# It was time



## Heartandsoul (Jan 5, 2012)

Yesterday late afternoon, my beautiful boy Sonny was euthanized. The cancer had spread throughout his body. New tumors were easily felt and before it sucked all the life out of him we made the call. 

I’ve been awake since 3am and don’t want to get up. I eventually will but I don’t want to. So I’m writing this instead.
Earlier in the day, I did tell him stories of his life and even laughed remembering with him but the story session was cut short. I don’t think he knew quite what to make of me. I was acting so out of character. I even did “this little piggy went to the market” with his toes and walked my fingers up his leg to the “wee wee wee all the way home” part like I use to when he was young. He got up to give my silliness more space.

Sonny is still with me, I just can’t feel him and that’s the killer. He always ran back to me if I fell or was in distress, didn’t matter what kind of stimulus he was running towards, he always cut mid-stride and ran back to me and smothered me with head rubs and kisses. Maybe he’s doing it now but I don’t know.

I wanted a buddy based on mutual respect and sometimes I goofed up but he knew my heart, and was forgiving, so very forgiving. The very first compliment ever given was when I took him for the just-got-a- pup vet exam. a woman in the waiting room commented “he has kind eyes”.

I loved looking into his eyes and he loved looking into mine. I think that was the magic of our relationship. He would always look away if upset until he calmed and his eyes softened. I think he just refused to focus on me during an angry state as a matter of respect. I learned from him and did the same.

Hey sweet man, it was a joy to have you as cooking supervisor/taste tester and I will always be grateful for the hundreds of out and about memories that we created together. Thank you for giving me your all when I asked it of you. I know you are free and collarless so enjoy. It was a better choice for you. Terrible cost but best for you. You became master of trade ups but when we swapped hearts I got the better deal. 

I love you so much.


God bless My daughter, she came yesterday to stay for a day or two. This was her doing that I was greeted with just now.


I









Long ago I promised myself that when it was time he would leave this world with his dignity intact.


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## Sabis mom (Mar 20, 2014)

I am so sorry. My heart is aching for you right now.
Peace my friend, sending you a big hug.
Run free sweet boy.


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## Orphan Heidi (Sep 21, 2018)

So very sorry.
"Remember the Good Times"


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## cagal (Sep 3, 2013)

I’m so sorry. RIP Sonny.


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## ksotto333 (Aug 3, 2011)

Oh my, I am so very sorry. Such a hole in our hearts when they leave us. Peace be with you for respecting him to let him go.


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## dogma13 (Mar 8, 2014)

R.I.P. Sonny.So very very sorry for your loss.


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## Squidwardp (Oct 15, 2019)

Very sorry for your loss, but happy for the good times you obviously got to share with him. I do believe you learn a lot about a dog by seeing their eyes and expression.
Your daughter's work very moving. Daughters are great. My youngest, now grown and moved out, found our previous GSD at a shelter.


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## banzai555 (Sep 2, 2019)

So sorry. What a great way to remember him though! Something popped up on my facebook feed the other day, a montage of photos of people's last moments with their pets, and I started bawling. Even thinking of Willow passing away makes me tear up...glad you were able to be with him though, and give him a peaceful passing.


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## Magwart (Jul 8, 2012)

I'm so very sorry!  

After my last one passed, I hung this on a wall:

"It came to me that every time I lose a dog, they take a piece of my heart with them, and every new dog who comes into my life gives me a piece of their heart. If I live long enough, all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are."


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## WNGD (Jan 15, 2005)

"Long ago I promised myself that when it was time he would leave this world with his dignity intact.

Thank you thank you thank you for doing the right thing at the right time on his terms. You'll see Sonny again.


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## Cassidy's Mom (Mar 30, 2003)

What a lovely tribute. I'm so sorry for the loss of your special boy.


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## wolfy dog (Aug 1, 2012)

So sorry. I know what this hurt feels like. I love your framed tribute. Will do this when my guys pass. Grieve and heal well.


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## Kathrynil (Dec 2, 2019)

I'm so sorry. What a beautiful tribute to a special friend. Rest in peace, Sonny.


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## Steve Strom (Oct 26, 2013)

I'm sorry Heartandsoul.


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## NiabiTheGreat (Jul 14, 2019)

I'm so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful tribute your daughter gave you. Rest In Peace, Sonny.


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## Supermode (Aug 18, 2008)

I lost my boy 3 months ago. Not long after he died he visited me in my dream.
I still "hear" him around my house from time to time.

Our dogs are just patiently waiting to see us again when our time comes. And when you go, you'll see a bunch of dogs playing, and one will look up and see you. It will be him and he'll come running to you.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

I'm so very sorry


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

Supermode said:


> I lost my boy 3 months ago. Not long after he died he visited me in my dream.
> I still "hear" him around my house from time to time.


Mine too. She came twice. The first time I knew in my dream she was visiting me and I was so happy. The second dream I was confused because I knew she was gone and didn't understand why she was here. I could feel her for months after she left.


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## Dunkirk (May 7, 2015)

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Sonny got to enjoy his last snow, what a great life he had with you. 😢


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## Heartandsoul (Jan 5, 2012)

Thank you for all the replies and stories. It helps a lot. It’s gut wrenching and hits in waves so I’m ok for a couple hrs until I’m triggered. And all of you willing to share precious moments with your special companion is really appreciated.

No one escapes this last price maybe that’s why they give us their heart, so we have the courage to get past the sorrow and enjoy the memories.


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## Sabis mom (Mar 20, 2014)

Look, I will be the crazy one. For years, yes years, after Sabs was gone I refused to remove the dog bed from beside my bed. If I moved it where would she sleep? When I moved to a new house I just put the bed back where it belonged. 
I had a complete meltdown in the middle of Walmart months after she was gone because I just did. No trigger, no problem, just because. I very carefully pick up the remaining clumps of her fur every Christmas and put them back in the Christmas bins.
Her collar and leash still hang by the door.
I still her her padding across the floor, I still see her laying in the sun, I still hear her snort when I walk into walls.
Do whatever you need for you.

"The most painful tears are not the ones that fall from your eyes and cover your face, they are the ones that fall from your heart and cover your soul."


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## jarn (Jul 18, 2007)

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's clear he was a wonderful boy.


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## NadDog24 (May 14, 2020)

My heart aches for you, he sure seemed like an amazing dog. Even a year after we lost Otto the schnauzer I can still hear him whining at the door asking to go out and chase critters off. Your daughter’s tribute is beautiful


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## David Winners (Apr 30, 2012)

I'm so sorry for your loss. Thank you for your bravery and selfless actions.


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## CatMan900 (May 24, 2018)

I am so sorry for your loss. I know that someday I too will have to make that call for my dog...

but your dog will always love you like you will always love him. Cherish the memories


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## tim_s_adams (Aug 9, 2017)

Sorry man! It's never easy! Healing just takes time.... I wish you good things, so there's that! Seriously heal in your own time. RIP Sonny...


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## GSDchoice (Jul 26, 2016)

What a beautiful arrangement by your daughter!
I agree...it's a good thing to let them go with dignity, before they are in constant pain or drugged out, not enjoying life, can't go potty themselves, etc...
it's what I would want.
You gave him a wonderful life and your love, there is nothing more a dog could ask.
Take care!


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## Arathorn II (Oct 7, 2017)

Sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


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## Jenny720 (Nov 21, 2014)

I’m so very sorry to hear about your boy. Your daughter did such a beautiful job in preserving some of his things. Grief hits in waves sometimes you are knocked to the ground but they will always be watching to make sure you stand back up. Sending big hugs!


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## GatorBytes (Jul 16, 2012)

Oh no, I am so so sorry. Forgive me if I am mistaken, but wasn't he to get surgery, but covid messed up things and then you discovered cancer? 

Beautiful homage you posted. And your daughter's shadow boxes. 

RIP beautiful Sonny


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## readaboutdogs (Jul 8, 2001)

I am so sorry for your loss of Sonny. Such a beautiful tribute to him and your love for him. Peace to you and your family. Rest in peace Sonny.


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## Heartandsoul (Jan 5, 2012)

@GatorBytes in a very abbreviated nutshell that’s what happened. The surgery was to have his hip replaced and the initial cancer was a Mast Cell Tumor that was removed and then a couple months later his whole body went haywire. Some day I will write of it. 

I was blessed with a great dog for me and am blessed to have this community to talk with.


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## Civiksi (May 18, 2020)

So sorry. The story made me sad then I saw what your daughter made. You have a good girl!


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## mkinttrim (Jul 3, 2011)




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## LuvShepherds (May 27, 2012)

I’m so sorry for your los. We have all been through it but nothing makes it easier.


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## Pfigs (Aug 11, 2020)

Hardest thing to do.... So very sorry for your loss.


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## Dethoziz (Oct 21, 2020)

Sorry for your loss.


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## Lexie’s mom (Oct 27, 2019)

I am so sorry for your loss! Your beautiful tribute brought tears to my eyes. It’s almost 2 years since I had to let Vinnie( Shar Pei)go after a battle with skin lymphoma and she was only 12.4y.o
Anyway, a while ago when I was on a shar pei forum for many years there was a guy there like a medium who started communicating with his dog after she died very young, I think she was 4 y.o , also from cancer. His stories of communication with her were unbelievable, that forum was closed a while ago because the owner who was also a rescue in Mexico could not afford to maintain it so I don’t have any links.
After Vinnie was PTS I really wished I could go back and find his contact info and possibly try to communicate with her and her mom that I had for 14 years...


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## gogo (Sep 7, 2008)

So very sorry on the loss of your beautiful boy Sonny my heart hurts for you hugs


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## Stevenzachsmom (Mar 3, 2008)

I am so sorry.


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## finn'smom (Oct 4, 2019)

So sorry for your loss! What beautiful tributes your daughter created.


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