# "If he were my dog"....vent



## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Our very close friend and neighbor totally ticked me off last night. And I got a little loud…we had them over for a cookout last night.
The husband kept telling us how unruly Mac was and how he should be trained to sit at our side at all times. And that we were not doing a good job with Mac because GSD’s are supposed to be highly trained and disciplined dogs… like the police dog his friend owns who can climb up and down ladders. And if Mac were his dog, he’d be able to snap his fingers and be in complete control of him. We could have forced Mac to sit at our feet all night with a simple come, lay down & stay…but why? He loves to run around, survey the perimeter of his territory, jump in his pool…and yeah he still likes to chase bugs. He’s still very much a puppy and we love it. In fact I was proud of Mac for occupying himself. If we didn’t have guests we’d be playing fetch or would have been down at the lake…. So if anyone was being tolerant of the situation it was Mac J 
And Bart used to bark at this guy when he came over but has since gotten over it with training (and because Bart is a resilient trusting soul). Yet, he kept pointing at Bart and saying that he did not trust him. And if Bart was his dog he would never be allowed to bark at anyone. Bart was laying on the ground between me & Mike the entire time. He wasn’t paying any attention to the neighbor…he was just chillin’ in the shade like a good boy. 
Finally I lost it….and went off and yelled “you had to rehome your ****zu because he bit people and marked your bed and you’re talking to me about my dogs?” He said it wasn’t his fault because little dogs have little brains but big dogs have big brains so they can be trained more easily.
I was thinking but did not say "little dogs aren't the only beings with little brains"...but I digress


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## Sunflowers (Feb 17, 2012)

Reminds me of people who can't control their kids, but readily criticize the parenting of others.


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## DharmasMom (Jul 4, 2010)

Wow. I don't think they would have been at my house very long. Sounds like your dogs were very well mannered and acted perfectly.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Sunflowers said:


> Reminds me of people who can't control their kids, but readily criticize the parenting of others.


Its funny you say that because they cannot control their kids either. They had to rehome the ****zu and their cocker spaniel runs out of their yard. Yet they expect our dog to stand at attention & salute.


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## doggiedad (Dec 2, 2007)

your neighbors comments about "if it were my dog"
is what he would do with his dogs. he's entitled
to do what he wants with his dogs. you can do
whatever you want with your dogs and you did.
why are you upset because he said what he would do
with his dogs even though he said "if your dogs was his he would do".
if your dogs were his he could do whatever with the dogs
because he owns them.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

DharmasMom said:


> Wow. I don't think they would have been at my house very long. Sounds like your dogs were very well mannered and acted perfectly.


Thanks for saying that. Yes they were very well behaved. And I thought the wife got that. She used to breed and show dogs years before she met the husband. She kept saying that Mac is all GSD and I took that as a compliment until she started telling me that I should be taking him to shows and competitions because that makes them happy.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

doggiedad said:


> your neighbors comments about "if it were my dog"
> is what he would do with his dogs. he's entitled
> to do what he wants with his dogs. you can do
> whatever you want with your dogs and you did.
> ...


Good point & question. He was not saying it in a conversational way.."like if I get a gsd, I'll do A,B & C" He was insulting our dogs...and us.


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## Whiteshepherds (Aug 21, 2010)

Mac's Mom said:


> Good point & question. He was not saying it in a conversational way.."like if I get a gsd, I'll do A,B & C" He was insulting our dogs...and us.


My BIL is the same way. I just smile when he starts in on our dogs and silently hope that one of them will pee on his foot. (no luck yet )


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## ~Saphira~ (Apr 25, 2012)

Mac's Mom said:


> I was thinking but did not say "little dogs aren't the only beings with little brains"...but I digress


I would've said it...


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Whiteshepherds said:


> My BIL is the same way. I just smile when he starts in on our dogs and silently hope that one of them will pee on his foot. (no luck yet )


ahaha  I silently hoped Mac would pop open a beer and squeeze some lime into it. LOL


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

I would have smiled big and said "Please don't ever get a large dog. Life could be very difficult when the dog is smarter than you."


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## Wetdog (May 23, 2001)

-------" "little dogs aren't the only beings with little brains"...but I digress"-------

LMAO!!!!!

Consider the source. 

They are the sort of people who consider dogs "things". They consider themselves to be the center of the universe---and dogs, along with everything else in the world are just things to be used, abused, kept or discarded at their whimsy. This attitude extends to everything, dogs, cats, possessions, lifestyle, community, other people, the environment, political views, just about anything and everything.

They consider themselves the anointed heirs and bearers of God's personal favor----and duty bound to inform and chastise the entire world of their position, and/or displeasure or disapproval.

You'll have more success trying to teach frog differential calculus than trying to get them to see or change their ways.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Jax08 said:


> I would have smiled big and said "Please don't ever get a large dog. Life could be very difficult when the dog is smarter than you."


See I'm not that quick but that would have been a good comeback.


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## Jax08 (Feb 13, 2009)

Mac's Mom said:


> little dogs have little brains but big dogs have big brains so they can be trained more easily.


ya know...by that logic...petite people would not be as intelligent as large people. Women would not be as intelligent as men. It has been shown that a man's brain is larger than a woman's brain but theirs shrink faster than ours. So at the time that their brain is fully developed, age 25, their hormones are at a peak so that subtracts IQ points putting them at a disadvantage and then their brain starts to shrink....and that is how your neighbor came to be....


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## 1sttimeforgsd (Jul 29, 2010)

Don't you wish that Mac would pee on command and you could tell him where to direct it. :blush:


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## DunRingill (Dec 28, 2007)

Mac's Mom said:


> "And if Mac were his dog"........


See that's where you cut him off and say loudly "But he's NOT your dog." and keep repeating that as often as needed until he gets the point. Stay calm, stay on course, keep repeating that phrase.


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## JakodaCD OA (May 14, 2000)

Jax good one)

I probably would have been quite irritated myself, and said something like "when you can show me your degree in dog behavior/training I'll certainly consider your advice, until then, I'm not interested"


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## KZoppa (Aug 14, 2010)

Carrie i'm sorry your neighbor is an idiot. wow. thats just.... ugh! Maltese are small dogs.... wicked smart little buggers too. Poms are smart. They're little dogs. I would have told him to get out because I was allergic to ignorance.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Thanks to each of you for your replies. I really appreciate it. These are good friends of ours so I guess it bothered me a lot more than if it were a stranger talking out of his you know what. My husband just ignored him because it was clear he was looking to argue. I enjoy debating topics especially if I learn something new...but I prefer to do it with people knowledgeable on the subject...thats why I'm a part of this community  Thanks again for the replies you guys.


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## Sunflowers (Feb 17, 2012)

Most dogs are smart. It is their owners who are stupid.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Ironically thats the point he was trying to make. haha


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## Daisy&Lucky's Mom (Apr 24, 2011)

I know doggiedad was right in saying ignore but if Mac couldnt pee on him or Bart maybe you could could have spilled a beer or shook up a soda. Im petty though!My husband's relatives make dumb comments like I would never have a dog like Daisy and i say Really she says the same thing about you.


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## mssandslinger (Sep 21, 2010)

how rude! i would have totally lost it


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## NewbieShepherdGirl (Jan 7, 2011)

Ugh people like that piss me off. My boyfriend (who by the way has made his life's goal to scare his cat and she's now very paranoid) makes comments about Sasha's behavior all the time. "I wouldn't let her do that." (Me: That's fine; she's not your dog, and she's sick so I'll handle this)"She needs to learn her place." (Me: She knows her place. Her place is at the top and don't forget it.)etc. etc. Sasha was going through heartworm treatments for all but a month or so of our relationship; you all know what a PITA a GSD who hasn't done anything for a week can be let alone one that hasn't done ANYTHING for 2 months is. She was bored out of her skull, and had sooooooo much energy that yeah, she was kind of a brat. Not terrible though, just not as good as she was before. He just texted me today and was like "How's Sasha? Is she getting more disciplined?" That is a direct freakin' quote. Sasha has very good manners. I have few things we work on because who amongst us couldn't stand to work on stuff, but really I couldn't ask for a better dog. 

The logical answer is just to blow people like that off, and it's not terribly hard to do with strangers, but with people you know it just rubs you the wrong way. Especially when they're just talking out their....well....a hole God didn't intend to be used for communication.


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## chelle (Feb 1, 2009)

JakodaCD OA said:


> Jax good one)
> 
> I probably would have been quite irritated myself, and said something like "when you can show me your degree in dog behavior/training I'll certainly consider your advice, until then, I'm not interested"


Yup, that's the way I think I'd go with it, too. 



Mac's Mom said:


> Thanks to each of you for your replies. I really appreciate it. These are good friends of ours so I guess it bothered me a lot more than if it were a stranger talking out of his you know what. My husband just ignored him because it was clear he was looking to argue. I enjoy debating topics especially if I learn something new...but I prefer to do it with people knowledgeable on the subject...thats why I'm a part of this community  Thanks again for the replies you guys.


I run into this fairly often. I don't know much, but I do know that I know more than the people I'm dealing with. Simply because I know those people and know they do no dog training, research, etc. So I win by default almost.  Yet, they have many ideas and toot some absolute nonsensical things at times. I've heard:

--All German Shepherds are natural born police dogs and don't require much training to make them so. It's in their genes and that is enough. I said, "You really think they are ALL suited for Schutzhund?" Reply I got: "What is that?" Yeah. 'nuff said. 

--My dog Bailey would definitely attack a stranger coming into the house. (this is comical.)

--I need to neuter Bailey immediately or he will definitely become extremely aggressive towards everything.

I could go on for maybe 10 pages. 

Sure makes it harder when it is someone you know spouting the garbage, huh?  I say the proof is in the pudding. Amazing enough, Bailey got his CGC recently. One of the "all-knowing" asked what that meant -- what had to be done to get it. I explained the tests. I was met with crickets. :rofl: I just KNOW they were thinking, would my dog do that? and knew darn well their dog wouldn't because it had never been trained in any of those things. 

FIRST time I shut 'em up with their vast repertoire of dog training knowledge. Very enjoyable.  Unfortunately, I couldn't bask in it too long before they were reminding me they have the absolute perfect dog. Funny, they've told me that *at least* 100 times. I've never said that about any of my dogs even once. In fact, these same people have never once complimented my dogs. 

Thanks for letting me rant!!!


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## codmaster (Aug 5, 2009)

Mac's Mom said:


> Our very close friend and neighbor totally ticked me off last night. And I got a little loud…we had them over for a cookout last night.
> The husband kept telling us how unruly Mac was and how he should be trained to sit at our side at all times. And that we were not doing a good job with Mac because GSD’s are supposed to be highly trained and disciplined dogs… like the police dog his friend owns who can climb up and down ladders. And if Mac were his dog, he’d be able to snap his fingers and be in complete control of him. We could have forced Mac to sit at our feet all night with a simple come, lay down & stay…but why? He loves to run around, survey the perimeter of his territory, jump in his pool…and yeah he still likes to chase bugs. He’s still very much a puppy and we love it. In fact I was proud of Mac for occupying himself. If we didn’t have guests we’d be playing fetch or would have been down at the lake…. So if anyone was being tolerant of the situation it was Mac J
> And Bart used to bark at this guy when he came over but has since gotten over it with training (and because Bart is a resilient trusting soul). Yet, he kept pointing at Bart and saying that he did not trust him. And if Bart was his dog he would never be allowed to bark at anyone. Bart was laying on the ground between me & Mike the entire time. He wasn’t paying any attention to the neighbor…he was just chillin’ in the shade like a good boy.
> Finally I lost it….and went off and yelled “you had to rehome your ****zu because he bit people and marked your bed and you’re talking to me about my dogs?” He said it wasn’t his fault because little dogs have little brains but big dogs have big brains so they can be trained more easily.
> I was thinking but did not say "little dogs aren't the only beings with little brains"...but I digress


 
Sounds to me like you held it in very well. But i do wish that I was there as it sounds pretty hilarious when you reached your limit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sounds also like a "real nice neighbor" - maybe your dog knew something when he used to bark at him!!!!


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

codmaster said:


> Sounds to me like you held it in very well. But i do wish that I was there as it sounds pretty hilarious when you reached your limit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Sounds also like a "real nice neighbor" - maybe your dog knew something when he used to bark at him!!!!


Its funny you say that because we firmly believe that Bart was reacting to his fear and not necessarily vice versa when he was barking at him. This guy is afraid of dogs and thats why he says they should be trained to sit at our feet.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

chelle said:


> Yup, that's the way I think I'd go with it, too.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I'm glad you got to rant  The wife told me that I should get Mac into Schutzhund. Afterall, if we weren't going to train him to rescue the least we could do was bite work. I was like ****...


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## GSDkid (Apr 19, 2011)

Why do you guys get all the fun?! lol. I love having these sort of debates. While I'm not too knowledgeable about training, I'd still love to debate. Atleast one person will walk away with a better understanding. 

You held up with your "nice neighbor" pretty well. Knowing me, I'd blow up in his face and raise my tone a few. lol. Maybe then I'd have to take classes on Human on Human aggression.


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## Chicagocanine (Aug 7, 2008)

If he thinks little dogs=little brains=not smart he's obviously never met a terrier!

P.s. Not trying to criticize, but just in case you want it not to be caught by the profanity filter, the breed is spelled Shih Tzu (and let me tell you Kindle autocorrect does not like the word Shih either.)


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Thanks for the replies. 

I actually tried to spin the conversation and told them how I saw a picture of a gsd strapped to a soldier jumping out of a plane ...so yes I agreed they are capable of amazing things...but again since we're not planning on enlisting in the armed forces we don't see a purpose in training Mac to do that either. 

I admit that I have not been the best trainer and Mac is pretty spoiled but we're all happy so its all good...right?


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

Yesterday afternoon a neighbor who stops by every couple months stopped over. The first thing he said "Mac still runs around in circles? He must have some kind of phobia"

I just went in the house but I started thinking about it. Maybe it is a problem. If Mac bugs my neighbors then they don't have to come over. But if Mac has an issue that I should be addressing thats another thing altogether.

He's 2-1/2 and still acts like a puppy in many ways. Yesterday we spent hours outside. We went for a walk, he ran laps, he swam and played fetch in the water for hours. When we got home he immediately started running around in circles. Then as soon as we got in the house he plopped down on the floor and fell asleep.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

I posted the question back when Mac was 8 months old and came to the conclusion it was normal and we should just make sure Mac gets plenty of exercise & mental stimulation.

http://www.germanshepherds.com/forum/general-information/140432-running-around-circles.html


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## Gharrissc (May 19, 2012)

It's probably not what he said,but in the way he said it. It could have been worded a completely different way.


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## Oskar der Drachen (Oct 28, 2011)

I've had a range of neighbors from the 
"calling animal control for playing frizbee in the park" ... 

...to the current set of "we are *so* happy with your dogs, we haven't seen ONE lurker since you moved in, you just let 'em bark".

It reminds me of another quote too.

"Nowt so queer as folks."

Ignorance IS fixable. You just keep on being who you are and he just *might* come around. If not, who cares?

Enjoy your pup  whatever his age!


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## middleofnowhere (Dec 20, 2000)

To the OP - subsequent to the initial post, you conceeded that this neighbor is afraid of dogs. I'd try to remember that the next time. Take a tact to help him over that maybe? Something like "If/Since he makes you uncomfortable, we put him up." Or explore it further "You seem worried about him. How is that for you?"

Few friendships are perfect, good friends often get under our skin and it is harder to handle than someone that you can simply pop off at. 

I think I understand how you feel but figuring out why you react so strongly and why he won't leave it (the neighbor, not your dog!) will probably help a lot more than finding a witty way to shut him down. (I know those provide instant gratification but they really don't offer a long range help.) Even an honest "Hey Buddy, We heard you. Could you back off now?" would probably do a lot to make you feel better AND maintain the friendship.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

Why do people say the things they do?

Why do people feel free to say whatever they want about your dog? The only answer to that question that makes any sense at all to me, is that they have never had a relationship with their dog that was so special that they take it as personal criticism when someone says something negative about them. In fact it is worse, people can say something about me, even something personal, and I won't be nearly as upset as when someone says something about my dogs -- thems fightin' words!

But it is a really special relationship when you care for a critter deeply. And if you have, you really cannot blatantly attack someone else's without realizing how that is likely to be taken. 

So, my advice is to shake your head and agree with your neighbor. Yes, we know, he needs to be trained better. And feel deep pity for your neighbor/friend, because he is totally clueless at how much he lacks.

Remember, the best way to shut someone up is to agree with them. It can stop them cold. 

But if he moves to demonstrate training techniques on your dog, move faster than greased lightning and tell him that is your job, thank you very much.


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## LuvShepherds (May 27, 2012)

I have friends I can talk to about dogs any time, in any context and never once disagree. I have other friends where "dogs" is a 4 letter word. We can't even have the most basic discussion about dogs, breed, or training without a disagreement. So, I either don't see them or I don't talk about dogs. If they bring it up, I try to say something pleasant about their dogs and then change the subject. They don't like GSDs, they don't like rescues or fosters, and they don't like professional breeders. Every dog they have owned has either been from a back yard breeder, a pet store or a stray they've taken in on their own. They don't believe in training, they let their dogs jump on guests. They don't believe in dog sports, obedience or anything else that sounds like training. Although lately they have hired a private trainer to help them walk their dogs on a leash. Of course, they use the only type of equipment that I would never use and they don't like the hardware I use. The only thing we can agree on is that we love our dogs and they love theirs.


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## selzer (May 7, 2005)

LuvShepherds said:


> I have friends I can talk to about dogs any time, in any context and never once disagree. I have other friends where "dogs" is a 4 letter word. We can't even have the most basic discussion about dogs, breed, or training without a disagreement. So, I either don't see them or I don't talk about dogs. If they bring it up, I try to say something pleasant about their dogs and then change the subject. They don't like GSDs, they don't like rescues or fosters, and they don't like professional breeders. Every dog they have owned has either been from a back yard breeder, a pet store or a stray they've taken in on their own. They don't believe in training, they let their dogs jump on guests. They don't believe in dog sports, obedience or anything else that sounds like training. Although lately they have hired a private trainer to help them walk their dogs on a leash. Of course, they use the only type of equipment that I would never use and they don't like the hardware I use. The only thing we can agree on is that we love our dogs and they love theirs.


Good point. 

For me, most of my friends are dog-people, or at least they are not anti-dog. But, there is a limit to how much an ordinary friend can take that has to do with dogs. I try (I DO, REALLY I DO) to limit the amount I say to most people about my dogs, whether they are family, friends without dogs, or even friends with dogs. I keep my hard-core dog communications to a few very trusted friends, and these forums, where people are likely to be just as crazy as I am about dogs if not moreso. Everyone else, I pretty much try to wait until they ask me, and then I _try _to keep it short. And I do not force my dogs on my family or friends. If they come over to my house, the dogs are kenneled or baby gated in their areas. If you have one or two dogs, it's a little different. And if it is Dad, I will leave Babs out. If there is any question at all about someone being uncomfortable, I just contain the dogs. Yes, they live there, but it won't hurt them to be put up once in a while.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

I didn't notice there were more replies on this thread until the other day. Thanks to you all. There have been a lot of good points made and as always support from people who get it.


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## Mac's Mom (Jun 7, 2010)

selzer said:


> Why do people say the things they do?
> 
> Why do people feel free to say whatever they want about your dog? The only answer to that question that makes any sense at all to me, is that they have never had a relationship with their dog that was so special that they take it as personal criticism when someone says something negative about them. I agree. In fact it is worse, people can say something about me, even something personal, and I won't be nearly as upset as when someone says something about my dogs -- thems fightin' words! No doubt about it! I love these boys more than anything and they are good dogs.
> 
> ...


My replies are in Purple. The last part, we've actually done mutliple times when this neighbor was over to make him understand that Mac is trained...by us on our terms.

PS I hope I don't have too many typos. I'm outside on my laptop and the sun is glaring. The boys are messing around in the yard. They will be at my feet when they are tired


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