# Ugh, at a loss



## DorianE (Jan 5, 2009)

I am afraid the time has come to help Herc over the Bridge. Herc is my 16 year old Ocelot that I have spoke about for a while here. He has cancer and has had it for over a year now. It was in his lymph nodes at the time but he was not in any obvious pain. Vet put him on steroids and pepcid to help with the vomitting and to make him gain some weight. He has been acting "weird" the last month or so and has loss a massive amount of his body weight. He now weighs 6 pounds, he was 34 pounds 2 years ago. They say a cat will hide when he is nearing his end or is going through cancer. Mainly due to in the wild, he would be prey. Herc stays in my bathroom, on the side of the tub. This week, every night, I have to clean the top of it. It looks like my son came in and washed his hands off leaving Missouri red clay water stains all over the edge. Herc is bleading somewhere. Possibly urine mixed with it as it dries like it was wet down some. He has lost a lot of his hair, and has this "dander" that falls out where ever he goes. 

Man this is hard!

His body temperature is elevated. Not sure if there is an infection that has started or if the cancer has hit the brain stem which does regulate body temps. I keep looking at his eyes. I keep wishing he would hold up a sign that says I am done fighting. I wish somehow, my mother in law would just take him back during the night while he slept, going back into her loving arms as she has waited for him at the bridge. I wish this wasnt so hard. It is like her dying all over again and my husband is hurting so bad and doesnt want to have to go through all this. 

I am at a loss, think I will just post a picture of this cat that has held my heart for 5 years since my devastating loss of my mother in law in 2003. 










The white flecs you see around him is what is falling out. He is scabbed up all over his body from scratching and digging at himself. Vet finds NO reason he should be doing this. I feed him a diet of raw and now that he has gotten so old, I either shred it or cook it and then blend it for him. Just something that goes with the cancer the vet has said. How can I know for sure what to do?
As you can see, the hair is very thin and you can see his skin in the pic. Maybe if I go to bed, I will find the answer to all this and the strength to do what is probably the best for him. Thanks for giving me the product to just sit here in raw emotions and let it come out without fear. I know this doesnt make a lot of sense. Just ramblings from someone watching her heart shred before her eyes.


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## kaitrinn7 (Aug 14, 2009)

I am so very sorry you are going through this, and that your precious cat is dealing with so much. I cannot begin to know what to say to help, only to tell you that I will be praying for you both.


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## vomonyxhaus (Feb 15, 2009)

I am sorry Herc is not doing well.... I too have been faced with what you are going through now more times than I care to remember and 2x in just the past year.... It is never easy.... But you will end up doing what is best....


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## BowWowMeow (May 7, 2007)

It does sound like it is time. Take good care and give that guy the final gift you can give him.


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## Remo (Sep 8, 2004)

Thanks for taking him in when your MIL passed away. I am sure she has been smiling down from heaven knowing that her kitty was so well loved.

Perhaps it will hurt, just a bit less, to know that they will be reunited again after he goes to the Bridge.


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## WiscTiger (Sep 25, 2002)

I am with Ruth, I think it is time. Herc's quality of life is slipping away quickly now it seems. This is double hard for your DH as this is the last living piece of his mother and your MIL so to speak. I must say that I think you are going to have to be the strong one in this situation. Sit your DH down and talk with him about how much his mom loved Herc and now it is time for Herc to go and be with her. If you can handle it give him permission not to be there to send Herc off, some men don't know how to deal with those emotions.

There are a lot of cyber shoulders here for you to lean on. We all know it isn't easy, but it is the most loving and caring thing you can do for Herc. 

Val


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## middleofnowhere (Dec 20, 2000)

It's hard but it sounds like Herc isn't enjoying life now. Sleep on it and see how he is tomorrow.


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## ninhar (Mar 22, 2003)

It is devestatingly painful to make the decision to give them the final gift of peace when their quality of life has gone. From what you have written that time has come. Herc has spent his life surrounded by people who love him, he is a lucky cat. God speed into your mom's arms, Herc.


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## meisha98 (Aug 27, 2008)

Go in peace Herc knowing you will see everyone again..


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## shilohsmom (Jul 14, 2003)

I am so very sorry. I can feel your pain but am thankful that you've had eachother during what had to of been a very difficult time.


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## JazzNScout (Aug 2, 2008)

Praying for you to have the strength and wherewithall to do what you know is best for your sweet longtime companion. And prayers for healing for you at this terribly difficult time.


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