# Jealousy and protectiveness - help me get started on counter-conditioning



## ayoitzrimz (Apr 14, 2010)

Hello,

I have a very specific issue with my 13 month old male GSD (well I have many issues with him but they are all minor and we are actively working on them). This one is very specific and I'd like to start counter-conditioning before he starts to generalize.

When we go on walks (my dog, my live-in girlfriend who has raised him since puppyhood with me, and myself) and my girlfriend walks up to another dog and starts petting my dog goes berserk. He'll start barking / whining / pulling and it will progressively escalade.
Now for some more details:

It only happens when he is on a leash and we are all walking (i.e. in off-leash parks she can pet whoever she wants)
It can happen with males, females, strange dogs, and dogs he's grown up with
It won't happen if the dogs were allowed to meet before my girlfriend went to pet the other dog
He is not dog aggressive in general and will meet all dogs with a happy disposition
He is not dominant towards humans. He is confident, assertive, and outgoing but he'll greet any human with a lowered head, wagging loose body, and open relaxed mouth
He is very submissive towards us BUT he will start to block things out when he goes in drive (partially my fault - I spent the first year building drive for SchH work but should have spent an equal amount of time working on control while in drive. We are working on that though

So, before he starts to generalize (i.e. all dogs being petted are bad --> all dogs are bad --> etc or something like she pet a white dog so this dog is bad --> white dogs are bad --> all dogs are bad etc) I'd like to start conditioning him. 

Any advice? How can I get started? I don't have a lot of owners that will bring their dog in as "helpers" and I can't redirect him when he's getting reactive like this (obviously corrections only put him more in drive). 

I can just say "ok, my girlfriend shouldn't pet strange dogs before he meets them" but that seems like avoiding the problem...

Any advice will be appreciated!


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## gsdraven (Jul 8, 2009)

How active is your girlfriend in his training? Do you guys practice NILIF (Nothing in Life is Free)? 

I think the best way to go about this is to just have your girlfriend greet lots of dogs in his presence and to correct him when he goes crazy. I would correct him verbally first before going to physical since verbal may be all he needs and you don't want him to think petting other dogs means he's in trouble. If he looks to your girlfriend as a leader, it could be as simple as her turning around and telling him "enough". 

Raven didn't used to like other dogs jumping on me but through every day leadership she has learned that I get to decide who I greet, when and how. I've never issued a physical correction, just told her to knock it off when she'd get upset. I can now put her behind me and pet any dog I want no matter how crazy they are acting and she just hangs out there.

Sorry I didn't give you a do this, this and this plan. But just stepping up your GF's leadership and letting him know his behavior is not okay should do that trick. He doesn't own your girlfriend and she decides what she can and can not do.


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## Cassidy's Mom (Mar 30, 2003)

gsdraven said:


> He doesn't own your girlfriend and she decides what she can and can not do.


Yep, sounds like resource guarding, with her being the resource. 

Counter-conditioning means that you'd pair good things for him (giving him yummy treats, engaging him with a tug toy?) with "bad" things (her paying attention to other dogs in his presence) in order to change his emotional response to that type of situation.


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## ayoitzrimz (Apr 14, 2010)

hmmm... thank you all for the responses... these are all great observations.

As far as our household structure:
We've been practicing NILIF since day 1. He'll sit and wait for food, water, play, open the door, put his leash on, get in the car, get out of the car, etc. (sit and wait is general here. We'll make him watch us before he eats, platz (down) before getting out of the crate, etc) There is literally nothing else I can add to the system anymore lol
Now, she does not "train" him as in teach him new commands or take him out to work - tracking, protection, obedience but she will incorporate obedience into their play time (they go out to play in the afternoon, I'm the morning guy) i.e. she'll make him sit and wait before she throws the ball, watch her before engaging the tug toy, etc etc.
As far as resource guarding - it's definitely possible but I wonder why now and why with dogs? He doesn't have any resource guarding issues - I can call him off the couch (not that he's allowed on without my permission) and I can take a bone from him mid chewing without even seeing his eyes go wide, so why now? why only when she's petting another dog... 

Very strange... 

gsdraven: what you said captured my attention. When she was petting a dog recently when this happened I was the one trying to correct him. Perhaps she needs to be the one to tell him enough rather than me...


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## gsdraven (Jul 8, 2009)

ayoitzrimz said:


> There is literally nothing else *I* can add to the system anymore lol


But is your GF doing NILIF for everything?




ayoitzrimz said:


> He doesn't have any resource guarding issues - I can call him off the couch (not that he's allowed on without my permission) and I can take a bone from him mid chewing without even seeing his eyes go wide, so why now? why only when she's petting another dog...


Resource guarding doesn't have to be over things or food and can translate into people. Your GF is a resource to him and just because he guards her doesn't mean he will do it to othe things.

Why now? He's maturing. He's starting get more confidence and is claiming what he thinks is his. 

I noticed a lot of "I"s in your response. This isn't about what you do with him but what your girlfriend does with him. It is her that he is guarding so she is the one that needs to step up leadership.


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## Cassidy's Mom (Mar 30, 2003)

Keefer will sometimes resource guard me against the other dog in the household - he used to do it with Dena and he does it with Halo. But he's never guarded me against any _other_ dog, nor has he guarded anything BUT me around anyone or any other dog. Either me or my husband could walk up to him and take away a bully stick, the most prized thing in this household, (not that we'd actually do that).

He's not jealous of me paying attention to other dogs, it's a very specific situation, usually at mealtimes, but he's also tried it a few times when I'm in the kitchen cooking dinner. I am his human, and by extension my food is his food, not to be shared with the other dog - that seems to be his thinking. It's not a big deal, Dena used to just ignore him when he got snarky, and Halo throws out the most hilariously obvious appeasement signals - I SWEAR she's humoring him! Considering that she rules the roost and everything here is hers (that's the little diva's story and she's sticking to it, lol!), and that he won't even stop her if she dives head first in his food bowl while he's still eating, (no, I don't allow that, the first time I caught her doing it I started closing the kennel door between them while they ate) she's clearly not at all intimidated by him.


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