# Couples that train together?



## mycobraracr (Dec 4, 2011)

I am just curious as to how many of you train with your SO? 

Does it ever cause issues in the relationship? 

Do you help eachother on the training feild or at home? 

Over the last few months, my GF has gotten really into schH and sda. I am loving the fact that she loves it so much and she is picking up really fast! We train at home and anywhere we have the dogs and for the most part it is nice to always have a second set of eyes around to see things that I can't/don't while working my dog and vise versa. 

I have noticed though, if I'm having a bad session and getting frustrated, if she tells me to do it a different way it just makes me more irritated. Especially if she's right! Which is most of the time haha. Any way I'm losing my train of thought so... Just thought it would be interesting to hear how some of you train with your SO.


----------



## kiya (May 3, 2010)

mycobraracr said:


> I have noticed though, if I'm having a bad session and getting frustrated, *if she tells me to do it a different way it just makes me more irritated*. Especially if she's right! Which is most of the time haha. Any way I'm losing my train of thought so... Just thought it would be interesting to hear how some of you train with your SO.


That must be a guy thing! 
Train, ha I can't even walk the dogs with my husband.


----------



## Gretchen (Jan 20, 2011)

My daughter and I train together. No issues at the training facility, but sometimes on our walks, she will say, " I do that differently" or "Molly does not do that with me". Yes it can be irritating, I just keep my mouth shut and think about it, as should could be right. My husband knows I'm always right when it come to the dog (haha), but we don't train together.


----------



## wolfy dog (Aug 1, 2012)

That would ruin WD in one session..... His "consistency" depends on the weather.


----------



## gsdraven (Jul 8, 2009)

My husband and I train together. It's actually how we met. Although admittedly, he takes constructive advice much better than I do


----------



## lhczth (Apr 5, 2000)

I have trained with a few couples that work extremely well together. Horst and Michaella Knoche (Javir's people) are like watching a well oiled machine. MOST of the time, though, couples training together often means a lot of tension. It can work, but it really requires a super strong relationship of respect and two people with the same goals or it means they train separately with other people.


----------



## hunterisgreat (Jan 30, 2011)

I can't find a woman who can accept I have 3 dogs + a foster :-/


----------



## TrickyShepherd (Aug 15, 2011)

I wish my SO would get into training. He loves the dogs... but more of the pet side of owning them. In fact, he really never asks them to do anything. lol!

Though, I do feel like if we did train together... we may end up just arguing over it all. 

We already argue about who's dog is better behaved. lol.


----------



## FG167 (Sep 22, 2010)

We train together, and work together.


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## Liesje (Mar 4, 2007)

Um, I train with them ^  (or used to, *sniff*)

My husband used to come to my SchH training and even tried helper work, but he just isn't very good at reading dogs, timing rewards/corrections, etc. It doesn't interest him and he has very little do do with my dogs/puppies (he won't even feed them or let them out unless I ask, which is fine). He did a few beginner type classes with his/our mutt pet Coke and I went along and probably ended up taking over.


----------



## Verivus (Nov 7, 2010)

I wish I could find a guy who is as interested as I am in dogs...


----------



## Tim Connell (Nov 19, 2010)

A dog person usually has difficulty dealing with a non-dog person, since they "just don't get it". The key is finding someone as dog crazy as you are. We are a team, and whether it is training, or daily dog exercise and care duties, that's the only way it would operate smoothly.

People outside the dog world don't understand that working your dogs is enjoyable. Some people enjoy playing tennis, knitting, or tiddlywinks...we like working dogs. 


We train together constantly. (OB, bitework, and tracking). The key is always having a plan, and that alleviates any communication difficulties in the midst of a training session.


We find that we video a lot of our training, and that can go a long way toward showing the other person what happened during a session, and avoiding any sort of communication breakdown.


----------



## elisabeth_00117 (May 17, 2009)

No SO here, so I drag my best friend all over with me - but she does the same to me so it works. 

It's hard to find a guy who; a.) likes dogs, b.) likes German Shepherds c.) can understand my obsession with them and the sport... 

Yeah... probably going to be single for awhile... LOL.

Last date I had RAN down the hallway and waited for me when I opened my door and my 2 GSD's were in a down just behind the threshold staring at him... lol. I got a bad headache not much later and had to go home.... LOL.


----------



## lhczth (Apr 5, 2000)

My husband married a horse crazy woman that also had dogs. He was raised with farm dogs that never came in the house. He loved the dogs, but had no interest in training. He never saw me trial and only attended training once. His job took him away a lot so my training rarely interfered with our time together plus he had his own hobbies. 

I wish I could find another one like him.


----------



## onyx'girl (May 18, 2007)

What I see at training, most teams are women dominated. Seldom are there more guys than women training in a club. 
And those guys are recruited to be helper/decoys! 
Just like the horse world, it seems women are more into competing. Maybe because there are no engines to tune or blame? LOL
My DH has no interest in dog sport, he enjoys listening to me talk about our training days, or progress and understands whats going on, but to handle his own dog and compete...no. He's into fuel powered sports/runs a machine shop for race cars.


----------



## Wolfgeist (Dec 4, 2010)

My husband isn't really big on dog training right now, but is considering getting into it with me.

Liz (elisabeth_00117) is my other significant other.. LOL. We train together and help each other figure stuff out on a regular basis.. it's great! I couldn't imagine having no one to train with, and it's nice to have someone you hang out with on a regular basis around to help spot for you in training.


----------



## phgsd (Jun 6, 2004)

My husband doesn't "train" per se - he did take Kessy herding for a while last year, when I wasn't able. Unfortunately she did not exactly behave herself, in the graze she was fine but moving the flock wasn't pretty. So that lasted about 3-4 lessons...LOL 

He always comes to trials and shows and anything dog-related...whether it's 6 hours or 20 minutes away. He feeds the dogs about half the time, and he lets them out if he's home and I'm not. He's also processed many deer, sheep, etc to feed to the dogs. I don't think I could ask for much more! :wub: 

He often comes out for my herding lessons - he takes pics, videos, just enjoys being out there. He will do some helper work for me in the backyard, he knows the basics. 

If he wanted to train a dog of his own, that'd be fine with me, but he just likes to watch and be supportive.

Sorry ladies, he's MINE!


----------



## Verivus (Nov 7, 2010)

phgsd said:


> My husband doesn't "train" per se - he did take Kessy herding for a while last year, when I wasn't able. Unfortunately she did not exactly behave herself, in the graze she was fine but moving the flock wasn't pretty. So that lasted about 3-4 lessons...LOL
> 
> He always comes to trials and shows and anything dog-related...whether it's 6 hours or 20 minutes away. He feeds the dogs about half the time, and he lets them out if he's home and I'm not. He's also processed many deer, sheep, etc to feed to the dogs. I don't think I could ask for much more! :wub:
> 
> ...


LOL @ that last line! Aw, you are so lucky to have such a great hubby


----------



## Mrs.K (Jul 14, 2009)

I WISH my husband was into it! Would make a lot of things easier!


----------



## Catu (Sep 6, 2007)

onyx'girl said:


> What I see at training, most teams are women dominated. Seldom are there more guys than women training in a club.
> And those guys are recruited to be helper/decoys!
> Just like the horse world, it seems women are more into competing. Maybe because there are no engines to tune or blame? LOL.


Just the opposite here. While in Agility there are plenty of women, on IPO I can think of roughly 6 women participating in competitions right now in Chile. Two of us have IPO-A1 titles with dogs trained by ourselves and that would be the highest level for the girl power.


----------



## wolfy dog (Aug 1, 2012)

Verivus said:


> I wish I could find a guy who is as interested as I am in dogs...


Ha, ha, check post 7 in this thread


----------



## doggiedad (Dec 2, 2007)

our dog is what i call pet/companion trained. both of
us spend time training together and seperate. when we
went to class sometimes my GF handled the dog and at
other times i handled the dog. we made sure we stayed 
on the same page with training and raising our dog (our
dog).


----------



## Nigel (Jul 10, 2012)

The wife and get along great normally, but when it comes to working with the dogs, we have to do it separately. She's way too serious at times and I'm just the opposite. We can usually exercise them together ok, but playing games like fetch, she has rules and I just throw the ball. Not everything has to be so structured in my opinion, sometimes dogs should just be dogs.


----------



## middleofnowhere (Dec 20, 2000)

From an observer's point of view -- clubs should charge extra for couples... Bickering surfaces in some couples consistently, in others less often and some not at all. There can be a humorus side to watching this but overall it wears thin pretty fast.


----------



## onyx'girl (May 18, 2007)

Wonder why clubs have family rates then! My first club, the helper was the helper and his SO was the TD, you can imagine the fun had. NOT~they had to constantly stroke each others ego or take their toys and go home. Yeah, they did leave together most of the time.


----------



## Jag (Jul 27, 2012)

I hope that if we get to a trial with this club that my wife will come and watch. She's talked about wanting to train some, but she doesn't really do much with Grim. She gets frustrated because he's so full of energy, so she doesn't play with him really. She does let him outside, put him in his kennel, etc. so it's not like she totally ignores him. She just says "he's your dog" or "this is your thing" and kind of stays out of it. Her dog is just rotten...so I don't think she'd be able to handle a GSD.


----------



## onyx'girl (May 18, 2007)

I told my husband to stay home when we did the BH, I didn't want to worry about him. I had enough to worry about! 
And many dogs will see(or just scent) their "special roommate" in the crowd on trial day and get really distracted...because the roomie is never there during training. If you want support at trial time, better have it now and then during training so it is not a big deal to your dog.


----------



## mycobraracr (Dec 4, 2011)

From what I have noticed, it's really just a matter of letting go and maybe a little stroking of the ego. For the most part it has been working really well for us. 

Jane- Believe me! I love the engine stuff too. I own a race shop and have been racing on and off for almost my whole life in some venue or another. The dogs for me are like an extension of that. I start with a good platform (GSD) and soup it up as much as I can (protection sports/training).


----------



## Jag (Jul 27, 2012)

onyx'girl said:


> I told my husband to stay home when we did the BH, I didn't want to worry about him. I had enough to worry about!
> And many dogs will see(or just scent) their "special roommate" in the crowd on trial day and get really distracted...because the roomie is never there during training. If you want support at trial time, better have it now and then during training so it is not a big deal to your dog.


I didn't think about that! Thank you!! He does get distracted by her even at home or on walks. I should have thought about that effect when he goes to trial! You're right, if she doesn't go to the club, she shouldn't go to trials probably.


----------



## Capone22 (Sep 16, 2012)

I wish my husband was as into it as I was. He considered doing decoy work, tried it and liked it. But it's just not his passion. And though he has learned A LOT training wise with the dogs he does not take constructive advice, criticism, or help from me well at all. If he worked a dog I would just stay out of the advice/help part and leave that up to other members. But he's supportive and would come to trials and stuff if I asked him to. 


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


----------



## phgsd (Jun 6, 2004)

onyx'girl said:


> I told my husband to stay home when we did the BH, I didn't want to worry about him. I had enough to worry about!
> And many dogs will see(or just scent) their "special roommate" in the crowd on trial day and get really distracted...because the roomie is never there during training. If you want support at trial time, better have it now and then during training so it is not a big deal to your dog.


I had that issue with Kessy, on both her Schh1 and OB2 she got up on her long down, it lost us 10 points each time. She was looking for my husband. We agreed he might have to stay home for her schutzhund trials, but I haven't trialed her again in Schh...


----------



## RowdyDogs (Nov 12, 2012)

I think it depends so much on the people involved.

I am a professional horse trainer, and I have a general rule of not dating horse people. I've dated another pro and that was a fine relationship based on mutual respect (ended because he really wanted kids and I really didn't at that time, but a great relationship and mutually beneficial when it came to horse training), but I've also dated guys who want to learn to ride, or (the worst) who think they know what they're doing because they grew up doing it and so are experts in their own minds. I have literally ended relationships because of training-related conflict. Note the plural there, too.

But total novice isn't great either. It's hard to teach someone you're in an intimate relationship with about training, at least from a professional standpoint. As a trainer, when I tell someone to do something, I expect them to either do it, or present a convincing argument about why it isn't appropriate. But often in an intimate relationship, you get the sass without the knowledge...your partner just subconsciously assumes you're equals there because you're equals in the relationship, if that makes sense (and I don't mean that in an offensive way, just obviously when it comes to training there are experience and knowledge differences). And I'm not alone in that...I've literally been hired to tell spouses something that my client has told them a million times, but somehow hearing it from someone who is a professional (as if that means anything in either horse or dog training--anyone can hang out a shingle, it just means you're being paid) makes it meaningful. It is stupid, but we all have our blind spots. 

I'm seeing a real future with my current BF (we're living together and talking about a future, so not crazy LOL), and a large part is his attitude to animals. He had 2 cats when we met, but loved horses and dogs too. He'd just never had them as an adult, and admits that. He supports me--he's at every competition I'm in, he goes to animal-related volunteer events, if I ask to help me with a training exercise (which happens pretty much daily) he's there...he clearly loves the animals too. I have to watch him because otherwise he spoils them too much!

So for me, that is perfect. We don't argue (well, not about the animals anyway...), we respect each other, and the biggest annoyance I have with him is impressing on him the difference between "off" and "down!" But also my best friend is happily married for 9 years now, 2 kids, and both are professional trainers who don't always see eye-to-eye...

So yeah, I guess I could have just ended this a lot earlier with my initial sentence. It depends on the people involved.


----------



## Mrs.K (Jul 14, 2009)

onyx'girl said:


> What I see at training, most teams are women dominated. Seldom are there more guys than women training in a club.
> And those guys are recruited to be helper/decoys!
> Just like the horse world, it seems women are more into competing. Maybe because there are no engines to tune or blame? LOL
> My DH has no interest in dog sport, he enjoys listening to me talk about our training days, or progress and understands whats going on, but to handle his own dog and compete...no. He's into fuel powered sports/runs a machine shop for race cars.


It is weird, because in Germany it's a mens world.


----------



## ohdev (Mar 26, 2012)

Boyfriend and I both enjoy dogs, but differently. He's a good helper with things like potty training and simple things, but when it comes to setting rules and being strict with the dogs, he's a total sucker for their puppy eyes  We got our lab when we lived together at college, he did a good portion of the potty training since I was in class a lot during the day and he was finishing his degree, but I did all of his formal obedience on my own. Now that we live separately back home, his formal training has slown to a halt and he's just a house pet, which is what my boyfriend and his family are happy with I suppose.

However, I think he gets a bit jealous when he sees all the cool things I do with Dean for training. He's everything the lab isn't, which is exactly what I wanted when looking for a dog really :blush: I try to get him engaged in whatever we're doing, but he gets frustrated with training since he's not used to it. I'm hoping that once I start taking Dean to herding lessons, or when I add another dog to our pack, he'll show a bit more enthusiasm and want to do more fun dog-related things with me.

If all else fails, at least I have a dependable pooper-scooper, right?


----------



## FG167 (Sep 22, 2010)

Liesje said:


> Um, I train with them ^  (or used to, *sniff*)


I complain on a FREQUENT basis how much I miss you 

It was pretty funny that we trained/traveled together so often that when Jason/I moved, everyone thought you were moving with us! You know you are still always welcome 



Tim Connell said:


> We train together constantly. (OB, bitework, and tracking). The key is always having a plan, and that alleviates any communication difficulties in the midst of a training session.
> 
> We find that we video a lot of our training, and that can go a long way toward showing the other person what happened during a session, and avoiding any sort of communication breakdown.


Agreed! It took a few bickering (ok a lot, but we kind of enjoy bickering  ) training sessions before we started doing this. Now that we work together, we've learned the give and take of advice/training when we handle the same dogs. Prior to that, we had "his" and "her" dogs and the handler had the final say. That works well for our personal dogs and the sharing works fine with work dogs. So far, so good 



phgsd said:


> He always comes to trials and shows and anything dog-related...whether it's 6 hours or 20 minutes away. He feeds the dogs about half the time, and he lets them out if he's home and I'm not.
> 
> He often comes out for my herding lessons - he takes pics, videos, just enjoys being out there. He will do some helper work for me in the backyard, he knows the basics.


Since we are now training dogs for a living, this has become more of our relationship. I train a LOT more often than Jason does these days (I have a much more extreme, hard to handle dog now than he does), and he is always there and supportive. However, this weekend he is trialing and I am going each day, all day to support him. Pics/videos are the best! 



Jag said:


> You're right, if she doesn't go to the club, she shouldn't go to trials probably.


This is the key. We regularly train/trial together so the dogs all are used to seeing the other one outside of the ring or whatever. They're just not interested.


----------



## lilLostduckie (Jan 22, 2013)

I am very interested in teaching my pup the sport, and have been in contact with my local club. My hubby and I are headed to view a training session later this week or next. I am the one primarily home with Willa, as his work has him traveling 3-4 days/week. That being said, I do all of her training. He gets annoyed when she listens to me and not him, though we are working him forming a bond with her when he is home. 

His main concern was him playfully smacking me and her lunging at him. I am really hoping that he will agree to take an active part of her training and come out to the club with me often.


----------



## Vinnie (Sep 4, 2001)

It’s funny but when I first made the decision that I was going to train a dog for SchH competition my husband really didn’t want anything to do with it. He had trained hunting dogs and that was more his interest. After visiting training with me a few times he became almost more interested in SchH than I was. (And I’d have to say he might be better than I am – jury is still out on that.)

My husband & I train together. In fact, I think it’s a huge benefit to have someone at home that can help me train. We do talk prior to working with each dog and tell each other what we’re working on, issues we’re having and what we want to accomplish, etc. I’m sure it helps that he is a few steps ahead of me in training. I’m much less likely to argue and better at listening to him when I’ve seen that he has successfully trained a step I’m working on currently. 

When we’re at “club” we’re both there to learn so we really don’t argue or bicker with each other there. At club we’re spending our time learning from someone else (the Training Director). We each have our own individual time with the TD and he shows/teaches us things relative to the individual dog we’re working. We’ll then bring what we learned home and incorporate that in our home training sessions. It’s great because at this point we’re at different places in our training and training different dogs that need different things. We each have different knowledge to share with each other.


----------



## CainGSD (Nov 15, 2003)

My late husband had only a passing interest in the dogs and training. His biggest complaint was that none of the SchH dogs had "house" manners. LOL they do have passable manners just not perfect.

I currently train with two different couples, both the women take the leads. One set the husband is an accomplished decoy but defers to his wife for the finer details of the total training package.

I am currently training with a good friend who also decoys. We often bang heads but will also listen to the other person who can see and spot issues while we are working. It is nice to have great working relationship with someone who is as committed to the training as I am.


----------



## Catu (Sep 6, 2007)

lilLostduckie said:


> His main concern was him playfully smacking me and her lunging at him. I am really hoping that he will agree to take an active part of her training and come out to the club with me often.


The best dates I've had are with dog people, maybe because I'm a bit OCD when it comes to dogs :crazy: but I can't imagine "sharing" a dog with anyone. All couples I know that work together, each has his/her own dog. My best friends are two couples and both have the same problem... when one take the leash of the dog the other was working usually someone gets offended.


----------

