# Frustrating neighbors!



## Shaolin (Jun 16, 2012)

Ugh! I just had to get this off my chest. Yesterday, I was outside with Finn. My front yard isn't fenced and Finn knows he's not allowed to step foot into the street without me, but for whatever reason, I tethered him on a 50ft lead.

Good thing I did.

I noticed that there were kids riding up and down the street on scooters and bikes, but Finn was happily chewing on a knuckle bone and I was reading a book on the porch. Next thing I know, I hear whistling. I look up and there are kids whistling and calling for Finn. His ears are up and he's paying attention, but he hasn't moved yet. I wave to the kids and they stop and run away.

They come back about ten minutes later and start it all over again. None of the kids can be older than ten. They then run across the street and up to Finn to pet him. I jump up and tell the kids to leave him alone in a very stern voice. I then explain that they should never run up to a strange dog without an adult. Finn has gone from a down to a sit, but isn't interracting with the kids. The kids run away and I settle back down to read, but I pull Finn on the porch next to me.

Not even five minutes later, I get an angry parent yelling at me for yelling at her kids. She said if I have a vicious dog, I should keep him indoors away from the public. I told her that her kids did not ask my permission to walk into my yard and pet my dog and if they did, I still wouldn't have let them without her being there. She told me that no one else in the neighborhood has any problems with her kids petting their dogs and once again I reminded her that, I had no issue with it, if they would've asked first and if they had a parent with them.

Her final insult was her telling me that "my kind" have attack dogs for one reason. I kindly told her that my dog isn't an attack dog and that our conversation was done if she was going to start insulting me. She walked away calling me a [email protected]#^& as she left.

The only upside to all of this was this morning. It's cool out, so we've been leaving our windows open. She was outside at the bus stop telling all the other parents how there's a vicious white dog that they should all be careful of and my next door neighbor laughed at her, saying, "That dog is better behaved than your own kids! I've never seen a sweeter dog in my entire life and my kids love him!"

Mind you, that was the same parent who hated Finn at the beginning, but now asks all the time if her kids are allowed to play with him when we're outside. They even bought him a big rawhide bone for Christmas last year!

Anyone else have trouble with their neighbors?


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## porcelanne (Sep 13, 2012)

Hahahaha that taught her!! Ace to hear you have a white gsd too  I think they're something special... but then I guess I'm biased 

I have trouble with my neighbours, or more so my neighbour's dogs! Across the road they have two whippet collie cross things and they're vicious and totally untrained. If they get out into the yard they'll bark nonstop at anyone who walks past in the street, or if my dog's in our yard. Delivery men and postmen won't even come onto their land. The dogs bite at people through the fence and if they get out they'll chase sheep and horses. Most annoying thing though is the noise they make. You can hear them further up the village. I hate how their owners just let their dogs be like that and don't train them, the dogs are 4! I am worried their barking will rub off on my dog. He better not ever think it's acceptable behaviour!


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## Rerun (Feb 27, 2006)

No, we keep it friendly around here. My theory is we are going to be here awhile so no sense making bad neighbors. 

As it's been said for I'm sure hundreds of years, good fences make good neighbors. Sometimes the fence is more important to keep people/animals out than to keep yours in.

Before I had kids, I would've probably yelled at them to. Now that I have them, I tend to just not stress about this stuff. If you know the dog is friendly, use the time to educate them, not scold them and tell them they can't pet the dog. I would've let them pet the dog as much as they wanted while I sat there and talked to them about asking first, how not all dogs are friendly, etc. 

At the end of the day, you can think you are "right" but when the neighbors don't like you no one really wins IMHO. I like keeping it friendly with the neighbors and that means not scolding their kids for wanting to pet your dog. Good job having a well trained and behaved dog, now enjoy that training and good behavior and let the little ones pet him. JMHO


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## jaggirl47 (Jul 18, 2009)

I have issues with mine. Leyna can be dog aggressive. We are working with a trainer on this issue and she is slowly getting better. My new neighbors moved in 9-10 months ago and they have 3 dogs. I let them know up front the issue Leyna has and to make sure she keeps her dogs on a leash. She brings them out constantly in the front with no leash and they love to run into my yard. I was worried Leyna may hurt one which is why I warned her.

Well, she ended up trading one of her little dogs for a big dog. This dog does not like Leyna and Leyna does not like this dog back. The neighbor's dog likes to lunge into my fence barking at Leyna, which causes Leyna to lunge and bark back. We correct Leyna immediately and bring her into the house until their dog is put away.

Well, another neighbor called me and informed me that my neighbor wants to call animal control and report my dog as a dangerous animal. I was livid! We do all we can to insure both Leyna's and others safety. Due to her continuing to let her dogs out front, I have made it a point to muzzle Leyna when we go out front. The only time I take Leyna out front now is to go somewhere, front door to car. I can't even walk her through the neighborhood because of this person.

The neighbor also likes to stand on something to see over the fence and teases Leyna and eggs her on.

Well, the other day I was out front, my husband let Leyna out. The neighbor's dog started barking and jumping on the fence, causing Leyna to do the same. I immediately corrected Leyna from the front yard and she stopped and went to the other end of the yard, away from the neighbors dog. My neighbor snapped at me saying, " Your dog is going to kill my dog if she keeps lunging at the fence". I finally had enough and told her if she didn't like my dog walking up to my fence in my backyard, she can build her own "dang" fence because I don't appreciate her dog causes damage to my fence.

My neighbor has not said anything since.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

I guess I would have reacted a little differently. I would have explained to the kids that calling a dog out to the street is not okay because it could put the dog in danger and explained about running up to strange dogs. And I would have taken 5 minutes to let the kids pet him.

Not to defend the parent...she was completely out of line and the things she said are inexcusable.


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## Caledon (Nov 10, 2008)

Kids. I can just hear the story their told their mom now.

Not dog related, but my sister has 2 boys living next to her that are lucky enough to have dad build them an ice rink every year. She has retrieved maybe 50 pucks from her back yard over the winter months and just tosses them back over the fence. One day a puck hit their side window and her husband yelled at the kids to be careful where they hit the puck. That turned into world war III. How dare he yell at their kids! Now if that were my kid that hit the window I'd be marching them over to the neightbours to say sorry.

Sometimes the best defence is a strong offence. That's what's happened with your neighbourhood kids. If you need to defend, attack instead.


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## Jag (Jul 27, 2012)

I would have reacted the same way. I have a neighborhood full of kids, and most of them NOT well behaved. Without an adult there, no way would I allow it. When we first bought our house, we had some super clueless people next door and they had 3 little kids. They came into my *fenced* back yard, walked in my front door... it was a total nightmare! I'd never seen or expected this kind of behavior...especially since their kids were afraid of my dogs! With our dog laws the way they are here, I would NOT allow any kid to touch my dogs without a parent around. They should also have been taught not to tease dogs or walk onto someone's property without permission. What is wrong with people??

Oh, and when they moved, they told the new people that my dogs were 'dangerous'. Now this was true of my female, but NOT my male! The guy that lives there now is a cop, and he met my male several times, as did his wife. Although he could be obnoxious, he'd NEVER be aggressive for no reason! I was glad that my new neighbor told me about the 'warning' he'd received after he met my licking male! I have no idea why he'd even say this, since NEITHER of my dogs ever hurt their kids, even when they walked into my back yard when they were out...or even when they walked into my house! My dogs knew the difference between a child and an adult.


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## Olivers mama (Oct 13, 2010)

Shao - guess I'm more like you. I don't let the neighborhood kids pet Ziva either - UNLESS I'm right there & have a firm hold. Ziva's a sweet dog, but I've seen kids start out petting & then twist the fur. And, if the dog snaps cause it hurts, YOU are the one to be sued.

In the "old days", we could pet any dog around. None of us would've thought about hurting / scaring the dog. And none of our parents would've thought about suing. But it's a whole different world out there today. IMO, I'd rather be safe than sorry.

Sorry your neighbor is such a turd. But I'm glad your other neighbor defended you. In Utopia, all neighbors are sweet & understanding. And, while it'd be nice to live in Utopia, we don't. I'd consider a short fence to keep the kids out unless they're invited. As good as (most) of the kids in our neighborhood are, no one asks permission any more. And, even when told "No", many kids will do it anyway.


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## codmaster (Aug 5, 2009)

Video cameras can also be a really nice thing to have.


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## apenn0006 (Jun 22, 2012)

That reminds me of the little hellions across the street from me who were whistling for Yager when we were in the front yard earlier this Summer. When I looked up they ran behind their house. As soon as I got back to work weeding the flower bed they'd start whistling for the dog again. I have also heard them calling to him "here doggy"...It absolutely makes my blood boil. My 4 year old was in the yard with me and even she got annoyed that they were calling for him.


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## BowWowMeow (May 7, 2007)

I agree that it's not smart to run up to a dog that you don't know but I would rather use an opportunity like that for education. I would have stopped the kids from calling and running up to my dog and explained why this wasn't a good idea...in a friendly way. Then I would have let them pet him so that it was a positive experience for everyone. 

I would be very careful about the strength of your negative emotions in these types of situations. Dogs are very good at picking up on emotions and what you don't want is your dog associating children with a negative emotion in you. 

I can't tell you how many times toddlers have come from nowhere and rushed in to wrap their arms around Rafi's neck. Rafi has a great temperament and is perfect in these situations but I do always give the parents a gentle heads up on how dangerous it is for their child to do that...and how dangerous it is for a dog to be put into that type of situation.


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## kiya (May 3, 2010)

Over the years I have learned to "try" to control myself, as hard as it might be. I am sure the kids twisted everything making you sound like a raving lunitic. Sometimes as hard as it might be you have to use that sarcastic tone and come up with something whitty enough to stop the kids and make them think. I always worry about some sort of retaliation so I sometimes just bite my tongue. 
I would definately be looking into a fence.


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## Gretchen (Jan 20, 2011)

We have trouble with our neighbors, but it has nothing to do with our dog. They all live too large and have put too much priority on their cars, and are noisy.

We hardly have any kids in our neighborhood, almost wish we did so Molly could have adjusted to them. Because she was not exposed to kids, we don't let them pet her. When I was growing up, it was common for all the parents on the street to correct any of the kids in the moment, it was welcome. 

Many years ago, there was a boy bully on our street who pushed our daughter. My husband thought it would be better to have a one on one talk with the boy, rather than tell on him to his mother (that's the way he was raised). WRONG! Next thing we knew the police were at our door. So in the future, it seems like you may need to call the police for "trespassing" if the kids come onto your lawn. Sorry you live around such a turd.


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## Rerun (Feb 27, 2006)

Really, calling the police because your neighbors kid dares to walk onto your lawn to pet your dog? Wow, no wonder so many of you have terrible relationships with your neighbors! That's ridiculous.

I am so glad I was raised in good neighbor relations. No ones neighborhood is perfect, but if you just use a little common sense and be polite to your neighbor it sure does make life more pleasant. We get along with ALL our neighbors, and they with us. No one is perfect, but no need to be rude to eachother.


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## Zeeva (Aug 10, 2010)

I've had kids tease Zeeva on walks before. I've always grown up with parents who were slightly afraid of dogs so I was taught never to tease dogs. IMO kids these days don't always respect dogs because they don't understand the etiquette involved in approaching dogs (especially kids who've never owned a dog). 

I agree with Jax. I would've tried to explain to kids not to tease strange dogs. It's an important lesson they need to learn both for the safety of the dog as well as themselves. Not every dog has good manners but just about every kid expects good manners because of the way dogs are portrayed on TV etc...

JMO. I put a disclaimer on this in case anyone is offended by it; it was not my intention


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## Nikitta (Nov 10, 2011)

I'm lucky. The only neighbor next to me loves my dogs. No kids. The only child that really annoyed me and bothered my dogs was autistic. He would throw rocks at them when they were in the outdoor kennels. But that was the fault of the mother who would just shove him out the door and let him terrorize the neighborhood. But that bit her in the tush eventually. As he got bigger, he got violent and started beating on her. She had to send him to an institution.


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## GSDolch (May 15, 2006)

Rerun said:


> Really, calling the police because your neighbors kid dares to walk onto your lawn to pet your dog? Wow, no wonder so many of you have terrible relationships with your neighbors! That's ridiculous.



As much as I would like to agree with this, if you know that the parent isn't going to do anything, if you know that if you try to say something to the kid that is posing problems the parents will call the cops on you, then calling the cops when the kid comes onto your property after you've told them not to might be the only course of actions.

Depending on the age of the kid, it might be the only thing that teaches them they can't act certain ways and not expect something to happen. It might also knock some sense into the parents to actual parent their kid.

It sucks, but that's the way it is in some places. It's not always as simple as a kid just walking in your yard, not if its a kid that has a history of causing trouble.


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## GSDolch (May 15, 2006)

I only like one of my neighbors, and another one so far are to new for me to make a judgement, but so far so good. Their kids have been really nice and haven't caused any issues.

The people before them, I couldn't stand, and yes, I called the cops on the two teens that were there. My son was outside, he is 11, the little boy that lives there is about five years younger, and he was trying to fight with my son. This kid was ALWAYS causing trouble, his mom didn't care either. Anyways, my son wouldn't fight him and kept dodging him and moving every time the little boy would try to rush him. Finally he stood his ground and, well, the little boy ended up falling to the ground. After that, the two teens that were there started to yell and cuss at my son, saying that if he "did that again they would smack him".

Yes, I called the police and told them (while the police officer was there) that if they talked to my son again I would press charges. Bluff, maybe, but it got the point across and I never heard anything out of them sense. At least something to through to them, because their parents sure didn't care.


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## Kayos and Havoc (Oct 17, 2002)

I have only had a few kids run up to my dogs over the years. Most of them do ask before they approach. The question is usually "does your dog bite" or "is your dog mean". I try to explain that any dog can bite and sometimes dogs are unsure of kids too and may not want to be petted so they should always ask first. 

There is one little boy in the neighborhood that just loves Havoc. Havoc is not the most kid freindly dog I have had, he had a few negative encounters with neighbor kids harassing him over the fnece when he was a puppy when we lived in Oregon. (I had run inside for a quicky potty bbreak and left him out with Max and Kayos, came back and the kids were standing on a trampoline and leaning over the six foot privacy fence throwing stones over the fence at him. Parents were called and kids reprimanded but damage was done.) Anyway.... Havoc likes this boy too and he always stops to visit with us.

Our neighbors here in Oklahoma are okay. The family on one side has 4 dogs that are barkers but Kayos fence fights with them too. We do work together to bring dogs in when this happens. They are afraid of my dogs even tho my dogs have never threatened them but they have never made any issue over this. 

Neighbors on the other side have no dogs and I know the barking bothers them which is why we act to get our dogs in when they bark over much. 

We make a point when we move to meet our neighbors and give them a cell phone number to call us if the dogs disturb them. Since we work all day our dogs have an indoor/outdoor run so they can bark and make noise.

Good fences make good neighbors too.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

I am all for keeping nice with neighbors, but, no way would I reward children for doing something wrong and dangerous. I don't consider letting children touch my dogs if they do not ask first. And then I assess everything, which dog I have with me, how many kids, do they seem calm with a level of self control, can they follow simple instructions?

I would have told the children not to call or approach a dog they don't know, and I would not have let them pet my dog. 

I probably would have had a thing or two to say to the mother that complained, but I might just rack her up as a hopeless cause. I might even have told her that my dog has not been raised around children and I want to prevent a possible injury from occurring. 

But, I also would probably hang out in the fenced back yard with my dog, and in the front yard, I would go without the dog. If you know kids are out there whose parents are going to let them get away with murder, it is usually best to keep your four footed friends out of Harm's way. 

Out of sight, out of mind. In another 3-4 years, these kids might be shooting your dog with bee bees, paint balls, or worse, if parenting has anything to do with stuff like that.


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## SueDoNimm (Jul 3, 2012)

Ugh. I can't believe she told you to keep your dog indoors away from the public! A dog secured in your yard, with you supervising it, is public? How can anyone say something like that with a straight face? You should have told her that she needs to keep her kids indoors and away from the public, since they were trespassing on your property and trying to endanger your dog by luring it across a street.

I've very lucky to have lots of dog-loving neighbors and not many bratty kids (other than my own ) around.


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## x0emiroxy0x (Nov 29, 2010)

Not all neighbors are perfect. We grew up in a cul-de-sac with five other families and we all loved eachother and got along.

All the parents scolded eachother's children and put eachother's children in time-out. 

We are in the South where you are *supposed* to respect your neighbors, and luckily all five of the families in our little area not only respected eachother, but loved eachother. We had cul-de-sac parties once a month and the parents all played Bunco together once a week.

When one of our neighbors got a dog they did not train it and it kept running in our backyard and chasing our cats up trees and scaring them. My mom went over there and told them she was upset because the cats were hiding all the time and my neighbor took the dog to training classes.

Now, if only all neighbors treated eachother like this.

If someone's bratty little kids ignored me and ran onto MY property and antagonized my dog multiple times I would have no reason calling the cops. Why should I have to put up with someone else that can't watch/discipline/teach their kids? So I should have to put up with them doing that to *be a good neighbor*? I would rather not be friends with the neighbor then let kids act like idiots and ignore my requests. As a child I NEVER would have gone against an adults request....my parents would have whipped me with a belt.


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## Olivers mama (Oct 13, 2010)

x0emiroxy0x;2580631....my parents would have whipped me with a belt.[/QUOTE said:


> I LMAO when I read this - your parents must've been related to mine! Altho, I will say 2 things about spankings I got: 1) I can count on 1 hand the total number & 2) I've never been in trouble with the law or got out of hand. I had no fear of cops (my dad was 1) - our house always had cops in it. I had "Fear of Father". And it worked for me - even thanked him years later.
> 
> I don't want to take away from the OP or turn this into something else, but 'Time-outs' don't always work. When 1 little snot kept shooting BB's at my car in my driveway, I marched over & spoke with his mom - told her he needed a smack. She was aghast. I was fuming. My car had pelt-marks on it. (It's only a 2002 camaro - but it's MINE!) The little snot kept it up - so a friend of mine on the local PD had a chat with him. And the mother - if it would've continued, would've had to pick her kid up from juvey.
> 
> Seems there's always 1. He hasn't done this in awhile & he better not EVEN shoot my dog with those *&^%$ BB's!


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## Shaolin (Jun 16, 2012)

Most of our neighbors aren't too bad. They keep to themselves. If we're out and about, we get weird looks and it's not uncommon for people to walk to the other side of the street or give him a wide berth without him even. We have a few neighbors who stop by on a regular basis to sit and chat and see Finn, but other than that, we do our thing, they do theirs.

I like to have the ability to sit on my front porch with the dog. It's stupid that I have ignorant people who make it hard to do so. I think from now on, I won't let him out in the yard itself, but we have a baby gate to close off the porch, so we can all sit there. 

Update: So, hubby was unloading things from the car and I was outside with him watering our plants. Some guy walks up to us and introduces himself as crazy lady's husband. He saw Finn watching from the front windows and he apologized. He said his kids have never had a dog, but no one else has complained about them petting their dogs. He said he had a very long talk with them about the dangers of just randomly running up to dogs and trying to play with them without him or his wife being around and without the permission of the owner.

I offered him the chance to bring his kids over and they could meet with him properly if he would like and he agreed. He started to walk away, then he asked if he could meet him first, "just to make sure he's not mean." I was fine with it; he's a parent and he's supposed to be making sure everything is safe. The two met and it went very well. He brought his kids over about ten minutes later and we all talked about how to properly meet dogs and how to act around them. They were much better today than they were yesterday and I was thrilled! They apologized profusely for what they did and all was well.

I wasn't suprised that the wife didn't come over and I wasn't upset about it. I'm glad I got a chance to educate versus have it turn into a very bad situation down the road.

By all means, I love hearing stories about how people grew up. My mother told me a story about when I was 5 or 6 and I just randomly ran up to a dog to pet it. She told me I was lucky I didn't get my face eaten off. I've always had a very healthy respect for all animals. I just wish others would do the same. 

And yes, I grew up with the village-raising-the-child philosophy.


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## JakodaCD OA (May 14, 2000)

glad it turned out well, the wife was probably home spitting nails that her husband and the kids came to meet the MEAN BIG OLE German Shepherd!)))))


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## Shaolin (Jun 16, 2012)

I guess. The kids loved every minute of it. I let them feed Finn a few training treats and they thought it was the coolest thing in the world. I enjoyed being able to teach a bunch of kids about how to properly meet and greet a dog. I think my favorite question was if they could ride him! Well, that and if they could take him to school for show and tell.

It was also good for Finn. Every day is a training day, every experience is something to learn from, so I think today was the very first time he had more than myself and one other person touching him at once and he did so well! I was so very proud of him today.


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