# Ashes - have returned or not



## Rangers_mom

A couple of weeks ago I talked to the vet about the probability of putting Buzz down soon. She told me to think about whether I want the ashes returned or not and to discuss it with the family. So I talked to my husband and said that I did not want his ashes. At the time, and as usual, my husband said, "whatever you think." So now the time has come and (dh is out of town) in a phone call I mentioned again that we would not get the ashes back. So in typical form dh says "well why don't we leave that up to Rachel (our daughter)". Whenever he says, leave it up to the kids it is secret code for "i want something else and I think the kids will side with me." It is actually kind of a family joke. We laugh all the time that he won't admit he wants something instead he will pretend to be doing it for the kids. Anyway, problem is Rachel doesn't want the ashes either. 

So here is my question. If you had your dog cremated did you keep the ashes? And if you didn't did you regret it?


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## llombardo

Yes I get the ashes. I would regret it if I didnt.


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## onyx'girl

Of course I'd want the cremains...we have a crematorium local, so I go there when I have a pet cremated, they usually have them back to me in 24 hours.


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## Jax08

I don't cremate my pets. However, I always want their remains back. I want them home. It's a 100% personal decision.

Why don't you call your husband back and explain the situation. Tell him you and your daughter do not want them back but this has to be a unanimous decision. His is the deciding factor.


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## pyratemom

I do keep the ashes. They can be displayed in an urn or kept in the box they are returned in but mentally it helped me to know I had Pyrate's ashes and he was still with me in a spiritual way. I did keep his baby teeth and a tuft of his fur in a box that I had long before he crossed the bridge.


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## My2shepherds

I have never had them cremated but I have always brought them home for their resting place. Maybe you could bring him home and bury his remains as a middle ground between your husband's wish to have him there and your wish not to keep his ashes? I have always used the concrete stepping stone kits to create makeshift headstones to mark their graves.


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## Rangers_mom

Wow, I guess I am in the minority. I guess I am odd but I kind of recoiled at getting his ashes back. I feel like the ashes are not him and I don't want to look at them sitting on the mantle or something. I realized this was an unusual response so I was really surprised to see a similar response in my daughter. But now that I think of it we could just scatter the ashes. That would not bother me and I am pretty sure my husband would be happy with that as well. Thanks for the input.


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## SuperG

To each their own....I prefer having a clay imprint of the dog's paw which you bake in the oven and it hardens...with the dog's name and years if you choose. I put the imprint with a favorite picture of the dog and a retired flat collar next to it.....a shrine of sorts, I guess

Never requested the ashes and no regrets.

SuperG


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## onyx'girl

Two of my dogs passed when the ground was frozen, no way could I bury Clover, though we did Stomper....it was very difficult to dig that frozen ground so after Stomper, I've always chosen to have my pets cremated. 
I just had to take my moms 26 yr old African Grey to be cremated. We bought a really nice urn for the ashes.


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## Jax08

You are not odd. It is a personal choice. I don't go up to caskets at a viewing because it is NOT them and I recoil at it. It's personal. There is no wrong decision. Many, many hugs and thoughts for you.


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## NancyJ

I quit keeping the ashes several years ago. Same thing. I love the clay pawprint we were given one time and know to ask for one. .......they almost all will do it.


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## Galathiel

While I 'might' (I never have) have my pet cremated and have the ashes returned, I don't want them displayed, no more than I would have a taxidermist stuff a deceased pet. For me personally, I prefer that they be buried and would bury the ashes as well.


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## Shade

My first dog is buried on my parent's farm. It felt great at the time to know where his body is but now I worry about them moving and him being left behind. It's not like a human cemetery where you know they will always be there. Now I would pay for the private cremation and bring them home and that way they could come with us if we do move.

It's a personal decision however and you need to pick the right one for you. There's nothing wrong with not holding on to the remains if you don't feel a connection to them and that's not wrong either.


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## Rangers_mom

SuperG said:


> To each their own....I prefer having a clay imprint of the dog's paw which you bake in the oven and it hardens...with the dog's name and years if you choose. I put the imprint with a favorite picture of the dog and a retired flat collar next to it.....a shrine of sorts, I guess
> 
> Never requested the ashes and no regrets.
> 
> SuperG


This is me!!! I already have a footprint stone for Buzz. It is in the garden but maybe I should now bring it in. It means so much more to me than any ashes ever could. A picture is a nice addition. I have a frame with 2 pictures of my prefious dog. i love looking at it.


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## Rangers_mom

jocoyn said:


> I quit keeping the ashes several years ago. Same thing. I love the clay pawprint we were given one time and know to ask for one. .......they almost all will do it.


Oh the vet does it? Interesting. Well I have one I did myself several years ago. We did it because Buzz has such huge paws we wanted proof for the future.


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## Rangers_mom

Galathiel said:


> While I 'might' (I never have) have my pet cremated and have the ashes returned, I don't want them displayed, no more than I would have a taxidermist stuff a deceased pet. For me personally, I prefer that they be buried and would bury the ashes as well.


The taxidermist stuffing my pet was exactly the analogy I was thinking of.

But I gues if we get the ashes and bury or scatter them then it would be meaningful to me.


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## NancyJ

Rangers_mom said:


> Oh the vet does it? Interesting. Well I have one I did myself several years ago. We did it because Buzz has such huge paws we wanted proof for the future.


I have pawprints for my last three dogs. I like the idea of doing one in advance though just for memories.


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## JoanMcM

We had all ashes for cats and dogs returned and buried them on our property. Unless you have the ashes in some special containment I think they will just become part of the environment which is a good thing.

My favorite dog I still have the ashes for. I want him buried with my husband or I whoever goes first. My husband thinks this may be illegal but I think if the ashes are sprinkled in at the last moment there is not too much they could do about it.


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

We have the ashes from Daisy and Dodger. I will keep Lucky's ashes when the time comes. I never thought of not getting the ashes but thats just me.


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## Debanneball

We have ashes for Lucky (labx), Lady (GSD), and Stella (GSD).. They are not on display. Whatever decision you and your family come to, it will be the right one. RIP Ranger.


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## Rangers_mom

Debanneball said:


> We have ashes for Lucky (labx), Lady (GSD), and Stella (GSD).. They are not on display. Whatever decision you and your family come to, it will be the right one. RIP Ranger.


Thank you but Ranger is not the one close to death. Ranger is our 2.5 year old GSD. The dog I am writing about here is our 13 year old Australian Shepherd.


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## Rangers_mom

I want to thank all of you for responding to my question. It is very helpful to know that although I am in the minority I am definitely not alone in my desire to forego keeping my beloved pet's ashes. Whatever we decide to do at least I know that I am not hard hearted.


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## ozzymama

I always have my pets cremated and no, we do not keep the ashes, nor do we ask for a separate firing of the retort just for our pets. I believe animals have souls and I believe the body is simply a vessel, to be returned to the earth once we're done. It's such a personal decision. I don't judge anyone who needs the ashes returned to them, grief is handled by all of us in different ways. As an aside, I do have flower saddles made up for my Grandparent's graves, not because I ever go, but because when I am standing at a graveside during a funeral and I like seeing bright colours amongst the cold slate and marble stones. I also never cut flowers in my yard, they are for others to enjoy. Everybody has different opinions and views on the dead and dying.


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## scarfish

i wouldn't want them either. i think it's morbid. your pet can live in memory, i don't need charred remains to keep them in my memory and heart. that's just me. sorry for your loss!


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## blueangele

I kept mine, I bought very nice wooden box urns, once has a laser engraved image of my first dog, the other one has a picture frame with a picture of him. I was a wreck when I lost my first dog, he was definitely my heart dog, and couldn't/wouldn't eat until I got him back, once he was back the grief lifted somewhat. We all handle grief differently, I am one of the empathetic people who can walk into complete stranger's funeral and be crying as much as the family just because of the 'vibe' in the air.


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## Sabis mom

Sabs ashes are in a sealed urn that rests beside my bed. Freeways are on a shelf in the living room. I move them around periodically as I see fit but I cannot imagine not having them. When Shadow goes, she will join them. Maggies are also here in the library, and we didn't even know each other until she was dying. For me it's comforting, but to each their own. I also have collars, tags and photos around.
When Sabs died I released a tuft of her hair into the river on the first full moon and sent her on her journey. Everyone deals with loss differently and there is no right or wrong. As long as it feels right it is.


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## Kayos and Havoc

I did not keep the ashes for my first 2 GSD's. I did not want them and I thought it silly to keep them on a shelf. 

When Max went I had not planned on keeping his ashes but the vet called and said they had his ashes. So I went and got them and promptly put them on the shelf of dining room hutch. 

When our very beloved cat, nacho, passed of cancer last January I would not even think of NOT getting her ashes. She and max are in lovely urns with a picture of each of them next to it. There is a space in the urn for a momento. I have a lock fur in both and Max's collar in his. 

Looking back - I regret not getting Lucky and Wolfie's ashes.


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## LoveEcho

I'm always torn on this. I pride myself in being very logical but the idea of my pet's ashes being thrown in a dumpster gives me the emotional heebie jeebies, so I've always requested the ashes back. With my childhood dogs, we scattered one at the beach where she loved to go, and with the other we buried them and planted a Japanese maple. I think when my own dogs pass, I will scatter the ashes on my farm.


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## scarfish

my cats are going in a trash bag and in the trash can on the curb. it might be hard to do that with a 90+ pound dog so maybe i'll ask work if i can bring it there and put in the trash compactor. i'm sure my wife won't go for that but i'll suggest it.


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## pyratemom

I had never kept my dog's ashes before Pyrate but with him I just couldn't let him go without having something back. He was my heart dog and I needed his ashes to be safe. I don't display them. I just know they are in my room and he is safe. For those that do special displays I think it is very nice but I don't have that big of a house and I need to stash away a lot of stuff. Once in a while I get the box of Pyrate's ashes out and hold them for a few minutes in my lap when I am missing him and looking at his pictures on the wall. I have a wall where all my dog's pictures hang. Yes, I still cry.

My cats get buried in the yard under a palm tree we planted for my pet cemetery. The dogs are too big to dig a hole for because our ground is all coral cap rock. I have a family of cats buried around the palm tree. Most of them were related to each other and I felt they should be together. Others were family cats that lived here all their lives. I also have a rabbit, some chickens, and one iguana buried in my cemetery.


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## My2shepherds

scarfish said:


> my cats are going in a trash bag and in the trash can on the curb. it might be hard to do that with a 90+ pound dog so maybe i'll ask work if i can bring it there and put in the trash compactor. i'm sure my wife won't go for that but i'll suggest it.


Oh.... ever the pot stirrer!oke:Is it from boredom or just purely your enjoyment?


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## NancyJ

I think this is such an insanely personal decision that there is no "right" answer. I am just relieved to realize I am not the only one who does not keep ashes anymore..........


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## Rangers_mom

LoveEcho said:


> I'm always torn on this. I pride myself in being very logical but the idea of my pet's ashes being thrown in a dumpster gives me the emotional heebie jeebies, so I've always requested the ashes back. With my childhood dogs, we scattered one at the beach where she loved to go, and with the other we buried them and planted a Japanese maple. I think when my own dogs pass, I will scatter the ashes on my farm.


You know i can totally relate to this. The one thing that does bother me about not getting the ashes back is the thought of Buzz in a pile of random dead animals going into the cremation oven. Somehow that bothers me.

And I too consider myself logical. What can I say?


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## Sabis mom

Rangers_mom said:


> You know i can totally relate to this. The one thing that does bother me about not getting the ashes back is the thought of Buzz in a pile of random dead animals going into the cremation oven. Somehow that bothers me.
> 
> And I too consider myself logical. What can I say?


 I am not logical. But I do understand symbolism. The ashes are not our loves, they are a symbol. I can understand why the thought is disturbing. What about bringing the ashes home to scatter in a special place? It would give you the comfort and closure that all of you need without the part that bothers you and your daughter.


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## scarfish

My2shepherds said:


> Oh.... ever the pot stirrer!oke:Is it from boredom or just purely your enjoyment?


both

actually as someone stated before i believe the body is just a vessel, in humans and pets. once brain activity is done the individual is done. i don't even believe in souls. souls to me are just a collection of memories in your brain. sure you can revive a dead brain. as long as too many cells haven't perishished to prevent brain function you can get some of the soul back. freezing destroys cells 'cause all the water expands and destroys the cells when frozen so cryovaking dead things makes no sense being all the brain cells are now destroyed.


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## scarfish

on the other hand if keeping a jar of burnt remains helps somebody cope with the loss of a loved one i see no problem with it. i wouldn't do it though.


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## SuperG

Rangers_mom said:


> The one thing that does bother me about not getting the ashes back is the thought of Buzz in a pile of random dead animals going into the cremation oven. Somehow that bothers me.
> 
> And I too consider myself logical. What can I say?



I remember having that internal debate the first time around....when the vet asked what my wishes were for the remains and was educated on the choices ( I guess I was ignorant at the time as I didn't really know I had options ).

To me and this is just my opinion....but once I liberated my furry friend from his struggle...all that was left was flesh and fur...his essence had moved on. If I could preserve my dog's essence via ashes or a burial site, I would do it in a heartbeat. My first dog lives on in my heart and memories and in the essence of the other dogs which I have shared life with over the decades. I don't think the fond memories or tears would have changed regardless what happened after his spirit left his physical body.


SuperG


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## My2shepherds

scarfish said:


> both
> 
> actually as someone stated before i believe the body is just a vessel, in humans and pets. once brain activity is done the individual is done. i don't even believe in souls. souls to me are just a collection of memories in your brain. sure you can revive a dead brain. as long as too many cells haven't perishished to prevent brain function you can get some of the soul back. freezing destroys cells 'cause all the water expands and destroys the cells when frozen so cryovaking dead things makes no sense being all the brain cells are now destroyed.


LOL I figured....

I believe the same, in most respects, as you do. I think the body is a very intricate machine and nothing more. I personally do believe the soul/spirit/energy (whatever you would like to call it) is a real thing and creates the connection we all have as living beings and is released upon the death of the body. 

The comfort I gain from bringing my pets home for burial comes more from the sense of them being back "home" and is definately more idealistic of me than emotional. I have yet to find anything that eases the loss of a beloved pet other than wait for time to make it more bearable.


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## Regen

hmmmm, this really has me wondering. Would you just leave the ashes of a human family member? Would you want to be left? I am fully aware that this is a very personal decision, and they are simply ashes, but I would want to give the same respect to my dogs as to my other family members. 

I am German, and when my father died, his wishes to be cremated were carried out, and he was then laid to rest in a cemetery ( which is mandated by law over there. You simply can't just scatter the ashes wherever you want. They have rules for everything  ) It was a beautiful ceremony and I know where his remains are. It somehow gives me peace knowing that. 

This past year I had my two beautiful GSD babies die within a 5 month time frame. It has been a horrific year. I had them both cremated. I could not imagine just leaving them there. I have thought about scattering their ashes in a field where we used to love to take a walk, and I may still do so, but we also tend to move a lot, so I am not sure. I told my husband, when I die to scatter the ashes with me. I want them with me. I know this may make no sense to some, but it also makes no sense to me to not take the remains. For me it is a matter of respecting them, either by scattering them in a final farewell, or honoring them somehow. It's been an emotional couple of years for me as far as loss goes, so this post really got to me  I also have their paw prints and they are displayed with their pictures.


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## Waffle Iron

I think it is a personal choice. I did not keep Blue's ashes, and I asked around to see if any family ever have and the answer has been no. I'm typically the kind of person that moves on once that chapter closes; keeping reminders around doesn't help me emotionally.


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## Rangers_mom

scarfish said:


> both
> 
> actually as someone stated before i believe the body is just a vessel, in humans and pets. once brain activity is done the individual is done. i don't even believe in souls. souls to me are just a collection of memories in your brain. sure you can revive a dead brain. as long as too many cells haven't perishished to prevent brain function you can get some of the soul back. freezing destroys cells 'cause all the water expands and destroys the cells when frozen so cryovaking dead things makes no sense being all the brain cells are now destroyed.


I pretty much believe this as well. In fact I don't believe in any afterlife at all. Well let me clarify, my religion never talks about an afterlife so it was never something I grew up believing in. I'm Jewish and honestly my religion focuses on life on earth with little to no discussion of what comes next. 

That said depositing my beloved pet in a trash compactor would be outside my comfort zone.


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## Rangers_mom

Regen said:


> hmmmm, this really has me wondering. Would you just leave the ashes of a human family member? Would you want to be left? I am fully aware that this is a very personal decision, and they are simply ashes, but I would want to give the same respect to my dogs as to my other family members.
> 
> I am German, and when my father died, his wishes to be cremated were carried out, and he was then laid to rest in a cemetery ( which is mandated by law over there. You simply can't just scatter the ashes wherever you want. They have rules for everything  ) It was a beautiful ceremony and I know where his remains are. It somehow gives me peace knowing that.
> 
> This past year I had my two beautiful GSD babies die within a 5 month time frame. It has been a horrific year. I had them both cremated. I could not imagine just leaving them there. I have thought about scattering their ashes in a field where we used to love to take a walk, and I may still do so, but we also tend to move a lot, so I am not sure. I told my husband, when I die to scatter the ashes with me. I want them with me. I know this may make no sense to some, but it also makes no sense to me to not take the remains. For me it is a matter of respecting them, either by scattering them in a final farewell, or honoring them somehow. It's been an emotional couple of years for me as far as loss goes, so this post really got to me  I also have their paw prints and they are displayed with their pictures.


Your "respecting the remains" argument is very persuasive with me. I don't have any emotional connection to the ashes but I do have an emotional connection to his body so I would want it treated respectfully. Thank you for your words.


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## GatorBytes

Rangers_mom said:


> You know i can totally relate to this. The one thing that does bother me about not getting the ashes back is the thought of Buzz in a pile of random dead animals going into the cremation oven. Somehow that bothers me.
> 
> And I too consider myself logical. What can I say?


 You might change your mind (don't watch the video)

Last Chance for Animals - Rendering

Rendering is the process by which raw materials (dead animals and animal byproducts) are converted into a long list of ingredients for industrial and consumer goods.
*Sources for raw materials include:
*• meat slaughtering and processing plants 
• ranches 
• factory farms 
• feedlots 
• *animal shelters 
*• *veterinary clinics 
*• restaurants 
• research laboratories 
• road kill 
• pest control companies
*These materials in turn are exported or sold to domestic manufactures of a wide range of industrial and consumer goods including:
*• livestock feed 
• *pet food and treats 
*• soaps 
• pharmaceuticals 
• lubricants 
• plastics 
• shampoo 
• lotion 
• rubber 
• candy 
• lard 
• candles
The National Renderers Association estimated that there are *250-260 rendering plants in North America alone. *The 18 billion pounds of ingredients that renderers produce each year have been valued at more than $3 billion of which $870 million is exported.


*The Rendering Process *
Raw materials (meat byproducts and dead animals) are *ground and placed in cookers, *which evaporate moisture and free fat from protein and bone.
A series of conveyers, presses and a centrifuge continue the process of separating fats from solids. The finished fat (tallow, lard, yellow grease) goes into separate tanks, and *the solid protein (meat and bone meal, poultry meal) is pressed into cake for processing into feed.
*


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## middleofnowhere

It's all symbolic for me. Of course the dogs are dead and their bodies are not going to resurect. 

I burried two about 30! years ago. Didn't know the option of cremation and couldn't have afforded it at that time. I lived in a rental and they were buried on the property. I didn't like leaving them but I couldn't see exhuming them when I moved. Next dog that died also was buried. I found digging the graves theraputic. 

Creation was an option for the next dog. It was a 90 mile or more drive to deliver her body. Her ashes went several different places - some with the dog that was buried on the property because he didn't like to be alone; some by the fence where she would go daily to see my neighbor who adored her; some by a favorite resting place on the property, some 1000 miles away in a river where she loved to swim and a few are still with me. The next guy I had cremated, too as well as the late Barker Sisters. Those ashes are still with me as I didn't want to leave a dog in Arkansas which had very hostile weather for dogs. Subsequent dog that died here was also cremated. The first four ashes are in two GSD cookie jars - what better urn? I'm not sure what I will do with these long term. I haven't thought about it.

It's an individual decision for each person and in each given situation. I don't find anything creepy or morbid about the remains of my pets. Symbolic stuff, yes but there it is, the last physical part of them.

BTW depending upon the facility of course, but the ones I have delt with have said that they place the animals seperately in a group cremation so that the individual ashes you get back will be your dog's ashes - not as sure a thing as an individual cremation but pretty good.


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## Rangers_mom

GatorBytes said:


> You might change your mind (don't watch the video)
> 
> Last Chance for Animals - Rendering
> 
> Rendering is the process by which raw materials (dead animals and animal byproducts) are converted into a long list of ingredients for industrial and consumer goods.
> *Sources for raw materials include:
> *• meat slaughtering and processing plants
> • ranches
> • factory farms
> • feedlots
> • *animal shelters
> *• *veterinary clinics
> *• restaurants
> • research laboratories
> • road kill
> • pest control companies
> *These materials in turn are exported or sold to domestic manufactures of a wide range of industrial and consumer goods including:
> *• livestock feed
> • *pet food and treats
> *• soaps
> • pharmaceuticals
> • lubricants
> • plastics
> • shampoo
> • lotion
> • rubber
> • candy
> • lard
> • candles
> The National Renderers Association estimated that there are *250-260 rendering plants in North America alone. *The 18 billion pounds of ingredients that renderers produce each year have been valued at more than $3 billion of which $870 million is exported.
> 
> 
> *The Rendering Process *
> Raw materials (meat byproducts and dead animals) are *ground and placed in cookers, *which evaporate moisture and free fat from protein and bone.
> A series of conveyers, presses and a centrifuge continue the process of separating fats from solids. The finished fat (tallow, lard, yellow grease) goes into separate tanks, and *the solid protein (meat and bone meal, poultry meal) is pressed into cake for processing into feed.
> *


Yuck! So your saying that if I don't pay to get the ashes back Buzz might go to a rendering plant??? Okay, I do not like that. And moreso I find it really disturbing that I am probably usung items from these plants.


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## ozzymama

Regen said:


> hmmmm, this really has me wondering. Would you just leave the ashes of a human family member?


I already have my stuff planned and pre-paid, cardboard box to burn, unmarked grave. Cost $1,800 a few years back. Everyone who knows me, knows my feelings on death and dying, so if someone were so foolish as to entrust me with their end game so to speak - that's what they are getting. Ok, maybe I'd spring the $350 for a bronze name marker  

If a body is useful after death - use it. It really would not bother me.

My sister does amateur photography, before my collie passed 4 years ago, we did a really nice photo shoot, dh, myself, the two dogs and dd was there, but barely... I had just pee'd a plus sign LOL. Those pictures, I have them with many others on my digital frame in my livingroom, that's where I go when I want to remember Sandi. That's where she is for me. 

Every person is different, I'm not sure dh shares my views. I will come back and haunt him if he hangs onto my ashes. Although with the amount of booze I have put through my system over the years, there will not be ashes, just a giant explosion that takes out the town where the crematorium is located.

Whatever a person decides, is their own decision. In Europe, y understanding was families leased plots in some countries, lease is up, everybody into the communal! I'm sure if it hasn't happened it will to some of my ancients - 'cause I ain't paying!


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## llombardo

scarfish said:


> on the other hand if keeping a jar of burnt remains helps somebody cope with the loss of a loved one i see no problem with it. i wouldn't do it though.


It's not so much about coping but knowing where they are versus where they could have went. I don't display the ashes. I do have the paw print and a picture, but the ashes are put away.


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## onyx'girl

I would be willing to donate a body for scientific research. Parrots need to be studied more. Before my moms bird died, the vet was struggling to find information to help him, we were in contact with many specialists but not enough help was available. A necropsy would have possibly answered some questions. 
But then, that necropsy would have had to been done by someone who knew what they were looking at for diagnoses. 
Time is of the essence too. I felt bad that I brought the body to the crematorium instead of bringing it to a teaching vet college. 
I wish necropsies weren't so costly, because there could be much learned. Though many aren't into having the body violated for that purpose.


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## dogfaeries

I had my 15 year old Siamese cat cremated and kept her ashes. I wasn't really sure what I was going to do with them, so I temporarily put them in my bookcase. 

Fast forward a year. My mother was terminally ill and called me and told me that she wanted me to be the one to pick up her ashes. I asked her what she wanted me to do with them, and she said she really didn't care. I jokingly told her that I would put her ashes next to the cat ashes in the bookcase. So, when the time came, I picked up her ashes, and set them next to the cat ashes. I knew that she would think that was funny.

I've lost 5 dogs since then, and opted not to keep any of the ashes. Not even my beloved Doberman. I have visions of my bookcase being covered with little urns of ashes. Nope.


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## LoveEcho

JoanMcM said:


> My favorite dog I still have the ashes for. I want him buried with my husband or I whoever goes first. My husband thinks this may be illegal but I think if the ashes are sprinkled in at the last moment there is not too much they could do about it.


I don't think it's illegal! My husband had the lovely job of hanging onto his mother's ashes until her dog died  When that time finally came he mixed their ashes and buried them in his family's plot.


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## Renofan2

I have always received ashes and end up burying the ashes in my flower gardens and placing a paver stone to remember them. I lost my Molly almost 2 weeks ago suddenly, and did have her cremated. I haven't been able to bring myself to go and pick them up yet. Come spring I will bury her ashes and mark it with a stone as well as a new plant picked for her. My vet mailed me her paw prints, which was a surprise to get. I am planning to send them out to have a charm made to wear on a necklace along with a thumb print of my brother that we lost 2 years ago in a motorcycle accident. Very sorry you are going thru the same thing as I am.


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## llombardo

I found this company that can make the ashes into a crystal. It was different and they were beautiful.


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## GatorBytes

llombardo said:


> I found this company that can make the ashes into a crystal. It was different and they were beautiful.


 That sounds interesting. Got a link?


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## llombardo

GatorBytes said:


> That sounds interesting. Got a link?


We were at a dog event. I didn't want to think about it, but my sister stopped and got a card. I'll see if she still has it.


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## llombardo

This is it basically

Crystals Made From Ashes | Cremation Crystals | Ashes Made Into Crystals


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## maxtmill

We had our one elderly pug cremated and gave his ashes- it was important to my husband. But I, on the other hand, have a tattoo of each of my dogs, whether it be a pawprint, a noseprint, or face. I wish we didn't have Max's ashes, because they are a constant sad reminder to me, plus now I feel that we are still responsible for him. Does that make any sense? I would like to spread his ashes rather than having to see them up on the dresser every day


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## Arlene/Archer

OP, I don't take the ashes back from the vet either- don't see the point. There's nothing odd in it, do what you feel is right.


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## llombardo

So my question is to those that don't take the ashes back...do you even have the dog cremated or do you just let the vet dispose of the body? 

I understand everyone has their own opinions, but I'm just wondering if everyone knows what happens if you don't claim your dogs body one way or the other?

I also understand that people don't believe there is anything but a "shell" left. But doesn't that shell deserve some respect? We love and respect them while they are here, why would we want their bodies taken to a rendering plant and in 
lots of cases the landfill. So if the thought of having them in the house is morbid or just a reminder, don't you ever think of their bodies rotting away in a pile in a landfill with garbage? 

There is no way I can visualize any of my dogs laying in a mass grave like pieces of garbage.

Like I said I don't display the ashes, but those ashes will eventually come with me.


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## JoanMcM

LoveEcho said:


> I don't think it's illegal! My husband had the lovely job of hanging onto his mother's ashes until her dog died  When that time finally came he mixed their ashes and buried them in his family's plot.


 God bless your husband! And you for being a good Daughter in law!


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## JoanMcM

For folks who never buried a large dog, there is a big difference between burying a 90 lb shepherd vs say a hamster or a cat in your backyard if you live somewhere that is remotely suburban. That is why we started cremating our pets. Now we just cremate.


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## llombardo

JoanMcM said:


> For folks who never buried a large dog, there is a big difference between burying a 90 lb shepherd vs say a hamster or a cat in your backyard if you live somewhere that is remotely suburban. That is why we started cremating our pets. Now we just cremate.


And if the ground is frozen then it's not happening. One can alwsys bury the ashes. That is much easier IMO.


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## ozzymama

llombardo said:


> So my question is to those that don't take the ashes back...do you even have the dog cremated or do you just let the vet dispose of the body?


I pay for the cremation, I don't stand and watch them fire the retort. It's illegal in Canada to dump them at a landfill or sell pets to a rendering plant, it's never been a concern of mine as I have always dealt with vets interested in maintaining and keeping their licenses.

In Canada, Ontario specifically, the rules for disposal of any dead animals are very exact, even removal of dead stock from farms. I'm not buying into fear-mongering and BS. I work for an organization which is closely associated with agriculture. We can't even bring a pig to a fall fair, let the kids pet him or learn about him and take him back to the farm. He must be slaughtered. Disease control is paramount. Given the information I know, information I have garnered, no I do not suspect a vet of unscrupulous behaviour.


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## llombardo

ozzymama said:


> I pay for the cremation, I don't stand and watch them fire the retort. It's illegal in Canada to dump them at a landfill or sell pets to a rendering plant, it's never been a concern of mine as I have always dealt with vets interested in maintaining and keeping their licenses.
> 
> In Canada, Ontario specifically, the rules for disposal of any dead animals are very exact, even removal of dead stock from farms. I'm not buying into fear-mongering and BS. I work for an organization which is closely associated with agriculture. We can't even bring a pig to a fall fair, let the kids pet him or learn about him and take him back to the farm. He must be slaughtered. Disease control is paramount. Given the information I know, information I have garnered, no I do not suspect a vet of unscrupulous behaviour.


Well that might be the case for people in Canada but it's not for people in the United States.


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## SuperG

I believe the only two options regarding cremation at the vet I have used is....a mass cremation if you don't want the ashes or the cremation of one's dog separately, if one wants the ashes....Might be different at other vets, I suppose... 

SuperG


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## llombardo

SuperG said:


> I believe the only two options regarding cremation at the vet I have used is....a mass cremation if you don't want the ashes or the cremation of one's dog separately, if one wants the ashes....Might be different at other vets, I suppose...
> 
> SuperG


Most vets are not going to pay for a dog to be cremated if the ashes are not going back to the owner. Most have a service that will pick up the dog and take it to the landfill or rendering plant along with all the dogs from shelters and stuff.


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## SuperG

llombardo said:


> Most vets are not going to pay for a dog to be cremated if the ashes are not going back to the owner. Most have a service that will pick up the dog and take it to the landfill or rendering plant along with all the dogs from shelters and stuff.


Agreed....but those were the only options presented to me at the vet I use...and you are correct...the vet doesn't pay....I pay. Perhaps, my experience with this vet is somewhat unique or I am in error...My dog has a visit with the vet coming up and I will ask her about the topic again. 

SuperG


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## pyratemom

SuperG said:


> I believe the only two options regarding cremation at the vet I have used is....a mass cremation if you don't want the ashes or the cremation of one's dog separately, if one wants the ashes....Might be different at other vets, I suppose...
> 
> SuperG


My vet uses a mass cremation if a person does not want an individual cremation to keep the ashes. I'm not sure what other vets do but I know what mine does. He does not sell the bodies to rendering companies, of that I am positive. I know my vet very well.


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## llombardo

SuperG said:


> Agreed....but those were the only options presented to me at the vet I use...and you are correct...the vet doesn't pay....I pay. Perhaps, my experience with this vet is somewhat unique or I am in error...My dog has a visit with the vet coming up and I will ask her about the topic again.
> 
> SuperG


I believe that those options are probably available, if the owner pays. If the owner doesn't pay then I think that is when they go to the landfill or rendering plant.


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## shepherdmom

GatorBytes said:


> The National Renderers Association estimated that there are *250-260 rendering plants in North America alone. *The 18 billion pounds of ingredients that renderers produce each year have been valued at more than $3 billion of which $870 million is exported.
> [/B]


I'm not sure why this is a problem. Isn't recycling good?


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## SuperG

pyratemom said:


> My vet uses a mass cremation if a person does not want an individual cremation to keep the ashes. I'm not sure what other vets do but I know what mine does. He does not sell the bodies to rendering companies, of that I am positive. I know my vet very well.



Sounds like my experience with my vet.....exactly.

SuperG


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## shepherdmom

llombardo said:


> I believe that those options are probably available, if the owner pays. If the owner doesn't pay then I think that is when they go to the landfill or rendering plant.


At my vet you pay for any. Cremation without ashes, cremation with ashes or just a simple disposal fee.


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## wolfstraum

Most of my pets have been buried - some at property owned by a vet I worked for years and years ago, others on property owned by another friend.....I have cremated all of my dogs and have their ashes in urns in a bookcase....along with 2 cats that were very special to me and that I could not bear to put in the ground....I want to be cremated as well and then all the ashes scattered/buried together...

When I first starting working at a vet clinic, many years ago, euthanized pets were picked up by a landfill company and that was called "mass burial".....thus, none of mine went that way.

Lee


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## middleofnowhere

OK on the Canadian thing - how interesting in light of the state's impression that Canada is a home to horse slaughter houses. 

On the rendering thing - I somehow thought that was large animals rather than small animals. That's curious too.

At the landfills in the western states I've lived in recently, there is an area for dead animals. I have not looked at this. A friend did dispose of one dog's body this way and swore she would never to it again. I don't consider it an option.

In Arkansas, disposal of a horse was challenging. Due to environmental concerns, she could not be buried on the farm (either too close to a stream or else too rocky). Finally discovered that the body could be taken to the state ag department and then cremated. Retrieval of ashes was not an option. I suspect that she could have been taken to a landfill or to a rendering plant but I didn't want that.


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## GatorBytes

ozzymama said:


> I pay for the cremation, I don't stand and watch them fire the retort. *It's illegal in Canada to dump them at a landfill or* *sell pets to a rendering plant*, it's never been a concern of mine as I have always dealt with vets interested in maintaining and keeping their licenses.


Not true. Rending facility for cats and dogs is in Quebec. It's owned by "Maple Leaf foods". You know the company selling all the chicken
at your local grocery. And the cold cuts, hot dogs etc.


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## GatorBytes

pyratemom said:


> My vet uses a mass cremation if a person does not want an individual cremation to keep the ashes. I'm not sure what other vets do but I know what mine does. *He does not sell the bodies to rendering companies, *of that I am positive. I know my vet very well.


 I don't believe, (or at least hope) vets are selling direct to rendering plants
They put the bodies in cold storage, a second party p/u weekly for example, the third party - the rending plant, then 4th, 5th, 6th party depending on use and so on.

Although after that texas story - frankenvet, I'm sure some have shares


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## ozzymama

GatorBytes said:


> Not true. Rending facility for cats and dogs is in Quebec. It's owned by "Maple Leaf foods". You know the company selling all the chicken
> at your local grocery. And the cold cuts, hot dogs etc.


Are you referring to the rendering plants sold over 2 years ago? 'Cause no offense, now your normally dangerous information has become libelous. 

As most people are aware, Canada got a good grating over the coals in regards to it's meat exporting practices following the expose of horse meat not being sufficiently tested, the EID's being insufficient and perhaps fraudulent. In addition to practices employed by meat producers in the West, including use of rendered animals in vegetarian animal feed. As such, significant changes have been implemented.

As an aside, Maple Leaf, despite the libel here, is a good employer, considered one of the best in Canada, they are considered innovators in their processing standards and the communities where their plants exist, they are among the best in supporting community organizations and children's programs. I don't work for them, I have three jobs, two with accounting firms, I'm a CMA and one where I am an executive on a board of directors for an agricultural society, my husband is construction. I gain nothing defending companies or practices, except I despise misinformation and outright lies being spread - I don't buy Maple Leaf products, I have a butcher, but I will not see someone run down a good company with outdated misinformation.


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## Rangers_mom

Well Buzz is gone. He peacefully passed at his home surrounded by his family and assisted by his gentle veternarian. We are sad. We miss him but it was time.

in the end we chose to have his ashes returned to us. All of your kind and thoughtful response did help me assess the situation.


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## readaboutdogs

I am so sorry for your loss of Buzz. I'm glad that he was able to cross the bridge surrounded by his family. It comforts me to have my boys ashes. Rest in peace Buzz. Peace to you and your family.


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## onyx'girl

Rest in Peace Buzz...:halogsd:
I agree with having the ashes returned, just because. You can choose to do whatever you want, bury them, dust the box they are in or let them blow in the wind during a sundog day.


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## katieliz

Rest in peace, Buzz.

Condolences and many blessings to you and your family.


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## shepherdmom

So sorry for your loss!


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## Lobo dog

I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet old man, Buzz :rip:
When someone posts about their new puppy, I join them in their joy. When someone posts about the loss of a loved pet, I also feel some of their pain. 

May memories of his younger days fill your heart, and may the best times of his life come to your mind. Run free Buzz, then meet your people at the rainbow bridge.
:doggieplayball:


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## GatorBytes

Rest in Peace beautiful doggie Buzz


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## Rangers_mom

Thank you all for your kind words. They are especially meaningful considering I assume that most of you have been here before (as have I).

On a different note I just want to say that I am having some trouble reading this thread when I get to some of the later pages. When I chose say Page 8 it goes from page 8 directly to an advertisement for like Good Housekeeping.


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## Nigel

Rangers_mom said:


> Thank you all for your kind words. They are especially meaningful considering I assume that most of you have been here before (as have I).
> 
> On a different note I just want to say that I am having some trouble reading this thread when I get to some of the later pages. When I chose say Page 8 it goes from page 8 directly to an advertisement for like Good Housekeeping.


My iPad was doing that yesterday, for me, I went to settings > safari> "clear history and website data" 

sorry, had to edit and go back and look.


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## Bear GSD

I'm sorry for the loss of your beloved Buzz. I'm glad you decided to get the ashes back. When I lost my first dog, Pal it was sudden and I didn't keep his ashes, which I regret to this day. When I lost my girl, Elsa I decided to keep her ashes, I have them in a special box where I keep her collar and her favorite toy, it might seem silly but it's a comfort to still have her with me in some small way.


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## SuperG

Rangers_mom,

Buzz had a wonderful steward......I'm glad he was part of your life.

I commend you for your stoic attitude....I'm guessing Buzz respected that about you as well.

Take care,

SuperG


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## Arlene/Archer

llombardo said:


> So my question is to those that don't take the ashes back...do you even have the dog cremated or do you just let the vet dispose of the body?
> 
> I understand everyone has their own opinions, but I'm just wondering if everyone knows what happens if you don't claim your dogs body one way or the other?
> 
> I also understand that people don't believe there is anything but a "shell" left. But doesn't that shell deserve some respect? We love and respect them while they are here, why would we want their bodies taken to a rendering plant and in
> lots of cases the landfill. So if the thought of having them in the house is morbid or just a reminder, don't you ever think of their bodies rotting away in a pile in a landfill with garbage?
> 
> There is no way I can visualize any of my dogs laying in a mass grave like pieces of garbage.
> 
> Like I said I don't display the ashes, but those ashes will eventually come with me.


In answer to your question, no. I don't care about the body one way or the other after death. At my vet's office, bodies are tagged, bagged and left in cold storage until they are collected to be mass cremated. When my last dog was euthanised we left him on the table to be disposed of by our vet. What we didn't do was leave him for one single second before death; we held him and talked to him so that he wouldn't be scared until he breathed his last, then we went outside and bawled our eyes out. He was 15 years old. 
As you say, we love the and respect them while alive, we keep them safe from harm and make sure they live full and interesting, they are loved and treated with affection and kindness. But for many people, and I include myself in this, death is the end of the line. Our dogs are no more, so it matters not if they are buried in a mass grave or burned with multiple bodies, they're gone, but they live on in our memories. It's not a lack of a respect, but rather a differing view on death.


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## Arlene/Archer

Ranger's Mom, I'm sorry about Buzz and I am glad he died peacefully surrounded by those he loved and trusted.


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## Bridget

I have thought of you and hope you are doing ok. I pick up Heidi's ashes tonight. The total cost is $302 for the euthanasia and the individual ashes.


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom

Bear GSD said:


> I'm sorry for the loss of your beloved Buzz. I'm glad you decided to get the ashes back. When I lost my first dog, Pal it was sudden and I didn't keep his ashes, which I regret to this day. When I lost my girl, Elsa I decided to keep her ashes, I have them in a special box where I keep her collar and her favorite toy, it might seem silly but it's a comfort to still have her with me in some small way.


 
This is exactly how I feel.


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## slaen

I know some people have had the ashes returned and put in ink and tattoo'd on them. Like a paw print tattoo or something. I had a silhouette of my dog tattoo'd in my sleeve on my left arm.


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## RZZNSTR

I have the ashes of my Elkhound and (3) of my GSDs. They are all in Cedar boxes and they're on a table in the family room. When its my time they are going to be placed with me.


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## Nikitta

I have only had one dog of mine cremated. I have no desire to have the ashes of a dead animal in my house. ( Each his own ) The place that did it asked if it would be ok if they released them in their garden. I said it was ok. I have buried many of my pets, including my horses, where I have boarded them for years. When I go, I hope they just toss me in a ditch. I'm not there anyway.


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## EazyEandME

I personally, would want the cremains back. Not only did I get the cremains back of my last dog that passed, I had bits of it made into glass jewelry and the rest of it is in the urn, and sometimes when they first passed, I would sleep with the cremains. It's pretty bizarre I know, but I hated not being able to hold my dog anymore so holding their urn was the next best thing. Now I don't sleep with them anymore, I just have them on my dresser. It did help the mourning some initially. :-(


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