# Growling at my husband



## Dainerra (Nov 14, 2003)

Freya has developed a new problem over the past 2 weeks. She has started growling at my DH. I've been sick and that is when it started. Now, she growls every time she sees him and runs away.

The only thing different is that he has taken over primary feeding of the dogs. She is refusing to eat and if she even hears him moving in another room, she starts growling. He, understandably, doesn't want her to stay if we can't figure out how to stop this.

The very first time, he was coming into the bedroom to check on me after my ER trip. She growled when he came close to my bed. From there, it's escalated to every time she sees/hears him! At first, I thought she was resource guarding me, but now I'm unsure. If he looks at her, she stops growling, wags her tail and then runs past him and out of the room. He/I have not done anything to punish her for growling, she just stops on her own then runs away.

Another possible idea. She was spayed the week before this behavior started. All of her drs/vet techs were female though. And I was the one who took her for all the nasty appts at the office. So don't THINK she would associate it with him, but you never know..

HELP!!


----------



## Lilie (Feb 3, 2010)

Aggression could be the result of an illness. You stated that she was just spayed. I wonder if she has developed an internal infection. It looks like the surgery was 3 weeks ago. I'm not sure if she could still be having complications due to the surgery. 

Remember, any time she displays a behavior that is not acceptable, you must correct her. It sounds like it'll be difficult due to you being ill. Maybe some one on this board would have some good ideas for you. 

Good luck, and I hope you are feeling better soon!


----------



## Dainerra (Nov 14, 2003)

she doesn't have an infection, though she was on antibiotics because she pulled her stitches. It was a "just in case" treatment though.

she doesn't like change, though and stresses easily. I've tried not to correct her for the growling, as I don't want her to learn to "not growl". I just haven't been able to figure out what is setting her off.

The first time was when he approached me. I was figuring it was resource guarding as both the dogs had been planted beside me since I came home from the ER. I said "Freya!" when she growled; I was too shocked to think because she hasn't growled at anyone since we brought her home. She looked "ashamed" then started submissively licking his hands and was fine. 
But, now it's escalated to her growling when he enters the room. I've been having him give her a command, such as sit. and she complies immediately and then either runs from the room or goes all submissive licking his hands.

Obviously, this can't continue. He doesn't want her around if she is going to be this way. He doesn't want to feel like he isn't allowed in his own house, which is the way Freya is acting. She doesn't "like' him anyway. Before coming here, she had never had any interactions with men, so she's always been very afraid of him. Now, I just don't know! She had been doing much better and she often likes to nudge him for attentions. Now, she growls if she hears him moving around in another room.


----------



## TxRider (Apr 15, 2009)

Dainerra said:


> she doesn't have an infection, though she was on antibiotics because she pulled her stitches. It was a "just in case" treatment though.
> 
> she doesn't like change, though and stresses easily. I've tried not to correct her for the growling, as I don't want her to learn to "not growl". I just haven't been able to figure out what is setting her off.
> 
> ...


Maybe you need to take a month off away on a long vacation and leave her with him... 

Seriously, he needs to build a relationship with her or things aren't going to work. Meaning him and the dog need to work it out. Which means you may need to ignore her, send her away from you whenever she does this, etc.

My girls didn't like men either, tough nuggets they got adopted by a single man. They no longer have that problem and trust men fine now.. 

He should likely be the only one feeding her, maybe even from his hand at first, walking her for long walks daily, doing training sessions daily, and leaving you a bit more out of the picture and I can't imagine she wouldn't form a good bond with him. And he should likely do it now before things escalate.

I don't subscribe to not correcting bad behavior because they might just learn not to growl but bite instead. While I believe it's possible I have never seen it actually happen, every dog I have ever corrected associated it with the intention behind the growl, not the growl behavior itself.


----------



## APBTLove (Feb 23, 2009)

I agree, you need to distance yourself a bit from her and have DH take over a lot, with training, walks, feeding, everything. I think a harsh correction is in order from you for growling, you don't growl at pack members. I agree with Tx Rider. That's like not correcting a dog for lunging at cars, saying they won't associate it with going after the car, but will associate it with the lunging movement. That is only my opinion. My boy growls or goes for someone I correct him and he lays down. 


Honestly it sounds like she is confused about her position in the pack, or has something wrong upstairs. If she's allowed on the bed/furniture, make sure she's not anymore, that is for you and DH, not her until she stops this behavior.


----------



## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

I think it all has to do with you. Not necessarily resource guarding but they sense when you are sick. She started this when you first got sick and growled when he came near the bed, right? She's closer to you than your husband?

After I was in the hospital for a couple days, Jax acted funny when I got home. She was more aggressive towards the other dogs, chasing them away from me. It's like their world gets tilted and they don't know how to right it.

Just be patient. Have him throw treats when he comes into the room so she knows he's not a threat (even though she already knows this...once again...her world got rocked and she's confused). She'll eat when she gets hungry so have him continue to feed them.

Does he take her out to play with her? It sounds like now is a good time for them to form a closer bond.

Don't correct her for growling. But you already know that.  It took Jax awhile to calm down.


----------



## Dainerra (Nov 14, 2003)

she won't eat treats from anyone else. they just lay there on the floor. she was getting along fine with him for the last bit. She will still seek him out for attention, but if she's in the room and he enters she growls at him?

She doesn't deal well with change; I think that is her biggest problem.

He's been giving her a command when she growls, usually sit or come and then huge praise when she obeys. I just can't figure out what (besides the changes with me being sick) could have set her off?

none of the dogs have ever been allowed on the furniture, so that's not an issue. And they both always move aside when people walk through. 
She's been getting an "AH" and a command to follow when she growls. Then praise. I'd like to stop it before it starts, but haven't figured out what the trigger is


----------



## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

I think the change in the routine and you being sick is the trigger. That's all it took for Jax.


----------



## Dainerra (Nov 14, 2003)

we'll keep on with what we're doing then. an "ah" correction which seems to break her concentration and then a command. After the growl, she is always submissive and fawning all over him, licking his shoes and hands


----------



## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

ahhh...poor girl...she's just confused.


----------



## valreegrl (Nov 11, 2009)

I have to agree. They are habit animals...and when their schedule has changed for whatever reason, they react. 
And maybe her growling isn't out of aggression as frustration. You are not the primary caretaker at the moment and she could just be finding her way. 

For example: My daughter's Asthma has been really bad these last couple days. To the point that I scrubbed her room, washed everything and shut her door. No animals, no open windows and her air cleaner is running. 
Last night she had a bad attack. And I was going in and out of her room, shutting the door behind me, to get meds. Poor Timber was a ball of mess. It was late, past bedtime and I wasn't in bed. Worse, I shut him out of the room I was in. 
I found him trying to shove himself into the corner closest to the door and whinning. 
He was confused. His schedule was screwed up. And he didn't know what was expected of him at that moment. 

I am sure Freya feels the same way. A sick mommy takes down the household every time


----------



## ILGHAUS (Nov 25, 2002)

Sounds like she is unsure who is in charge of the family now. Being fearful by nature she is now more nervous not knowing if responsibility will have to fall on her. 

So she knows that your husband is over her, you need to pretty well ignore her for several days. Let your husband do everything from feeding to walking to showing affection to several obedience sessions everyday. It doesn't really matter if she thinks he is #1 or you are. She must always know that she is always #3 (or lower if there are other members in the familiy). She must be secure in knowing that the people are always in charge and that she will never be called upon to stand up and bear that burden.


----------



## shehulk (Jan 18, 2010)

Not from my personal experience but our breeder just told me a few stories of similar circumstances. She said GSDs are extremely sensitive to their handler's vulnerability and will become extra protective (i.e. the growling) when they sense you're weak (in this case, sick). I think she's just being protective and it's her warning to your husband to keep him where he's at, "Stay right there, let me make sure you're safe to have around." Once she's confirmed he's no threat, she approves, shows affection and lets him through the checkpoint. That's a possibility.

Are there other situations where your husband appears like the bad guy? I.e. do you fight, talk loudly with one another, etc.? It could be that your illness is a culmination point of previous experiences (or inadequate positive interactions) between your dog and your husband.


----------



## PupperLove (Apr 10, 2010)

shehulk said:


> Not from my personal experience but our breeder just told me a few stories of similar circumstances. She said GSDs are extremely sensitive to their handler's vulnerability and will become extra protective (i.e. the growling) when they sense you're weak (in this case, sick). I think she's just being protective and it's her warning to your husband to keep him where he's at, "Stay right there, let me make sure you're safe to have around." Once she's confirmed he's no threat, she approves, shows affection and lets him through the checkpoint. That's a possibility.
> 
> Are there other situations where your husband appears like the bad guy? I.e. do you fight, talk loudly with one another, etc.? It could be that your illness is a culmination point of previous experiences (or inadequate positive interactions) between your dog and your husband.


I was just thinking the same. She can probably sense that you are weak, and in the wild it's the weak that are targeted. She probably feels that you are in danger and she needs to guard you.


----------

