# Tips on how to grieve the loss?



## 201837 (Sep 5, 2021)

(WARNING SENSITIVE)

Hi, everyone. My baby girl passed last night in my hands. It's killing this mama heart (Ive been dealing with fertility problems so she was like a child to me). We think one of 3 things killed her: hookworms (but i dewormed her after we first got her), parvo (she wouldn't eat or drink for 3 days so we force fed fluids in a bottle yesterday but while she would sleep all day she would groan like she was in pain and my plan was to get her to vet today before she was losing blood yesterday, the last hour and a half of her life she became very unresponsive and wouldnt move her eyes then proceded to make what I can best describe as motor running breathing sounds and i picked her up and as i did that her tongue stuck out and she breathed her last breath and went lifeless. third thing could be an injury (we brought to a lady last wednesday to groom her for us, she had a man there. She was a very energetic happy dog then thursday morning she woke up lethargic and began acting scared which was odd, but her ribs looked very wierd yesterday and when we would give her liquids it sounded like she had fluid in her lungs. I miss her so much and I've been crying/wailing since yesterday

yesterday I did let her out thinking some air would help and when i got back from church, i found her hiding under a tree and i had to grab her tail to pull her out bc i wasnt gonna let her die alone but i could tell she was in pain. she lost at least half her weight


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## wolfy dog (Aug 1, 2012)

OMG that is terrible. Hope you can have her undergo an autopsy to rule out abuse. Heal well.


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## 201837 (Sep 5, 2021)

wolfy dog said:


> OMG that is terrible. Hope you can have her undergo an autopsy to rule out abuse. Heal well.


We don’t have her anymore. Where we live it was best to dump her


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## LuvShepherds (May 27, 2012)

Dump her? What does that mean? I’m sorry for your loss.


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## 201837 (Sep 5, 2021)

LuvShepherds said:


> Dump her? What does that mean? I’m sorry for your loss.


We brought her in the woods on an old dirt road. We couldn’t really bury her in our yard and I know no option would have been good but we live in the country where we have to be careful


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## WNGD (Jan 15, 2005)

Why didn't you bury her in the woods?
Careful of what, who uses the word "dump her" for a loved dog?

Sorry if that sounds insensitive


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## Tank040415 (Jun 6, 2015)

I'm so sorry for your loss. Sounds as though she was young  I haven't had experience with hookworms or parvo so I can't help with what the cause might be. The only thing that I know that helps with the loss is time, and even then it will never fully go away.


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## Squidwardp (Oct 15, 2019)

First, I'm sorry for your loss. Hope no one employed by a groomer got abusive with her.

I will admit I don't quite understand the whole situation here. She lost about half her weight? Was she a young puppy?

Parvo can devastate a dog, but broadly speaking, the symptoms are like a terrible case of the flu in a human. Fever and chills, maybe, severe gastrointestinal distress, etc. Complete and utter lack of energy, like a bedridden human. Not many dogs survive it. But not trauma to the ribcage, I wouldn't think. So unless the ribs looked "weird" because the dog was severely dehydrated, I don't see parvo making the dog look as if it suffered rib trauma. Did she have a parvo vaccine?

Grieving the loss--never any good or easy way. You try to remember the good times, in time. Maybe if you're up for it, you think about another pet.
I am trying not to judge about the way you disposed of her in the end. Nonetheless, I will admit I did a little double take about the dumping her part. I've never just dumped a pet, even a rabbit or backyard koi. If you have well water or other sanitary reasons for not burying her in the yard, then I guess I understand. But my Dad impressed on me at a young age that a pet deserves what amounts to a funeral with some dignity. 
In the past we've had some really big dogs, Newfoundlands, which necessitated cremation, or at least that was the best solution.


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## 201837 (Sep 5, 2021)

WNGD said:


> Why didn't you bury her in the woods?
> Careful of what, who uses the word "dump her" for a loved dog?
> 
> Sorry if that sounds insensitive


I didn’t mean it to come off as me sounding as though I don’t care. I’m struggling to clean up after things and have been crying since yesterday afternoon when I realized it was probably too late to save her but I was gonna try anyway. I loved (still do) her with everything in me. She was like my child to me


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## wolfy dog (Aug 1, 2012)

For me, it's the wording of the action; "dumped" that is shocking to read. The following could have worded it like that but it wasn't. Our first dog had died (about 30+ years ago) at 11 years old, from kidney cancer. We lived in an area during a very cold heavy winter and in a neighborhood without the means to bury him. Also the ground was frozen to deep levels so it was impossible to get a shovel in there. At that time we never heard of pet cremation in that town. We didn't want to leave this cherished dog's body at the vet either. So, we drove to the mountains and placed (not dumped!!!) his body under a fallen tree where there was no snow, sheltered from the elements. It was dusk and snowy and when we carried him there, two deer were prancing in front of us. It felt like a natural burial. It was the best thing we could have done for him. Never felt that we dumped him. Leaving him was so tough. I don't want to think what possibly has happened to his body after we left. Maybe he gave a scavenger a meal for the night or for a few nights.


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## Sunflowers (Feb 17, 2012)

I’m so confused.
Could not have been Parvo. Parvo is dramatic and the dog is awfully ill and has bloody diarrhea that smells like rotting meat, so any owner would have known and been alarmed enough to take the dog to the vet.
Worms do not cause the symptoms described.
The previous posts show this to have been a healthy, bright eyed 6 month old pup.

Suffered terribly, was in evident pain, wasn’t taken to the vet, then dumped.

I just don’t understand.


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## WNGD (Jan 15, 2005)

Hlowrance said:


> I didn’t mean it to come off as me sounding as though I don’t care. I’m struggling to clean up after things and have been crying since yesterday afternoon when I realized it was probably too late to save her but I was gonna try anyway. I loved (still do) her with everything in me. She was like my child to me


For me, one of the best ways to properly grieve then, would be to dig her a proper grave and protect her body from predators. You might have to dig through the tears (I did) but you'll always know you did the right thing. You really haven't explained why you "dumped her" instead of giving her body some respect.


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## Sabis mom (Mar 20, 2014)

Tips on grieving? Time and process.
As to the rest it sounds like your dog was poisoned or ingested some form of toxin. 
Based on the symptoms you describe, she needed a vet urgently.


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## SMcN (Feb 12, 2021)

Have known more than one person who kept their departed pet in the freezer until the ground thawed. We have always buried on site cats, dogs AND horse (we live in the country as well, so am not sure what the problem with that is). With that said, letting nature happen by allowing the natural decomposition and feeding other organisms is not the worse thing you could have done. But Wolfy Dog's description of their funeral was much more sensitive.
I would be seriously concerned about what happened at the groomer as she went there a happy dog and next day was not only traumatized but very likely sustained an internal injury. My sincere condolences.


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## Saphire (Apr 1, 2005)

I’m so sorry this puppy died in pain and suffered to the end. I find it inexcusable to not provide vetting that would have most likely saved your pup, give to a rescue who could have provided vet care or euthanize to prevent suffering if you couldn’t afford it, you should have done something!!!
There is no excuse for “dumping” that poor pup in the woods, dig a hole at least gawd, this post is beyond upsetting.
Take the time to look back and see how you failed your puppy and Please don’t get another dog until you can care for it properly.


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## Sitz&Platz (Oct 20, 2012)

Did you ever take the dog to a vet after you got her? What I read was that you got a puppy, did not take her to the vet in all the months of owning her even though the dog lost half of her body weight, and you were force feeding her fluids. You left the dog alone outside while you were gone for hours knowing that the dog appeared to be in distress and very sick. Still no vet visit. Then you dragged her out from underneath a tree because you weren't gonna let her die by herself. She died and you "dumped" her in the woods. 

This is incredibly sad. For your dog that didn't have to die this way or maybe not at all. She was "like a child" for you, yet you failed your dog multiple times based on what you wrote in your post. I am beyond angry reading this.


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