# Hemangiosarcoma took my boy too soon



## dakotachloe

I'm new here but have lurked for the last month because Duncan, my 9 year old GSD, got a diagnosis of hemangiosarcoma. Now I'm trying to deal with his death a week ago last night and I'm not doing it very well. 
Here's Duncan's story:It started the week before Halloween, he just got up off the floor and hung his head and stared off into space and then went to his water dish. We noticed the odd behavior and talked to the vet about it... couldn't find anything. The next day I collected a urine sample that was like Coca-Cola. We got him on antibiotics and he was fine! We thought that was it. Then it happened again, the day before Thanksgiving. Rushed him in to the vet and yup, the urinary track infection was back. He rallied, but then would have these stumbling episodes, and the head hanging, staring out into space. I knew something was wrong. We saw an internist on November 30th, had full blood work which was suspicious of hemangiosarcoma. Took xrays but didn't see anything or feel anything in his belly. They wanted to do a splenectomy and then chemo after and we were all for helping him any way we could. He had surgery December 1st and did well for 5 days, then had random episodes of the same symptoms of head hanging, lots of water drinking.... we knew we were in palliative care at that point, but I didn't think this awful disease would take my precious boy just 19 days after surgery.
Our barometer for stopping his suffering ourselves was his appetite. He was eating well, even had part of my chicken breast 3 hours before he died.
He died at home on December 19th at 9:30 pm, in my and my husband's arms, we talked to him and comforted him as best we could until he was gone. It was a very traumatic experience and I cannot stop crying.... I need to take sleeping pills to even get through the night time. I was with Duncan from the time his surgery was over until he died. I slept where he slept, I held him and talked to him. I feel like my heart is broken in half. 
I have an american eskimo dog and a cat still at home and I know I'm scaring them away because I'm being so needy and wanting them to comfort me.
How does someone get through this? I am devastated, and there are just no words to describe how empty and sad I feel. I have an appointment with my therapist next week, but I just wanted to tell Duncan's story here because I know there are many who understand this feeling and I just need some support.:help:


----------



## DanielleOttoMom

I'm so sorry for your loss of your beautiful boy Duncan. Thank you for sharing your story. Sending hugs from Dallas and lots of prayers.


----------



## Scarlettsmom

I am so sorry about your loss. We lost our GSD/Husky mix to the same disease at Christmas 2008. It was heartbreaking. 

I know many on this board have lost our beloved dogs to the same illness. I wish there was more we could do to comfort you. For us, bringing a new dog into our lives helped us heal, but we still miss Paige everyday. We probably always will. She is waiting for us, as is your Duncan, on the other side of the rainbow bridge.


----------



## RebelGSD

I am so sorry for your loss, I lost two of mine to this terrible disease. You can read my post on my BoBo in this section, a few posts below yours. We went through surgery and chemo. It is hard but you are not alone.


----------



## kiya

I'm so very sorry for your loss. 
We lost our first GSD, Cheyenne, almost 10 years ago to the same, he was 9. I still miss him.


----------



## dakotachloe

Thank you everyone for your replies. I'm sorry for your losses as well. I will miss Duncan until the day I see him again.


----------



## KSdogowner

I am so sorry for your loss. It is tragic to lose our loved ones to this disease.


----------



## Remo

I have lost two beautiful GSDs to this dreaded condition. I all too well know exactly what you are going through. It has been 1 1/2 years since I lost the love of my life, Remo, and I still cry for him every single day. If you need to talk, I have a very sympathetic ear. Shoot me a PM and I will give you a call. This particular horror has a special heartache of its own since it usually involves a dog that we thought was healthy and takes them so quickly. Cry your guts out. And then cry some more. Please know that you are in my heart and thoughts.


----------



## obxterra

So sorry for your lose. Hemangiosarcoma is so insidious and heartbreaking. We lost Jaz to that in September. It was so sudden and fast I was at first convinced she had been poisoned. 

Cherish the time you had with Duncan and rest assured that you did what you could and you were there for him through to the end.


----------



## GSDBESTK9

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too lost my 7 year old boy a few months back. Way too young.  It broke my heart.


----------



## Stosh

Such a cruel swift disease that has taken so many way too soon. Duncan was obviously well loved and will be sorely missed.


----------



## n2gsds

:halogsd:I am so sorry for your loss! Yes, it is a terrible disease but take comfort in the fact that you did all that you could for him and were there with him until the end! I lost my Carleigh Dec. 9, 2010 to hemangiosarcoma. I still cry almost daily. May you find peace in your beautiful memories of him!


----------



## katieliz

oh no another member of the club that nobody wants to belong to. after a lifetime of these dogs i had my first experience with hemangio with my wonderful rescue boy from this board, the shepster. i am so very, very sorry for your great loss. they are all so incredibly special. perhaps when the time is right you can open your heart and your home to another one. RIP beautiful boy Duncan.

take good care, many blessings.


----------



## chelle

I am so very sorry. How heartbreaking. Go give that sweet Eskie an extra kiss. My deepest condolences.


----------



## dakotachloe

I am so grateful for all of the support from everyone on this board. It's a club no one wants to belong to, but commiseration is comforting if we have to have this in common. I never knew about this horrible disease until almost a month ago. I hate how I had to watch this beautiful creature slowly lose the brightness in his eyes. I thought we would have more than 19 days after the splenectomy. So did our doctors, as they didn't see any metastasis during the surgery.
We are blessed with friends and family that know our dogs are our fur kids (we don't have children) and so acknowledge and appreciate that we'd do anything for them and the loss we are feeling is so profound. We got lots of cards of condolences and so we decided to make sort of photo thank you cards online expressing our thanks. I did that tonight and at first going through photos put a smile on my face, seeing puppy pictures and other pictures of shenanigans. The finished card just made me sob. I miss him so much and I don't WANT to live without him. I want him back!!!! Ugh, this is so much harder than I'd ever imagined.
I'm trying to love up my other pets and appreciate each day of life in general because it can be gone in an instant. I have no regrets and I know that Duncan felt loved and I'm glad he died at home in our arms. I'm just so sad that it had to happen at all. I'm so very sad.... had to go in the bathroom at work and cry today. The emotions bubble up at unfortunate times. Luckily my coworkers understand. 
Again, thank you for the kind words. It truly does help because you all know how amazing these dogs are. I'm sorry we all have to be in this horrible club.


----------



## dakotachloe

Duncan, I loved you from the moment I first saw you to the moment your heart beat its last and will continue loving you and missing you until we meet again.


----------



## chelle

dakotachloe said:


> Duncan, I loved you from the moment I first saw you to the moment your heart beat its last and will continue loving you and missing you until we meet again.


And you WILL meet again! Duncan was a beautiful, *beautiful* boy!!!!!!! 

The pic with him and the Eskie,,, :wub::wub::wub:

I'm so glad you have the support of coworkers and family... but I'm sure the pain is still so intense. I dread the day. Dread, dread, dread. I'm really sorry you're going thru this. You will see your boy again. You will. No doubt whatsoever about that.


----------



## katieliz

shep was diagnosed just before memorial day, and let me know it was time to go on june 9th. it was shocking how quickly everything progressed. that was in 2010 and i still stroke his picture and cry.


----------



## GSDLoverII

I lost my Casey Oct 20, 2011 to hemangiosarcoma and now I am losing my other girl Gypsy who was diagnosed with cancer a week ago. She is going down hill fast and we will probably have to put her down by Fri.
She is suffering and is on pain meds. 
In hind sight, it is better the way Casey went. A lot less suffering.
I am sorry for your dog and for you. German Shepherds have a lot of health problems.
I am still mourning Casey and feel completely devastated with having to put Gypsy down.


----------



## GSDLoverII

GYPSY has Colorectal adenocarcinoma.
I feel like I am dying inside.
I love my dogs more than life.


----------



## Cassidy's Mom

OMG, I am SO sorry! That just totally sucks.


----------



## dakotachloe

Oh I'm so sorry for you having to lose two dogs in such a short time, losing one is beyond devastating. I am so, so sorry.  We had almost 3 weeks to "cope" with impending loss, but to have one week or just have them collapse from a bleed with no signs of disease? Wow. Please know you are in my thoughts, and Gypsy is in my thoughts and I hope Duncan found Casey to play with at the bridge.


----------



## dakotachloe

I'm just going to use my thread here to get my feelings out... I hope this pain and feeling of just emptiness starts to ease. I know I'll miss Duncan for the rest of my life, but just last night, I went grocery shopping and cried all the way home, like sobbed, cried like I was a child. Life is going on and Duncan's not with us like he should be and it's not fair. I want him back!! I miss his sweet face, how hilarious he was, how he felt against my leg in bed with us when I fell asleep... I miss everything about him. I have my other dog and my cat and I'm trying to lavish attention on them like crazy to ease their pain and mine, but love for each dog is different, just like people. I just plain old miss Duncan. I'm so sad.... I'm also at work, so before I get to sobbing and making my cubicle mates severely uncomfortable, I'll leave it at that. I'm sure everyone understands this feeling.... Thanks for listening.


----------



## Remo

For me, time helps, but I still cry every single day. At least now it is usually just a few tears, a pain in my heart and some anger for having lost him at such a young age. For the longest time it was full out sobbing, can't catch your breath, feels like an elephant is sitting on your chest, multiple times a day. That still happens, but not as often as it used to. For the first couple of months I would curl up in Remo's dog bed and just cry for ridiculous amounts of time. I still do this once in a while too. It is very weird, but it seems comforting to me. 

It is amazing the grip that these dogs have on our hearts and souls. Be extra good to yourself.


----------



## dakotachloe

It's been 3 weeks today since Duncan moved on. I still cry every day, just not ALL day. It's so random, like yesterday I was putting clothes away and just BAM - it hit me. It'll be a sound or glancing at a picture, or just nothing at all. My heart is still heavy with grief and I miss him so much. I still do have Chloe our Eskie and our cat that provide so much love and friendship and joy and I try to give them as much affection as they let me. I think Chloe is just starting to come out of her grief period, as she'd been acting aloof and just "off". A few moments after Duncan passed, she came and laid next to him on her back so they were head to head and she barked and then got up and ran upstairs. I think she was saying "get up, please!". These precious souls come into our lives and it's so hard to let them go. Oh how I miss and love you Duncan. Forever.


----------



## Josie/Zeus

I know exactly how you feel. My Zeus died from this horrible cancer as well, the only good thing that came out of this was he gave us another 4 months to prepare ourselves. My husband and I often talk about Zeus, how great he was. 

Only time can ease the pain. Zeus died the day before his 9th birthday. 

You are in my thoughts.


----------



## JazzyLuv

I also know how you feel, we lost our Jazzy to this awful disease just 4 days ago...I would sell my soul to have our beautiful girl back, but I suppose God needed her more than us...We just got to "rent" her for a little while, and it was the happiest 6 years of our lives...My heart goes out to you and the other wonderful people on here who understand what we are all going through...


----------



## sheps4life

Tears from me to you

:gsdhead::angel:RIP HANA 2003-12/30/2011


----------



## codmaster

dakotachloe said:


> I'm just going to use my thread here to get my feelings out... I hope this pain and feeling of just emptiness starts to ease. I know I'll miss Duncan for the rest of my life, but just last night, I went grocery shopping and cried all the way home, like sobbed, cried like I was a child. Life is going on and Duncan's not with us like he should be and it's not fair. I want him back!! I miss his sweet face, how hilarious he was, how he felt against my leg in bed with us when I fell asleep... I miss everything about him. I have my other dog and my cat and I'm trying to lavish attention on them like crazy to ease their pain and mine, but love for each dog is different, just like people. I just plain old miss Duncan. I'm so sad.... I'm also at work, so before I get to sobbing and making my cubicle mates severely uncomfortable, I'll leave it at that. I'm sure everyone understands this feeling.... Thanks for listening.


 
Keep talking about your boy! It really does help!


----------



## selzer

I am so sorry for your loss. My Arwen was also nine. She had no symptoms really. That morning, she did not eat all of her food, but she went running and playing in the field like my puppy. When I came home from the shepherd meeting, she did not greet me at the gate of her kennel. I went in and she was lying on her cot, dead. I wailed into to the night. Arwen was my heart-dog, my special, special girl. And losing her was like losing a part of myself. I certainly understand the feeling of being broken in half. All I can say is that your grief is normal. I think it is a testament to how special the bond was between you and your dog. 

It has been two years this month since Arwen passed away. I don't know that there are that many days that go by that I do not think about her for one reason or another. Today my contractor mentioned her, said she did not like him. I would have chewed his head off if he said anything negative about her. It is not a raw gaping wound now though. 

It is the one thing about our dogs that is unbearable, that they only live so long. I am really sorry.


----------



## Debbieg

I am sorry too. My Eli died of this horrible cancer on May 31 , 2009 6 weeks before his 9th birthday. 

I got up early that day, let him out into the back yard and went to church. When I came home my family told me they had found him by the tree and at first thought he was just sleeping. I never got to say good bye. He showed no real symptoms. He had lost a little weight and was eating less, which was normal when the weather turned warm. 

I still miss him so much....

Please know you are not alone. I believe and know that any creature who is loved and loves back, according to it's ability to love lives eternally and the bond we have will unite us never to be lost again.


----------



## joeyandaleethea

I am so sorry for your loss. The photos of Duncan are beautiful, he was a handsome boy.

I know of your pain.


----------



## cta

i'm sorry for your loss. it makes me so sad reading all these threads about this horrible disease. i hope the pain subsides as the days pass.


----------



## elsie

:hug::hug::hug:


----------



## dakotachloe

I think of him every day. It's hard to believe it's only been 6 weeks since he has been gone. It feels like so much longer since I haven't seen him, held him. My cat now sleeps in bed next to me where Duncan used to sleep, it's one of the comforts my other pets have offered me. 

The pain isn't as raw as before and I am not crying every day so that is a relief that the grief isn't right there sitting on top of me, but I do miss him so much.

I'm so sorry to the others that share in the pain this disease causes. I'm thankful for our experience, that we got some extra time with him, although it wasn't much. I feel so very bad for those of you who just found your precious pet gone with no real symptoms. That was our fear, so I'm so glad we were home with him, helping him cross the bridge. There really are no words to describe how painful it was to watch but I'm so glad we got to be with him til his last breath. 

Ok, no crying at work. Thanks for your kind words and my heartfelt sympathy to those who are going through the treatment of this disease right now or who have recently and not so recently lost their friend.


----------



## OriginalWacky

I'm a ways out from the most recent dog loss, and I can say that it will never completely go away, but it does keep getting just a little better. Hugs to you.


----------



## dakotachloe

It'll be 2 months tomorrow since we lost Duncan. I've been crying this morning in the peace and quiet before my husband wakes. I went to a pet loss support group on Thursday night and I don't know if it helped, it's made me revisit this intense grief again and I really don't want to define Duncan's life by his last month with this horrendous disease, or even his last moments watching him die, but I can't help it. I pray that he was already unaware of what was going on in those last moments because I was sobbing already and didn't/couldn't provide the quiet, calm, peaceful environment they say you should... I have some guilt over that and hope he wasn't scared by my crying and draping him with my body. 
I'm just feeling very sad today and miss my sweet boy. :*(


----------



## Loneforce

Duncan was good looking boy and was lucky having you as his best friend. You are doing the best thing possible by sharring your feelings and talking with other gsd owners. You will always remember duncan as he will you.:rip:


----------



## dotfrag

I am so sorry to hear about your baby. It may have ended up being harder for you but the fact you were there when Duncan passed and saw him through it must have made it so much easier for him. I had to have my baby boy put down last week and my mind is still racing, my heart hurts and I can't figure out how to make it feel any better. 

I know that in time it will get better, each person just needs to heal in their own way. Tears will be replaced with fond memories and will turn the sadness of death into the celebration of life.

Take care.


----------



## dakotachloe

I've had a couple of hard days. It would have been Duncan's 10th birthday yesterday. Next week it'll be 3 months since he left us. The pain has subsided a bit but I still want so badly to hold him and kiss him. I think about him and the tears just fall. I miss him so much. Happy Birthday, buddy! I love you!


----------



## GSDBESTK9

I know what you mean, I created a beautiful video of my boy Mason after his passing and I have not been able to watch it yet.  I'm just not ready.


----------



## elsie

:hug::hug::hug:


----------



## shadow mum

I lost my heart dog Smokey to this on January 31, 2009. He was approx 10 years old. Didn't show any real symptoms until the last day, when he fell over and couldn't get up. I put him on my bed and called the vet and made an appt for the next day. He didn't make it. My husband came home, and laid on the bed beside Smokey, and told Smokey it was okay for him to leave. Smokey licked my DH face and passed. He waited for permission to leave us. It doesn't go away, but it does get easier over time.


----------



## codmaster

Terrible event but a great memory!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## jakes mom

I'm so sorry for your loss. :hug:

We left our last Shepherd with the same thing. Hearbreaking.

_____________
Sue


----------



## dakotachloe

It's been 6 months. How is it that life has gone on without my boy?? I miss him terribly, but I am finally able to talk about him and his shenanigans with a smile. There are definitely hard times where I break down. I just cannot believe half a year has gone by without him. Peace to all who have lost their beloveds to this horrific disease.


----------



## DeucesMom

I lost the dog of my life, Rebel, two years ago to complications from cancer surgery at the hands of a vet who had more ego than skill. I still miss him every single day and I still cry over him sometimes. But I also laugh remembering what a huge goofball he was and the silly things he did that made me laugh 'til my stomach hurt.  

Your heart will never be exactly the same but you will find that one day, you are smiling more than crying. Until then, come here when you need a safe place where you don't have to try to hide or explain the tears. We all know what a broken heart feels like.

{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}


----------



## Sunflowers

dakotachloe said:


> It's been 6 months. How is it that life has gone on without my boy?? I miss him terribly, but I am finally able to talk about him and his shenanigans with a smile. There are definitely hard times where I break down. I just cannot believe half a year has gone by without him. Peace to all who have lost their beloveds to this horrific disease.


I am so very sorry that it is still so raw and fresh for you. May you continue to heal and find peace.


----------



## mrsbuggs

So sorry for your loss, i know how attached you can get , its breaks a heart to lose one


----------



## codmaster

very much so!

it still hurts when i think about our first GSD who we lost to a brain tumor at 5.5 yo!

that happened in 1978!

not as sharp a pain obviously, and we can think of all the good times now!


----------



## robfromga

I'm sorry for your loss. Its difficult. I was there 6 years ago. You will never forget him, but the sadness foes ease. They hold such a special place in your heart. Know he's isn't suffering any more. All dogs go to heaven, especially GSD


----------



## pyratemom

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's been a month since I lost my old guy and I still have days that the tears fall. Coming here and reading the posts that people made and all the good wishes really helped. May your days get easier but your good memories not ever dim. He will be waiting for you on the other side of the bridge.


----------



## sitstay

Jackson's necropsy came back with hemangiosarcoma as the cause of death. My heart goes out to all of us who have lost a dog to this truly devastating disease.
Sheilah


----------



## dakotachloe

It's hardest on the days that are nice and we are outside working, where he would have been right by our sides. A few weeks ago, my husband was clearing some of our land and had the 4-wheeler out and came in at the end of the day and said "Duncan would have had such a fun day". That was so heartbreaking. And I still have my little Eskie and my kitty, and they help heal my heart. I think it's because we tried so hard to help him with surgery and it came on so fast, I wasn't prepared for him to die that night. As unbelievable as that may be, I just wasn't ready (would I have ever been, though?). I miss him terribly. I'm so glad there is a place to come to where everyone knows how special these dogs are and how much a part of our lives they are. Thank you to everyone who commented, it means a ton. Til we meet again, Dunky.


----------



## RebelGSD

I am so sorry. I lost two of mine to this cancer. With BoBo I did emergency splenectomy and chemo - which bought us 4 precious months. But still, this cancer kills so fast. We have to cherish every day with out furkids, as things can go very wrong very quickly.


----------



## Mike & Iana

My GSP got a diagnosis of hemangiosarcoma today... the vet just called me. Mike( my GSP ) had his spleen removed 2 weeks ago. At first we thought it was a hemangioma ( which usually do not cause metastasis ), but
unfortunately it wasn't. I rushed to the internet to google hemangiosarcoma ( because I refused to believe the things the vet told me on the phone ). Now I can't stop crying... I cant stand look to Mike's eyes and not start to cry. He is the sweetest dog ever! He is 8, but he acts like a big baby... He has so much energy! Looks like he is 2!
Next week we start the chemo, but as you knew it for Duncan, I know that it will be only a palliative treatment for Mike.
Searching for hemangiosarcoma on google, I found your post on this forum... I feel a little bit better knowing that I can share this awful experience with others. But today ( and for the next months ), nothing will be able to make me happy.
I'm only 18 and Mike is part of my history. We grew up together and I wish we could die together.
Poor Iana will lose her best friend. I know it's not fair with her, but now 90% of my attention is for Mike.
If anyone could answer me a question, I would be thankful... Does the dog suffer a lot during the chemo? Are the last days of living, painful?

Best wishes for all


----------



## codmaster

[email protected]#$! Terrible news!

Our deepest sympathy for you and your dog!

Stay in touch with the group - great support from members here!


----------



## Magwart

We lost our beloved Ivy to this wicked cancer in April. It took her suddenly, and without warning. It's a truly evil disease. I've never felt as helpless as I did the night she collapsed and the e-vet gave us the diagnosis. 

A tumor in her spleen had burst, and the cancer was already in her lungs and liver too. It was in too many places for surgery or chemo to have any real chance to save her. They thought she might have a few days, at most. It turned out to be just a few hours. They stabilized her and made sure she wasn't in pain so that we could bring her home for the night. She passed away at 6:30 the next morning at home, in the safe, familiar bedroom where she always slept. She took her last breath cradled in my husband's arms as his tears ran down her fur. Her whole pack was there to thank her for the many wonderful years of friendship. It was the loving passing she deserved.

Mike & Iana, treasure whatever months you have together. I wish you all the best with the chemo. Let us know how he's doing.


----------



## doggerel

I am so sorry for your loss. How truly and sincerely heartbreaking. I hope you can be comforted by your joyful memories of him in the days and weeks to come.


----------



## dakotachloe

It's been ONE YEAR. A year ago tonight my boy, Duncan died at home, with us after a very short battle with HS. We have missed him every single day since. We still have my precious Eskie, who has been instrumental in getting me out of the house and thanking God for every day I have with her, as all life is so very fleeting. I can still feel Duncan's paw on my arm, ache for him to be in bed with us, taking up my spot, and moaning when I try to get in next to him. Oh geez.... crying at work. Better stop. Just wanted to say that I miss my boy, but to those who are just starting this **** of cancer or knowing it's nearing the end, it does get better and I am able to talk about the silly things Duncan does, and think of him and smile. But since my boy was so much like a person, with his own personality and opinions and likes and dislikes - it's like there's a hole there that won't ever be filled. I miss him terribly. I love you Dinky.


----------



## readaboutdogs

Was just reading your thread, just starting to "remember" all the little cute/silly just Cody stuff Cody did. He passed back in sept. when he died its like his death and the couple hours we were with him that day and his illness were all I could remember. The grip of it is still strong, but starting to think more of things that made him dear to me, just him being the free spirit he was, doing life the Toey Yo way. There'll never be another like him! So glad I was the one to get to share his life with on this earth and time!


----------



## selzer

It will be three years in March since I lost Arwen. There is something, every day that brings her to mind. She was my heart dog. She had hemangiosarcoma, but she did not suffer, she passed on her cot with a very peaceful expression. And it has gotten easier. But I still think about her all the time. No way could I name another Arwen, not yet, not now. She was truly one of a kind. I have others that are really special too, and when they go I will be just as devastated, but they cannot eclipse the place in my heart I have for her.


----------



## Debbieg

It will be 4 years in May that I lost Eli to hemangiosarcoma at age 8 and like Arwen he passed peacefully in his sleep. He was my angel dog through cancer, raising 4 kids through the teens years. He gave me so much more then I gave him. My needs were his commands and he lived to fulfill them. I think about all those nights, in pain from cancer , while my family slept, Eli sat up with me. And he never even let me know he was sick until he was gone.

Benny has my heart too, but there will always be a special place for Eli and other dogs who have been my special companions along the way.

I am grateful for a forum like this where people understand the bond.


----------



## Kelli Cone

Cancer took my Best Buddy Monday. I can't stop crying. Here is what happened... I hope it helps others know what to look for.. Better than I did. 

Rio turned 8 in October. I knew you had the BMD and that was partially why I wanted to tell you. We had warning signs but not until it was too late. I spent the day crying and reading online, and actually discovered what I had missed and mistaken for other things. I think sometimes that makes you feel even worse, but one must educate herself. Rio was always fattish..... So, we passed some things off to that but we probably should have paid more attention other things. I switched his food shortly after Clyde died because he got real itchy. I thought he had developed an allergy to gluten or maybe whey so I looked for food for sensitive coats. I switched him to Iams for sensitive coats which had fish and no rice. He would get hot spots which was normal for him but went away quickly with hydrocortisone spray. But he got these weird scabby things that looked almost like pimples that had popped but had scabbed. They would heal up once I treated them but always come back and always in the same spots. I brushed him at least 4 times a week just to control the shedding so I knew his body really well and he never had those pimple things until about 4/5 months ago. I took him to the vet and they did scrapings and said he did not have a parasite so we thought it was the food. The change in food helped, but it did not clear up 100%. He had blood work and fecal and nothing came back weird so...... Apparently this is a symptom I missed. Again, he was always fattish... He was just a HUGE dog so when we would go for walks he got tired... More recently he couldn't make it around shaker lake behind our house. I had to stop with him several times and let him catch his breath. I thought it was his weight. He always got so excited about his walks.... And I figured it was good for him. But it appears now that he must have had pressure on his heart and lungs. He never complained to me never whimpered never acted out... Always so sweet and kind. The last month he had a real hard time coming up from the basement. Again, I thought cause those stairs are a litter steeper than the others in the house he had a hard time and we have the spindles out on half due to the remodel that he was maybe nervous about that. It turns out this tumor was about 15 to 18 lbs. That's a lot of weight to carry up the stairs with a bad heart and lungs. I think Larry kept him going for as long as he could, and he was happy to have him around. The last few days he did some weird stuff. He would come and look at me for no reason. I would ask him if he wanted to go out and he got excited and would go to the door, but not go just want to come back in and be with me. Always sitting by me... more than normal and sleeping on the hardwood floor next to my bed instead of on his bed at the foot of our bed. He would come sit by me while I was in the bathtub too which he only did during storms... This was all the time.... No storms. He was trying to tell me something was wrong. Friday / Saturday he started drinking tons of water...... tons ! Clyde started this too... The Dr. thought Clyde had diabetes, but those tests were inconclusive. Clyde had anxiety and we got him meds for that and once he did 4 months of anxiety meds (Clyde) he was fine and no more water issues. No more meds.... I thought maybe Christmas stressed Rio out. Hence the water and that it would pass, but it didn't so I watched him..... Closely. He went outside one time and ate a bunch of snow and threw up bile. Then the diarrhea started. So we did the chicken and rice thing which we did shortly after Larry came also. Rio ate some of Larry's chew bones and the next day we had a mess.. .I assumed the bones were the culprit, I was wrong. But I treated it and it passed in 4/5 days and all was well again... I was wrong apparently again.... Some posts show people who's dogs throw up after eating snow but it it is usually due to them eating snow and ice melt etc. this was not that at all. He was no where near it. Then, Saturday AM he drank water and stopped between the kitchen and the backdoor and just couldnt hold it anymore. I knew then we had a major issue. Rio had never ever ever had an accident and this wasn't a rebellion type (you have a new puppy issue) it was a mom, something is wrong issue. I have an online vet I have talked to for a long time and he is pretty good about calming me down. My parents took away my medical dictionary when I was a kid cause I had every person including myself diagnosed with an incurable illness....I had pinned all of these problems with mr. fatty down to either the puppy chew bones or allergies because Rio was young and healthy and there is no way he could have cancer.... But I was being defeated, and my Buddy was trying to tell me and I was too stubborn to listen. So after all that, I found a vet not ER or mine that was open on Sunday cause I just didn't think I could wait any longer. Turned out the Vet that was working that day was the Veterinary Oncologist at Case and regardless of the cat smell in the place I think the lady was good. Rio had also had back in Oct, a lump on his shoulder that I had the vet take a biopsy on that turned out to be a fatty tumor. I showed her this and she was concerned. I told her it seemed bigger to me that before. She said she couldn't get her fingers around it and it felt like it was in the muscle. I had made a habit of feeling Rio's tummy since the "Puppy bone" incident to see if I could feel the rawhide I just knew was still there cause he bowels never went back the way they should have been, and he never winced, but I felt what I thought was a fat glob ( not a vet clearly). I showed her this as well. When she felt it and went "Oh Dear".... She told me he had a football size tumor in the location of the spleen and liver and that was just what she could feel. Along with the symptoms she wanted to do an X ray to verify but needed the blood work to make sure he was okay for the anesthesia for the Xray. She said if he got worse to call her. She gave us some Tylan to put on his food to help the Diarrhea. That stuff tastes like crap. He turned up his nose at his chicken and rice. So I made him a hot dog bun with cheese and tried to hide the tylan in it and fed him in little pieces by hand. He looked at me and gave me the face of mama.... only cause you are asking me to do this will I do it.... He made it through a little more than 3/4 then said he just couldn't do it anymore. He slept through the night and the next morning he was happy and wagging his tail. I thought!!! WOW IBS! Then the water drinking again. He let Larry (the puppy) just abuse him that morning, and he usually just put his paw on Larry when he had had enough for the puppiness. So I pulled Larry back. Rio







was so lethargic that even Larry couldn't make him perk up. With no tylan on his chicken he turned his nose up and then the drinking stopped too. By about 3 pm he hadn't really moved much and seemed like he knew me one min and the next he could barely hold open his eyes. Clydes Tumor ruptured and we knew it when it happened. This one took Rio's organs first, and the symptoms of bile diarrhea and vile vomit and excessive water is what tipped us. Not the big collapse that Clyde had. Thank goodness. I called the Dr. and the tests were still not back yet, but she said that she and I knew that regardless of the test would come back as and we really only needed to make our decision on how we wanted to handle the tumor. . I couldn't take him. I had just done it with Clyde and Rio was supposed to be with us for another 3-4 years. My husband said he would take him and asked if I trusted him to make the decision after talking to the Dr. again. I tried to justify to myself that I had to get my daughter from school and our young son just could not go cause it would be too much for him (why do we lie to ourselves??????) I was just a wimp! My husband was there when Rio went to sleep, but I wasn't. I feel so guilty and I cannot stop crying. I know it will come around and all will be okay, but I miss his big eyes and his gooshyness. I guess the moral of the story is don't be a wimp Kelli. Thanks for letting me get this out. It actually made me feel better.


----------



## GSDLoverII

You are not alone. We lost 2 to hemangiosarcoma within 1 year. They were both only a little over 10 years old.
It is devastating and it happens far too often with this breed, and it happens very suddenly.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Anybody who has been through this understands what you are going through.
Try not to feel guilty, you did the best you could.
With deepest sympathy.
Godspeed Rio :rip:
{{{Hugs}}]


----------



## GSDLoverII

And for Clyde too. I just reread your post and was a little confused but I gather you lost 2 dogs to hemangiosarcoma? 
Again, I feel your pain and you are not alone.
Don't beat yourself up, you dealt with it the best you could and Rio was not alone when he died.
:hugs:


----------



## Crazee4gsds

So sorry for your loss. We lost our boy in September to hemangioscarma as well. I too missed very slight signs and he never let on until it was too late. So stoic and regal right up until the end. Just so difficult and the suddeness of it all.


----------



## dakotachloe

It's been over a year and a half since we lost Duncan and honestly not a day goes by without thinking of him and missing him. I still struggle with not replaying his death over and over in my head. His cancer didn't define who he was - such a sweet, gentle, big baby of a GS. I'm sorry to everyone here who loses a dog to Hemangiosarcoma. It's such an awful disease. Just know you are not alone and that there are many of us here who have experienced it, which doesn't make it better, but may help you to get through it and talk about your own experience.


----------



## shepherdmom

dakotachloe said:


> It's been over a year and a half since we lost Duncan and honestly not a day goes by without thinking of him and missing him. I still struggle with not replaying his death over and over in my head. His cancer didn't define who he was - such a sweet, gentle, big baby of a GS. I'm sorry to everyone here who loses a dog to Hemangiosarcoma. It's such an awful disease. Just know you are not alone and that there are many of us here who have experienced it, which doesn't make it better, but may help you to get through it and talk about your own experience.


I'm sorry for your loss. I feel for anyone who loses a dog no matter what the cause. We lost our boy to DM November 2011 and it still hurts and there is still a empty hole that can not be filled.


----------



## Daisy

My condolences for the loss of your beautiful Duncan. My GSD is only 4, but I tear up even now when I think of ever losing her. I pray you find peace and are able to remember him with joy.


----------



## Susie07

I had no idea hemangiosarcoma was so common until I read this thread because I lost my last German Shepherd, Shelby, to that horrible disease last summer at the age of 12-1/2. I was told by the vet that there is no way to detect it until the symptoms present themself and, by then, it's usually too late because hemangiosarcoma is so aggressive. I noticed a lump on Shelby's back right hip, so I took her to the vet. During the exam, the vet noticed that her abdomen was bruised, so they did an ultrasound and discovered masses on her spleen and stomach. My vet sent her to an emergency hospital that had state-of-the-art equipment and a brilliant surgeon. He performed surgery and removed the lump and her spleen and she came through it with flying colors, and I was able to bring her home 4 days later. She was back to her old self again but, about 8 days after I brought her home, another lump popped up on her back left hip, so back to the vet's she went and they sent her back to the emergency hospital. Since it was the Friday of a long weekend and no tests could be done until Tuesday, they just monitored her and kept her comfortable. Another ultrasound revealed more masses in her stomach and on her kidneys, so there was nothing more they could do for her. They prescribed pain medication and told me to take her home and give her lots of love. She was fine the day I brought her home but, the next day, she refused to eat or get up, so I knew what I had to do. My heart goes out to anyone who loses their dog to this dreadful disease.


----------



## dakotachloe

Thanks for everyone sharing your stories. It helps to talk with others who see that the GS is in fact, just a very hairy person with a tail.  I wonder what it is about Hemangiosarcoma that just loves the GS spleen and liver? (I know there are other breeds that it's common in as well, but this is a GS forum after all.)


----------



## Samurai Sam

*My hemangiosarcoma story*

I found this forum looking for answers after my best friend died on Monday, three days ago. It does help knowing that others have experienced a similar story, although I'm terribly sorry for your loss. It is incredibly difficult to deal with considering how fast we lost our big guy. Like many of yours, he seemed relatively normal up until his spleen ruptured. In hindsight there were few minor symptoms that we dismissed... On Friday I was trying to jog with him and his back end began convulsing and he laid down against a stop sign. I thought he had hip dysplasia. My husband thought maybe a torn muscle. Saturday he was pretty lethargic. We still thought it was an osteoarthritis issue and called the vet to bring him in on Monday. Sunday he was doing much better and we even thought about cancelling our appointment. But, Monday morning he seemed bloated and again very lethargic. We got the news at our appointment on Monday after x-rays and ultrasounds, that we needed to put Sam down in the next couple days. We had only enough time to say our goodbyes. He was covered in tumors on his spleen and liver, his spleen had ruptured, and he was bleeding internally. I just happened to be at home that day because my infant son had an ear infection. My dog walked in the house and laid down in the foyer and was dead within 20 minutes. I was sitting with him and petting him and telling him how much I loved him when he passed. I'm still in shock. His hair is all over our house and for the first time I don't want to vacuum it up. I hate that I'm a part of this forum. I wish he were still here. **** this disease. We are having him cremated and spreading his ashes at the lake. Swimming was his favorite thing to do. I hope you all find peace and I look forward to the day when I can remember the good times and not the flashbacks of his final moments. I feel guilt that I let him down. I wish I could have kept him from this.


----------



## Nigel

I'm sorry you lost Sam, I've lost two myself. I had no idea how many others have gone through this until coming here. RIP Sam


----------

