# Getting a new dog BUT...



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Below picture is of new possible dog.

Anyway so after 7 months of mourning the loss of my gsd Sailor (still very much mourning) my husband and I are getting a new dog. First I will tell a little bit about his background and why we came to this decision. Then I will tell about the BUT... Part. Hahah

My husband has decided to take on some additional tasks/training for his job that will have him away from the house for weeks at a time. Even though I am not ready for a new dog necessarily because I am still too devastated by losing sailor, logically I was thinking that it would be best to get a new dog. Whether I like it or not, I simply cannot be alone for two to three weeks at a time especially not living in the best area, and there having been home invasions in my neighborhood. We both felt it would be safer to get a protective gsd to keep me company in the house along with the other security features we already have. Ha. 

I was browsing craigslist pet section for fun (I never contact anyone). Originally our plan was to get a gsd from a rescue so I had no intentions whatsoever browsing craigslist. Then, I saw an ad about a gsd that said please help! It was a young woman maybe 22 writing the ad. She said she had a smart gsd that needed to go to a good home. She would not ask for any money. She just wanted to find him a good family. She said she got him as a puppy from a byb. She didn't know any better and said she had never had a dog before in her life. She knew she made a mistake but therefore, had no idea how to deal with the dog once he started growing up. To add to it, she just found out she is pregnant and moving I to an apt that doesn't allow dogs. (We have all heard this story before haven't we?) she says she never walks him because he pulls and lunges at people and that's because she didn't know the importance of training or socializing him. Plus she is pregnant and doesn't want him to knock her down on the walk. She said she knows he deserves better. He needs someone who knows about gsd and how to train, someone willing to work with him. She is not looking to be judged, just needs to find someone who will love him and take him. SO I contact her and I go out to meet her. I am thinking still that I'm not really into it, but on paper he is exactly what I need since I feel like I am kind of in a hurry to get a gsd before my husband leaves. Me being a dog trainer, and having extensive experience with gsd's who better to take him? So I see him and he is delightful enough. There really are no reasons for me not to take him... I tell her a date and time to meet me at my vet to have his health checked out. I told her if there are no major health issues with him, I will take him once the vet gives him a thumbs up. This will happen in the next few weeks. All is good with my plan so far right?

BUT... My heart still belongs to Sailor. I love him and don't feel like I will bond with this dog. Mentally, I have what it takes. The experience, the tools, the patience, the money, the resources, the home, the yard, etc... But I just don't feel bonded or like I could or want to bond to him. I could have gone to look at other dogs but I feel it would be the same story. I just flat out don't want them. 

Then my husband tells me the training he would be going away for, he missed the deadline! So now he is not going away anymore! So now we have no need of a dog, yet I gave this girl my word. I told her I would be taking her dog on said date pending the vet check. I feel like I can't back out. I also feel like even though I don't love the dog, I have what the dog needs and he needs my help. He needs me to rescue him. I feel like I can't let him down either :-( she said if she couldn't find someone to take him she would put him in a shelter. I know people say that all the time. Naturally, if I couldn't take him I would give her contact info for the gsd rescues I've worked with in the past, but that was only if his health doesn't check out. So that is my life right now. I am about to get a dog I don't really want or need, and in not really thrilled about it, but he needs me. :-/ 

I'm not sure why I posted this, I guess just to vent or rant. Thanks for reading people. I hope if I do get him at the end of the month, something miraculous will happen and I'll fall in love with him like sailor. I'm not holding my breath though.


----------



## kelliewilson (Jan 1, 2015)

good looking puppy. get him, train him then find him a forever home. like a rescue.


----------



## Twyla (Sep 18, 2011)

Foster the dog. Contact rescues for courtesy postings and screening of potential adopters.

With your experience, you will be able to see if this is lack of socialization or if it is a nervy dog. Begin working with and training the dog. Set him up for success in his new family. 

You have kept your word to the girl, helped a dog. Keep in mind though, it is OK to change your mind about the dog, letting the girl know so she can make other arrangements.

In the end, this could be the next foster fail listed on the site


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

*Yes*



Twyla said:


> Foster the dog. Contact rescues for courtesy postings and screening of potential adopters.
> 
> With your experience, you will be able to see if this is lack of socialization or if it is a nervy dog. Begin working with and training the dog. Set him up for success in his new family.
> 
> ...


I totally could be a foster fail!


----------



## Nigel (Jul 10, 2012)

looks like you're comited, lol


----------



## Hineni7 (Nov 8, 2014)

I feel for you... Having lost 2 heart dogs (all my others were/are loved immensely, but those 2 devastated me, the most recent being 4yrs ago and I still feel his loss) I understand the hollowness that follows and the thought that you won't love another... BUT, the heart does heal and this boy might be what you need to begin the road back... I didn't know Sailor, but if he is like most heart dogs, all he would want is for you to be happy and whole. It would hurt him if he knew how much pain you are in, and I believe, if he thought for an instant that this dog who needs you could help you heal and be happy, he would want you to do it... This isn't to guilt you into anything, not by a long shot... Just an opportunity to think through the pain and maybe, just maybe, find another loyal friend who meets your needs and loves you as much as you do his and him... Just a thought


----------



## Emoore (Oct 9, 2002)

I say foster the Craigslist dog. 

After Cash died I went through a similar experience. Found a dog that looked great on paper but my heart was not ready. I made arrangements with a GSD rescue to take him in as part of the rescue with me as the foster home. I worked with him and trained him but never bonded with him. . . I could not forgive him for being alive when Cash was dead. In the end I fixed his bad habits and obedience trained him and found him a great home that loved him that he wouldn't have had otherwise. My heart just wasn't ready and he wasn't "mine."

When Cash died, my heart needed a puppy. I fostered a couple of rescue dogs but couldn't bond with any of them. But from the moment I saw Kopper as a puppy he was mine and I was his. I bonded with him immediately. Now, having lost Rocky yesterday, I already know he is going to send me a dog that needs a home when the time is right. 

Your heart just knows.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Thank you everyone. Those are some great responses. I will definitely consider fostering him and if I end up loving him he will be mine. If I don't love him, he will still be in better shape then before he was with me. And I can always find him a good family if it didn't work out. My question now is, do I have any obligation to disclose my potential rehoming of this dog to the girl that is giving him to me? I guess I am not sure if he even will be rehomed but still...


----------



## Stonevintage (Aug 26, 2014)

Hi Barbie I hope I'm hearing you correctly. If I have it wrong, please disregard my comments. 

I also lost my 14yr old GSD 7 mos ago. Many years ago, I lost my 13 yr old GSD - the hurt was so bad I waited 10 years before letting another into my life.

This time I did not wait. There is not a day that goes by that I do not send out special thoughts to my dog family that has passed. When I got my new pup, part of me never wanted to (stay safe, don't let that kind of pain happen again). But, there was a little part inside me that made me also look at the ads, just for fun, nothing serious.....I struggled with the decision of logic vs heart. listened to my heart and found it has many rooms...

Love is not instantaneous, it starts with a little spark and grows over time. How can you love a dog you do not know? Not wanting another dog in your life for preference or lifestyle reasons is one thing. Perhaps you have changed your priorities, people change. It just sounds like maybe you may be struggling with the same issues I was.

Dig deep, it's an important decision. But please, don't let your pain rule your decision or obligation to another....


----------



## onyx'girl (May 18, 2007)

I fostered after losing one of my seniors, while I researched breeders for my next puppy. It really helped to keep my mind occupied and ease the feeling of loss. I would have been a foster failure if the dog was ok with men, but he wasn't so I had to find him a home. He still wiggled his way into my heart and it was really hard on me when I had to let him go.


----------



## Syaoransbear (Sep 25, 2008)

I don't understand how your husband no longer leaving for training makes a difference if the animal was going to be with you for the rest of its life.

This dog doesn't need you. He needs a home that wants him as a family member, not a protection tool. Get a security system.


----------



## Stonevintage (Aug 26, 2014)

I know that I could never foster a dog. My heart would not allow it. I do however totally respect those who do. They are strong people and most cannot keep a dog on a long term basis or have dogs and they cannot adopt another.

I could never take a dog into my home (foster) and turn him away from what he thinks is his forever home because I wanted a puppy or one that I thought was better? Especially with the GSD breed....


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

*I'll explain*



Syaoransbear said:


> I don't understand how your husband no longer leaving for training makes a difference if the animal was going to be with you for the rest of its life.
> 
> This dog doesn't need you. He needs a home that wants him as a family member, not a protection tool. Get a security system.


It makes a huge difference. I would have gotten another dog eventually, regardless of my husbands job. But I was thinking maybe in a couple of years... Because of my husbands job that idea got expedited for lack of a better word. Like I said in my original post, I already have many other securities in place in my home. However, if I were to be left alone for weeks at a time, I will need a dog for security. So that I am not just stuck in my home. I can go out, I can walk, exercise, and my dog can be at my side. It is for protection. I was also hoping I could love it, but this is something maybe I would be ready to do later, not now. It was more the situation that was forcing me to do this sooner than I wanted. Regardless of whether I love the dog or not, I actually DO think it would benefit greatly from being with me. I understand he needs a family that wants him, but as he is now, it will be hard to find a family that wants a gsd that is pretty much feral, has been living in the yard his whole life and has no training or socialization, and lunges and tries to attack everyone that comes by. Do you see now that the dog could benefit from being with me whether for a little or forever? Me being a dog trainer, and having extensive experience and history training, rehabbing, rescuing, and volunteering for german shepherds?


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

*Thanks*



Stonevintage said:


> Hi Barbie I hope I'm hearing you correctly. If I have it wrong, please disregard my comments.
> 
> I also lost my 14yr old GSD 7 mos ago. Many years ago, I lost my 13 yr old GSD - the hurt was so bad I waited 10 years before letting another into my life.
> 
> ...


Thank you stone. I definitely am struggling with the loss,of my sailor. I feel like I lost my child. At the same time, no matter how much it hurt to lose him, I know there are other dogs out there who need my help. I'm not ready to move on at all, but maybe in sailors memory I can see if I will allow my heart to open to another dog. I have only met the dog once, and maybe once I bring him home, I can develope that little spark that you are talking about. Maybe he will grow on me? I hope so. I am sorry about your puppies, I guess we both know how hard that is. Thank you for your response.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

*Yes*



onyx'girl said:


> I fostered after losing one of my seniors, while I researched breeders for my next puppy. It really helped to keep my mind occupied and ease the feeling of loss. I would have been a foster failure if the dog was ok with men, but he wasn't so I had to find him a home. He still wiggled his way into my heart and it was really hard on me when I had to let him go.


I actually agree with what you did onyxd, I did something similiar. Since sailor passed, I have begun a dog boarding/training business (mostly gsd's) so that I can get off my butt and stop feeling depressed about him. Well I still do, but at least having dogs in my home gives me responsibilities, I have to get up, do things, and it also helps having furry little animals running around so the house doesn't feel so empty. Working with dogs on a daily basis has taken the edge off my pain, I don't know where I would be if I couldn't work with them. I never bond with them because they are not mine, but I do appreciate, respect, and care for them. I am hoping that because captain (the new dog) will be mine, that possibly I will bond with him...


----------



## Syaoransbear (Sep 25, 2008)

BARBIElovesSAILOR said:


> It makes a huge difference. I would have gotten another dog eventually, regardless of my husbands job. But I was thinking maybe in a couple of years... Because of my husbands job that idea got expedited for lack of a better word. Like I said in my original post, I already have many other securities in place in my home. However, if I were to be left alone for weeks at a time, I will need a dog for security. So that I am not just stuck in my home. I can go out, I can walk, exercise, and my dog can be at my side. It is for protection. I was also hoping I could love it, but this is something maybe I would be ready to do later, not now. It was more the situation that was forcing me to do this sooner than I wanted. Regardless of whether I love the dog or not, I actually DO think it would benefit greatly from being with me. I understand he needs a family that wants him, but as he is now, it will be hard to find a family that wants a gsd that is pretty much feral, has been living in the yard his whole life and has no training or socialization, and lunges and tries to attack everyone that comes by. Do you see now that the dog could benefit from being with me whether for a little or forever? Me being a dog trainer, and having extensive experience and history training, rehabbing, rescuing, and volunteering for german shepherds?


But it doesn't sound like you want to help it, it sounds like you want to back out or pass it on to a rescue.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

I see. It could be my post came off that way. What I mean is this: my heart does not accept or want the dog as it is. My mind says YES, take the dog, help it improve, and maybe you could love it and keep it forever but you have to give it a chance. If I don't bond, I will rehome it. So basically my answer to you is, I'm somewhat torn on the bonding with it, but not at all torn about my need to rescue him.


----------



## llombardo (Dec 11, 2011)

BARBIElovesSAILOR said:


> I see. It could be my post came off that way. What I mean is this: my heart does not accept or want the dog as it is. My mind says YES, take the dog, help it improve, and maybe you could love it and keep it forever but you have to give it a chance. If I don't bond, I will rehome it. So basically my answer to you is, I'm somewhat torn on the bonding with it, but not at all torn about my need to rescue him.


Sometimes we don't even know what we need. Worse case scenario the dog gets some training and a good home, whether it's with you or because of you in way or another. 

That saying "Who rescued who?" can be so true....


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Absolutely


----------



## Sabis mom (Mar 20, 2014)

I have spent the last two years looking for the perfect puppy.
I have two other dogs, and they are my lifeline, but I lost my soul 15 months ago.
Losing Sabi left a massive, gaping hole in my world. Part of me fears that I will never love another dog the way I loved her. I am almost afraid to bring a puppy home, because I fear I will not be able to bond the way I should. I know that I will love any dog, but part of me is afraid. 
Losing a special dog is a devastating and painful experience. We instinctively shy away from feeling that pain again. But consider this. The only way to have avoided the pain would be to have never had him at all, and he lived every minute to make you happy. Maybe this new dog is his gift to you.
Take a leap of faith. You might like where you land.


----------



## Debanneball (Aug 28, 2014)

Barbie, sounds like you talk yourself into and out of taking this dog. Lets weigh the pro's and con's..

PRO - save a life, security, already house trained, no biting, can go on your runs/long walks, won't be as demanding as a puppy, can be left alone inside and house won't be destroyed, etc etc

CON - untrained....

Think about this.. Where ever the mind goes, the heart follows.....doesn't stand a chance! 

Deb


----------



## DonnaKay (Jan 20, 2014)

I'm a big believer in fate. You did something you don't normally do...looked on CL and contacted this girl. Something led you to this dog. He may be in your life for a short time or he may stay with you longer. However long, there's a reason you were led to him. Go with it. Let whatever develops to develop. You may never know the reason why he entered your life, but he has something you need. Take him for what he is, not to replace what you lost but to enhance your life with another.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Yes donnakay, I think I will try that.


----------



## shepherdmom (Dec 24, 2011)

I'm going to be blunt. You will never have another dog that you love the way you did Sailor. It just won't happen. I've lost heart dogs and I've found other heart dogs and no two experiences has ever been the same. I've had many dogs that aren't heart dogs. Doesn't mean I don't love them just means that the super connection isn't there. That super connection is very rare and special and when you do find it again it won't be the same. It will be a different super connection. I think some people don't ever get to that super connection level so cherish the memories and move on. Hope you find it again someday but do not expect it to happen overnight or even in the next year or two. In the meantime help this dog because you know it is what Sailor would have wanted you to do.


----------



## Linda1270 (Sep 7, 2012)

I think you should take the chance, what's the worst that could happen; dog becomes more socialized, walks better on a leash? Then you find him a wonderful home with a family that will love him. You could be a foster failure and that would be great too. It's a win, win situation. You gave your word, you made a commitment to this girl and you should honor it. It will give her piece of mind to know that she found a great place for him to go.

He's a beautiful dog, the expression in his face, his eyes, say so much. How old is he, looks young in the photo?

Good luck with whatever you decide to do but I'm hoping you give him a chance.


----------



## middleofnowhere (Dec 20, 2000)

"I'm going to be blunt. You will never have another dog that you love the way you did Sailor. It just won't happen. "

This - my relationship/attachment to no two of the ten dogs I've had as an adult has been the same. 

As to whether or not you owe honesty to the person surrendering the dog to you - Yes! You do owe her honesty. That's only fair and it is the decent thing to do. If she disagrees with this, that is her right. So if you go into this with the intent of fostering and rehoming, be honest about it. If you are committed to the dog after meeting him, I'd be honest about that, too. I would offer to stay in touch with her in either case.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Oso is two years old. I am renaming him captain. When I saw him at her house I said I wanted to take him for a walk. She said they lost his leash. I was like okaaayy.... I said does he have a collar? No. They lost his collar. Okay.... so you don't walk him? Ever? No. Also his feet were muddy. I got itbout of her that he has been a yard dog for 2 years. Well he is 2 years old so that's his whole life... poor guy. His fur was matted. I scheduled a grooming for him the day after I bring him home. I definitely think thisbpoor guy deserves better and is a diamond in the rough. He has it all but hasn't been allowed to grow to his full potential. My intention is to allow him to reach his potential and keep him as my forever dog. I told my husband though two scenarios I would give him away. 1. He has no protective instinct whatsoever. 2. I don't bond with after say 6 months. If I do give him away (again not my intention) I wont be in a rush to do it. He will live comfortably with us until I find him the perfect family, do a home check, make sure they have experience, the whole 9. I hope I never have to do that though ! I hope to make a new post once I get Captain to keep you all updated on what he is like and his progress


----------



## Debanneball (Aug 28, 2014)

So glad to hear this. Sounds like he had a piss poor start to life. Who knows, Captain may just surprise the heck out of you. He will never be Sailor, just like Fritz will never be Stella. Good luck! When do you get him?


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

January 31st !! I would get him sooner but I'm taking my last clients through the end of the month (2 GSDs) and then I am taking a break from my job to dedicate to captain until ... well I'm not sure haha. Captain's progress will dictate how long I take off from work. There is a chance I might not go back to work again depending on my situation and his. Looking forward to see how things unfold.


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

Not to be rude or anything, but why would you get rid of a dog if he doesn't have protective instincts? That is what an alarm system is for..


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

That's my deal breaker. Always was and always will be. I got my last sailor to be a protection dog. He was a darn good one but I also fell in love with him sobit was morebthan that. Now sailor is gone and I need to fill that void of a protector/bodyguard/companion. Most people with gsd understand how gsd are normally the bodyguard type. Alerting you if they hear something, warning solicitors to never never come back haha u get my drift... that's one of the qualities that made me fall in love with gsd and it is what I value. For me personally, I have to have that quality. If they don't have it then why even get a gsd? Ill just get a poodle or a chihuahua or maybe no dog at all... again. Just my opinion. There are people out there who do not feel the need for a protective gsd and they and their family do just fine with a happy go lucky gsd that loves everyone and every stranger. I have placed a dog like this before with that kind of family. She was a foster of mine. Lovely girl, sweet, great companion dog, but not one protective bone in her body. She could never be my dog but she found a great family that didn't care about the protection.


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

I personally just think it is wrong to get rid of a dog if it doesn't have a 'protective' behavior. A dog is a dog, a animal that loves you more than it loves himself, and you should love him no matter what qualities he has protective or not. Just my opinion. /:


----------



## kelbonc (Aug 25, 2014)

Captain is a beautiful boy!! Looks like you have made up your mind. I always feel things happen for a reason. He definitely needs you and with time you may find you needed him.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Bella67: I feel that there is a family for every dog. The dog must be the right fit for the family. The family determines what that is. For my family, it always was a protective dog, and it always will be. We can deal with practically any issue. I wasn't worried about behaviors, lack of training, etc... but if he doesn't have a protective instinct then it is a no go. That is what we personally need for our family. Not every family out there needs that such as yours and that is your perogative. The ad on craigslist caught my eye solely because she said he was territorial and protective and tried to lunge at people on walks. That is the only reason I was interested . Read this carefully: when I saw her describe him that way I thought perfect! He is a diamond in the rough! I can train him, I can channel his outbursts into appropriate ways, he just needs someone to show when and where it is appropriate to act protective and to follow up withvoice commands. I coyld see him excelling at protection work or ipo. Something in that nature, as well as being a great indoor guard dog in addition to the other security measures I have in my home. If she would have never said in her had that he was protective I would have never contacted her. Ever. I wouldn't have even considered him. So if it turns out that she deceived me after several months of me having him then am I a bad person for realizing he is not the right fit for our family? Not at all. I can then move forward and find him a home that IS the right fit for him. I would never justvget rid.of him by dumping at a shelter. I have worked with rescues and helped to place many dogs and know how to do home checks and what to look for. Alas, none of this conversation may even matter because there is a good chance (if this girl is telling the truth) that he could be my forever dog. So then all of this is just water under the bridge. I hope this quells your curiosity.


----------



## Bridget (Apr 5, 2004)

Congratulations on your decision! I am getting in on this late, but I agree with the go-for-it folks. I know from your posts how your heart has hurt from losing Sailor. This may be just the thing! And, as previously said, if it isn't, this dog will still be much better off than before. It is obvious to me that if it doesn't work out you will use much care in placing him in a different home. I am happy for you, as I have a good feeling about this!


----------



## Bridget (Apr 5, 2004)

P.S. I get the protection thing. I don't depend only on my dog, but do hope that if need be, he/she would protect. That is part of my love for GSDs.


----------



## maxtmill (Dec 28, 2010)

Hello! Everyone is different in how they grieve. Some folks cannot bear to have another dog soon, others must get another dog as soon as possible to help fill the void after a loss. I lost my heart dog the first week of December. It was an unexpected devastating loss of my young 5 year old Chinese Crested Dog. My breeder waited for a time, then tentatively stated that another litter may be on the ground come spring. Although we did not plan to get any more dogs, after I thought about it, I cannot imagine life without a Chinese Crested Dog, so I MAY consider it in the spring. I have my new 8 month old GSD girl, whom I love to death. We need to be kind to ourselves and grieve and heal in our own time. If you foster this dog, you may fall in love again! If not, that is okay, too!


----------



## flyfisher22 (Feb 28, 2011)

BARBIElovesSAILOR said:


> Bella67: I feel that there is a family for every dog. The dog must be the right fit for the family. The family determines what that is. For my family, it always was a protective dog, and it always will be. We can deal with practically any issue. I wasn't worried about behaviors, lack of training, etc... but if he doesn't have a protective instinct then it is a no go. That is what we personally need for our family. Not every family out there needs that such as yours and that is your perogative. The ad on craigslist caught my eye solely because she said he was territorial and protective and tried to lunge at people on walks. That is the only reason I was interested . Read this carefully: when I saw her describe him that way I thought perfect! He is a diamond in the rough! I can train him, I can channel his outbursts into appropriate ways, he just needs someone to show when and where it is appropriate to act protective and to follow up withvoice commands. I coyld see him excelling at protection work or ipo. Something in that nature, as well as being a great indoor guard dog in addition to the other security measures I have in my home. If she would have never said in her had that he was protective I would have never contacted her. Ever. I wouldn't have even considered him. So if it turns out that she deceived me after several months of me having him then am I a bad person for realizing he is not the right fit for our family? Not at all. I can then move forward and find him a home that IS the right fit for him. I would never justvget rid.of him by dumping at a shelter. I have worked with rescues and helped to place many dogs and know how to do home checks and what to look for. Alas, none of this conversation may even matter because there is a good chance (if this girl is telling the truth) that he could be my forever dog. So then all of this is just water under the bridge. I hope this quells your curiosity.


I really hope the situation works out great for the two of you. Losing a dog that close to you can be tough to get over.

My thoughts, 95%+ of dogs lunging and barking are nervy and reactive not protective. I would never assume that because a dog lunges that it is protective and because it doesn't that it's not. You may very well have a dog that never lunges and/or barks because it is well balanced, able to read a situation and has appropriately never needed to display any type of protective action. In my opinion, you won't know if a dog will protect you unless you were truly in danger and the dog acted appropriately or the dog has been evaluated and tested by professionals.............

Cam


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Flyfisher/cam: this is something I have thought about as well. I tried to gauge if the protective behavior she described was really just excited behavior that she didn't know how to read because she has no experience with dogs. I told my husband my decision was to not get the dog because of that, because there is not really a way to know if he is protective.(I think really I was saying no because I was still hurt over sailor and looking for excuses) my husband told me there is no way to know if he is protective until we bring him home and give him some time. So I decided okay lets "test"him out. I do want a well balanced dog but I do want a dog that will alert bark if they see someone come across my lawn or someone ring the doorbell. I also want a dog that will bark if I'm out walking and someone creeps up on us. Hopefully I can train him on this. We will see how it goes haha.


----------



## middleofnowhere (Dec 20, 2000)

If you want a true PP dog, you will have to pay for extensive training and you will need to be 100% on top of it. 

Just barking or alerting - sometimes that comes naturally.

Some dogs will read a situation & handle it appropriately without training but I still would not call them protection dogs.


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

middleofnowhere said:


> If you want a true PP dog, you will have to pay for extensive training and you will need to be 100% on top of it.
> 
> Just barking or alerting - sometimes that comes naturally.
> 
> Some dogs will read a situation & handle it appropriately without training but I still would not call them protection dogs.


I 100% agree with you ^ 

Personally I think lunging at people during walks is not protective behavior _at all_, more like aggressive/over excited because of not being properly socialized.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

At first was interested because of behavior she described. Then when I met him I was like hmmm... maybe she just doesn't know how to read him. Maybe "aggressive behavior" is really just him being excited or just not knowing how to act because she never bothered to take him out for a walk? Regardless, I hope he has some kind of protective instinct I can build on becaise I do plan on enrolling him in those protection classes if I think his tempermant can handle it (after I've trained and socialized him). If he's just a super happy friendly go lucky dog that would wag his tail and lick someone who is robbing my house then like I said, wont be keeping him.


----------



## newlie (Feb 12, 2013)

I am not going to say what you should do, that's up to you. But I will say when my Max died, I knew I would get another dog but in my heart I thought I would never love the other dog the way I did him. It wasn't a matter that I thought my love would be different as it was I thought all that I would have left to give was some watered-down version of what I felt for Max. I got Newlie about a month after Max died and two years later, guess what? My love for Newlie is different because he is a different dog, but it is just as deep as the love I had for Max. The heart's capacity for love is infinite.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Funny that's exactly how I would describe my feelings. I feel like tgis dog would have a watered down version of what I had for sailor. I feel like sailor was my sidekick my better half. No way could another dog be like that. I feel like I would just do what I needed to keep the dog alive. Feed, water, shelter, training, socialization... but its hard for me to want to love it. I don't think I can do that. I need to wait until he comes home with me and try to let myself open my heart and try to just take it as it comes. I hope in time I can learn to love again.:-(


----------



## Lin (Jul 3, 2007)

People frequently misread behavior, especially if they don't know what they're doing. I've taken in multiple fosters where the owners reported xyz as the problems and reasons for rehoming the dog, and the actual problems were lmn. 

I don't think there is EVER anything wrong with fostering the dog (outside of not meeting the dogs needs, neglect, abuse, unsafe home etc). The current owner obviously cannot continue with the dog, and with known behavior issues being in a shelter is only going to make things worse. Just be up front with the owner that you may not be keeping the dog forever, but as a foster situation to rehabilitate and rehome. I've done this multiple times, and it brings me great joy. In those cases I was never looking for a dog, or even looking for foster dogs, but the situation came across and I took them in. Either get assistance with a rescue for placing the dog in a home when its time, or make sure you do it right with an application, home visit, and adoption contract. 

I lost my heart dog, who was also my service dog, last december. It still feels like yesterday. I know exactly what you mean about not being ready, and I wasn't ready for another dog in my care for the longest time. Now I am, and want to have a 2 dog household, but absolutely do not want to get another dog myself at this time. Thats complicated in my case by needing a new service dog (which is going to be 2 years till placed with me due to training) and not wanting a three dog household, but regardless I wouldn't be ready to own another dog. To care and train for another dog? No problem and I'm chomping at the bit, I just don't think my roommate is ready for a 2 dog household (I moved in here with just the 1) and I put moving on hold until warmer weather. Fostering is ideal for me. Never let anyone make you feel bad about the prospect of fostering and changing a dog's life. Its win win, regardless of if you actually bond with the dog and decide to keep it yourself. (I've had one foster failure, I thought it would never happen, but it was a kitten that was born to my foster momma cat nearly 2 years after I'd had my heart broken by losing my cats in close succession).


----------



## Magwart (Jul 8, 2012)

When a dog is rehomed, it often takes a _MINIMUM _of 3 weeks before they sentry bark at the front door when someone is outside. I see this in my foster dogs all the time. It takes a while before they see the house and people in it as theirs to protect. Please give the dog time.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Okay people. I took your advice and jist texted the girl and told her my intentions about keeping the dog but if he doesn't display behaviors I need I will foster until I can find a suitable family and how does she feel about this?


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

3week? I was planning on giving the dog a 6month probationary period haha. Don't worry the dog will have plenty of time with me regardless.


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

Is he a longhair? Looks like one in the picture.. do you have any others him?


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

He is a long hair smooth.coat? Haha. I only have pictures of him as a puppy. That one is the only good one I have of him as an adult. After I get him he has a grooming session scheduled THEN I'm going to take tons of pics and update you all


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

I love coaties, getting mine in March. :wub:


----------



## kelliewilson (Jan 1, 2015)

cant wait until you get him. every dog deserves a second chance and a smart owner,


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Congrats on your new dog bella. How old? Also, what made you decide to get them? Hope you post pics of yours too. I would love to see


----------



## Lin (Jul 3, 2007)

So you mean a long coat without the undercoat? Thats unusual, if so.


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

BARBIElovesSAILOR said:


> Congrats on your new dog bella. How old? Also, what made you decide to get them? Hope you post pics of yours too. I would love to see


He'll be 8 weeks! I am probably going to be naming him Jax or Brody haven't decided  And I just love love love long hairs, I've always wanted one I took a lot of time into the breeder & researching before making the decision though, so I am pretty happy.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

I guess i just don't know what to do with myself so I am writing here. Today is the day before Captain comes home. I have been cleaning, and preparing everything for his arrival. I had to go into the room where I keep Sailor's things and take his items we are going to re-use and clean them, get them ready for captain to use. We are not reusing all of sailor's things, but some things my husband and I agreed were expensive, and in perfectly good shape that they could be reused. Example, his travel bowl, his store and feed food stand, etc.. I thought I would be okay with it... Then I went in the room to grab them and am freaking. I am so sad, I feel so depressed, I feel like I'm betraying Sailor.mi don't know how to deal with it. I already cleaned everything and prepared it. It's done. But I feel like I'm panicking. I miss sailor, I just feel so much like those are HIS and I can't stand for another dog to use them. I don't even know this dog. Sailor was my whole world. I can hardly handle it. I'm really sad. Ugh. Husbands not home yet. I will talk to him about it when he gets home. Logically I know I just need to get over it, the items are in good condition and should be reused, but I feel like I can't breath. It was so hard touching Sailor's things. I feel like I desecrated the memorial I had set up for him in that room. :-( I just need to stop the hysteria, breath, try to relax. *sigh* I hope I wake up feeling happier tomorrow. It also doesn't helped I dreamt about Sailor passing away last night. Omg my life is so crazy right now.


----------



## SuperG (May 11, 2013)

Hey.....take a viewpoint of honoring Sailor in this reuse of items which mean so much to you.....and let the Captain know he has big paws to fill....I have my 'shrines" for my past dogs...I know what you mean...a picture ..their flat collar with tags and maybe a pawprint....everything else I "recycle" does make me think of the past and who used the items. I kind of believe the essence of the dog I have is because of the dogs I have had...never felt for a second I was selling any of my previous loves down the road....My departed dogs live today in the presence of the one whose stomach I rub...


SuperG


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Thank you. I will try.


----------



## JazzyLuv (Jan 20, 2012)

Its so funny I stumbled upon this post just now, as I have been feeling a bit down the last several days...Last month, just before Christmas we lost our beloved Mono, who I was very much bonded with and didnt think I would be ready for another furbaby anytime soon...Well the hubby was ready, he had wanted a couple of younger dogs since we had two seniors before...As much as I hurt, I agreed to adopt two GSDs, one barely two years, and another whos between 2 and 3...Its been a month since we have gotten them, and they have already bonded with the hubby, which I am totally fine with...I wont lie, Im not quite as attached...YET...and I do say YET, because like someone on here earlier said, it doesnt happen overnight, it takes time, and having grown up with several GSDs, each with their own personality and adventures, know that it truly does take time...Im open to that, and I know in time I am going to love these two with all of my heart...These two new "kids" also need training, which Im open for, in fact there is ALOT that needs to be done, and as scary as it is, Im alright with it...And while no dog is the same, and no dog with ever replace my Mono, I am happy to open my home and eventually my heart 100% to these furry sweethearts...Barbie, I know exactly how you feel with your Sailor, as for me there will NEVER be another Mono...I wish you the best of luck and I hope Captain finds a wonderful home with you...Newlie, you said it best, too...There is infinate room in one's heart for love... =)


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

Thank you Jazzy. I will be creating a new thread once I get Captain to let you all know how it goes.


----------



## Bella67 (Jun 22, 2014)

BARBIElovesSAILOR said:


> Thank you Jazzy. I will be creating a new thread once I get Captain to let you all know how it goes.


post lots of pictures!


----------



## newlie (Feb 12, 2013)

I look forward to seeing the pictures of Captain, too. And by the way, don't feel too bad if you need to put away certain things that belonged to Sailor for a while. I had a bin down stairs in the basement that had all Max's things in it and while it made no sense, I didn't want Newlie to have any of them at first. (I bought him his own toys.) But, as time goes by, I find myself more willing to let Newlie enjoy something Max loved. Part of it is time but the other part is the depth of the bond.


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

I don't think I ever want captain to touch sailor sings. I'm thinking about getting a display box of some kind I can permanently put his things in. So far I like captain and think things will turn out well. Him and sailor are very different though 

. Sailor was serious, protective, always guarding and surveying the house, noble, valiant, strong, loyal, faithful, he didn't care about trivial things like games or people or animals, his sole purpose in life was to protect me and the house. He took his job so seriously like an on duty security guard 24/7.

Captain is loving, cuddly, playful, and OCD about his toys and playing. Will play fetch and squeak his toy with so much obsession.he is happy, fun loving, intelligent, and ready to run and walk and do any activities. he is full of life and wants to experience it all.

Both good dogs, but so night and day!!

I am bonding somewhat with Captain but I would still take Sailor over any dog any day! I know it is too soon to tell but I think captain doesn't have a protective bone in his body. This is a deal breaker for me BUT, I have learned that maybe it isn't what I want, but it's what I need. With captain I can go out and do all sorts of things I could never do with sailor. Am I safe and protected? No, but that's why I need to learn Kung fu haha. But will I have a happy and social life with my happy and social dog? Yep. Maybe that is what has been missing...


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

http://youtu.be/rPS5zdzurys

Captain


----------



## BARBIElovesSAILOR (Aug 11, 2014)

http://youtu.be/W_5u9YPgHZo

The love of my life. #Sailor


----------



## newlie (Feb 12, 2013)

Yes, all dogs are different. Max was a yellow lab, a sweet, gentle giant who liked everyone and everyone liked him. There was no problem with other dogs and because he was older than Newlie when we got him, he was a much more settled, sedate dog and rarely even got really dirty. Then, talk about a difference, we got Newlie who roared in like a freight train! For the first year or so, I thought he had springs instead of legs. He was also sweet and liked people, but certainly was not gentle, or sedate. Rambunctious, full of beans, didn't care for other dogs and would just as soon roll in mud as look at it. It was quite an adjustment but I think as soon as I faced up to the fact that Newlie was never going to be Max, I started to love him for himself. And I don't love Max any less for loving Newlie, they are just two sides of the same coin.

Also, don't be too sure that Captain wouldn't protect you if you needed help. He may surprise you.


----------



## newlie (Feb 12, 2013)

Forgot to say, the little clips of the dogs were great, I enjoyed both of them.


----------

