# You haven't trained your dog very well



## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

Now, what would you say would elicit such a response from a person who is relatively a stranger? Would it be that I was out and about with Sasha and he witnessed her attack a little old lady? No...Would it be that he witnessed Sasha bark at every dog she sees? No....Would it be that when he sees me tell Sasha to sit she instead ignores me and goes and gets a drink? No...Those would all be reasonable reasons to assume that perhaps I have not trained Sasha well; however, none of those things are what caused me to be chastised by this young man.

There is a guy that is in one my classes that has decided that he must be near me every time he sees me. He is the kind of guy that girls would call "a creeper." However, he is in my group (and I am the group leader) so I feel I must tolerate his presence. So today I am on my laptop before classes start and he sees the pictures of Sasha rotating on my desktop, so he says to me, "Is that your dog?" I tell him she is, and he's like, "I bet you just love to cuddle her and kiss her." I found this to be an odd thing to say in general but trying to be a good sport I just kind of chucked and said, "Well Sasha doesn't really appreciate cuddling." At which point this guy looks at me and says, "Well you obviously haven't trained her very well." Now, I thought this was a joke, albeit and odd joke, but a joke none the less, so I just kind of chuckled and went back about my business, and this kid goes, "No, I'm being serious. From the moment you got her when she was a puppy, you should have cuddled her and kissed her, and MADE her like it. You are obviously not a good dog owner." At this point I shut my laptop and just gave him a *you've got to be freakin' kidding me right* look. But seeing that he was indeed serious I just said, "Well, I haven't had her since she was a puppy. I got her when she was two, and I don't really see the correlation between a dog liking to be cuddled and the dog being well trained." I figured this would end the conversation, but no...no I'd be wrong. "Well then whoever had her before you did a terrible job training her, because she should know better." At this point I'm starting to lose my patients. I have a very low stupid threshold and this guy was starting to push it (this coupled with all the other crap that he's said to me this semester.) "No, you're right. They didn't do a very good job training her. In fact, it is quite apparent that they didn't cuddle her at all, but rather decided to beat her. So, you know I don't really blame her for not wanting someone hanging around her neck or wallering all over her." Still not the end...still not the end.. "Well, you need to work on it with her." At this point I just rolled my eyes and walked away. What the heck gets into people sometimes?


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## Alexandria610 (Dec 2, 2010)

Let him hug her - see what happens


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

Why did you not respond with 

"I see your parents didn't train you very well. From the day you were born, you should have had a daily beating so that you knew the difference between being rude and being polite and also given a swirly once a week so that you knew when you sounded like an idiot so you would stop talking. Oh btw...You should read up on animal behavior because you don't have a clue. Nope...your parents didn't train you very well at all. They must not be very good children owners."


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## Alexandria610 (Dec 2, 2010)

Jax08 said:


> Why did you not respond with
> 
> "I see your parents didn't train you very well. From the day you were born, you should have had a daily beating so that you knew the difference between being rude and being polite and also given a swirly once a week so that you knew when you sounded like an idiot so you would stop talking. Oh btw...You should read up on animal behavior because you don't have a clue. Nope...your parents didn't train you very well at all. They must not be very good children owners."


Where's the 'like' button?


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## gsdraven (Jul 8, 2009)

Alexandria610 said:


> Where's the 'like' button?


:thumbup:


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

some people amaze me with how stupid they can be.


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom (Apr 24, 2011)

You sure he's not a stalker type ,your creep radar went off right? Dogs aren't the only ones w/ good instincts.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

Daisy&Lucky's Mom said:


> You sure he's not a stalker type ,your creep radar went off right? Dogs aren't the only ones w/ good instincts.


 
thats a great point too. If he's KNOWN as a creeper theres usually an excellent reason for it.


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## Alexandria610 (Dec 2, 2010)

Yeah...I took Alex to the local pet store yesterday to work on her sit/stay in a busy and distracting environment on her 30ft lead. While I had her sitting and staying, I started to walk to the end of the leash when I was encountered by a middle-aged woman. She looked at me funny then at the dog. "What are you doing with her? Why's she sitting over there and not right here? What's with that really long leash?" Really, lady? I tried to answer her simply, not knowing if she just hadn't heard me say 'sit' and 'stay' or if she really didn't understand. And when I'd finished explaining, she just rolled her eyes and told me "like that's going to be handy anywhere. Can she roll over? Can she do anything else? Why would you want your dog to be so far from you, anyway. That's stupid." 

I just kinda smiled, laughed it off and said "ok" and walked over to Alex (STILL in her sit/stay - so proud of her) and released her to heel next to me as I started working with her in another part of the store. Before leaving, the woman hollered out "she's not even a thoroughbred dog, I don't know what you're expecting!"

BAH...HAHAH. Thoroughbreds are horses, not dogs. I just burst out laughing at this woman's sheer stupidity and jealousy that my dog, regardless of it's breeding/ancestry, was doing things that I was asking it - and that she probably has about 20 dogs at home that don't listen to a thing she says and never will.

Fact is, people are stupid and seem to want to tell you exactly how to do/see things - even though about 99.9% of the time they are wrong and should keep their opinions that they believe to be facts to themselves.


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## Alexandria610 (Dec 2, 2010)

KZoppa said:


> thats a great point too. If he's KNOWN as a creeper theres usually an excellent reason for it.


Exactly. Sounds like a weirdo creeper that is just trying to start a conversation with you - but went about it the entirely wrong way.

College kids are strange ones.


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## Dooney's Mom (May 10, 2011)

alexandria610 said:


> where's the 'like' button?



love it


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

Pity him. The guy is trying to have a conversation with you and does not have a clue that what he is saying is offensive. I don't know if the guy is _stupid _so much as socially retarded. He is as disabled as a someone who is wheelchair bound, maybe moreso. I really hate it when people call people stupid. If they are indeed less intelligent then you are, rejoice that you have been gifted with intelligence. But ridicule them? That is kind of like a wealthy person going into a thrift shop and snatching a sweater away from a poor person. Allow them to make you angry? Unless they are deliberately trying to make you angry it simply does not make sense. "Stupid" is a descriptive term it is hard to see beyond.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

Alexandria610 said:


> Before leaving, the woman hollered out "she's not even *a thoroughbred dog*, I don't know what you're expecting!"



:rofl: Never seen THAT particular breed! Is that like a tall greyhound?


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

Alexandria610 said:


> Yeah...I took Alex to the local pet store yesterday to work on her sit/stay in a busy and distracting environment on her 30ft lead. While I had her sitting and staying, I started to walk to the end of the leash when I was encountered by a middle-aged woman. She looked at me funny then at the dog. "What are you doing with her? Why's she sitting over there and not right here? What's with that really long leash?" Really, lady? I tried to answer her simply, not knowing if she just hadn't heard me say 'sit' and 'stay' or if she really didn't understand. And when I'd finished explaining, she just rolled her eyes and told me "like that's going to be handy anywhere. Can she roll over? Can she do anything else? Why would you want your dog to be so far from you, anyway. That's stupid."
> 
> I just kinda smiled, laughed it off and said "ok" and walked over to Alex (STILL in her sit/stay - so proud of her) and released her to heel next to me as I started working with her in another part of the store. Before leaving, the woman hollered out "she's not even a thoroughbred dog, I don't know what you're expecting!"


Having her sit at a distance will come in handy when your kid gets thrown from a real horse and you have a choice of hold your dog or get to your kid. Sit! and go to your kid while your dog is sitting safely away from where the QH with Thoroughbred in him has his tail straight in the air and the whites of his eyes taking over the better part of his face. And THAT'S WHY LADY!


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## Gwenhwyfair (Jul 27, 2010)

Awww the guy probably has a crush on you from the sounds of it (that's a called a 'creeper' now a days??) Maybe he thought he could impress you, strike up a conversation and get your attention with his sensitive side (cuddling/kissing puppies) and/or knowledge of dogs. Alas, it backfired on him on him big time.... 





NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> Now, what would you say would elicit such a response from a person who is relatively a stranger? Would it be that I was out and about with Sasha and he witnessed her attack a little old lady? No...Would it be that he witnessed Sasha bark at every dog she sees? No....Would it be that when he sees me tell Sasha to sit she instead ignores me and goes and gets a drink? No...Those would all be reasonable reasons to assume that perhaps I have not trained Sasha well; however, none of those things are what caused me to be chastised by this young man.
> 
> There is a guy that is in one my classes that has decided that he must be near me every time he sees me. He is the kind of guy that girls would call "a creeper." However, he is in my group (and I am the group leader) so I feel I must tolerate his presence. <snipped>


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## Alexandria610 (Dec 2, 2010)

Jax08 said:


> :rofl: Never seen THAT particular breed! Is that like a tall greyhound?


 
Maybe....but what I didn't understand is how quickly her anger level escalated regarding me and my dog (especially when we weren't doing anything to disrupt her or anyone else in the store). People just...confuse me sometimes. When I hear people talking about clubs/college hangouts/alcohol/parties etc, I just kinda listen and have things I'd like to say, but know I would look like a fool since I don't know much about the subject (even though I'm a college kid). But..I just don't understand why people feel the need to try and give me advice regarding my dog, when I don't even ask for it? If I asked that'd be different, but, I didn't. Maybe it's because I look younger than I am and because I am sorta young.

OK! I shall stop hi-jacking the thread, I promise <3


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## Alexandria610 (Dec 2, 2010)

Gwenhwyfair said:


> Awww the guy probably has a crush on you from the sounds of it (that's a called a 'creeper' now a days??) Maybe he thought he could impress you, strike up a conversation and get your attention with his sensitive side (cuddling/kissing puppies) and/or knowledge of dogs. Alas, it backfired on him on him big time....


 
LOL that's exactly what I was thinking the whole time. Poor guy, haha. Epic fail. He was just waaaay in over his head with who he was dealing with


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

There was a guy in TSC that stopped, made a few comments and then as he was leaving rudely said "and you BETTER continue to behave" in a very nasty tone, all the while Jax had been sitting there looking at me. Go figure what goes through a persons mind at times.


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## Gwenhwyfair (Jul 27, 2010)

Yeah, poor guy!

Now that I'm beginning my 48th turn around the sun....looking back I feel more sympathetic for those young fellows who bumbled and stumbled because they had a crush on me in my college days. I think I could write one of those winsome country songs about it now! "The older I get the better I was!"  



Alexandria610 said:


> LOL that's exactly what I was thinking the whole time. Poor guy, haha. Epic fail. He was just waaaay in over his head with who he was dealing with


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## cowgirlup_22 (May 11, 2011)

He probably ate a bowl of stupid for breakfast. There is a guy like that where I live and he is a complete creeper and seems to be working on his stalker badge. I walk my dogs at least 3 times a day and on the days that he is out walking I make sure to take my male GSD,Kenai with me...He likes to hangout in front of one of the many bars on main st. One day when I had went to walk past him he asked if he could pet Kenai.I stopped and with a polite smile said I'm sorry but no.The guy got real nasty then and took a step towards me hollering about how I failed my dog because I didn't socialize him enough and he shouldn't be walked in public. I barely was able to say "Well I'm sorry you think that" before Kenai hackles up stepped in front of me,placing himself between me and the guy(he was right up tight against me).He didn't show his teeth but let out a deep scary sounding growl and the guy jumped back.I turned and started to walk away and the guy actually started following me all the while grumbling.Thankfully there was a cop waiting to pull off a side street right in front of me so Kenai and I jogged up to him. Creepy guy turned white as a ghost and went back into the bar..Ever since that incident he will follow me if I'm out walking the dogs.. There are just some weird people in this world...


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## cowgirlup_22 (May 11, 2011)

cowgirlup_22 said:


> He probably ate a bowl of stupid for breakfast. There is a guy like that where I live and he is a complete creeper and seems to be working on his stalker badge. I walk my dogs at least 3 times a day and on the days that he is out walking I make sure to take my male GSD,Kenai with me...He likes to hangout in front of one of the many bars on main st. One day when I had went to walk past him he asked if he could pet Kenai.I stopped and with a polite smile said I'm sorry but no.The guy got real nasty then and took a step towards me hollering about how I failed my dog because I didn't socialize him enough and he shouldn't be walked in public. I barely was able to say "Well I'm sorry you think that" before Kenai hackles up stepped in front of me,placing himself between me and the guy(he was right up tight against me).He didn't show his teeth but let out a deep scary sounding growl and the guy jumped back.I turned and started to walk away and the guy actually started following me all the while grumbling.Thankfully there was a cop waiting to pull off a side street right in front of me so Kenai and I jogged up to him. Creepy guy turned white as a ghost and went back into the bar..Ever since that incident he will follow me if I'm out walking the dogs.. There are just some weird people in this world...



Mmm after reading the comments on how he be crushing I feel bad for my must have ate a bowl of stupid for breakfast comment  I apologize if it offends anyone..


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

On a more serious note, this guy could be a high functioning autistic as well. There was a boy in my son's class who would come out with conversations like that and after reading your post again, it really sounds like a conversation that he would have.


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## nitemares (Dec 15, 2005)

Yes it could be and it couldn't be. but it's also unreasonable to expect everyone to think that every person could have some sort of social disability.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

nitemares said:


> Yes it could be and it couldn't be. but it's also unreasonable to expect everyone to think that every person could have some sort of social disability.



Wow...over exaggerate much? 

I never said anything like that, nor did anyone else on this thread.


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## Zuiun (Jul 1, 2011)

It's like a really bad pick up line:

"Hey baby! Would you like to cuddle my dog?"


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## wildo (Jul 27, 2006)

Zuiun said:


> It's like a really bad pick up line:
> 
> "Hey baby! Would you like to cuddle my dog?"


:rofl: I'd totally use that...


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## PaddyD (Jul 22, 2010)

Jax08 said:


> Why did you not respond with
> 
> "I see your parents didn't train you very well. From the day you were born, you should have had a daily beating so that you knew the difference between being rude and being polite and also given a swirly once a week so that you knew when you sounded like an idiot so you would stop talking. Oh btw...You should read up on animal behavior because you don't have a clue. Nope...your parents didn't train you very well at all. They must not be very good children owners."


If only we could think so quickly on our feet. Really hate it when I 
think of stuff like this on my way home in the car. My only response
would be get out of my face and mind your own effing beeswax.


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## nitemares (Dec 15, 2005)

Jax08 said:


> Wow...over exaggerate much?
> 
> I never said anything like that, nor did anyone else on this thread.


:blush: and thats not what i meant either, it was meant as a fact. sometimes things in my head don't come out right after typing them.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

i guess i'm just not as tolerant as other people. haha, i wasnt well socialized growing up. kept to my circle.


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## billsharp (May 3, 2011)

Dear Newbie:

Wakeupandsmellthecoffee! This guy is crushing on you big time, but has no game. "Cuddling" was on his mind (and not involving dogs!) so he blurted out a lame come-on, and you logically shot it down. He was left out on a limb. Instead of swallowing his pride and joking about it, he tried to carry out the bluff--and you nailed him again. I'm not defending his boorishness in any way, just explaining from a male perspective. 

You ladies have a little heart, ok?  Guys who aren't players get major tongue-tied when we're in college talking to a cute girl, and can say some mighty dumb things.

Abby


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## koda00 (Apr 27, 2009)

QUOTE=Alexandria610;2259229]Where's the 'like' button?[/QUOTE]


exactly! "like"


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## Jack's Dad (Jun 7, 2011)

90% sure he's saying about the dog what he would like from you. Creepy!


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## Sunstreaked (Oct 26, 2010)

We ignore our internal warning regarding someone at own peril sometimes. 

"He seemed like such a nice guy."

"He was such a quiet neighbor, never heard a peep."

"She was always going to church."

And yet, discovered in the house are bodies, or beaten and starved children, or abused animals. 

We have that "sense" for a reason. It's a survival instinct that is probably wired into our DNA. 

Sorry for the downer insert into the conversation here, but we need to pay attention when the "creep" alarm goes off, male or female.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

Sunstreaked said:


> We ignore our internal warning regarding someone at own peril sometimes.
> 
> "He seemed like such a nice guy."
> 
> ...


 
yup! agreed! own personal creeper alarms or this is a bad idea alarms for a reason!


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

Jax, my nephew is an aspie, and I worry, really worry about how he will ever find a girl friend. And that is what I was thinking when I read the original post. He would have no clue that the person he was talking to was totally offended or put off by what he was saying.


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

Alexandria610 said:


> Let him hug her - see what happens


I actually thought about making that offer lol! In Sasha's defense, she will let ME hug her, and she will cuddle with ME sometimes, but it's not her favorite thing. She'll do it if she can tell I'm really upset, but that's about it. I don't blame her. I'm not a very physically affectionate person, so I don't fault her for it one bit. I know she loves me 


Jax08 said:


> Why did you not respond with
> 
> "I see your parents didn't train you very well. From the day you were born, you should have had a daily beating so that you knew the difference between being rude and being polite and also given a swirly once a week so that you knew when you sounded like an idiot so you would stop talking. Oh btw...You should read up on animal behavior because you don't have a clue. Nope...your parents didn't train you very well at all. They must not be very good children owners."


HAHAHAHA!That made my day.



Daisy&Lucky's Mom said:


> You sure he's not a stalker type ,your creep radar went off right? Dogs aren't the only ones w/ good instincts.


Actually I had told my brother on a previous occasion that if I found out this guy had my address and just randomly showed up at my place I wouldn't be shocked. He's definitely not one that I'm giving any kind of personal information, and I mentioned today in our conversation that Sasha really didn't like men and has been known to act very unfriendly to men outside my family.


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

selzer said:


> Pity him. The guy is trying to have a conversation with you and does not have a clue that what he is saying is offensive. I don't know if the guy is _stupid _so much as socially retarded. He is as disabled as a someone who is wheelchair bound, maybe moreso. I really hate it when people call people stupid. If they are indeed less intelligent then you are, rejoice that you have been gifted with intelligence. But ridicule them? That is kind of like a wealthy person going into a thrift shop and snatching a sweater away from a poor person. Allow them to make you angry? Unless they are deliberately trying to make you angry it simply does not make sense. "Stupid" is a descriptive term it is hard to see beyond.


I would like to say that I don't mind people who are less intelligent than me. I don't usually describe those people as stupid. I usually use stupid to describe people just run their mouth because they like the sound of their own voice, think they know everything there is to know about everything, make the same mistake over and over because they refuse to take direction, these kinds of things. I am incredibly socially retarded. I don't enjoy social situations and cannot make small talk to save my life lol I don't pity this kid. He's old enough to know better. He pretty much talks over me every time we talk, he thinks that telling me what to do is a good idea, and now he tells me how to raise my dog, when he's informed me of how he raises his dog (He leaves it at his grandparents and goes and sees it once a week for cuddle time) and I'm not too impressed. 



Gwenhwyfair said:


> Awww the guy probably has a crush on you from the sounds of it (that's a called a 'creeper' now a days??) Maybe he thought he could impress you, strike up a conversation and get your attention with his sensitive side (cuddling/kissing puppies) and/or knowledge of dogs. Alas, it backfired on him on him big time....


He may very well have a crush on me (though if you could see the way I go dressed to school I would be surprised if you still thought that was possible lol!!!) and I have had guys have crushes on me before that I wasn't interested in because they were a little off...not the kind of off you can place, but just something about them doesn't seem right, this is the kind of guy that makes me nervous when I'm on a campus with 15,000+ students. Creeper.


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

Zuiun said:


> It's like a really bad pick up line:
> 
> "Hey baby! Would you like to cuddle my dog?"


HAHAAHA! That's so great! I wish I was a guy just so I could use that pick up line lol! 



Jax08 said:


> On a more serious note, this guy could be a high functioning autistic as well. There was a boy in my son's class who would come out with conversations like that and after reading your post again, it really sounds like a conversation that he would have.


He _could _be, but I kinda don't think so. I've been around autistic people from very low functioning, to very high functioning, and this guy didn't seem like that. Not sure how to describe how it seems different, but to me it isn't learning disability type awkwardness, it more like I'm a rude guy who has found someone to run my mouth at. 



billsharp said:


> Dear Newbie:
> 
> Wakeupandsmellthecoffee! This guy is crushing on you big time, but has no game. "Cuddling" was on his mind (and not involving dogs!) so he blurted out a lame come-on, and you logically shot it down. He was left out on a limb. Instead of swallowing his pride and joking about it, he tried to carry out the bluff--and you nailed him again. I'm not defending his boorishness in any way, just explaining from a male perspective.
> 
> ...


That's so funny. No I actually understand guys being awkward. My only long time boyfriend actually would say, "Hmm...what to say....." when we would laul into a silence in conversation. I generally find the guys who aren't smooth, and all "Oh yeah you know you want me" to be much more appealing. This is a kid who after many conversations, not all about dogs some about the actual class, has proven over and over that he is a creepy jerk lol I don't want to make it seem like I'm all, "Guys should know exactly the right things to say to girls they like all the time, and anyone else is a creeper" lol It's not that at all! I just tend to attract creepers by the hoards, it's my special gift apparently, so after many times of having it go right over my head, I've developed a creeperdar, and that baby was going off hardcore, and then he implied that my baby was anything less than the perfection I know her to be :nono:

I'm just kidding about Sasha being perfect btw lol


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

Sunstreaked said:


> We ignore our internal warning regarding someone at own peril sometimes.
> 
> "He seemed like such a nice guy."
> 
> ...


I totally agree, and you're right to say male or female. People don't think about girls being creepers so much, but I definitely know some women that I would call creepers, but they just don't get in as much trouble for making inappropriate comments most of the time. It's an unfair double standard.


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## WarrantsWifey (Dec 18, 2010)

Creepers, just plain CREEPY, and rude it seems.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

selzer said:


> Jax, my nephew is an aspie, and I worry, really worry about how he will ever find a girl friend. And that is what I was thinking when I read the original post. He would have no clue that the person he was talking to was totally offended or put off by what he was saying.


Asperberger's, right? I'm not sure if this is the case for the boy I know but it sure sounds exactly like a conversation you could have with him! He truly has no idea that you are ready to choke him. Nice boy, means no harm, genius level intelligence. I think the girl they meet will have to have an understanding of their disability. But I think those girls are out there.


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom (Apr 24, 2011)

Selzer did not mean to offend ;you and Jax both could be right but there is also alot of other things it could be . My concern is that he had several encounters w/ NewbieShepherd Girl which sounded kind of negative .I 've spent alot of time over the years asking women to pay attention to their instincts.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

You didn't offend me.  We were just theorizing that he COULD be, not that he is. It just sounds like a conversation you could have with the person that I know. And if he gives the OP a bad feeling then she needs to stay away from him. Autistic doesn't equal creepy so there is a whole other element going on here as well.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

No, no not offended. My nephew (Asperberger's) is also very gifted in intelligence, my cousin (autism), is I think learning disabled -- he would never make such a conversation, even about animals. He has always been one who does not like to be touched and rarely speaks. But for a variety of reasons, people do tend to say the oddest things when they are nervous. 

Once upon a time (I am socially retarded as well) I was at a Dairy Queen with some people from work, when up comes a guy I knew in high school, ok I had a huge crush on from high school. In front of God and everyone, I asked him, "How ya keeping yourself?" LOL -- that was probably 20 years ago, and my work-friend who was there with me, we still greet eachother with that.


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom (Apr 24, 2011)

Aspergers and autism are two disabilities that we hear about alot but unless you have a family member you dont realize the struggles they have and face.


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

selzer said:


> No, no not offended. My nephew (Asperberger's) is also very gifted in intelligence, my cousin (autism), is I think learning disabled -- he would never make such a conversation, even about animals. He has always been one who does not like to be touched and rarely speaks. But for a variety of reasons, people do tend to say the oddest things when they are nervous.
> 
> Once upon a time (I am socially retarded as well) I was at a Dairy Queen with some people from work, when up comes a guy I knew in high school, ok I had a huge crush on from high school. In front of God and everyone, I asked him, "*How ya keeping yourself?" * LOL -- that was probably 20 years ago, and my work-friend who was there with me, we still greet eachother with that.


Lol that's pretty funny! I don't have the best social skills (luckily my best friend is the most social person you'll ever meet, so she makes sure I don't become a hermit  ) and I usually don't initiate conversation with guys I like, but I'm pretty sure the last time I did I was like, "Hey, I think you're cute, we should go out Friday. I was thinkin' a movie" Talk about subtle :crazy:


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

Jax08 said:


> You didn't offend me.  We were just theorizing that he COULD be, not that he is. It just sounds like a conversation you could have with the person that I know. And if he gives the OP a bad feeling then she needs to stay away from him. Autistic doesn't equal creepy so there is a whole other element going on here as well.


That's kind of what I was thinking too, as far as autistic not equaling creepy. Rude doesn't equal creepy in my opinion either. There are lots of rude people out there, but I actually think most of them are less creepy because they generally aren't out to hide anything. One of the highly functioning autistic kids (he may have had Aspergers not 100% sure) was a kid I worked with at a daycare I worked at, and I would have to explain to him sometimes why what he said was rude. He really wasn't meaning to be rude, he was just stating a fact and it would hurt some other kid's feelings lol One of his big things was he was REALLY smart, and would tell someone that they weren't as smart as him. He didn't say it meanly, he just said it matter of factly, and it was probably true! Bless his heart, he got better as time went on, but you could tell it was just because he was trying to remember what to say and what not to say, not because he really understood why it was offensive.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> Lol that's pretty funny! I don't have the best social skills (luckily my best friend is the most social person you'll ever meet, so she makes sure I don't become a hermit  ) and I usually don't initiate conversation with guys I like, but I'm pretty sure the last time I did I was like, "Hey, I think you're cute, we should go out Friday. I was thinkin' a movie" Talk about subtle :crazy:


 
haha subtle.... not my thing at all. I was pretty outgoing in high school but if a guy knew i liked them.... i would literally be the girl diving into bathrooms to avoid them. Funny story about that from 7th grade actually. haha. I'm outspoken, obnoxious at times and downright blunt. I dont do subtle very well lol. i get flat out awkward sometimes. Diving into bathrooms helped avoid awkward situations and provided comic relief!


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

KZoppa said:


> haha subtle.... not my thing at all. I was pretty outgoing in high school but if a guy knew i liked them.... i would literally be the girl diving into bathrooms to avoid them. Funny story about that from 7th grade actually. haha. I'm outspoken, obnoxious at times and downright blunt. I dont do subtle very well lol. i get flat out awkward sometimes. Diving into bathrooms helped avoid awkward situations and provided comic relief!


Lol it's been my experience that being blunt works a lot better with guys than being subtle. They just don't tend to get subtle. My best friend is always like, "You need to wait for them to come to you; that's right way." and I agree with her. I really do, but I get much quicker results if I just make the first move. My theory has always been you don't know until you ask, and either way at least you know. And you know what I've found? Guys don't generally turn girls down. That just doesn't happen. I'm not a hussy or anything either, so it's not like they think they're getting something "fun" out of the date, but it's like you can almost see them speaking to themselves, "A girl likes me; this is good!" They're refreshingly simple. My cousin is always telling me about her and her girlfriend and I'm just like, "Oh...I could never do that." That's a lot of feelings, and hinting, and...well just a lot of estrogen lol When guys aren't being brutes, they're kind of enjoyable. What you see is generally what you get. With the good ones at least.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> Lol it's been my experience that being blunt works a lot better with guys than being subtle. They just don't tend to get subtle. My best friend is always like, "You need to wait for them to come to you; that's right way." and I agree with her. I really do, but I get much quicker results if I just make the first move. My theory has always been you don't know until you ask, and either way at least you know. And you know what I've found? Guys don't generally turn girls down. That just doesn't happen. I'm not a hussy or anything either, so it's not like they think they're getting something "fun" out of the date, but it's like you can almost see them speaking to themselves, "A girl likes me; this is good!" They're refreshingly simple. My cousin is always telling me about her and her girlfriend and I'm just like, "Oh...I could never do that." That's a lot of feelings, and hinting, and...well just a lot of estrogen lol When guys aren't being brutes, they're kind of enjoyable. What you see is generally what you get. With the good ones at least.


yup pretty much! I know once i was able to step out of my constantly running for cover shell, it was actually really freeing and telling guys flat out i was interested was a lot.... A LOT easier. I guess maybe my problem was always i was one of the guys instead of a girl. Kinda like that Katy Perry song One Of The Boys. Suddenly i wasnt just one of the boys anymore. Guys are fun. I was a big flirt. It was fun. Still is. But i'm married so i have to behave lol. But guys are definitely a lot easier to deal with than most females.


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

KZoppa said:


> yup pretty much! I know once i was able to step out of my constantly running for cover shell, it was actually really freeing and telling guys flat out i was interested was a lot.... A LOT easier. I guess maybe my problem was always i was one of the guys instead of a girl. Kinda like that Katy Perry song One Of The Boys. Suddenly i wasnt just one of the boys anymore. Guys are fun. I was a big flirt. It was fun. Still is. But i'm married so i have to behave lol. But guys are definitely a lot easier to deal with than most females.



That was a hard transition for me from being one of the guys to being the girl lol! All of the sudden all of these guys that I had been beating at football didn't want to play football with me but they were game to take me to the movies. At first I was like, "What the heck is this?!" lol!


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> That was a hard transition for me from being one of the guys to being the girl lol! All of the sudden all of these guys that I had been beating at football didn't want to play football with me but they were game to take me to the movies. At first I was like, "What the heck is this?!" lol!


 
lol, it was pretty easy for me. I could still be one of the guys but i was allowed to look like a girl too. never did actual dates though.... least not until i was actually dating someone already.


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## Jessiewessie99 (Mar 6, 2009)

Well thats an odd way to get a girl's attention. I certainly wouldn't go for it.

Oh my goodness, for me, when it comes to guys, I am a complete idiot. I say the dumbest things, and act dumb. Once I was at Starbucks with my friend, the Barista who took our order was super cute. They also had samples at the time. It was cookie samples, I knew it was cookies. But I was lost in translation and blurted out "What is that!?"(Really loud too) and the dude smiled and got all red.My friend just bursted out laughing, and I am standing there embarrassed! Another time I was in elementary school(6th grade) there was a cute janitor(yes, they exist!lol). He wasn't no old fart either, he was like 26, he was in college.Anywho, I was playing kickball with some friends in afterschool care.The hot janitor was right there. I kicked the ball and ran around the bases and as I got to third base I slipped and fell on my butt in mud in front of him!! I was in a skort!(Skirt/shorts) and had mud all over me! I was so embarrassed! I got up and ran to the bathroom!lol

I also tend to be a klutz around cute guys too. I have tripped myself in front of a bunch of cute shirtless guys at the beach, said dumb things. I am just glad I never farted in front of them. I have burped though.lol!

But yeah, I tend to attract creepers too. One guy really liked me. He asked me out and I said yes. We went out for 2 weeks. When I look back at it, I am like "What was I thinking?". I know its mean, and that looks shouldn't be everything, but oh well. He was kind of embarrassing. The school was about to go on Spring Break, so Easter was coming up. My bf at the time decided to get me a big pink Easter bunny. It was a sweet and thoughtful. But a big pink bunny? Thats little much.lol! But his looks and creepiness isn't why I broke up with him. I found out he was in trouble with the cops alot.


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## billsharp (May 3, 2011)

Interesting follow up comments Newbie. All kidding aside, you are perfectly justified in trusting your creeper radar. I have a daughter in college who has to use her creep-dar daily. 

Your story made me laugh, however, and reminded me of an episode of one of those "Bachelor" spin-offs on tv a few years ago called "Average Joe". The dorky guys were competing for the affections of the NFL cheerleader bachelorette, and (painfully) trying to converse with her. I recall one guy in particular who approached her and opened with "Do you like broccoli?" LMAO at that one.


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

billsharp said:


> Interesting follow up comments Newbie. All kidding aside, you are perfectly justified in trusting your creeper radar. I have a daughter in college who has to use her creep-dar daily.
> 
> Your story made me laugh, however, and reminded me of an episode of one of those "Bachelor" spin-offs on tv a few years ago called "Average Joe". The dorky guys were competing for the affections of the NFL cheerleader bachelorette, and (painfully) trying to converse with her. I recall one guy in particular who approached her and opened with "Do you like broccoli?" LMAO at that one.


That's pretty funny about the average Joe guy lol! I probably would have been too shocked to know what to say to that one, but then again first dates with me are sort of like going for a job interview. Funny story on that.

So since I have no idea how to have small talk with people, and since I believe only in dating for the purposes of finding someone to marry, I have a theory that I have stuck with. You know what are deal breakers, for my it would be someone who isn't a Christian, who is liberal politically, and who doesn't want/like kids. These are my big three. There are other things, personality wise that I don't care for, but I sort of evaluate those things on a case by case basis. The big three are things that I feel would make our marriage not work, and make raising kids together not work. So if they don't align with me on those 3 important things, why waste both of our times dating for years just to find out it's never going to go anywhere. Better to cut our losses early. So I bring up religion, politics, and family on the first date. Now, I had been critized quite heavily by some of my friends/family members for this practice. I believe their words were, "Why can't you just be normal?" So I decided to run an experiment. My friend was setting me up with one of his buddies and I decided I was going to try my hardest to be "normal". So I gathered "normal" first date topics from my critical family members/friends and went into the date trying really, really hard to be a normal person. We went to a movie and were waiting for the movie to start and I'm talking about what kind of movies I like, what kind of music I like, and other various "normal" first date topics. Then there was a commercial and there was some reference made to global warming, and the kid kind of made a disgusted sound and said to me, "Can you believe the liberals are still trying to push that stuff?" That was the closest to being in love I have ever been lol! He started asking me about my religious beliefs, my political beliefs, and started to tell me about his family, and how some day he hopes to have a really big family. I then got to proudly go home and tell my family/friends who doubted my dating style that I had found someone just as weird as me , to which they sighed and said, "Well for heavens sake hold onto him; he's the only one who can probably give you a run for your money." To this day I still talk to this guy and we still find that we have more in common than we have different. So sometimes being weird pays off, you can find someone who's just as weird as you are, and you can go off and be weird together lol!


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## LARHAGE (Jul 24, 2006)

NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> That's pretty funny about the average Joe guy lol! I probably would have been too shocked to know what to say to that one, but then again first dates with me are sort of like going for a job interview. Funny story on that.
> 
> So since I have no idea how to have small talk with people, and since I believe only in dating for the purposes of finding someone to marry, I have a theory that I have stuck with. You know what are deal breakers, for my it would be someone who isn't a Christian, who is liberal politically, and who doesn't want/like kids. These are my big three. There are other things, personality wise that I don't care for, but I sort of evaluate those things on a case by case basis. The big three are things that I feel would make our marriage not work, and make raising kids together not work. So if they don't align with me on those 3 important things, why waste both of our times dating for years just to find out it's never going to go anywhere. Better to cut our losses early. So I bring up religion, politics, and family on the first date. Now, I had been critized quite heavily by some of my friends/family members for this practice. I believe their words were, "Why can't you just be normal?" So I decided to run an experiment. My friend was setting me up with one of his buddies and I decided I was going to try my hardest to be "normal". So I gathered "normal" first date topics from my critical family members/friends and went into the date trying really, really hard to be a normal person. We went to a movie and were waiting for the movie to start and I'm talking about what kind of movies I like, what kind of music I like, and other various "normal" first date topics. Then there was a commercial and there was some reference made to global warming, and the kid kind of made a disgusted sound and said to me, "Can you believe the liberals are still trying to push that stuff?" That was the closest to being in love I have ever been lol! He started asking me about my religious beliefs, my political beliefs, and started to tell me about his family, and how some day he hopes to have a really big family. I then got to proudly go home and tell my family/friends who doubted my dating style that I had found someone just as weird as me , to which they sighed and said, "Well for heavens sake hold onto him; he's the only one who can probably give you a run for your money." To this day I still talk to this guy and we still find that we have more in common than we have different. So sometimes being weird pays off, you can find someone who's just as weird as you are, and you can go off and be weird together lol!


 

LOL!!!! Now you and me would be friends in real life!


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## billsharp (May 3, 2011)

Newbie, love the story about you and your friend. You're right--if you are the type of person who doesn't want to waste time on dates that don't have the potential to go anywhere, you shouldn't. (My wife and I were talking about our dating preferences and both agreed we were that type of person also.) You're not weird--you're mature. Stick to your guns and don't settle--he's out there, you just may spend a while searching through the haystack! (And kudos on your *conservative* leanings!)


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## PaddyD (Jul 22, 2010)

LARHAGE said:


> LOL!!!! Now you and me would be friends in real life!


Good thing this isn't real life :rofl::rofl::rofl:

But seriously folks, being blunt is the best way with guys, whether it is
negative blunt or positive blunt. Guys don't pick up subtle signs, signals, etc.
You have to hit us over the head with whatever is on your mind.
Probably more than once. :headbang::hammer:


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## Hunther's Dad (Mar 13, 2010)

Sunstreaked said:


> We ignore our internal warning regarding someone at own peril sometimes.
> 
> "He seemed like such a nice guy."
> 
> ...


Indeed. Read _The Gift Of Fear_ by Gavin DeBecker for more on this important subject.


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> So sometimes being weird pays off, you can find someone who's just as weird as you are, and you can go off and be weird together lol!


Well what the heck, I am weird, where is my weirdo?


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

LaRen616 said:


> Well what the heck, I am weird, where is my weirdo?


If you cross weird and weirdow, do you get 2*weird or do you get weird squared?


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## LaRen616 (Mar 4, 2010)

selzer said:


> If you cross weird and weirdow, do you get 2*weird or do you get weird squared?


Weir DoDo I believe, I am a DoDo.


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

PaddyD said:


> Good thing this isn't real life :rofl::rofl::rofl:
> 
> But seriously folks, being blunt is the best way with guys, whether it is
> negative blunt or positive blunt. Guys don't pick up subtle signs, signals, etc.
> ...


 
totally my husband right there. If i hint at something i literally will say what i want and then say Hint hint hint! lol


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## Gwenhwyfair (Jul 27, 2010)

Lookin' for a perfect fit in an off the rack world, when it's all just clothes.  




NewbieShepherdGirl said:


> That's pretty funny about the average Joe guy lol! I probably would have been too shocked to know what to say to that one, but then again first dates with me are sort of like going for a job interview. Funny story on that.
> 
> So since I have no idea how to have small talk with people, and since I believe only in dating for the purposes of finding someone to marry, I have a theory that I have stuck with. You know what are deal breakers, for my it would be someone who isn't a Christian, who is liberal politically, and who doesn't want/like kids. These are my big three. There are other things, personality wise that I don't care for, but I sort of evaluate those things on a case by case basis. The big three are things that I feel would make our marriage not work, and make raising kids together not work. So if they don't align with me on those 3 important things, why waste both of our times dating for years just to find out it's never going to go anywhere. Better to cut our losses early. So I bring up religion, politics, and family on the first date. Now, I had been critized quite heavily by some of my friends/family members for this practice. I believe their words were, "Why can't you just be normal?" So I decided to run an experiment. My friend was setting me up with one of his buddies and I decided I was going to try my hardest to be "normal". So I gathered "normal" first date topics from my critical family members/friends and went into the date trying really, really hard to be a normal person. We went to a movie and were waiting for the movie to start and I'm talking about what kind of movies I like, what kind of music I like, and other various "normal" first date topics. Then there was a commercial and there was some reference made to global warming, and the kid kind of made a disgusted sound and said to me, "Can you believe the liberals are still trying to push that stuff?" That was the closest to being in love I have ever been lol! He started asking me about my religious beliefs, my political beliefs, and started to tell me about his family, and how some day he hopes to have a really big family. I then got to proudly go home and tell my family/friends who doubted my dating style that I had found someone just as weird as me , to which they sighed and said, "Well for heavens sake hold onto him; he's the only one who can probably give you a run for your money." To this day I still talk to this guy and we still find that we have more in common than we have different. So sometimes being weird pays off, you can find someone who's just as weird as you are, and you can go off and be weird together lol!


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