on the spleen . During dec was urinating under the Christmas tree. Took to the vet got some antibiotics and was doing lot better and all the lab test were perfect. Than one day didn't want to eat , but he done that before when he was younger thought nothing of it. He had arthritis so his lack of movement I thought was do to a arthritis do to the cold weather . Monday the forth early on the morning urinated twice at 5,6 am thought the urine had came back.I went back sleep at 7 am . wife got up at 10 am. She came and got me at 11am dog was sitting in the back yard under his favorite tree and would not get up. Brought him in and he sat again not getting up. He did get up a few times walked very short distances like a couple of feet. Made a vet apt for 430pm. Got there examined him vet said his in trouble,xray ruptured tumor on spleen. Lost lots of blood. Vet said age and everything we were looking was most likely  hemangiosarcoma or way more then likely. so we pts to stop the suffering. worst thing ever.If you go through this its not your fault.T


----------



## K9POPPY

My deepest sorrow to all who have experienced this terrible disease to their beloved GSD's. We have been through this many times and yes, it is so unfair. Sometimes memories are all that gets us through it- Thinking of you that are hearing the news, my deepest sympathies to you- Bob


----------



## Susan_GSD_mom

To all of you who have lost a piece of your hearts to this horrible, horrible disease...
I cry with all my heart for each one of you. We have lost two GSDs to this wicked disease, so you are not alone. I have attached a photo of my Cesar, whom we lost in December. My beautiful, beautiful sweet boy, I miss him so much.

Susan


----------



## SavingDora

I wish I would have found this place sooner. What a wonderful website this is. 

My story parallels many of the other stories here. My wife and I rescued our GSD when she was 2 1/2. But what really happened is that she rescued us. Filling a void in our empty nest once our two daughters grew up and left. 

I knew something was wrong with Dora Tuesday night. Took her to the emergency animal hospital where we were suddenly and unexpectedly faced with the decision to either put her down right then, or risk surgery as she was bleeding internally from a ruptured tumor on her spleen. We were completely devastated. We couldn't pull the trigger...I pretty much begged them to do everything possible to save her.

She made it through the surgery and is recovering from that right now. She seems to be doing better with each passing day. My world crashed again last night when the doctor called me and confirmed she does in fact have this same horrible disease so many of you have dealt with before. I haven't told my wife yet about this. It will be another devastating blow. 

Dora is an amazing therapy dog. Our lives literally revolve around her. I'm fortunate to have an employer that allows us to bring dogs to work. She's with me 24-7. The girls in the office absolutely adore her. During the evenings we take her to the hospital so she can do her magic with the staff and patients. The therapeutic value she brings is incredible and immeasurable. We are blown away with each visit. She lights up the room and makes everyone forget their troubles with the love she brings.

This is breaking my heart. I don't what to do.


----------



## middleofnowhere

I'm sorry Dora has this. The late Barker the Younger came down with this one summer. She had her spleen removed at that time & we started chemo. That gave us another 6 months before she had another bleed.
I wish I could offer more comfort but that was our reality. That was about 5 years ago so treatment may now be more successful.


----------



## Jedi111

*My dog had hemangiosarcoma, a miracle so far...*

Jedi, my beautiful 7yo German Shepherd (and best friend) has been an absolute joy and a member of the family in every sense. In Sept of last year I noticed an internal growth between his belly and back leg. I had to travel for 1 week and when I came back the mass was tripled in size, I could not believe it. Took it to the Vet who immediately suspected Hemangiosarcoma and told me that if confirmed, the dog probably had two months to live. Did a biopsy and the Hemangio was confirmed. Devastated I went home and broke the news to my wife and kids. We got Jedi when he was 2 months old so my kids consider him a brother, who protects them like crazy.. Went to a different and well known Vet for a second opinion and second biopsy and the Hemangio was confirmed, they also gave him 60 days max. I decided to have the large tumor surgically removed, because it was growing at an incredible rate, and it could have ruptured at any time. Surgery was done and Jedi started his recovery period of 3 weeks with discomfort but still playing with the kids and being the Jedi we knew. Both Vets had told me that when a large Hemangio develops on the blood vessels in the skin tissues, very possibly has already developed also in his spleen and probably heart. These masses would rupture at any time killing him very fast and with a lot of pain. They told me we could remove the spleen to buy 3-4 more months, but that was the most he could get. The whole family was destroyed by these thoughts and the kids were crying every day. I decided to have an ultrasound done just because I wanted to see with my eyes the tumors in his spleen and elsewhere, but he was completely clear...! The Vet was very surprised, it was the first time that this had happened. I called the other Vet and they also could not believe it. Both Vets said that this could be a rare case of Hemangio genetically programmed to show up only on a skin level. They told me however, that the cancer could and very possibly would develop somewhere else in his body subcutaneously, and for me to keep checking for abnormal little bumps and growths. That was about 1 year ago and Jedi has never been healthier. The cancer has not returned so far, and we have been enjoying him every single day, more than ever. Just wanted to share his story to give hope to people that are in this situation. I insisted in doing the ultrasound because I wanted to see with my eyes. Listen to your Vet but also listen to your instinct and your heart.


----------



## Chief55

In Dec. 2005 my brothers 9yr old GSD had his spleen removed due to this terrible cancer. They found it very early so they had no idea on life expectancy. No chemo or radiation was done. Rudi passed away just two months shy of his 12th birthday in July 2008. Goes to show it can happen. He lived a good quality life up to the last month of so of his life.


----------



## zetti

My heart goes out to all of you who have lost a beloved dog to this monstrous disease.

I lost a much loved 4 yo rescue GSD. He had a tumor on his leg that actually showed up externally. Over Memorial Day Weekend, it went from golf ball to baseball size.

That's how fast & aggressive this monster is.

I had the tumor removed & had 6 more mos with my boy. He died peacefully, at home.

I am sorry for those of you who are dealing or have dealt with hemangio.


----------



## Otis J Spunkmeyer

*Otis J*

This cancer is a heartbreaker. My Oso picked me just over 10 years ago. He leaned into me and that was all it took. He was perfect in every way and we learned how to communicate without words. He went in for surgery to remove an abscess from a grass seed. The bleeding took a couple of days to stop post op. I thought that his arthritis meds had thinned his blood and perhaps gave him an ulcer. I only wish that had been the case. He insisted on going out with us to lunch a couple of days as he was first out the front door. As weak as he was, he would not take no for an answer. He hopped in the car and just sat under the table as we ate our meal with people making their usual comments about what a beautiful GSD he was. The next day, he hadn't moved when we woke up and we rushed him to the vet. where they put him on IVs to bring his temp. down and gave him fluids. At the end of the day, his RBC were still low so we took him to an ER vet. they gave him blood transfusions and then an ultrasound. The cancer was all over his spleen and liver. He was clearly out of juice and running only on fumes. We had to let him rest. The saddest day of our lives. But when you have had "the best dog ever", you have to let him rest. I can still see him on his bed panting and smiling at me. I miss him so very much. What a lousy disease.


----------



## Saphire

I'm so sorry yet another loved dog has syccumbed to this awful cancer. 
Hugzzz and it does get easier to remember.


----------



## pyratemom

We just got through a scare. We were lucky enough to have a good outcome and it was not Hemangio, proven by ultrasound for a good look. So sorry you are going through this. There is nothing worse than having a loved family member sick with something you can't cure or make better in any way for them. We just love them as long as we can and they love us right back:hug:.


----------



## RECON

*Hemangiosarcoma shattered our world*

Hey everyone  Just lost my 8 year old GSD on Tuesday, three days ago. Vet called today with results that all three biopsies were confirmed as HSA. He had gotten sick on Friday, wasn’t eating, and acted very tired and weak. We decided to take him to the emergency vet on Saturday. Regular exam and check up seemed to find nothing wrong and thought this was just old age. However to ease our mind, the vet recommended bloodwork, x-rays and ultrasound. Results were not good reporting the tumor appeared to be huge involving the spleen. Bloodwork wasn’t normal but also wasn’t that bad so splenectomy was recommended which would confirm the diagnosis but told us that WITH the surgery we would maybe get six more months but WITHOUT surgery he would bleed out at any moment. There was no way we were going to let that happen if he had a chance so surgery was scheduled for Tues and drs orders were to take him home and spoil him. So that is exactly what we did as well as take a ton of pictures with him, slept beside him every night and loved on him as much as possible. By the time Tuesday (surgery day) rolled around he was acting like he was a 2 year old puppy again. Jumping up on my kids, anxious for the car ride, and just happy and energetic as can be. So as you can imagine we never expected the events that followed not even two hours later. The vet called and said it had spread and surgery wasn’t even an option due to the size, location and risks involved. We had to make a decision on the spot and it was honestly the hardest decision we have ever had to make. Our children are older so they fully understood what was happening and we physically felt our world shatter. My son said that it was easily the worst day of his life and I would have to agree. We had to think about what was best for our GSD and not be selfish although we desperately wanted just one more minute with our big boy to say goodbye. But per our request, the vet never woke him up and he passed away peacefully. We are happy he was happy but it makes it harder on us because he didn’t seem to be suffering last time we were together. This all just happened so fast with no signs as everyone else is explaining. Now I wonder how long he was in pain and what we could we have done differently. He was such an awesome addition to our family and now we are all finding it difficult to even come home without him here. Our hearts are broken and we miss him so much  If only we could have caught it sooner. I am reading some vets recommend GSD and GR get yearly x-rays after age 5. Not sure if my family can endure this pain again, but if we ever get another GSD, I will definitely recommend this to my vet. I have read all the stories on here and my heart breaks for all of you. This is very tough and I hope the pain quickly goes away and only the happy memories remain.


----------



## Saphire

I know and feel your pain. I lost my boy just shy of 7 years old. Please know this is a painless cancer and nothing you could have done would have changed the outcome.
I am so very sorry for your loss and in time you will be able to remember him without feeling all the pain of losing him but instead smile about the joy he brought you.
I too thought I couldn't bear losing another dog in the future. I did get another handsome boy and he is a joy and has helped to fill the void.


----------



## pyratemom

Recon - I feel your pain. It is never easy to lose a loved one. But please know he was not in pain and he appreciated those last few days of spoiling and being close to you. He will always live on in your heart as German Shepherds leave paw prints on our hearts but know that one day you will meet again at the Rainbow Bridge. As for deciding whether to get another of the same breed, most of us do because we realize what a great breed it is and what wonderful hearts they have. It may not be something you do right away but GSDs are kind of like chips it's hard to have just one. One day maybe in the not too distant future, you will find the ability to love another dog and there are always dogs that need rescuing. Meanwhile, be kind to yourself and take time to heal. :hugs:


----------



## Linda1270

I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of your boy. From your post, he sounds like he was a wonderful companion to you and your family. I hope that memories of happy times you shared together comfort you in the days ahead. It's never easy to loose a beloved pet. Take care of yourself.


----------



## Sonny2727

I just had to share my deep hearted condolences for your very painful loss! I shed tears over this! 
I can't imagine how I would deal with this disease if it took my boy, Thunder.


----------



## rjstrotz

*I Share Your Grief*

6.1.15
Dear Klaus' Parent
I was just now looking through the posts and I ran across yours. My 13 year old, 85 pound gorgeous blond boy GoldenDoodle BECKET passed away in our home on December 11, 2009 from hemangiosarcoma. After I noticed that he was lethargic and not wanting to move in July, 2009 I took him to the emergency hospital where they ran tests and did an ultrasound and he was diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma. It showed up as tumors in his spleen.

My Becket underwent chemotherapy and he tolerated it well and his quality of life was good. My vet told me that he would live maximum for another 4 months, and that the first treatments would discover whether he could tolerate the chemo and have a good quality of life. He did tolerate the treatments and we made the most of our last months with him.

The saving grace was having more time to be with him and also the fact that death from this illness is not painful (per the vet). We were told that in the end, Becket would collapse from exhaustion (due to an internal bleed), fall asleep and pass. I was with him after he came into the house after what would be his last romp in the backyard. He came inside and collapsed. I helped him to his bed and he closed his eyes, raising his head one last time to see me, rested his head back on the bed and passed quietly, peacefully and painlessly.

He passed with dignity.


----------



## alsatian5

*Response a long time after the fact...*

Hi,
I wish I would have seen this when you first posted it, as I too have been in your shoes, twice. Two GSD half sisters (same father) one year apart litters. The oldest was age 7 and the picture of GSD health, the "picture". We played frisbee that morning and had a normal energy packed day. Several hours later I was upstairs when I heard my daughter screaming, as blood was pouring from Tesla's nose. We ran to the emergency vet who took some x-rays, other diagnostics and other tests after the bleed stopped and had us make an appointment with a specialist for the next morning. The emergency vet warned me she suspected Haemangiosarcoma, but up until that day I didn't have much experience. The websites I found that night were not very encouraging. I was devastated. The next morning the specialist redid tests and new ones and confirmed that my dog's spleen was shot essentially and not only that she was able to show me that my dog's entire insides were riddled with cancer. I had to let her go. She was only seven, I thought I had so much more time. It was absolutely gut wrenching. A year later I walk downstairs in the morning to see two giant puddles right next to each other, the smell was hideous (both were rectangle shaped puddles, about 2' in width and 6' long, about 6" apart. One was blood and the other was a golden colored granulated substance that looked like nothing I had ever seen before. I had two dogs left, and one looked fine but the half-sister to my other GSD who had died a year before looked a little bit drowsy, but other than that she was fine, she ate, she drank and had a day of play the day prior. Off to the specialist we went. I was shocked when we saw the images showing the same **** cancer, only in her, her whole spleen had actually dissolved. I had to say goodbye to her that day as well. I lost two perfect dogs (other than genetics) to that **** disease. I am so sorry for your loss and I remain paranoid with all my GSDs regarding this disease, one of so many that my breed of choice is prone to.


----------



## fpath

Hi All,

I sadly join this group with a broken heart. I just put my beloved "Tinker Bell", to rest at 10 yrs 14 days. She was a Christmas Day babe and gave many years of loving and loyal service. She stopped eating on the Sunday night, I put it down to starting her on Gulcosamine. She went to the Vet, the next morning and I was told, most prob just upset stomach. Three days later all I could get her to do was eat out of my wife's hand. She still went for her walks and sort of played, but she wasn't 100%. I returned to the vet on the Thursday morning, not content with just an upset stomach. It was at this time the vet notice a sudden on set of AF. This then went to bloods, ECG and Xrays. 2 Hours later I was called to attend Vet office. I could see on the vet's face no good news. I read the Xrays and blood results, Primary in the spleen, enlarged heart with secondary in right ventricle and what looked like secondary in the liver, it hit me like a brick. I was so numb and cold. I asked for advice and was told my decision, but eventually told sooner rather than later and more like the following day. She was given "metacam", which made her comfortable, even though there was no sign of discomfort. She ate well out of the wife's hand, went for her walks albeit slow and deliberate, played some games and had her companion friend stay over for the night. The next day was long and hard, but as the time approached, it became unbearable. She was the perfect family member, so gentle, sweet, loyal protective and over the top loving to us. All her feline friends came out to see her. It took nearly 4 minutes after the injection, she fought so hard to stay, but I know in my heart that it was the only thing I could do to such a lovely, kind sweet family member. She will always be in out hearts and memories. 

Lets hope some early tests can be found for our furry family members

FYI, regular check ups, best food possible, no toxins or other bad things and no hereditary issues, all her siblings, parents and grand parents had not suffered with this horrible disease . The Vet was outstanding in support and treatment.

Thank you for allowing me to vent


----------



## Saphire

fpath said:


> Hi All,
> 
> I sadly join this group with a broken heart. I just put my beloved "Tinker Bell", to rest at 10 yrs 14 days. She was a Christmas Day babe and gave many years of loving and loyal service. She stopped eating on the Sunday night, I put it down to starting her on Gulcosamine. She went to the Vet, the next morning and I was told, most prob just upset stomach. Three days later all I could get her to do was eat out of my wife's hand. She still went for her walks and sort of played, but she wasn't 100%. I returned to the vet on the Thursday morning, not content with just an upset stomach. It was at this time the vet notice a sudden on set of AF. This then went to bloods, ECG and Xrays. 2 Hours later I was called to attend Vet office. I could see on the vet's face no good news. I read the Xrays and blood results, Primary in the spleen, enlarged heart with secondary in right ventricle and what looked like secondary in the liver, it hit me like a brick. I was so numb and cold. I asked for advice and was told my decision, but eventually told sooner rather than later and more like the following day. She was given "metacam", which made her comfortable, even though there was no sign of discomfort. She ate well out of the wife's hand, went for her walks albeit slow and deliberate, played some games and had her companion friend stay over for the night. The next day was long and hard, but as the time approached, it became unbearable. She was the perfect family member, so gentle, sweet, loyal protective and over the top loving to us. All her feline friends came out to see her. It took nearly 4 minutes after the injection, she fought so hard to stay, but I know in my heart that it was the only thing I could do to such a lovely, kind sweet family member. She will always be in out hearts and memories.
> 
> Lets hope some early tests can be found for our furry family members
> 
> FYI, regular check ups, best food possible, no toxins or other bad things and no hereditary issues, all her siblings, parents and grand parents had not suffered with this horrible disease . The Vet was outstanding in support and treatment.
> 
> Thank you for allowing me to vent


I'm so sorry, it's never easy.


----------



## Magwart

Fpath, heartfelt condolences for your very sad loss. Too many of us have been there with this disease. I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## MythicMut

Jax's Mom said:


> I sorry for your loss. I lost my girl from this almost 2 years ago. I don't think they feel any pain from it, we had just come in from a walk where she ran around and played, she had never had a health concern in her life until 20 minutes before she died
> I too asked the vet if there was anything we could have done, he said even if you noticed it in the beginning, the prognosis isn't good and the treatment just causes more pain than good, and if the treatment is "successful", you only get an extra few months. He said with this disease, it really is best not to know. You get to enjoy each day with your dog, not knowing it's your last.


I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I have lost two to HS, 14 months apart, the most recent just last March (2015). Like Jax's Mom said, and three different vet's told me and literature I have read, the prognosis is not good. It's difficult not to try to second guess what you could have missed, done differently, etc but the fact is, it is an insidious and fast moving cancer. I hope someday they will find a viable way to test for it. Try to remember the good times you have shared with you beloved dog. It will honor her memory. Again, I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Magic

We just lost our companion dog Juno to this horrible disease. He has been fine in the morning running down the arena after his beloved ball. In the afternoon after a ball toss across the yard he staggered and lay flat for a minute or so. It was awful feeling to see him go down and know something bad was going on I couldn't do anything about. We took him to the emergency vet and the basics checked out fine temp., heart beat in both legs etc. but chest x-rays showed an enlarged heart. They did an echocardiogram which showed the hemangiosarcoma at the base of his heart. We did decide to remove the fluid and they did in the morning and did another echocardiogram in the evening to see if the fluid (blood) was filling that fast. It had not refilled so they gave us a Chinese herb that might help stop bleeding. The prognosis was either PTS or soon he would collapse and die due to the enlarged heart or bleed out. We decided to make an appointment to PTS in a week. And were very fortunate that he did well the entire time. We went to all his favorite hiking areas for flat hikes shorter hikes, and he got all his favorite foods and was completely spoiled. It was so sudden and unexpected. He was in such great shape and we had thought he would be a 15 year dog, but he didn't even even make 9 years by a few weeks. That extra week put into perspective what a big hole was going to be left when he was gone. It is always too fast, this was just too short too. Hemangiosarcoma is a horrible disease.


----------



## Traveler's Mom

I am very sorry for your loss of Juno. I can't find the words to adequately convey my feelings since my 9 year old boy Traveler was diagnosed with this disease on Jan 6. We are giving him anything and everything he wants or needs. We can only take a little comfort in that we had/have some extra time with them- to give a little extra love and to receive a lot of extra love in return.

Lynn & Traveler


----------



## Sindyeli

Reading all these storied makes me cry my heart out. They are so touching and all of you have suffered such pain in losing your friend(s). I wish you all find solace over time.

I might be joining you soon. Malik, almost 11, just got out of surgery an hour ago. Yesterday he wasn't well, and after a long vet visit, my hb and I opted for spleen removal. He also has some mass in his liver. Vet said he is recovering really well. But he did warn us there is a very strong chance the results of the lab will be HSA. I am crying right now because I read your posts and feel that I will lose him soon. 

I know it's premature, that tests may be negative, or if positive, that he may live a lot longer with a good treatment. I guess I'm preparing myself mentally in case he will not live and somehow your posts, if they make me sad, make me feel less alone.

Wishing you all well, and a long healthy HSA-free life to all our canine companions.


----------



## Traveler's Mom

I am so sorry to hear about Malik. You are definitely not alone. I will pray your boy will have a swift and sure recovery. 

All we can do is deal with what we are given and love our pups for as long as we are allowed to.

Lynn & Traveler


----------



## Sindyeli

Tests were positive. He has 1 to 2 months to live. I've been reading some posts to educate myself on options since we will not do chemiotherapy. I am grateful for this forum as I've also been able to connect with a holistic vet who consults over the phone, thanks to a forum member.
Very heavy heart, today....


----------



## barnyard

I'm so sorry.


----------



## Saphire

I used yunnan baiyao for the last couple weeks for my boy. He had already had some bleeds by this time. There is one shock pill in each box for just that purpose.


----------



## puffswami

Sorry to hear about. My condolences.


----------



## pyratemom

I'm so sorry about the diagnosis. It is never easy. We can only love them for as long as we are allowed before they leave us. May you have many good days ahead before sadder days. Praying for you and your dog's comfort.


----------



## crazyontrt

It is such a heartbreaking disease. I lost my sweet boy Maxx on November 9th. He was 12, and had taken him to the vet 2 days before he died. The vet thought he was having pain due to arthritis. She mentioned hemangiosarcoma, but it was low on her differential diagnosis. He was happy and playing up until the night he died. The only strange thing was I was going to work night shift and he wouldn't take a cookie from me - he always was up for a cookie. My husband stayed home with him. They fell asleep comfortably together. Then Maxx woke up at 0330 and he was passing. I made it home just in time to see my boy off and tell him how much I love him. I swear he waited for me. He was my one in a lifetime boy, my best friend and constant companion. I'm glad there was no decision to be made, if we had a vet on speed dial, they wouldn't have been able to make it to my house in time. He passed where he was comfortable and loved. Harder on us, but it was best for him and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Hugs to you all who have and are going through this. It is an awful disease.


----------



## Leaky6

I feel your pain! I lost my gsh on 2/12/16 to the same thing. I took him to the vet because he was limping and I thought he had slipped on ice outside only to find he was bleeding to death. We did have the emergency surgery to remove his spleen and he bounced back quickly and was like a puppy again, only to lose him one month later. This was devastating to our family and he can never be replaced. We have since learned that he may have been more "prone" to his disease because we neutered him!! The chances of him getting hemangiosarcoma is raised greatly when you alter your dog, especially german sherpherds. It has been two months now and I am thinking of getting another this fall but we will not neuter him but am looking into a vasectomy instead. Our boy was only 9 years old, acted like a puppy. No warning of cancer and once it hits it hits hard and quick, so sad....


----------



## vafa

I'm sick to my stomach. I lost my dear Namac yesterday to this horrendous cancer. He was 9 1/2. On June 18th I woke up in the morning and as I opened the back door, his brother darted out back and I felt my heart drop to the floor because I saw Namac not moving. I rushed to him and noticed his eyes following me as I approached, but when I reached him, he had stiff limbs, a locked jaw, and cold and pale gums. I screamed to my wife who was in bed, "Namac's dying!" and she ran out of the room and screamed so loudly and violently that my sweet boy wagged his tail one time. We knew at that time he was still with us. I immediately, with no hesitation, picked him up in my pajamas and put him in the back of the SUV. I remember shaking and breathing as if I was shell shocked by a bomb. It took me about 10 minutes to get to the ER and Namac had crawled his way to the front and held my hand wanting to be touched. 

When I reached the ER, they acted very quickly and got him in the back. I was expecting them to come back and tell me he was dead. Luckily, I was told that he had been stabilized and was in cardiac tamponade. They had extracted 35 ml of non clotting blood from his pericardial sac. They suspected a tumor on the right side of his heart, kept him overnight to give him IVs and monitor him, and set me up to see a cardiologist for an echo. 

It was 5 days before he saw a cardiologist. For the first 2 days he was VERY weak and incontinent. I treated him with the utmost love and respect- 24/7 kisses, pictures, full body massages, the works. I felt like he was dying. I changed his diet to fresh cooked chicken, pork, veggies, eggs, parsley, kale, turmeric, cottage cheese, coconut oil, and sojos grain free mix. I rubbed him with lavendar and frankinsense oils to keep him calm. I treated him to raw turkey necks, turkey backs, grassfed lamb, t Bone steaks, and bully sticks. He got a can of fresh high quality sardines daily. I wanted to make sure he got the freshest food and cooked meals if this was his last rodeo. I cherished every moment and cried every day with severe anticipatory grief.

Finally it was echocardiogram and ultrasound day. As I entered the clinic, I remember feeling numb with a ton of adrenaline in order to be able to bear bad news and not break down in front of the doctor and other doggy parents there. After all, I am a 36 year old man that can only be brought to his knees by his sweet dog. After the echo was done the cardiologist came in with a smile on her face and told me that she not only saw no more accumulated fluid, but could not detect any tumors. She warned me that its more difficult to see tumors on the heart if there is not any fluid, so warned she could be wrong, but felt great after what she had seen. I remember asking her if it is most likely idiopathic and she said most likely. I then asked in disbelief, "sko I can take Namac into the mountains and go hiking again?" She smiled and said, "absolutely." 

Namac- feeding off of my energy, became like a puppy again. He has a companion husky brother that he has been with his whole life (I rescued them together). Everything was so amazing....I felt some relief. Because I am crazy obsessed with my boys, I installed a 6 camera system that has 2 way audio so I could continuously check on Namac and make sure he hadn't collapsed while I was at work. Every moment I had for 3 weeks, I would check on him and when he was asleep I would talk to him and see him respond. Every time I saw him moving was like hitting the lottery. As every day went by, I felt better and better. 

Three weeks of pure love and enjoyment went by. It was this past Monday and my wife called me. "Vafa, Namac's gums are a little pale. I am worried." I remember being in disbelief, yet chalking it up to my wife's inability to diagnose as well as I can. I was in denial. I rushed home. When I got to him, he had a lot of energy and was so happy to see me. I checked his gums, and although a bit pale, I pushed his gums and they turned white, then turned right back to a pale pink. I felt that he was OK, even though they were pinkish pale. Because I was worried, I made an appointment with an excellent holistic vet and took him straight for a consultation. 

On the way to the vet, Namac had his beautiful head out of the window the whole way soaking up the smells and sounds. I had a hard time concentrating on the road because I was so at peace just seeing how happy he was. I finally tilted my rear view mirror and would glance at him every now and then just to feel some euphoria. We made it to the holistic vet and I promptly ask the vet to check his gums. His response- "they look nice and pink to me." I asked him to check his heart beat with a stethoscope and he had an extremely difficult time hearing a heart beat and told me, "its probably because he is such a big dog." He really had no knowledge on treating an idiopathic pericardial effusion and told me that I should give him CoQ10 and beef heart. I left the vet's office feeling I had gained nothing and was EXTREMELY worried.

When we got home that night, I took Namac and his companion (Felly) for their nightly walk and dinner. He was very ginger and slow on that walk, but he made it through and ate very well. His gums were still that pinkish pale and when I pressed them in, they went white and recovered back to the pale pink. I was worried, yet tried to stay positive. I had a sleepless night. I stayed up until 3 am monitoring him and when I checked his gums they were slightly cold, yet pink. I finally fell asleep because he looked so peaceful and I wanted him to rest. 

That morning at 7 am I woke up to my wife, "Vafa! Namac's legs are wobbling!" I immediately jumped out of bed and the adrenaline and numbness came right back like a 10.0 earthquake. I went to the kitchen and he followed me in and I offered him a treat that he loves. He sniffed it, and layed back down. That was the first time in 9 years I had EVER seen him do that. The 10.0 earthquake feeling quickly was followed by a tsunami of pain, grief and sadness. I knew in that moment that my boy had something serious and it was back. He was not in cardiac tamponade, so I thought it MAYBE was a little fluid. He was still able to walk, all be it, very very slowly.

I took him back to the ER and got him squeezed in for an echocardiogram and ultrasound. I was shaking in the lobby and had already cancelled all my work appointments for the next couple of days expecting the bad news. The nurse technician....not even the Dr.....came in and I already knew from her serious "bad news" face. She told me he had a 1.5cm to 2.5 cm tumor on his heart and they were 99% sure it was hemangiosarcoma. She said he had fluid around his heart and tummy and they had extracted *360 ml*l of fluid! They told me he was stable and my options were 
surgery or chemo. I was told the surgery involved them breaking his ribs to gain entry to the heart and perform open heart surgery, while its beating, to remove the tumor. Then they suggested I could do chemo in conjunction and he may live 1-3 months if the surgery was a success. I asked if he could die on the operating table and they said it has happened a number of times. I thought to myself that him dying without me was NOT an option.

I was devastated and took him home after his procedure. His gums were nice and pink and he had a vigorous appetite that evening but was limping and very slow. I knew he was declining. He had diarrhea like water over the next 3 days. Being the selfish owner I am, I clung to hope and had him on yunnan baiyo and ordered a bottle of turkey tail mushroom in hopes of a miracle. 

On that 3rd day, I had come home with my wife at 5pm after an appointment and we didn't hear him barking and howling when we opened the garage. I knew he was alive though because of the camera. I had bought him some new chew toys and I opened the door and started squeaking his toy. He cried with joy and tried his damndest to jump up and grab it. He grabbed the toy and went to his bed and started guarding it. I kneeled down and checked his gums. They were ice cold and pale. His breath was cold as well. I looked at my wife and gave her a thumbs down and went numb. I knew this was it. I grabbed his leash and he happily came outside with Felly. I told my wife, "this is our last walk." He made it about 5 minutes to a grassy hill where he loved to relax. He stumbled and collapsed right in his favorite grassy spot and began to decline right in front of my eyes. I tried not to let him see my fear and just kissed him, massaged him and sang to him. Every time I thought he would take his last breath he would fight back and try to raise his head. I felt terrible for him and called my wife to grab the things and pick me up to take him to the ER. 

After loading him into the car with Felly, he seemed more relaxed and layed down and panted with a relaxed smile on his face. I called my family and they met me at the ER. When we reached the ER his gums had turned a bit pink again. I asked them to check to see if he had fluid. They came back 10 minutes later and told me that blood was collecting around his heart again. I had to make a terribly tough decision, but it involved my whole family. As we were discussing, Namac vomited his last 2 meals undigested. I think this was his way of telling me that he was done. I asked the Dr. to Euthanize him.

In a nice cozy and dim room, surrounded by family and our family dogs, Namac was layed to rest. He was upset when he saw the needle, but as I massaged him and sang to him he turned into putty in my arms. He trusted me so much. I didn't cry. I was brave for him so he wasn't frightened. Once relaxed, I gave the doctor the nod. She injected him and within 10 seconds he went lifeless in my arms. Once I knew he was gone, I continued to kiss him and cried violently. I saw my family get upset and I calmed down. I allowed Felly to inspect his body and I knew he knew what was going on. I know he needed to not wonder where Namac went if I didn't bring him.

Its almost 24 hours since this happened. My keyboard is soaked. I feel so empty, lost, and have no idea how I can ever get through this. Felly is depressed. He was the alpha. He was beautiful. He was loving. He was loyal.

I miss him. He was my rock. He was my baby. 

I'm glad those 3 weeks I thought it was idiopathic. It allowed me to give him relaxed love and have less grief.

He had an amazing life and I pray to God we are reunited again.

I hope this story did not upset anyone. 

Love and peace.

Vafa


----------



## Suki's Mom

You know when as a kid you'd stick your fingers in your ears so you wouldn't hear something? I want to do that with this tread. I am feeling sick to my stomach right now. Suki was at the vet for her wellness exam, and he found a tender spot in her abdomen. Then he found a lump on her spleen. Ultrasound is scheduled for tomorrow morning.


----------



## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

Suki's Mom I am so sorry. Sending my thoughts and prayers that Suki will be ok. Sending hugs to both of you. I


----------



## kelbonc

I'm so sorry for what you and Suki are going through. Sending prays and best wishes.


----------



## Traveler's Mom

I have to say something. To all the others that have experienced this horrible cancer I want you all to know my heart breaks for each and every one of you. We love our pups so much and feel we can never begin to repay all the love and joy they have given us. 

I can't continue reading this and similar threads. My silence on this thread is not because I don't care or don't want to show support or offer up what little I know about this. This subject is too close to my heart and getting closer every day. I know that sooner, rather than later, I'll be writing in with my own story. 

Like Suki's mom said, you want to just pretend you didn't hear the words. I want to pretend I'm not facing this to. 

Sending our prayers to those before us and to those that follow.


----------



## Suki's Mom

I just got to the office. The vet and the ultrasound technician did NOT see any sign of cancer . The radiologist will review the "film" (not sure if that is the correct word), and we should know by tomorrow at the latest. I am beyond relief!! Thank you for your good wishes.


----------



## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

Suki's Mom so happy to hear your news.


----------



## Lucina

In December I lost my Lucy at age 9 to an angiosarcoma of the heart. Basically the same disease just a different location. She was fine one day, and we took drone footage that day that show her running around as normal. The next day when I got home from work she was acutely ill. On arrival at the emergency vet she was in severe heart failure from the tumor. We put her down that night, after the ultrasound showed a pericardial effusion that when I saw it I couldn't believe she was even alive at all (I have a medical imaging background so I knew what I was looking at) There was no hope. She was gone. The vet told me when dogs present the way mine did that it was either an abdominal tumor or what my girl had. I couldn't have prevented it, and I couldn't have diagnosed it any earlier than I did. Even if I had there was no fixing it. The same thing with your dog. There was no fixing it, nothing you did caused it, and nothing you could have done would have prevented it. I'm so sorry for your loss.


----------



## Cascade

It's looking like Lola has Hermangiosarcoma. She has a lump on her neck, and mammary gland that both came back as blood filled tumors when I had them aspirated. She also has an enlarged spleen, is easily fatigued, has trouble breathing when exercising and was bleeding for almost two months when she came into heat. She is 7 and a half years old. The next steps are to get chest xrays and remove the lump on her neck for a biopsy but we feel with her other symptoms she is not healthy internally and is probably full of tumors :/


----------



## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

I am so sorry for your loss Lucina. I lost our Daisy in a similar fashion. It is so hard. I know she watches over you from where she is healthy and strong.


Cascade my thoughts and prayers are with you and your girl.


----------



## Cascade

Kilo has a tumor on his heart and was diagnosed as hermangiosarcoma. I wasn't given any treatment options, only to use a needle to drain some of the blood but was told that wouldn't make much of a difference basically. He doesn't have much time. He has declined so fast. His blood work, EKG all looked good, chest xrays just showed slightly enlarged heart. So it came as a shock to find out after the ultrasound that he can go anytime and that the end is so near. We had done an abdominal ultrasound/xrays back in Feb that came back clear so I stupidly thought we were clear of hermangiosarcoma. 

On the other hand, Lola is still with us and doesn't seem to have declined since last year. So I am guessing she doesn't really have hermangiosarcoma since she has lived this long without any change. She does have the blood filled tumors and exercise intolerance along with occasional coughing if she runs too hard. We didn't pursue further testing so don't really know now.


----------



## Elisabeth Ann Parent

My Stark (9yrs) was just recently diagnosed with the same. No treatment options, just keeping him comfortable and happy. 

I'm really sorry to hear of this foryour sweet pup.


----------



## Sarah johnson

My Byrdie (shephard mix) hasn't been feeling well this week and I thought she had eaten something or it was just the heat. She wasn't acting herself this morning and her stomach was swollen so took her to vet. She has a mass on her spleen that ruptured. They pulled blood out of her abdomen. He said there is too much blood to operate now so she goes in Monday morning possibly for surgery depending on blood work results. If it's cancer and it's spread he said surgery wouldn't be an option. His hope is she absorbs some of the blood this weekend. She just turned 9. He said if she goes down hill this weekend it will be quick and there isn't anything they can do. 
He said in the past he would do emergency surgery but most that have that much blood don't survive and the outcome would be better if we waited. We are home and she is pitiful and I am a mess. 
Any thoughts or support would be so appre


----------



## car2ner

Sarah johnson said:


> My Byrdie (shephard mix) hasn't been feeling well this week and I thought she had eaten something or it was just the heat. She wasn't acting herself this morning and her stomach was swollen so took her to vet. She has a mass on her spleen that ruptured. They pulled blood out of her abdomen. He said there is too much blood to operate now so she goes in Monday morning possibly for surgery depending on blood work results. If it's cancer and it's spread he said surgery wouldn't be an option. His hope is she absorbs some of the blood this weekend. She just turned 9. He said if she goes down hill this weekend it will be quick and there isn't anything they can do.
> He said in the past he would do emergency surgery but most that have that much blood don't survive and the outcome would be better if we waited. We are home and she is pitiful and I am a mess.
> Any thoughts or support would be so appre



this absolutely stinks. If she is going to pass away I hope she finds a comfortable sunny spot in the grass and simply goes to sleep quickly. It is easier on everyone than a long drawn out illness.


but better would be the miracle of her healing and you have a few more wonderful years together.


----------



## Nigel

Sorry to hear this Sarah. This cancer takes so many, I've lost two to this disease. This thread scares me as my girls turned 8 this year.


----------



## Aly

Like Nigel, I've lost two to this disease as well. Two years ago, I lost Gunner, a confirmed biter, guardian of the family (he woke me up to tell me that my mother was dying) and all around Great Dog. I went to bed the night before and he was fine. Woke up the next morning to find that he was dying. Took him to the vet immediately so that he could pass more peacefully. It's a horrible disease.

I miss my little warrior every day.

Vale Gunner.

Aly


----------



## Kimberly Baumgart

We lost our dog due to Hemangiosarcoma. He ha a spleen removed, and after 6 months he had all this metastasis all over his abdomen. We had to say goodbye at that point. Feel your pain. Once you feel ready, adopt another rescue. You sem like a wonderful person and pet parent!


----------



## DanielEHayes

JeanKBBMMMAAN said:


> I talked to a vet at Cornell about hemangiosarcomas - just to ask - can you generally predict/find them early. He said no.


I am going to disagree with that Vet, sorta. Of course you can. We just have not yet developed a cost effective and piratical way to do it. SO let's all cross our fingers for the future.

I lost my boy last week. HSA was probably ultimately the cause. His was in his heart. We made it 17 months post diagnosis. I suspect we had licked the cancer but the damage to the heart was already done. We did well and he had a good 17 months.

To the OP...my heart goes out to you and with this awful disease, whatever YOU did was the right thing. There are no right answers.


----------



## DanielEHayes

Klaus My Love said:


> Any thoughts or sources of information/stories would be most appreciated.


.

Klaus, my boy Bishop also was allegedly starved before the person who rescued him pounded a door and demanded him. He was about a year and a half old also when I came into his life.
My friend was doing some appliance work for the Sheriff of our Parish at one of his rental properties. The renter was a nurse that had rescued Bishop. My friend's daughter was with him and she played with the dog the whole time he was there. The nurse was going through a divorce and didn't feel financially capable of taking care of the dog and encouraged my friend to take it because he had a scare at his shop recently. The shop wasn't an ideal situation and I self appointed myself as his godfather. Eventually I took him home. The first day I left him home alone, Bishop pried open a 2nd story window that was cracked and apparently jumped out to come looking for me/us. We found him close by unharmed. WUT? Only one of the times in my 9 years with Bishop where I underestimated him and his desire to be with me.


This song has been talking to me for the last week.

Evanesence: Bring Me To Life


How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down, into my core
Where I've become so numb, without a soul
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there, and lead it, back, home

Wake me up inside
Wake me up inside
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run
Before I come undone
Save me from the nothing I've become

Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life

Wake me up inside
Wake me up inside
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run
Before I come undone
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life
Bring me to life

Frozen inside, without your touch
Without your love, darling
Only you are my life
Among the dead

I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
Got to open my eyes to everything
Don't let me die here
Bring, me, to, life

Wake me up inside
Wake me up inside
Call my name and save me from the dark
Bid my blood to run
Before I come undone
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life
Bring me to life
Bring me to life


----------



## Wisdi

Can I get some participation on some details to try and see if there is any pattern or way to decrease risk of our babies getting this horrible cancer

Was your GSD Spayed/Neutered if so at what age?
What food did you feed? 
How old were they when diagnosed?
How long did they live after diagnosis?
What age did they pass?

Any info would be very appreciated so we can all try and combat future cancers from happening to our fur babies <3


----------



## Magwart

@Wisdi, please start your own thread. This one is for support for people who've lost dogs. I don't want to see a thread full of grief turn into a spay/neuter/vaccine debate. People come to this thread who are heartbroken.


----------



## Wisdi

Magwart said:


> @Wisdi, please start your own thread. This one is for support for people who've lost dogs. I don't want to see a thread full of grief turn into a spay/neuter/vaccine debate. People come to this thread who are heartbroken.



That's the reason im posting here cause its about people that have lost family members and how to prevent it


----------



## Magwart

It's a sticky for GRIEF -- stickies are special places. We have many other threads already about hemangio causes/prevention. I've notified the mods to ask them to weigh in. Since you are new here, PLEASE research in our archives for the many discussions we've had in the past on causation, treatment, research, etc. I really don't think it needs to be rehashed for people who just recently lost a dog --they can get there when they're ready.


----------



## Fodder

@Wisdi i agree with @Magwart... please use the search feature or start your own thread in order to collect the information your after.

thanks!


----------



## Wisdi

Not only am I new to this forum, I've honestly never used forums in my life :O so be patient with me <3


----------



## axmode

Very tragically, quite unexpectedly and suddenly we lost our big, beautiful and beloved (spayed) girl named Livvie around d 5:38 PM on 12/31/2020; yes, the worst new year's eve event that I will have to live through for the rest of my life! I had come across this site before when researching GSD + HSA (Hemangiosarcoma, a term which I had never heard of before our tragedy), had found this thread and have since read through the many tragic stories of losses of these beautiful, wonderful and superb companions which we refer to as GSDs. I actually had written a much longer piece earlier on today which I went back, re-read and deleted because of its voluminous nature. This is my more "concise" version:

We acquired Livvie in Oct 2012 when she was just 14 weeks old, a bit older than most pups but she was one of the three remaining pups from the litter of six, She was also bespoke already but because the original family was going through a pregnancy, they had decided that a new GSD pup was not on the cards for them then; lucky, lucky us. It is very true that we do not adopt them but that they adopt us. We wanted a female and had chosen her sister based on the pics but the breeder told us that she would also bring Livvie because just like her mom (the dam) Livvie displayed the same caring, nurturing and sweet disposition. How right that lady was and when we all met, the beautiful gift named Livvie decided to adopt us and then the rest was history, by and large a very blessing and wonderful journey with our Livvie girl prior to her end:

She was only 8 1/2 at the time of her passing, not too young and not too old, not old enough to find much solace in her tragic demise. Those of us who have owned dogs in the past, know that by and large, most larger breeds settle into their senior years by the age of 8 and tend to get a bit slower, a bit more lazy, a bit more sleepy and bit calmer than the sorta hurricane which they can be say at the age of 2  Our Livvie had not displayed any signs to raise major red flags till the evening of 12/30 when on our extended evening walk, she heaved and purged the contents of her stomach 3 times within a 3 minute stretch! I checked her for wet & cold nose which seemed fine so we strolled back home. The evening, she was more lethargic and more thirsty which I chalked up to having vomited but upon trying to give her the doggie treats, she was not her usual greedy and voracious eater self! The next day on 12/31, I noticed that she just wanted to go and lay down more in the yard and wanted to drink excessively. It was on our morning walk about an hour later when I noticed that her belly looked really bloated as if she was pregnant (remember that she was spayed after we got her so she never did bear any pups). I was really alarmed and called the missus who contacted a friend whose sisters an out of state vet wh immediately suggested that we visit the nearest ER (new year's eve so the regular vet was already about to close). In the meantime, Livvie also managed to wet her bed which is something she had never done ever since she came to us as a pup. This really, really alarmed me because in 2016 I went through the same never-wetted-his-bed situation with my son's dog which I was looking after when the son was on an extended work related excursion (I ended up having to bear the tragedy of euthanizing that beautiful dog within a mere few days too... A big boned, neutered, large 10 YO black lab/border collie mix). In less than 24 hours I was noticing one red flag after other but I was thinking maybe GI or something to that effect in case Livvie had picked up and eaten something she shouldn't have!

Only an hour after filing the paperwork and dropping Livvie off (a much more difficult task during this Covid-19 pandemic to say the least), after we had visited the local Costco to buy Livvie a couple of new beds, we received that devastating call from the ER vet: Distended stomach because of Hemoabdomen with X-rays and then ultrasound showing black masses with all 4 quadrants in the belly (I have forgotten the medical term) filled with leaking blood, the spleen and the liver could not be clearly seen. The vet may as well had been speaking in Chinese-Mandarin to me, which I have no comprehension in! I heard the word cancer with imminent and impending death and the rest was just a blur to me. I was in shock and daze, like what and how? What is this likeliness of 75% Hemangiosarcoma? What is the ver saying? This dog was alert and she got in the car on her own accord, she went on walks and things, so WTH is the vet saying? Basically we were faced with 3 options:

- Medicate her and take her back home to be with, pet and feed her favorite food understanding the risks that she could pass on any minute or any hour with a day or so

- Emergency surgery just to make sure that it was not the benign Hemangioma tumor but because the X-rays and the ultrasound looked so dire, the vet did warn about humane euthanasia on the operating table

- Saying the extremely tough, gut wrenching and heart shattering goodbyes in the tent which the ER clinic had set up in the back parking lot (again due to Covid-19) which had a more serene and soothing look than the sterile vet cubicles/rooms which most, if not all pets seem to hate and detest.

The vet assured us that this case looked really bad and it was probably due to Livvie stoic breed and her otherwise great physical condition that she had not already collapsed on us in this interim period. For those who have had to make such impossible life/death decisions regarding your best friends and best companions, you do understand the pain which we were faced with in lieu of the presented facts. I will spare the minute by minute details but I can only take comfort in the facts that Livvie was clam, being petted by me and the missus while her head was resting in my arms, we professing our eternal love for her and thanking her for enriching our lives by so much during those 8 wonderful years for which I will eternally remain ever so grateful for. She then took her deep last breath and went to a peaceful sleep with head in my arms. RIP our beautiful Livvie girl: 7/07/2012 - 12/31/2020.

I have been going through heck and back in these past 3+ weeks with all the what/ifs. I, we, have had other dogs in the past like our wonderful golden retriever diagnosed with cancer at only 7, elected treatment and chemo just to see him wane, waste and suffer for mere 3 months before his eternal sleep, the son's dog which had spent so many weeks with me as if my own dog to be stricken down with some neurological condition culminating in a stroke and collapsing before I could get help to rush to the vet for euthanization, our 15 YO Yorkie which developed a multitude of ailments, arthritis, blindness, deafness prior to putting him to sleep; but, but, but, this one really, really, really crushed me and crushed us on many levels, first and foremost being that Livvie the GSD was our most beloved dog. It is hard to admit to having had favorites as they were all sweet and wonderful in their own ways, but Livvie was truly special and exceptional and after all said and done, I truly live with the feelings of guilt and blame as to whether I could have done better for her and by her. This happened so fast in such an awfully cruel manner that it has been hard for me to shake off the blame and the anger phases of my grief.

Thank you for reading.

Edited to add: Livvie as a full grown adult weighed around 85 lb. She was a full size female GSD born to a very large sire weighing around 110 and the dam around the same size. We ideally wanted her around 83 lb. but at times when we used to indulge her a bit more when younger, she weighed as high as 87. I was shocked to find out that fateful day she topped the scales at just over 92 lb. I have no medical or veterinarian background but I assume as a layman that this sudden increase in her weight as compared to when she was weighed 6 months ago, was probably because of a large splenic HSA tumor in addition to the internal bleeding, but I am not so sure about this explanation.


----------



## gtaroger

I am sorry for your lose. I just went through a very painful lose of my service dog. He had lupus.It's been a couple weeks and it still feel terrible. I guess it's one day at a time. I try to think of the sweet things he did.That seems to help a little.


----------

