# Dog friendly with every dog except 1?



## Gilly1331 (Apr 16, 2011)

During doggy play dates there are these 2 dogs that I have a question about. Can two intact males that are approx the same age (about 2 months apart one GSD and one Doberman) that are other dog friendly with intact and spayed/neutered dogs have a problem with just 1 specific dog while being friendly with all others? Both males have been around older, younger and same age intact males with no problem but just these 2 specific males just don't see eye to eye with eachother. It hasn't gone beyond some barking, grumling, t-ing up, or them running and splitting the play group when playing but both owners repremand both dogs anytime either male does this but they eventually go back to this same things during the play dates. It just seems like these two males are fine with everyone just not eachother is it possible a dog can pick and choose their friends? The two owners always tell everyone they have grown up together since they intro'd both males at 4-5 months of age now both are 15/17 months and they see eachother everyday that they are just acting like brothers. 

Anything I can suggest to these two owners about helping them get their two males to get along without constant barking or t-ing up and having to stop the play date to get them playing with the other dogs again? We have play dates bc we don't want to go to the dog parks and have strangers dogs attack us again so our small group of friends get together almost daily and these 2 boys spend more time acting up with eachother than playing with all the other dogs.


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## MaggieRoseLee (Aug 17, 2001)

Dogs definitely have others dogs they love and like and just put up with.

Problem is the if the 'rules' haven't been properly communicated to all the dogs, that you don't have to love each other, but you DO have to be 'polite' then the bullies and bad feelings will come out.

If only ONE of the dogs shows up, is it as bad? Just the Doberman in the group (GSD left home). Or JUST the GSD in the group and Doberman left home? Is the dynamic the same?

I'd try managing the situation and talking to the owners but if they don't actually DO anything, then I'd pass on the doggy play date.


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## Gilly1331 (Apr 16, 2011)

All dogs are happy if one or the other male is not there but both owner have 2 dogs and bring both every time. I can tell both are at wits end as to how to get the 2 boys to get along as they have tried everything from separating, to commands, to laying them on their sides, to treating when they play nice together. Neither is willing to pay for expensive training and both boys are great with ALL the other dogs its just the two boys with each other. The GSD is DEF the more dominant of the two. The GSD will separate out the doberman and t-up and grumble while the doberman will stand there every time and occasionally show teeth but never moves off. The GSD does listen to commans when the owner tells him to leave the other dog and the GSD will move off but will come back sometime later. The Dobermans ears will flop over and he will almost curl under himself while standing while giving the mom make a "him go away look or I'll show my teeth look". Like I said its just a standoff with some noise but has never advanced to the boys acting on their standoffs.

Both boys love every other dog in our group and play wonderfully when they are playing. I don't want to stop play dates as we are all extremely close friends and feelings would def get hurt and we told one or the other to leave one of their dogs home. Its our safe environment that we like vs the dog parks and we rotate between each others houses everyday as to where the play dates are.

*** OH SIDE NOTE*** if we are on a active hike versus just playing in someones yard both boys are focused on the hike and NEVER each other. So they have proven that they can get along when given something to occupy their minds versus free play in a familiar yard. Its when we all sit around talking and throwing a ball to the dogs that the boys stand off but never when we are on active hikes or swims. Its the idle hanging around our yards that they do this.


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## doggiedad (Dec 2, 2007)

some dogs get along some don't. are you sure the 2 dogs
you're talking about are having a problem
with each other or are they playing rough, growling and barking?


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## Gilly1331 (Apr 16, 2011)

doggiedad said:


> some dogs get along some don't. are you sure the 2 dogs
> you're talking about are having a problem
> with each other or are they playing rough, growling and barking?


Doggiedad the two males don't play at all with eachother the GSD t's up to the dobbie male raised hackles and low growling while the dobbie male stands statue still curls his back flops his ears and snarls. Neither moves they stand t-ed up until the owners separate them and get everyone playing again. 

Neither male does this to ANY other dog male or female intact or not its just these two males. I am thinking maybe the GSD doesn't like the fact that the dobbie male is in the pecking order for the females and the GSD is showing that he is ALPA male over the females? The GSD NEVER tries to mount any of the other dogs male or female but the Dobbie male tries to mount the GSD's "sister dog"( the GSD's owners female dog). Maybe the GSD is protecting his sister and the females by showing he is the head male there?


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## PaddyD (Jul 22, 2010)

Except I???!!!! I think you mean 'Except me'.
WHAT is happening to the grammar in America today !?!??
People are saying 'Between you and I' and 'for my husband and I' 
and ' Someone gave something to Bob and I"

Didn't anyone learn about the object of a preposition?!?!?!?

It's ME ME ME ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Lauri & The Gang (Jun 28, 2001)

PaddyD said:


> Except I???!!!!


Ummm, look closely. It says "Dog friendly with every dog except *1*?"

That's the number ONE - 1.


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## Gilly1331 (Apr 16, 2011)

PaddyD said:


> Except I???!!!! I think you mean 'Except me'.
> WHAT is happening to the grammar in America today !?!??
> People are saying 'Between you and I' and 'for my husband and I'
> and ' Someone gave something to Bob and I"
> ...


 
No Paddy you are wrong it is the # 1 not an I. Dog friendly except with only 1 dog understand?


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## PaddyD (Jul 22, 2010)

I owe you an apology.
I apologize.

Digging a hole and crawling into it.


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## Stevenzachsmom (Mar 3, 2008)

Oh Pat, Don't feel bad. I need glasses too. LOL!


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## PaddyD (Jul 22, 2010)

Stevenzachsmom said:


> Oh Pat, Don't feel bad. I need glasses too. LOL!


I get both blind and pedantic after my second drink.


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## bocron (Mar 15, 2009)

I run a private dog park and also do daycare here. There is a doberman that is forever in little tussles with the other dogs. IMHO, dobes in general aren't the greatest group play dogs. The owner is always saying that his dog isn't doing anything but gets picked on all the time. What is actually happening is that the dobe is a punk and has the self-esteem of a dish rag so spends all of his time trying to stand around looking menacing. I finally had to teach the owner a bit about dog play dynamics and show him that his dog, while looking innocent, was actually instigating the tussles almost every time. The GSDs generally pick up on this punk attitude pretty quickly and tend to keep an eye on the offending dog and eventually develop almost no fuse when it comes to the other dog. 
Here is one way I showed the dobie owner what his dog was doing, I told him to stand with me and observe his dog "playing" with another dog. In this case, it was a lab mix. All dog play has rules and format that dogs understand. Usually they start off in a face off, then play bow a bit and eventually wrestle. One dog usually becomes the "victim" in the wrestling match and allows himself to be down on his back while the other dog play bite grabs the neck, ears, whatever. Then after a certain amount of time, most dogs will reverse roles. Here's where the problem comes in, if the dog whose turn it is to be the "victim" has confidence issues than that dog will get nasty when it is his turn to be down on the ground. So of course, it always appears as though the dog whose turn it is to be down is being bullied, when really he is just being a chicken. Certain dogs can get over it and will play with the weak tempered dog but other dogs, tend to try to police the punk dog because he isn't following proper play etiquette. Most dogs learn to quit playing with that dog since it isn't any fun anymore. Kind of like when you were a kid and played school. There was always one kid who always had to be the teacher, and everyone learns not to play school with that kid. 
In most cases, dogs like this usually end up playing with young dogs since they are more submissive about this behavior until they mature a bit, or they play with females who are usually more forgiving. (Unless they aren't and then the females are the ones who will absolutely humiliate a punk dog when they've had it).
I'm guessing here, but maybe you should study the play style of the dogs for a bit and see if you can figure out the issue. There are also dogs who just never like each other for whatever reason, but I have found that usually one of the dogs in a situation like this is exhibiting an anti-social behavior very covertly and we humans are just slow to pick up on it.
We have a male labradoodle here that is also unliked by many of the other dogs in the park, and the owners are totally baffled. I have told them many times that their dog is walking around doing the raised lip threat to the other dogs constantly and they just aren't seeing it. They don't get that their dog is basically walking around flipping the bird at the other dogs and they just don't like him and take every opportunity to express their dislike.
Annette


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## Gilly1331 (Apr 16, 2011)

No hard feelings PaddyD... Lol simple misread 

Bocron thanks for the advice. I'll watch them and see how it goes. The female dobie is kind of aloof and just lays around during the play sessions and the male dobie wants to play with my female and all the other females but just doesn't get along w the GSD. I'll see how it goes.


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