# Quiet Baring of Teeth at My Son



## Artemis917 (Oct 17, 2013)

Lola is a normally mellow, gentle girl, especially considering she is only 1.5 years old.
We have had her at our home since she was 8 months old and got her from a family who had a grandson my son's age (currently a very mature 5.5 year old). She was the mellow one like her dad, with her mom and sister being much more "assertive" and driven. In all fairness, one weekend a month she still spends with them and comes home with some learned behavior I don't care for (I can tell when we're at the dog park and she's more dominant than usual).
I am careful not to let my son hang on her, etc...and he's good to her. Occasionally walking her on a short lead with pinch collar and she does well with him. He makes her sit while he feeds her breakfast and dinner. He takes her out of her crate when we get home, etc...But he doesn't have full command of her and that's probably not helping.
Anyway, I didn't realize this but he recently told me she bared her teeth at him quietly when he went to kiss her goodnight.
I knew she "knocked" him in the face/head a few times in the past when she didn't want him laying on her (not all his weight, don't worry!) or was getting too close to her face while petting her and I explained to him she can't communicate any other way to leave her alone, other than to walk away from him or "knock" him away.
But NOW he tells me a few times now she's bared her teeth a bit when she does it. This time I witnessed it myself and was mortified! 
She was laying down and he went to say goodnight. He came in and said she didn't knock him but lifter her head and bared her teeth quietly in a warning sort of way. Since I told him to back away and yell no! at her if she were to do that again he did just that.
We went back in there and I laid down next to her and watched. He sat behind her head and went to kiss her on the head and without lifting her head her upper lip curled up a little. I scolded her and she knew I was not happy with her. I made her lay there while he kissed her and I warned her not to do it again. I praised her and pet her while she patiently let him kiss her head and scratch her cheeks.
Anyway, NOT OKAY!!!!
What do I do?! I need to nip this behavior in the bud! Does this have ANYTHING to do with her age at all?!
:help:


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## katieliz (Mar 29, 2007)

i believe most dogs don't understand the concept of "kissing" and most shepherds (not all, but most), tolerate it but truthfully don't really like it. i think you dog is demonstrating remarkable restraint, but she is telling your son (and you), in no uncertain terms that she feels her space is being invaded. i would immediately stop the kissing behavior on your son's part, and all body contact between them, maybe i'd even tell him to (for a while) let her approach him when she wants his attention. then i'd be very vigilant and watch for ANY other signs of this behavior on her part. and don't blame her if she's not fond of the kissy/huggy attention, she's a shepherd. if she's aggressive to him under any other circumstances, that's a different story. but i do think she's demonstrating remarkable restraint and is giving out a definite message in the only polite way she knows.


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## katieliz (Mar 29, 2007)

i also feel that making her lay and tolerate behavior that she obviously doesn't like is not a good thing to do, and could be dangerous and/or set her up for failure. please be careful, and change your son's behavior until you find out more about what's going on.


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## boomer11 (Jun 9, 2013)

Artemis917 said:


> I scolded her and she knew I was not happy with her. I made her lay there while he kissed her and I warned her not to do it again.


this is a bite waiting to happen. if your dog is CLEARLY warning you she's uncomfortable then why force her? and you warned her? you realize she's not human right? does she show teeth to anyone else? make sure your son hasnt abused her in any way. is she sleeping and getting woken up? stop humanizing your dog before your son gets injured and your dog gets put to sleep.


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## boomer11 (Jun 9, 2013)

btw my dog also knows kiss but its taught as a trick. we point to either our cheek or lips and he leans forward and licks us there and then gets a treat. i wouldnt just stick my face in a dogs face and give kisses expecting it to know what the heck your doing. to a dog you are just invaded its personal space.


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## angryrainbow (Jul 1, 2012)

As far as the dog is concerned, your son is.. well.. a human. It is not like a sister/brother or mother/son relationship. She will not be hurt if he does not kiss her, and would welcome the space.

If you correct her and make her endure it, then that one time you aren't watching, she will bite. you are 'nagging' her. Kinda like the person who follows you around, tapping your shoulder to get yourr attention when you don't want to talk, then you whip around and knock their teeth out.

This is an accident waiting to happen. your dog does not feel comfortable with your son. This can be brief or she can grow out of it.. or it might be who she is. teach your son self control. he doesn't have to live in fear of her, but he should let her come to him. Forcing himself on her is just damaging their relationship that is obviously shaky from the start.


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## Arlene/Archer (Mar 7, 2013)

Artemis, Lola sounds like a lovely patient dog, pushed to endure behaviour she does not enjoy, and I would put a halt to it. 
When we were growing up our parents had a rule about the family dogs ( mostly working collies), leave them alone when eating and sleeping ( also in those days if the family dog bit or nipped you, my mother's first question would be 'what did you do to torment him?' And 99.9% of the time it would be us kids hanging out of him or ignoring signals like the one Lola is clearly giving- of course this was before we understood signals).
By laying beside Lola and 'warning' her not to give a signal, you're forcing her to act _without_ warning in the future. That means the next step up could be a bite. Dogs in general aren't one for the enforced kisses, as the other have said, if she comes to him for a lick, great, but hugging and kissing and all that jazz don't mean the same thing to a dog as they do to a human. It's great that your son feeds her and interacts with her, but he needs to also learn when to let her be, you both do, so that you can all have a long enjoyable stress free life together. Best of luck.


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## Safzola (Jan 14, 2013)

hi there and welcome.... its been a while since i was last on this forum interesting enough your the first post that got my attention. .......... our zola has the same problem but it is to all the family not just one person. she growls and bares teeth when she is settled on the floor and try to stroke her she hates it, sometimes she wants to be near us for a cuddle yet if you touch her or even speak to her she growls and runs away, so that she does not get told of i also have little ones only 2 year and 3 year old so you can see why we worry zola is a fantastic shepherd in every other way i myself dont no how to deal with this but was pleased to read the comments ...


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## Safzola (Jan 14, 2013)

Just one more thing though,,I would never ever force her to be stroked,,that is just plain silly....please be careful never to force her into anything she doesn`t want to do..........


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## MadLab (Jan 7, 2013)

Agree with what people have said. 

The dog doesn't see the interaction like the child does. The dog is warning the child that it's behavior is inappropriate. The dog sounds like a good dog. It is not his fault. It is just his nature. 

If the child acted like this with another dog it could get bitten. 

My own dog non gsd, is really good with children but still doesn't like to be hugged by a child or kissed. He will put up with it though, showing an uncomfortable facial expression. 

Trick is to show the child how to interact with the dog which respects the dogs nature. I tell children to rub the dog rather than hug it. 



> one weekend a month she still spends with them and comes home with some learned behavior I don't care for


If it's your dog then don't let people take it for a weekend when they feel like it. They will just spoil it and teach it things you don't want.

Generally you need to be the guiding force for your dog and learn about it's reactions and nature. Then be confident telling other people and children how to interact with it. Then the people,children and the dog will respect you more.


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## Mr.Nose (Apr 27, 2013)

My boy has been raised to be a cuddle dog. I grab him, lift him up, hug the living day lights out of him, lie down on the couch with him on my belly. He does not like being man-handled, whines, tries to escape. But never aggressive behavior. And after I let him get away, he comes back with a toy to play, because he knows daddy is in a playful mood. Only time he bares his teeth is when I am trying to clean the dried snot from his nose. Guess it hurts a little and he hates it. 

But honestly I do not see that as aggressive behavior, just a natural expression of "STOP IT!"

In so far your child is concerned, I would recommend you have the child stop doing kissing the dog or being too playful. Shepherds follow strength. My dog listens to me, not as much my wife. And your son is very young to establish his dominance. 

I would also recommend you have your son feed the dog, that will teach the dog to accept your son as a leader, and treat the dog like a dog. 

And yes, I found Cesar Milan videos on youtube to be quite helpful in establishing dominance. Maybe you can watch a few and learn a few tricks.


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## MadLab (Jan 7, 2013)

I don't think people need to establish dominance over a dog at all. It is important to develop a healthy respect for the dog.

When people show the dog they understand dog behavior then the dog will naturally respect them more. 

It is really important to encourage children to respect dogs as they are very vulnerable when around dogs.

Children do love dogs and want to hug and kiss them. (maybe this is encouraged, or is an instinct or is seen on tv with cartoon dogs) To a dog this is not affection but how dogs challenge each other and fight, so this is why they can get confused and back away from certain behaviors. 

If they can't back away they will growl or show teeth to warn the child that they are uncomfortable with the child s advances.


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## JanaeUlva (Feb 5, 2011)

Here is a good book to read that discusses how our dogs (canids) interpret our human (primate) behavior. Sometimes there is direct conflict.

The Other End of the Leash


"An applied animal behaviorist and dog trainer with more than twenty years experience, Dr. Patricia McConnell looks at humans as just another interesting species, and muses about why we behave the way we do around our dogs, how dogs might interpret our behavior, and how to interact with our dogs in ways that bring out the best in our four-legged friends."


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## JeanKBBMMMAAN (May 11, 2005)

That book is good - talks about primate v canine and is clear about the differences. 

Download Free Poster: "How Kids and Pets SHOULD NOT Interact"

More from her: drsophiayin.com/blog/entry/free-downloads-posters-handouts-and-more


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## Sunflowers (Feb 17, 2012)

I agree with the fact that the dog is clearly uncomfortable with what she perceives as having her space invaded.
The bigger issue, that I have not seen anyone mention, is that such a dog should not be in a house with little kids. Maybe others can manage this better, but not having eyes in the back of my head, I couldn't trust a dog like this in my house.
I don't think this can be trained out of a dog, and I would want a dog who likes kids and likes interacting with them.


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## Twyla (Sep 18, 2011)

Along with the poster above, this is a great website for families with dogs Family Paws-New parent classes dog and baby . By nature, most kids are affectionate, and sometimes that affectionate nature gets them in trouble with the dogs in their lives and a bite happens. 

On the Family Paws site, there are also links to trainers who can come in and help with further training and questions about the behavior you are seeing.


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## pets4life (Feb 22, 2011)

ive seen my dog do this to her good dobie friend when the dobie would get really annoying and start pestering my dog, she would curl her lip at her and if the dobie kept up she would get rolled. This is when they were young both around 1.5 years or so. After that they never had really any issues.


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## pets4life (Feb 22, 2011)

I noticed something my dog likes the vets and vet techs they never grab at her or push themselves onto her, or try to kiss her they stay back and ask her to come to them and she likes them, they stay laid back with her 


I noticed she never likes people who try to pet her or go up to her, she always likes my friends that dont really care for her like are indifferant to her and ignore her then for some odd reason she just warms up to them but to the people who "try" to be her friend for some reason she just doesnt like much. But if you ignore her she ignores you a bit pretends your not there then after a while starts to act like you exist.


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## Gretchen (Jan 20, 2011)

Some dogs do not like to be kissed and cuddled, mine is one of those. She doesn't show her teeth but quickly hops out of our smothering arms. You can keep your son involved with your dog by playing fetch and giving treats for commands if that's what you were doing. I would not let him walk your dog as she does not feel confident with him. My own dog would not let my adult daughter (the one who does not live with us) walk her. She got half way down the street with our GSD and my dog took the leash handle gently in her mouth and guided my daughter back home.

You've received some excellent resources here, but I'll add another one:

On Talking Terms With Dogs: Calming Signals: Turid Rugaas: 9781929242368: Amazon.com: Books

The author also has her own website you can search online.


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